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Boy struck by lightning always conducted himself well, Miss Kansas flashes her tats, and inflatable colon comes to NYC to be around assholes: a few of Fark's favorite Headlines of the Week for 9/8 - 9/14 
Posted by Unfreakable at 2013-09-17 3:27:52 PM (7 comments) | Permalink

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4073 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Sep 2013 at 3:34 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Howdy everybody, enjoy.

Headlines Of The Week for Sun 2013-09-08 to Sat 2013-09-14:

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Congresswoman's daughter born with Potter's Syndrome, wasn't expected to survive, is now the girl who lived  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Iraq's WMDs to move to Russia  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Classmates remember boy struck by lightning as someone who always conducted himself well  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Giant inflatable colon comes to New York City, because it's used to being near assholes  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  "Miss Kansas will show her tats during the bikini competition" is today's unfortunate non-typo  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Serial hoon who thought it would be a lark to touch up his mate in Nerang gets blasted by magistrate. The only way this headline could be more Australian would be if it was drunk. And venomous  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Man attempting to cross the Atlantic attached to helium-filled balloons ends his trip after only 12 hours due to "technical issues," which may be just a fancy way of saying "he sobered up"  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  ...So I built a third boardwalk. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp. But the fourth one will stay up, and that's what you're going to get, lad. The strongest boardwalk in Jersey  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Tal Shiar searching for sexual predator after a 72-year-old woman was sexually assaulted in Romulus  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Holy shiat  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  World's second-oldest man moves to the front of the line  


Sports:

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Fenway Park to get a statue of Carl Yastrzemski. In other news, Citizens Bank Park no longer features the Michael Young statue at 3B  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Derek Jeter goes back to the DL, giving him a chance to pass Ralph Kiner's all-time record for shagging the daylights out of staggeringly hot women  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Mark Sanchez needs surgery for a labral tear, surprised that guys have them  


Geek:

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Up up down down left right left right B A stab  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Harvard and MIT join to research artificial intelligence, brain limitations, people who are accepted into Yale  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Scientists create new memories by directly changing the brain. Admittedly, being stabbed in the brain by a scientist is kind of a memorable event  


Entertainment:

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Disney delays Pirates of the Caribbean 5 because of "script issues," which is Hollywood-speak for "the huge wad of money we lost on Lone Ranger"  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Mario Lopez celebrates his wife successfully giving birth to a son, and when he finds the guy who impregnated her he's going to kick his ass  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  How Anthony Bourdain spent his summer vacation: chilling in Jersey beach rental, living the "suburban/vacation dream, backyard barbecues, entertaining at home -- what some troubled observers have referred to as my 'going Full Ina'"  


Politics:

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  New bill cuts funding for official Washington D.C. portraits. Government leaders advised to just substitute their mug shots  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Red Green voted out in Norway. And so begins the winter of their discount tent  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Those chemical weapons which Iraq had, then were moved to Syria, then Syria didn't have, now Syria does have, now are in Iraq. Confused? You won't be after this episode of the UN Security Council  


Business:

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Galant Food Co. recalls calzones for undeclared allergen, Goofus Food Co. tells consumers to go fark themselves  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  UK's Mirror investigated for phone hacking gnikcah enohp rof detagitsevni rorriM s'KU  

[image from img.fark.net too old to be available]  Olive oil may not really be virgin. Popeye is not going to like this
· · ·
(view entire blog)


7 Comments   (+0 »)
   
 
2013-09-17 04:37:32 PM  
Thanks for all the work behind the scenes, Unfreakable.
 
2013-09-17 04:51:58 PM  
Holy crap, my 2nd green ever is a HOTW candidate.

/Miss Kansas
//still like my Dolby obit one better
 
2013-09-17 05:03:36 PM  

phlegmmo: Thanks for all the work behind the scenes, Unfreakable.


I should be saying the same to you
 
2013-09-17 06:24:07 PM  

Banned on the Run: Holy crap, my 2nd green ever is a HOTW candidate.

/Miss Kansas
//still like my Dolby obit one better


You did the Dolby obit? I lolled, nicely done.
 
2013-09-17 08:06:43 PM  

Barfmaker: Banned on the Run: Holy crap, my 2nd green ever is a HOTW candidate.

/Miss Kansas
//still like my Dolby obit one better

You did the Dolby obit? I lolled, nicely done.


Mine was redlit: "Surround ground"
 
2013-09-17 09:45:40 PM  
Curses! Foiled again.
 
2013-09-17 10:22:57 PM  

Banned on the Run: Holy crap, my 2nd green ever is a HOTW candidate.

/Miss Kansas
//still like my Dolby obit one better


Nice. I liked that one.

Also LOL'd hard at the Gallant/Goofus one.

/The inflatable colon headline was mine
//Third ever HOTW
///First one for the main page.
 
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