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(Some Dad)   Thoughtful, well written message about how non-parents don't know anything about parenting and should keep their filthy mouths shut   (themattwalshblog.com) divider line 84
    More: Amusing, Lacunar amnesia  
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12825 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Sep 2013 at 7:02 AM (45 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-09-17 07:05:08 AM
6 votes:
if i have to listen to your screeching brat on the bus, i get to have an opinion
2013-09-17 07:06:22 AM
5 votes:
Today's popcorn thread. Go!
2013-09-17 08:17:45 AM
4 votes:
I don't have kids, but they don't bother me at all. They're pretty funny when they run around screaming and breaking stuff. Even a bawling baby on the airplane is probably having massive stabby pains in the ear, so I feel sorry for them.
I do hate new mommies though. That tone of voice they use, even with other adults. They almost never look happy. And what is it with the farking khaki mom shorts with the little turned up cuffs? And the $2,000 strollers (Hoboken thing maybe)? I can't go to my local Starbucks any more - it's been occupied by lame-shorts-wearing new mommies babytalking to other new mommies about snowflake stuff. farking kill me.
Then there's the mommy bloggers. A real live human woman who is not at all embarrassed to call themselves a mommy blogger or mommy advocate. I can't fap to that. I can't fap to that at all.
2013-09-17 08:03:00 AM
4 votes:
I am a big fan of opera.  When my two girls used to act up in the store I would begin to belt out the final scene of "Don Giovanni" at the top of my lungs.  Yah, it got me a few looks, but it only took a couple of bars and it was like my kids were walking in a funeral procession.  Worked like the sweet, sweet musical magic it is.
2013-09-17 07:40:47 AM
4 votes:
Kid melting down in a utilitarian place like a grocery store? Who cares. At a nice restaurant, say Red Lobster or Olive Garden? Not cool man.
2013-09-17 10:01:03 AM
3 votes:
i306.photobucket.com
2013-09-17 09:04:34 AM
3 votes:

Jim_Callahan: Seriously, man, raising a kid is not rocket science. Any idiot can do it,


This has to be the funniest single thing I'll see today. You are simultaneously advocating locking children in the car alone, which in most states will get you a free wood shampoo on your way to the pokey, and boasting about your mad parenting skillz.

You are my new hero.
2013-09-17 08:26:53 AM
3 votes:
All you need to know about raising kids is that they don't like bright light, don't get them wet, and no matter how much they beg or cry, never feed them after midnight.
2013-09-17 07:32:16 AM
3 votes:
I don't hate kids.

I hate your kids.
2013-09-17 07:27:40 AM
3 votes:

Falstaff: As a new father of twin girls, feel free to express any opinion you want.  I may laugh, I may tell you off.  Either way, we'll be good.

Do NOT, however, just walk up and start rubbing their cheek or stroking their hair.  I just about knocked a woman out last night for doing that.  Didn't say two words to me, just walks up and starts rubbing my youngest's head.  Creepy as hell.


Some folks, (mostly old women) think they have a god-given right to touch whomever they want with their nasty buzzard claws.
2013-09-17 07:25:54 AM
3 votes:
I have a cat, isn't that about the same?
2013-09-17 07:24:14 AM
3 votes:
Something tells me that many of these parents who want you to "just deal with" their shrieking crotchfruit have a slightly different opinion on second-hand smoke.
2013-09-17 07:21:45 AM
3 votes:
Has a solution:

mimg.ugo.com

/mmmmm.... chicken popcorn
2013-09-17 07:15:36 AM
3 votes:
This is gonna be good when the "my kids are angels" crowd shows up.
2013-09-17 12:51:14 PM
2 votes:

New Slang: Why punish the parent?  Just slap the kid up the back of the head or trip them when the parent is not looking


FINALLY, some rational thinking in this thread.

CSB: Ye Olde Airplane situation
So I'm on a flight (fairly short connecting one) and I have the 7 year old behind me.  Not A 7-year-old, THE 7-year-old.  The one that had his DVD player run out of batteries before we left the tarmac and started kicking the back of my seat nonstop.  Non. Stop.

So I ask the kid to stop (mostly out of politeness), then ask mom to have him stop.  "Oh, if his DVD is out of batteries there's no controlling him.  Be glad it's the only thing he's doing".  So, I ignore it for the first 30 minutes or so.  Mom has started reading and stopped talking at all.

     kid: Mom, this is BORING.  I don't have anything to do.  Mom.  MOM!
     me: hey kid, you wanna see if your double jointed?
     kid: SURE!
[snip - I had him check for hitch hikers thumb and bend his arm in impossible ways]
     me: Your'e not that flexible, I bet you cant even touch your knees to your chin.
     kid: I can so! [curls into fetal position]

I then reclined the seat and trapped him in that position.  I then put my ipod on with the volume up.  Mom tried to get the flight attendant to let me go, but she insisted that I was free to recline if I wanted to.  I only got to screw that kid over for about 15 minutes, but MAN it was worth all the biatching and moaning till the end of the flight just to punish him.
2013-09-17 09:36:29 AM
2 votes:

chubby muppet: As a new parent, I am very aware of my surroundings.  I would never stay in a store if my baby was having a meltdown.  You take her outside and if there's no hope of calming down, you go home.  Sure it's inconvenient, but rolling the dice is part of being a parent.  You take your chances, and many times it's good with a lot of people smiling and saying hi to you and your baby.  But on those bad days you pack it up and go home.  Very very simple.


Grocery stores are the last place on earth I would expect peace and quiet. Who cares? Your crying baby is drowning out the Billy Joel song on the Muzak machine, so thanks for that. You know what's more annoying in a grocery store? The husband/boyfriend who just stands with the cart in front of the tomatoes, staring at his blackberry, while the wife/girlfriend runs around doing the actual shopping. fark that guy. Useless.
2013-09-17 09:35:42 AM
2 votes:

jayhawk88: The twins in public thing is one of the weirdest phenomenon ever. I can't say we ever had a "strangers touching" problem, but just everywhere, everyone has to know "do they run in your family" or "are they identical". It does lessen the older they get, though.


How much older? I'm 46 and random strangers still feel the need to comment on my breasts.
2013-09-17 09:13:12 AM
2 votes:
How has this not been posted yet????

i242.photobucket.com
2013-09-17 08:48:18 AM
2 votes:
Perfect for baby showers:
www.barkingpet.com
2013-09-17 08:46:03 AM
2 votes:
Did you hear the story about two assholes that met at the supermarket?
2013-09-17 08:08:15 AM
2 votes:
Got to the point where all I had to do was clear my throat, and they were like...."Holy Shat, dad is going to start singing!"
2013-09-17 08:01:38 AM
2 votes:

Cozret: The Muthaship: Since when did experience count for anything?

So an M.D. without kids vs Jenny McCarthy . . .you're taking her view on vaccination then?


I swear those goalposts were here a minute ago....
2013-09-17 07:56:28 AM
2 votes:

TalenLee: earthwirm: TalenLee: earthwirm: Lady J: if i have to listen to your screeching brat on the bus, i get to have an opinion

Actually, no you don't. Deal with it.

That's just a flat out lie. I get to have an opinion on anything. Now, the idea that a person doesn't get to express their opinion because you don't think it's justified or morally acceptable or whatever is fine, but I'm fairly sure that telling them their opinion is flat-out not allowed to exist is, at the very least, dickish.

No, it's called humanity. Instead of having a rude demeanor and making everyone days bad , you can choose to lighten the mood or help. Being a jack wagon doesn't and won't help.

You seem to misunderstand me.

I'm not saying 'the opinion about children is A or B.'

I'm saying 'telling someone they're not allowed to have any opinion at all is dickish.'

And... I dunno, it sounds like two people are frustrated and upset with the circumstances, but only one of them is allowed to feel that way because they're a parent, the other is someone uninvolved in the child's life...?


I've run into this kind of attitude before...

"You can't have an opinion on abortion! You're a MAN!"
2013-09-17 07:51:24 AM
2 votes:
I hate that children are our future. We need another alternative.
2013-09-17 07:41:33 AM
2 votes:

Cozret: I'm always impressed at how proud parents are of having accomplished tasks that the major of organisms on the planet accomplish.


Sounds like you really hold your parents in contempt.
2013-09-17 07:36:56 AM
2 votes:

Angry_Monkey: I guess this is the thread where inconsiderate parents justify being inconsiderate.


C'mon, it's a really hard job and they're more qualified than you because they had sex that caused pregnancy. It's not like you can go do that.
2013-09-17 07:36:21 AM
2 votes:

justanothersumguy: FTA  "Parenting is the easiest thing in the world to have an opinion about, but the hardest thing in the world to do."

This


i BET rocket science is harder.
2013-09-17 07:35:47 AM
2 votes:
I have no full-time children but I have a few nieces and nephews that I see every once in a while and I've raised an extremely well-behaved dog, so I really think that my opinion on parenting has merit.
2013-09-17 07:31:29 AM
2 votes:
 Crib midgets. Crotch fruit. Sex trophies. Crotch droppings. Crumb snatchers. Womb rats. Ankle biters. Snowflakes. Spawn.
Miss any?
2013-09-17 07:25:30 AM
2 votes:

Bslim: Keep your filthy crotchfruit at home.


Keep your filthy untouchable ass at home.

Your move
2013-09-17 07:16:25 AM
2 votes:

Mugato: I have a niece and nephew I take out sometimes and I've never had any problems with their throwing a tantrum or acting up. Take some parenting classes, get a nanny or go to the nearest PetSmart and buy a muzzle. Failing all of that, don't get all indignant when someone expresses annoyance at your shrieking spawn.No one should yell at you or anything but don't get all uppity if someone's natural reaction is to look annoyed in your direction.


Wow, you sound like a parenting expert.
2013-09-17 07:12:52 AM
2 votes:
I am not a doctor, but you non-doctors will keep your whore mouths shut and listen to my medical opinions.
2013-09-17 07:10:45 AM
2 votes:

Lady J: if i have to listen to your screeching brat on the bus, i get to have an opinion


Actually, no you don't. Deal with it.
2013-09-17 03:59:12 PM
1 votes:

Tat'dGreaser: I don't understand people who hate children so much. You do know you were that screaming a-hole at one point in your life right?


Problem is that some of them still are screaming a-holes.
2013-09-17 01:53:36 PM
1 votes:
Okay, oh childless peoplewith all of your disposable income, let us mere peasant parents know exactly which places we are allowed to bring our children so as not to intrude upon your precious world of peace and quiet.  Because so far, I've noticed that I'm not allowed to take my children:

1. On any form of public transportation you might be riding
2. In any restaurant you eat at
3. To sporting events of any kind
4. Down a sidewalk where you might be walking
5. To any entertainment venue which you might be at
6. To any store in which you might be shopping

Now, tell me...who's the special snowflake?
2013-09-17 01:49:56 PM
1 votes:

RumsfeldsReplacement: I do feel like I should at least point out that the author of this blog is somebody who declined to immunize his children against Hepatitis B because only people who have promiscuous sex get Hepatitis B.

So we're not talking about a rocket surgeon here.


i302.photobucket.com

/You're not dealing with morons here.
2013-09-17 12:59:29 PM
1 votes:
What Bullshiat.

The kid would not be having a tantrum if she raised her kids right knowing that only "the look" should shut them up.
Instead this kids carries one because he knows he is going to get away with it.

Damn pure and simple.

I was a kid once. You were too, remember? You always push the line to see how far you can go.
Mine was a short line compared to the pansy society of today.
2013-09-17 12:17:00 PM
1 votes:
Why punish the parent?  Just slap the kid up the back of the head or trip them when the parent is not looking
2013-09-17 12:05:02 PM
1 votes:

Mugato: The problem people have is with parents who either ignore their shrieking kid or think it's somehow cute, not with the kid itself.


How cute, you think the parents care what your opinion is.
2013-09-17 11:36:03 AM
1 votes:
OK I'm convinced. having kids looks like it could be fun
i26.photobucket.com

Ahh nah, not it doesn't
i26.photobucket.com
2013-09-17 11:15:22 AM
1 votes:

Doc Daneeka: onzmadi: There are places you can go if you want food without the child experience, they are called bars and expensive restaurants.
If you are biatching about kids in a grocery store, a family restaurant, the bus or in a park
you really properly need to shut the hell up.

Pretty much.

I don't take my toddler to nice restaurants (anything nicer than a diner or a Friday's).  I don't take him to the movies (except a couple times to a G-rated animated film, matinee showing).


My rule of thumb for restaurants is that if they have high chairs, they expect to have kids.  I'm not taking the <1 year olds to Ruth Chris, don't get too upset with me if they are at Perkins and drop some cheerios.  :-)

My little ones are still way to young to take to the movies.  They can't even sit through a full episode of Caillou.
2013-09-17 10:32:28 AM
1 votes:

Bslim: Keep your filthy crotchfruit at home.


You're not even trying for subtle. If you are going to troll, you need to learn how to do it right.

0/10 I blame your parents.
2013-09-17 10:21:00 AM
1 votes:

TalenLee: earthwirm: Lady J: if i have to listen to your screeching brat on the bus, i get to have an opinion

Actually, no you don't. Deal with it.

That's just a flat out lie. I get to have an opinion on anything. Now, the idea that a person doesn't get to express their opinion because you don't think it's justified or morally acceptable or whatever is fine, but I'm fairly sure that telling them their opinion is flat-out not allowed to exist is, at the very least, dickish.


But...he's a PARENT! It's sooooo haaaarrrrddd!!!!
2013-09-17 10:14:18 AM
1 votes:
marsoft:

I think this one is better http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n6XZ-0ns2yA

I actually did something very similar when I had taken my oldest niece shopping when she was about 5.  (She's now 36)...she started up, and I just mimicked everything she did, but more animated and louder.  I'm sure the folks in Farm & Fleet got quite a show of my then young 20 something self jumping up and down, flapping my arms and whining about how I wanted a sparkle pony for my birthday and didn't get one.

Confusion gave way to giggles, then we were done.   Took maybe 3 minutes.
2013-09-17 10:06:06 AM
1 votes:

jayhawk88: Mugato: jayhawk88: Falstaff: As a new father of twin girls, feel free to express any opinion you want.  I may laugh, I may tell you off.  Either way, we'll be good.

Do NOT, however, just walk up and start rubbing their cheek or stroking their hair.  I just about knocked a woman out last night for doing that.  Didn't say two words to me, just walks up and starts rubbing my youngest's head.  Creepy as hell.

The twins in public thing is one of the weirdest phenomenon ever. I can't say we ever had a "strangers touching" problem, but just everywhere, everyone has to know "do they run in your family" or "are they identical". It does lessen the older they get, though.

Maybe you guys can answer this. Do you dress your twins in identical outfits, if so, why? Is there a twin discount like buy one get one half off or something? And wouldn't that cause identity issues? Anyway, it's creepy, reminds me of The Shining.

Not that often, but it does happen sometimes. It's a mother thing for the most part I think, it looks "cute" and is "adorable". When I dressed them I didn't even bother to put them in matching clothes, which is pretty much the worst thing you could ever do.

Once they got old enough to have input into what they wore, they would want to dress alike themselves, but again, not that often.



Thanks for your reply. I have a friend who does this to their twins and without judging, I think it's farked up. I was just wondering what the thought process was behind people who do it.

Their names don't rhyme, do they?
2013-09-17 09:40:39 AM
1 votes:

jfivealive: I think a touch of ground cyclists will do also.


Too much asshole spoils the loaf.
2013-09-17 09:34:58 AM
1 votes:

Freudian_slipknot: Yes, parents are always smart and do the best for their kids.  Those who only have a basic grasp of reality can't hope to compete with that

http://www.healio.com/pediatrics/journals/pedann/%7Bb09dbfc1-b28f-47 01 -b42c-527bb369f62b%7D/a-3-year-old-girl-with-eye-pain   (Warning: graphic example of the kind of expert having a child makes you)


Holy shiat! Something bad happened to a kid? Stop the farking presses.

HEY EVERYONE, Freudian Slipknot just found an article in a medical journal about parents being dumbasses. This means that all parents are stupid, FS is an expert on child rearing, and all of your arguments are invalid.

// Oh bless you kind sir! Bless your little heart!
2013-09-17 09:29:36 AM
1 votes:

Jim_Callahan: {Let me take my asshattery and ignorance and share it as helpful parenting tip]


Congrats, I thought the dumbest farking thing I could ever read would be in the politics tab ... but I can tell your a special kind of stupid.

// Goddamn that was idiotic and we are all are dumber from having read it.
2013-09-17 09:28:55 AM
1 votes:

ph0rk: Some parents have very well behaved children that do not annoy other adults when in public. If this does not describe your children and you persist in taking them out in public, you are bad and you should feel bad.


Lol, no. Sometimes children are well behaved in public. But no children are always well behaved in public. You are wrong, and you should feel wrong.
2013-09-17 09:17:02 AM
1 votes:

smoky2010: If I have to tolerate your moronic offspring, then you have to tolerate my opinion

/if you don't like it, too bad


You are awesome! "Hey lady, if your 3-yo wants to scream and cry look at me, I'm a grown person who's going to show him up. Look at me!! LOOK AT ME!!"

// Farktard
2013-09-17 09:14:27 AM
1 votes:
Of course non-parents are allowed to have opinions on how to rear human mini-beasts.
It's just that hvaing an opinoin and having a valid opinion is two different things.
And having an opinion and loudly voicing that opinion is two different things.

See, if you think blue is a better color for a car than yellow, that's perfectly okay. Going up to every yellow-colored car you see and loudly proclaiming that they suck at owning cars is still stupid.

And, if you think that it sucks that your your car has four wheels and that it would be better if it had three that is perfectly within your right. You're wrong, but so are we all at some point or another. Not voicing your very very stupid opinion will help you convince others that you are not very very stupid. So please keep your mouth shut.

To paraphrase (and translate) Håvamål:

It's better to keep your mouth shut
And let people belive you a fool
than to open your mouth
and remove all doubt.

PS! in old norse it rhymes and is thus more awsome
2013-09-17 09:00:19 AM
1 votes:
I've never pitched in the big leagues either, but I recognize a guy who can't find the strike zone when I see one.
2013-09-17 08:53:15 AM
1 votes:

Mrs.Sharpier: These kids are our future surgeons, police officers, scientists etc.


I'll give you the police officers, but the future scientists and surgeons are sitting down to supper in India right about now.
2013-09-17 08:41:17 AM
1 votes:
"Many people, big and small, are assholes"
3.bp.blogspot.com
2013-09-17 08:37:52 AM
1 votes:
I can't lay an egg, either. But I can smell a bad one.
2013-09-17 08:33:16 AM
1 votes:
Probably 60 international flights and I only ever had one mid-flight meltdown.... with an 8 month old.   Nothing I could do... but since I'm the Dad I was getting disapproving looks from some females.  Fat, ugly woman right behind me said "why don't you control that child.  She woke me up" in the rudest possible tone.  I asked her if crying babies bothered her on airplanes.  She said yes, of course.  So I told her loud enough for the cabin to hear "the get your own private farking airplane and you won't have that problem".  She got laughed at by about 50 people and, as if by magic, baby stopped crying and started laughing too.
2013-09-17 08:23:23 AM
1 votes:

Cyclometh: Lady J:

encountering =/= encountering screeching brat

Spare me. You could be on the bus with a mom on her way to the doctor with a child that has an earache, or fell down getting on and barked a shin and is crying about it and you'd be right there with the other delicate flowers in this thread telling her she's a bad mother and should get off the bus until her "fark trophy" calms down, right?

I swear, every one of these threads is like a catalog of entitled snowflakes. Bunch of candy-asses, I can't believe you can possibly function in the real world.

What the fark do you people do when instead of having an encounter with a child, you run into an adult who is actually an asshole?


Man, I wonder where those people come from? I'm sure their parents raised them right, because parents are always right about their kids.
2013-09-17 08:19:03 AM
1 votes:

marsoft: Cozret: marsoft: Sounds like you really hold your parents in contempt.

Contempt, no. They are wonderful people who have always been there for me. Much like the parents of my friends for them, my co-workers, myself for mine, etc. However, many people seem to think that parenting grants magic knowledge or that having (or not having) children affects the truth value of a person's statements, and that I find amusing.

I think you are confusing experience with "magical knowledge".  Would you agree that for instance a zoo keeper making statements regarding the care and feeding of zoo animals opinion is more valid on that subject than that of someone who has never had even a pet?


Personally, I wouldn't, necessarily. I know a woman who runs a "bird rehab". Her birds are obviously atrociously cared-for. I've never had a kestrel, but I know how to tell one is not well taken care of.

So, keeping the metaphor going, some zookeepers don't know what they're doing. Some zookeepers get eaten by lions, and then even people who have never had a pet can rightly say "Wow, that guy was a bad zookeeper."
2013-09-17 08:00:57 AM
1 votes:

Cozret: I'm always impressed at how proud parents are of having accomplished tasks that the major of organisms on the planet accomplish.


That's what I don't get.

Every cluster of cells crawling on Earth has figured out how to make more clusters. Being a parent only means you are as smart as a trilobite.
2013-09-17 08:00:25 AM
1 votes:

Mr. Coffee Nerves: I think the good parents hate the "Don't you dare give me a dirty look because I'm letting my five-year-old and my three-year-old chug Mountain Dew and play 'Scream Tag' in the aisles at this 10PM showing of 'I Spit On Your Grave'"-type parents more than the non-parents hate them.


I think you greatly underestimate how much I hate them.
2013-09-17 07:59:03 AM
1 votes:

Falstaff: Cozret: marsoft: Sounds like you really hold your parents in contempt.

Contempt, no. They are wonderful people who have always been there for me. Much like the parents of my friends for them, my co-workers, myself for mine, etc. However, many people seem to think that parenting grants magic knowledge or that having (or not having) children affects the truth value of a person's statements, and that I find amusing.

Speaking from my own limited experience here - If it grants you anything beyond stress and sleepless nights, parenting grants you heightened sympathy/empathy for what other parents are going through.  You may not know that guy next to you, and he may not know you.  You both have, however, been screamed at for a few months by someone who can barely communicate back to you, have been worried the first time the little one got sick, wondered if you are doing it right, have been urinated on, etc.


Don't need to be a parent for that, dude.
2013-09-17 07:50:48 AM
1 votes:

ninotchka: earthwirm: Mugato: I have a niece and nephew I take out sometimes and I've never had any problems with their throwing a tantrum or acting up. Take some parenting classes, get a nanny or go to the nearest PetSmart and buy a muzzle. Failing all of that, don't get all indignant when someone expresses annoyance at your shrieking spawn.No one should yell at you or anything but don't get all uppity if someone's natural reaction is to look annoyed in your direction.

Wow, you sound like a parenting expert.

I should hire you as my nanny since you are such an expert. I have 4 children and 3 are boys. Three of them are easy going. I get compliments everywhere I go with them. One is more difficult. He is stubborn and harder to control. He will break you.


Gawd, you are a stupid parent.  Just read a book, and raise them all exactly the same way with simplistic platitudes.  I mean, I don't have kids, but I babysat once for 2 hours, and the kid never once had a problem.
2013-09-17 07:50:29 AM
1 votes:

Lady J: justanothersumguy: FTA  "Parenting is the easiest thing in the world to have an opinion about, but the hardest thing in the world to do."

This

i BET rocket science is harder.


As fate would have it... I am an Aerospace engineer.  a.k.a....
2013-09-17 07:49:33 AM
1 votes:
I love how parents have come to think that ignoring a temper tantrum is the proper course of action to take, ESPECIALLY in public.
2013-09-17 07:48:09 AM
1 votes:

Xanlexian: Congratulations on having a penis squirt inside of you!!  Woohoo!!!  god's little miracle.


http://www.theonion.com/articles/miracle-of-birth-occurs-for-83-bill io nth-time,775/
2013-09-17 07:47:21 AM
1 votes:
You don't have to be a good singer to know when someone is bombing a song. Similarly, I don't have to be a parent to know when someone is bad at it. I find it weird how someone becomes a parent and suddenly they're grafted with all this knowledge the childless obviously could never know, right? All those parents that claim to be above opinions and criticism forget that everyone the biggest idiots seems to be able to keep their children alive and by virtue of the fact that we all figure out parenting as an instinct (or we'd die out), they aren't really much more knowledgeable than the rest of us.

If a child throws a tantrum in public, you just need to look up at the shiatty, effete parents. That all being said, the large majority of parents and children aren't the problem.
2013-09-17 07:45:15 AM
1 votes:

abhorrent1: How about you parents quit expecting everyone to change the way they live to accommodate your little farking brat?

Oh. You don't like what's on TV because your snowflake may see it? Here's a news flash: You TV has a power button!


You beat the hell out of that straw man. What are you, some kind of ninja?
2013-09-17 07:44:06 AM
1 votes:

flucto: At a nice restaurant, say Red Lobster or Olive Garden?


(-_-)
2013-09-17 07:43:27 AM
1 votes:
Congratulations on having a penis squirt inside of you!!  Woohoo!!!  god's little miracle.
2013-09-17 07:41:58 AM
1 votes:

Cozret: I'm always impressed at how proud parents are of having accomplished tasks that the major of organisms on the planet accomplish.


Like knowing what majority means?
2013-09-17 07:34:51 AM
1 votes:
5k responses?  Jesus.

I don't know who this guy is but three cheers for the Christian breeder right, I guess.
2013-09-17 07:32:18 AM
1 votes:

jayhawk88: Falstaff: As a new father of twin girls, feel free to express any opinion you want.  I may laugh, I may tell you off.  Either way, we'll be good.

Do NOT, however, just walk up and start rubbing their cheek or stroking their hair.  I just about knocked a woman out last night for doing that.  Didn't say two words to me, just walks up and starts rubbing my youngest's head.  Creepy as hell.

The twins in public thing is one of the weirdest phenomenon ever. I can't say we ever had a "strangers touching" problem, but just everywhere, everyone has to know "do they run in your family" or "are they identical". It does lessen the older they get, though.


Maybe you guys can answer this. Do you dress your twins in identical outfits, if so, why? Is there a twin discount like buy one get one half off or something? And wouldn't that cause identity issues? Anyway, it's creepy, reminds me of The Shining.
2013-09-17 07:29:24 AM
1 votes:
I guess this is the thread where inconsiderate parents justify being inconsiderate.
2013-09-17 07:27:51 AM
1 votes:

GoldSpider: Something tells me that many of these parents who want you to "just deal with" their shrieking crotchfruit have a slightly different opinion on second-hand smoke.


Yes, because children cause cancer.
2013-09-17 07:26:22 AM
1 votes:
i1025.photobucket.com
2013-09-17 07:24:18 AM
1 votes:
Keep your filthy crotchfruit at home.
2013-09-17 07:21:55 AM
1 votes:
How about you parents quit expecting everyone to change the way they live to accommodate your little farking brat?

Oh. You don't like what's on TV because your snowflake may see it? Here's a news flash: You TV has a power button!
2013-09-17 07:18:21 AM
1 votes:
For the most part, most kids aren't that annoying, but there are that select few that you want to throttle with your bare hands, damned the consequences.
2013-09-17 07:15:29 AM
1 votes:
I have a niece and nephew I take out sometimes and I've never had any problems with their throwing a tantrum or acting up. Take some parenting classes, get a nanny or go to the nearest PetSmart and buy a muzzle. Failing all of that, don't get all indignant when someone expresses annoyance at your shrieking spawn.No one should yell at you or anything but don't get all uppity if someone's natural reaction is to look annoyed in your direction.
2013-09-17 07:13:59 AM
1 votes:

smoky2010: If I have to tolerate your moronic offspring, then you have to tolerate my opinion

/if you don't like it, too bad


You sound like a moronic offspring...

Too bad.
2013-09-17 07:13:03 AM
1 votes:
There's enough to share.

teenthropologist.files.wordpress.com
2013-09-17 07:12:55 AM
1 votes:

earthwirm: Lady J: if i have to listen to your screeching brat on the bus, i get to have an opinion

Actually, no you don't. Deal with it.


That's just a flat out lie. I get to have an opinion on anything. Now, the idea that a person doesn't get to express their opinion because you don't think it's justified or morally acceptable or whatever is fine, but I'm fairly sure that telling them their opinion is flat-out not allowed to exist is, at the very least, dickish.
2013-09-17 07:12:41 AM
1 votes:
If I have to tolerate your moronic offspring, then you have to tolerate my opinion

/if you don't like it, too bad
2013-09-17 07:11:46 AM
1 votes:
Maybe they'll make nice rooms for people with no kids to go and sit in places they can be (relatively) sure they won't have to hear children crying? I dunno. The blog post seems to be responding to a petty asshole by being a sanctimonious asshole.
 
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