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(BBC)   @drewcurtis, looking at all the crap on the @fark main page, why are all my submissions getting redlit?   (bbc.co.uk) divider line 66
    More: Obvious, Twitter, Virgin Media  
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7060 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Sep 2013 at 1:25 PM (51 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



66 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-09-19 01:11:44 PM
That was beautiful.
 
2013-09-19 01:26:10 PM
@subby, because you touch yourself at night. #NTTAWT
 
2013-09-19 01:26:21 PM
Drew : @submitter because half your crap sucks, now where's my whiskey @makersmark
 
2013-09-19 01:27:23 PM
Put some spelling errors in your headline, works every time.
 
2013-09-19 01:27:39 PM
haha well done

#fark #drew #yolo

/#slashies
 
2013-09-19 01:28:29 PM
@subby TotalFark.  $5 for insta-greens

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-09-19 01:30:11 PM
Maybe you should be funny and not suck; @subby.
 
2013-09-19 01:31:32 PM
This just in: Twitter is still dumb.

/poop coming out now
 
2013-09-19 01:32:07 PM
Subby, have you tried linking to opposing view?
 
2013-09-19 01:32:42 PM
I'm up to 60 greens at the moment.
 
2013-09-19 01:33:18 PM
@Ikea thanks now that I'm finally free not sure I can have kids #slatssuck @owmyballs
 
2013-09-19 01:33:32 PM
@toilet I have to poop so get ready!  #porcelainthrone #loosestool
 
2013-09-19 01:33:32 PM
Seriously, you whined and got greenlit?

In my previous life in Fark (not banned, just left to focus on RL stuff), it took me five years and a hundred submissions before I even got two of 'em.
 
2013-09-19 01:33:59 PM
Good one @subby
 
2013-09-19 01:34:42 PM
@farktv with sweat and dead mans balls #wemissfailmonday
 
2013-09-19 01:34:44 PM

real_headhoncho: I'm up to 60 greens at the moment.


You are truly gifted
 
2013-09-19 01:40:01 PM

jfivealive: real_headhoncho: I'm up to 60 greens at the moment.

You are truly gifted


Awww... you just have one greenie.  Don't worry, we all started at one.  Once.
 
2013-09-19 01:40:19 PM
@@sshole #subby @fark  uh, ....
I have no idea how the #, @, stuff works. It's twitter, right?
 
2013-09-19 01:44:53 PM

real_headhoncho: I'm up to 60 greens at the moment.


You pay them, don't you?  Cash?  Sexual favours?  Drugs?

Mods: I can match everything but the cash.
 
2013-09-19 01:45:51 PM

real_headhoncho: jfivealive: real_headhoncho: I'm up to 60 greens at the moment.

You are truly gifted

Awww... you just have one greenie.  Don't worry, we all started at one.  Once.


I am on the bottom of the fark hierarchy
 
2013-09-19 01:49:28 PM
@real_headhoncho: Holy crap are you serious??? I bet wherever you go chicks just literally throw themselves at you. I only wish one day too I can be as successful at the internet as you and talk down to anyone with an inferior 'greenlit' count also.
 
2013-09-19 01:50:12 PM
Criteria for getting greenlit:

a) misleading headline
b) misspellings in the headline
c) trolltastic headlines (i.e. hot teacher when actually not hot.)
d) copypasta headlines from the link
e) All of the above for insta-green
 
2013-09-19 01:54:21 PM
I've been farking for 13 years (lurked for a few, then created an account), have submitted many headlines, and have never been greened. As of a few years ago, I gave up submitting to the queue altogether.

/came to accept that headlines may not be my thing
 
2013-09-19 01:55:39 PM

Brosef Stalin: @real_headhoncho: Holy crap are you serious??? I bet wherever you go chicks just literally throw themselves at you. I only wish one day too I can be as successful at the internet as you and talk down to anyone with an inferior 'greenlit' count also.


Become a TotalFarker like me. It's only 5 bucks a month and automatically makes you superior to the liters. You also get a free cat.
 
2013-09-19 01:56:59 PM

PsyLord: Criteria for getting greenlit:

a) misleading headline
b) misspellings in the headline
c) trolltastic headlines (i.e. hot teacher when actually not hot.)
d) copypasta headlines from the link
e) All of the above for insta-green


You forgot

f) be a mod and have an alt that you submit links that you redlit/sniped from actual submissions.

/how many accounts have been found only 6 months old and have over 150 greens?
 
2013-09-19 01:57:05 PM

real_headhoncho: Become a TotalFarker like me. It's only 5 bucks a month and automatically makes you superior to the liters. You also get a free cat.


Just avoid TFD, they have a guy with a clown tattoo on his belly that will ass rape you. Clown belly bumping rape.
 
2013-09-19 01:57:53 PM

Head_Shot: I've been farking for 13 years (lurked for a few, then created an account), have submitted many headlines, and have never been greened. As of a few years ago, I gave up submitting to the queue altogether.

/came to accept that headlines may not be my thing


I've gotten a few but realized that writing funny or trolly headlines is not my thing. So I leave it up to the experts others.
 
2013-09-19 01:59:52 PM
#tcot
 
2013-09-19 02:00:05 PM
Ive only had a handful of my subs greenlit... I know why... because I really suck at writing headlines. =) but I admit it and savor those gems that do get the go ahead.
 
2013-09-19 02:00:40 PM

Brosef Stalin: @real_headhoncho: Holy crap are you serious??? I bet wherever you go chicks just literally throw themselves at you. I only wish one day too I can be as successful at the internet as you and talk down to anyone with an inferior 'greenlit' count also.


*Checks profile*...nope, no greens.

Freud was right.
 
2013-09-19 02:01:05 PM
...gotta make some room for all the buzzfeed articles...
 
2013-09-19 02:01:40 PM

real_headhoncho: Brosef Stalin: @real_headhoncho: Holy crap are you serious??? I bet wherever you go chicks just literally throw themselves at you. I only wish one day too I can be as successful at the internet as you and talk down to anyone with an inferior 'greenlit' count also.

Become a TotalFarker like me. It's only 5 bucks a month and automatically makes you superior to the liters. You also get a free cat.


A cat? That was the free pussy they were talking about...damn I've wasted like 6 years waiting for her to show up and you are telling me it was that damn cat all this time?
 
2013-09-19 02:02:30 PM
Lot of butthurt from people who evidently DNRTFA.

/stubmitter
 
2013-09-19 02:05:16 PM
as an unintended side-effect of this link I now have a list of twitter feeds that use our RSS feed
 
2013-09-19 02:05:47 PM

Literally Addicted: real_headhoncho: I'm up to 60 greens at the moment.

You pay them, don't you?  Cash?  Sexual favours?  Drugs?

Mods: I can match everything but the cash.


Don't listen to them, I can match everything but the cash, sexual favors, AND the drugs!
 
2013-09-19 02:07:46 PM

Joelogon: Lot of butthurt from people who evidently DNRTFA.

/stubmitter


Subtle.  Nice.

/facepalmed myself (it's actually a smack upside my own head)
 
2013-09-19 02:10:20 PM

Head_Shot: I've been farking for 13 years (lurked for a few, then created an account), have submitted many headlines, and have never been greened. As of a few years ago, I gave up submitting to the queue altogether.

/came to accept that headlines may not be my thing


I don't have your tenure, but yeah. Same here.

/Thought for sure the youtube video of a guy undressing a woman with an excavator would go green.
 
2013-09-19 02:12:18 PM

Head_Shot: I've been farking for 13 years (lurked for a few, then created an account), have submitted many headlines, and have never been greened. As of a few years ago, I gave up submitting to the queue altogether.

/came to accept that headlines may not be my thing


A good way to get greenlit is to include a pop-culture reference in the headline.

Example: Oil companies want to store carbon dioxide in underground caves. Morlocks not happy with plan

Sometimes it is not the headline, but the link you are submitted is what gets the green.

Example: Spike Milligan - Pakistani Daleks

But sometimes, it's best to just go for the giggle: Tall tree riddle solved by model. "It's like... trees are really tall, you know?"
 
2013-09-19 02:16:31 PM

Drew: as an unintended side-effect of this link I now have a list of twitter feeds that use our RSS feed


As an unintended side effect of Drew posting in this thread, it now will be flooded with posters trying to brown nose him.
 
2013-09-19 02:16:35 PM

Drew: as an unintended side-effect of this link I now have a list of twitter feeds that use our RSS feed


Clearly, I meant to do that.
 
2013-09-19 02:17:58 PM

real_headhoncho: Drew: as an unintended side-effect of this link I now have a list of twitter feeds that use our RSS feed

As an unintended side effect of Drew posting in this thread, it now will be flooded with posters trying to brown nose him.


If I wanted to get his attention the proper way is not to brown nose. It's to threaten.

Pay attention to me or I start blowing up a random whiskey distillery every week.
 
2013-09-19 02:26:13 PM

IdBeCrazyIf: real_headhoncho: Drew: as an unintended side-effect of this link I now have a list of twitter feeds that use our RSS feed

As an unintended side effect of Drew posting in this thread, it now will be flooded with posters trying to brown nose him.

If I wanted to get his attention the proper way is not to brown nose. It's to threaten.

Pay attention to me or I start blowing up a random whiskey distillery every week.


That may get you the kind of attention you may not want.
 
2013-09-19 02:30:02 PM
People who whine and biatch about what threads get greenlit and which ones don't are both hilarious and sad at the same time.
 
2013-09-19 02:31:12 PM

Brosef Stalin: @real_headhoncho: Holy crap are you serious??? I bet wherever you go chicks just literally throw themselves at you. I only wish one day too I can be as successful at the internet as you and talk down to anyone with an inferior 'greenlit' count also.


It would have worked better with "...'inferior'...".
 
2013-09-19 02:34:42 PM
It works, I shiat you not.

CSB

My wife was flying home from the east coast, and her initial flight was so delayed it was going to cause her to miss the connecting flight in Chicago. She spoke to every airline employee she could. I called Orbitz and United several times with no success or help. Every other flight was booked and she was going to be stuck in Chicago overnight. They weren't even going to find her a room or anything.

I took to twitter. I tagged United, told them her flight numbers and the issue. 20 minutes later, United tweeted me back that the connecting flight in Chicago was held so that she would have enough time to catch it. Gave me total respect for United and saved us $100's!
 
2013-09-19 02:35:00 PM

stonicus: People who whine and biatch about what threads get greenlit and which ones don't are both hilarious and sad at the same time.


Hey, I see you are a "onesie" too.
 
2013-09-19 02:36:17 PM

Drew: as an unintended side-effect of this link I now have a list of twitter feeds that use our RSS feed


Today I learned I'm a sentient RSS feed
 
2013-09-19 02:41:11 PM
well played, @subby #pisspantslaughing
 
2013-09-19 02:49:26 PM
@real_headhoncho: I'm just grateful that someone with 60 greenlits has taken the time to actually respond to me, with my total of zero. I will be sure to one day tell my grandchildren of this great honour.
 
2013-09-19 02:52:11 PM

real_headhoncho: IdBeCrazyIf: real_headhoncho: Drew: as an unintended side-effect of this link I now have a list of twitter feeds that use our RSS feed

As an unintended side effect of Drew posting in this thread, it now will be flooded with posters trying to brown nose him.

If I wanted to get his attention the proper way is not to brown nose. It's to threaten.

Pay attention to me or I start blowing up a random whiskey distillery every week.

That may get you the kind of attention you may not want.



For what it is worth, Drew has always replied to my emails promptly, and I have always thanked him for that.

/It is not flattery if it is true!
 
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