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(Slate)   This week's Dear Prudence is pretty tame. Until: "Recently, I have even taken to only shaving one leg so when I lie in bed at night I feel like a man is next to me"   (slate.com) divider line 180
    More: Strange, Prudi, Prudie advises, bed  
•       •       •

7619 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Sep 2013 at 5:37 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



180 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-09-18 04:50:40 PM  
When I pleasure myself (which unfortunately has been necessary since the split), I always end up in tears because it reinforces how lonely I am.

Is it really pleasuring yourself when you always end up in tears afterward?
 
2013-09-18 04:53:29 PM  
About two years ago I got pregnant and my husband went into a violent depression. He didn't speak to me for weeks except to tell me how I had ruined his life. Then, when I miscarried he celebrated. I started bleeding in the grocery store, and he fell to his knees and "praised God" for this wonderful blessing

If this is true that lady is dumb as shiat for sticking with the guy.
 
2013-09-18 04:54:03 PM  
o_O
 
2013-09-18 04:55:58 PM  
Headline should have said "Until things get hairy." Stupid stubmitter.

/stubmitter
 
2013-09-18 04:58:59 PM  
Wow, I laughed out loud.
 
2013-09-18 05:00:32 PM  
Your daughter is significantly overweight and has a mother who is morbidly obese, so both of you need to address your eating issues.
 

Morbid always has such a nice ring to it.  Also good for calling out the land whale and reminding her that children tend to more mimic then listen.
 
2013-09-18 05:01:02 PM  
The whole thing is a major train wreck from start to finish.  Holy crap.
 
2013-09-18 05:02:51 PM  

BumpInTheNight: Your daughter is significantly overweight and has a mother who is morbidly obese, so both of you need to address your eating issues.
 

Morbid always has such a nice ring to it.  Also good for calling out the land whale and reminding her that children tend to more mimic then listen.


I love how the mother tries to gloss over that fact by saying she has such a pretty face!
 
2013-09-18 05:24:30 PM  

scottydoesntknow: Is it really pleasuring yourself when you always end up in tears afterward?


I guess. It normally takes shaming myself in front of another to move me to tears.

Did I over share?
 
2013-09-18 05:30:57 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Did I over share?


If by "shaming myself" you meant "poop in my hand and rub it all over my body", then yes.  Yes you did.
 
2013-09-18 05:36:54 PM  
It's actually last week's DP.  Prudence was off this week for the Jewish holidays.
 
2013-09-18 05:40:04 PM  
A banana and a couple of kiwi fruit in bed with you will make you feel like a man is there.
 
2013-09-18 05:40:09 PM  
:(
 
2013-09-18 05:40:44 PM  
Just makes me glad I got out of my last marriage and reconnected with someone who makes me ridiculously happy.
 
2013-09-18 05:43:22 PM  
She could always shave both legs and pretend she's sleeping with a swimmer or competitive body builder.  If it's going to be her fantasy, why fantasize about the disgusting, low hanging, hairy fruit.
 
2013-09-18 05:43:56 PM  
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-09-18 05:45:54 PM  
I keep my left leg shaved so it feels like I'm sleeping with a woman in the bed.

/so lonely
 
2013-09-18 05:48:11 PM  

scottydoesntknow: When I pleasure myself (which unfortunately has been necessary since the split), I always end up in tears because it reinforces how lonely I am.

Is it really pleasuring yourself when you always end up in tears afterward?


If you're doing it right.
 
2013-09-18 05:53:01 PM  
Ok, that was a little weird.
 
2013-09-18 05:54:12 PM  
I am lonely but there is nothing she can say that can fix where I am.  Unless she can hook me up with some hot chicks in my area.
 
2013-09-18 05:54:18 PM  
So she pleasures herself and doesn't shave her leg(s). Tell me again how this is so different than marriage?
 
2013-09-18 05:54:42 PM  

Tom_Slick: About two years ago I got pregnant and my husband went into a violent depression. He didn't speak to me for weeks except to tell me how I had ruined his life. Then, when I miscarried he celebrated. I started bleeding in the grocery store, and he fell to his knees and "praised God" for this wonderful blessing

If this is true that lady is dumb as shiat for sticking with the guy.


This. A thousand times this! If I were her, I would've left his ass in the frozen food aisle and never looked back.
 
2013-09-18 05:55:39 PM  
Would someone please get this woman a "I Fuk on the First Date" T-shirt. And shave her leg FFS.
 
2013-09-18 05:57:24 PM  
scottydoesntknow
When I pleasure myself (which unfortunately has been necessary since the split), I always end up in tears because it reinforces how lonely I am.

Is it really pleasuring yourself when you always end up in tears afterward?


Calling it "self-abuse" might be warranted in this instance.
 
2013-09-18 05:57:38 PM  
I feel like I should send her a cookbook or something

blogs.publishersweekly.com
 
2013-09-18 05:58:05 PM  

BraveNewCheneyWorld: She could always shave both legs and pretend she's sleeping with a swimmer or competitive body builder.  If it's going to be her fantasy, why fantasize about the disgusting, low hanging, hairy fruit.


Women want to dream about proud and successful men, not closeted betas with way too many self-image issues.
 
2013-09-18 06:00:32 PM  

MutantMotherMouse: So she pleasures herself and doesn't shave her leg(s). Tell me again how this is so different than marriage?


Wow, that's a really low expectations marriage.
 
2013-09-18 06:00:46 PM  
I always end up in tears because it reinforces how lonely I am.

Did you ask if you were OK? Did you keep going as you were crying?
 
2013-09-18 06:01:30 PM  
www.reactiongifs.com
 
2013-09-18 06:01:45 PM  

uber humper: I feel like I should send her a cookbook or something

[blogs.publishersweekly.com image 304x463]


No, you should send her
img.humorsharing.com
 
2013-09-18 06:02:13 PM  

uber humper: I feel like I should send her a cookbook or something

[blogs.publishersweekly.com image 304x463]


Cooking for one is pretty depressing.
 
2013-09-18 06:04:24 PM  

Treygreen13: scottydoesntknow: When I pleasure myself (which unfortunately has been necessary since the split), I always end up in tears because it reinforces how lonely I am.

Is it really pleasuring yourself when you always end up in tears afterward?

If you're doing it right.


Using your own tears as lube, of course.
 
2013-09-18 06:06:18 PM  
I snore like a chainsaw and emit bed shaking farts so I can feel like I'm sleeping with my last male ex. When I pleasure myself, it reminds me of how much better I am at it then he was.
 
2013-09-18 06:06:51 PM  

empres77: Treygreen13: scottydoesntknow: When I pleasure myself (which unfortunately has been necessary since the split), I always end up in tears because it reinforces how lonely I am.

Is it really pleasuring yourself when you always end up in tears afterward?

If you're doing it right.

Using your own tears as lube, of course.


I prefer to use the tears of nice guys who buy dinner over and over again hoping to one day sleep together.
 
2013-09-18 06:09:04 PM  
Eventually she'll get some cats and a TotalFark account and all will be "fine"

feminspire.com
 
2013-09-18 06:09:22 PM  

Tom_Slick: About two years ago I got pregnant and my husband went into a violent depression. He didn't speak to me for weeks except to tell me how I had ruined his life. Then, when I miscarried he celebrated. I started bleeding in the grocery store, and he fell to his knees and "praised God" for this wonderful blessing

If this is true that lady is dumb as shiat for sticking with the guy.


Yeah, that was my (and apparently Prudie's) reaction as well.  Yikes.  That guy's a major farking tool, but she should have enough sense to get the hell out of there.
 
2013-09-18 06:12:26 PM  

Witness99: I snore like a chainsaw and emit bed shaking farts so I can feel like I'm sleeping with my last male ex. When I pleasure myself, it reminds me of how much better I am at it then he was.


LOL
 
2013-09-18 06:13:38 PM  

Riche: Eventually she'll get some cats and a TotalFark account and all will be "fine"

[feminspire.com image 750x500]


Check out this eHarmony video. Very TF: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTTwcCVajAc
 
2013-09-18 06:14:44 PM  

BumpInTheNight: BraveNewCheneyWorld: She could always shave both legs and pretend she's sleeping with a swimmer or competitive body builder.  If it's going to be her fantasy, why fantasize about the disgusting, low hanging, hairy fruit.

Women want to dream about proud and successful men, not closeted betas with way too many self-image issues.


I'm having a hard time seeing michael phelps or arnold schwarzenegger as "closeted betas".
 
2013-09-18 06:15:35 PM  

UsikFark: uber humper: I feel like I should send her a cookbook or something

[blogs.publishersweekly.com image 304x463]

Cooking for one is pretty depressing.


At least you're not eating for two.
 
2013-09-18 06:16:06 PM  

happydude45: MutantMotherMouse: So she pleasures herself and doesn't shave her leg(s). Tell me again how this is so different than marriage?

Wow, that's a really low expectations marriage.


No, that sounds about right.
 
2013-09-18 06:17:56 PM  
I started shaving half my pubes for similar reasons...
 
2013-09-18 06:19:06 PM  

uber humper: Riche: Eventually she'll get some cats and a TotalFark account and all will be "fine"

[feminspire.com image 750x500]

Check out this eHarmony video. Very TF: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTTwcCVajAc


Well, at least she doesn't trick you by hiding the crazy.
 
2013-09-18 06:20:32 PM  

Witness99: I snore like a chainsaw and emit bed shaking farts so I can feel like I'm sleeping with my last male ex. When I pleasure myself, it reminds me of how much better I am at it then he was.


How YOU doin'?

/oblig
 
2013-09-18 06:22:28 PM  

BraveNewCheneyWorld: uber humper: Riche: Eventually she'll get some cats and a TotalFark account and all will be "fine"

[feminspire.com image 750x500]

Check out this eHarmony video. Very TF: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTTwcCVajAc

Well, at least she doesn't trick you by hiding the crazy.


You guys know this is just a viral video created by some actress, right?
 
2013-09-18 06:23:19 PM  
I've been thinking about getting some bolt-on boobs so I can feel some actually titty on occasion.

/I'll be over here curled up in a ball crying softly to myself
 
2013-09-18 06:23:38 PM  
WTF?!? No wonder every man ever thinks all chicks are crazy!

Not that I'm particularly sane, but I like to think of myself as fun crazy. You know instead of cut your junk off crazy.
 
2013-09-18 06:24:22 PM  

puckrock2000: BraveNewCheneyWorld: uber humper: Riche: Eventually she'll get some cats and a TotalFark account and all will be "fine"

[feminspire.com image 750x500]

Check out this eHarmony video. Very TF: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTTwcCVajAc

Well, at least she doesn't trick you by hiding the crazy.

You guys know this is just a viral video created by some actress, right?


Yea, if you click on here channel she has a few more.  Pretty funny stuff.
 
2013-09-18 06:24:48 PM  

farkin_noob: WTF?!? No wonder every man ever thinks all chicks are crazy!

Not that I'm particularly sane, but I like to think of myself as fun crazy. You know instead of cut your junk off crazy.


I haven't seen you in forever. We thought you died.
 
2013-09-18 06:25:02 PM  
Then, when I miscarried he celebrated. I started bleeding in the grocery store, and he fell to his knees and "praised God" for this wonderful blessing.

The GIF was too big to post :-(
 
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