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(The Atlantic)   Facebook leads to human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together, MASS HYSTERIA   (theatlantic.com) divider line 59
    More: Obvious, human sacrifice, Facebook, Danvers, Mechanicsburg, mass hysterias  
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4709 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Sep 2013 at 1:33 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-09-12 12:45:41 PM
graphics8.nytimes.com
 
2013-09-12 01:37:53 PM
FTFA: About two dozen teenagers at the Essex Agricultural and Technical School began having "mysterious" hiccups and vocal tics.

Someone needs to introduce these poor highschool girls to the traditional Victorian cure for hysteria.
 
2013-09-12 01:39:33 PM
Elegy:

Someone needs to introduce these poor highschool girls to the traditional Victorian cure for hysteria.

I volunteer.

And BTW, no one calls me "Dickless."
 
2013-09-12 01:43:29 PM
beldar.blogs.com
 
2013-09-12 01:43:43 PM
E: Why the big secret? People are smart. They can handle it.

K: A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it.
 
2013-09-12 01:46:28 PM
So Facebook is like the Politics tab, but with a billion people.  Niiiiiice.
 
2013-09-12 01:48:06 PM

axeeugene: Elegy:

Someone needs to introduce these poor highschool girls to the traditional Victorian cure for hysteria.

I volunteer.

And BTW, no one calls me "Dickless."


That's what I heard!
 
2013-09-12 01:48:32 PM
It's true.  Subby has no dick.
 
2013-09-12 01:49:42 PM
"Making a comeback".

Dude, mass hysteria went no where.

Or he must not have lived through the D&D = satanism scare.

Or rainbow parties (though this might be a facebook/myspace timeframe)
 
2013-09-12 01:51:06 PM
FTFA: Typically, mass hysteria is confined to a group of girls or young women who share a common physical space for a majority of the time. Bartholomew has studied over 600 cases, dating back to 1566, and said that the gender link is undeniable; it's just a question of why.

Speaking of shared psychological disorders, does this remind anyone of when women's menstrual cycles synch up?

/I honestly believe many "symptoms" of PMS are psycho-symatic.
//Or just being a biatch because they can get away with it.  You know, whatever.
 
2013-09-12 01:51:28 PM
Also, just take a look at Windmill sickness and those idiots that think Wi-Fi is poisoning them.

Morons, the lot of them.

Luckily, we've found a cure for windmill sickness.

Cold hard cash.
 
2013-09-12 01:51:44 PM
i970.photobucket.com
 
2013-09-12 01:52:28 PM

mike_d85: /I honestly believe many "symptoms" of PMS are psycho-symatic.


you've never lived with a female, have you
 
2013-09-12 01:55:42 PM
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-09-12 01:56:28 PM

pute kisses like a man: [beldar.blogs.com image 500x252]


Good to see have that angle covered...

www.metalinsider.net

/ Oh can you feel it? Do you believe it?
 
2013-09-12 01:57:09 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: mike_d85: /I honestly believe many "symptoms" of PMS are psycho-symatic.

you've never lived with a female, have you


Men have hormonal cycles too, and I've wondered if they don't synchronize with the women they live with.

I get pissy for no apparent reason around that time.  My wife can be an angel, but I'm just pissed off and grumpy for no reason.
 
2013-09-12 01:57:46 PM
WTF did I just read?
 
2013-09-12 01:58:15 PM
something something Belgian Coke incident
 
2013-09-12 01:58:48 PM

TheSource: WTF did I just read?


Women be cray cray
 
2013-09-12 01:59:13 PM

meat0918: The All-Powerful Atheismo: mike_d85: /I honestly believe many "symptoms" of PMS are psycho-symatic.

you've never lived with a female, have you

Men have hormonal cycles too, and I've wondered if they don't synchronize with the women they live with.


Probably not, considering the "fact" that women's menstrual cycles synchronize is not well established and is tenuous at best.
 
2013-09-12 02:02:33 PM
It also causes you to hear voices.

fc02.deviantart.net
 
2013-09-12 02:03:31 PM

meat0918: TheSource: WTF did I just read?

Women be cray cray


This. Women are biologically more likely to believe stupid shiat and delude themselves. Men, on the other hand, don't suffer from crazy psychosomatic things like this. Now, if you will excuse me, I need to go hunt for the witch that stole my penis.
 
2013-09-12 02:04:20 PM
Nothing that a little medieval torture won't fix, I'm sure.
/will gladly volunteer my services for the comely ones.
 
2013-09-12 02:05:19 PM
Dear "Writer":
"Majorly" is not a word.
 
2013-09-12 02:06:55 PM

TheSource: WTF did I just read?


Mass hysteria..

i.ytimg.com
 
2013-09-12 02:07:23 PM
I see we've landed in the Twilight Zone.

annalisegreen.com
 
2013-09-12 02:08:42 PM
i266.photobucket.com
Since you're reading that here, it says "Free Candy" on the side of the alien cylinder.
 
2013-09-12 02:08:53 PM

Ennuipoet: [graphics8.nytimes.com image 480x307]


Came for the Twinkie, leaving satisfied.
 
2013-09-12 02:11:04 PM

mike_d85: /I honestly believe many "symptoms" of PMS are psycho-symatic.


dare you to say this to a woman during this time...

/better yet, say it as you hand her a frying pan...
 
2013-09-12 02:11:28 PM

meat0918: "Making a comeback".

Dude, mass hysteria went no where.

Or he must not have lived through the D&D = satanism scare.

Or rainbow parties (though this might be a facebook/myspace timeframe)


That isn't mass hysteria in a psychological sense. Mass hysteria, as opposed to massive public outrage/scared, creates physical symptoms which appear to be contagious. This despite there not being any external agents actually causing the symptoms in the first place.

Rainbow parties, d&d scare, human sacrifice by satanists etc didn't qualify because no-one woke up with a coloured dick/d20 dice + rulebooks/heart cut out without there being some direct, non-psychosomatic cause.
 
2013-09-12 02:11:45 PM

HailRobonia: Men, on the other hand, don't suffer from crazy psychosomatic things like this.


whatsongisinthatcommercial.com
 
2013-09-12 02:14:52 PM

mike_d85: FTFA: Typically, mass hysteria is confined to a group of girls or young women who share a common physical space for a majority of the time. Bartholomew has studied over 600 cases, dating back to 1566, and said that the gender link is undeniable; it's just a question of why.

Speaking of shared psychological disorders, does this remind anyone of when women's menstrual cycles synch up?

/I honestly believe many "symptoms" of PMS are psycho-symatic.
//Or just being a biatch because they can get away with it.  You know, whatever.


As a professor of mine once said "just because it's all in their head doesn't make it any less real (to them)"

I imagine some females consciously or unconsciously use "PMS" as a blank check.
 
2013-09-12 02:15:48 PM

DerAppie: meat0918: "Making a comeback".

Dude, mass hysteria went no where.

Or he must not have lived through the D&D = satanism scare.

Or rainbow parties (though this might be a facebook/myspace timeframe)

That isn't mass hysteria in a psychological sense. Mass hysteria, as opposed to massive public outrage/scared, creates physical symptoms which appear to be contagious. This despite there not being any external agents actually causing the symptoms in the first place.

Rainbow parties, d&d scare, human sacrifice by satanists etc didn't qualify because no-one woke up with a coloured dick/d20 dice + rulebooks/heart cut out without there being some direct, non-psychosomatic cause.


I got my moral panic crossed with Mass Hysteria.

Doh!
 
2013-09-12 02:18:25 PM

Harry Freakstorm: It also causes you to hear voices.

[fc02.deviantart.net image 850x577]


I don't know what he sounds like....so I read that in Morgan Freeman's voice instead.
 
2013-09-12 02:25:34 PM

urbangirl: Dear "Writer":
"Majorly" is not a word.


The OED would disagree with you.   It's a a term of relatively modern use, but it's in there...

majorly,  adv.
Pronunciation:  Brit. /ˈmeɪdʒəli/, U.S./ˈmeɪdʒərli/
Etymology:  <  major adj. +-ly suffix2.
  1. a. Greatly; to a major degree.
 b. colloq. (orig.  U.S.). As an intensifier, modifying an adjective: really, very.
 2. Largely, in the main.
 
2013-09-12 02:26:34 PM

MechaPyx: Harry Freakstorm: It also causes you to hear voices.

[fc02.deviantart.net image 850x577]

I don't know what he sounds like....so I read that in Morgan Freeman's voice instead.


I can't tell if you're missing out or one lucky sonofabiatch.
 
2013-09-12 02:30:07 PM
You can tell that some Jezebel readers have found that article from the tone of some of the comments.

/Oh, I'm sorry. I meant compersonts.
 
2013-09-12 02:30:57 PM

Cyclometh: Ennuipoet: [graphics8.nytimes.com image 480x307]

Came for the Twinkie, leaving satisfied.


TWSS
 
2013-09-12 02:40:08 PM

ZeroCorpse: You can tell that some Jezebel readers have found that article from the tone of some of the comments.

/Oh, I'm sorry. I meant compersonts.


Yikes. Thanks for pointing that out.

/comzerts, comzirts, or comzherts, you sexist pig
 
2013-09-12 02:48:32 PM
3. "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic."
 
2013-09-12 02:52:20 PM

meat0918: "Making a comeback".

Dude, mass hysteria went no where.

Or he must not have lived through the D&D = satanism scare.

Or rainbow parties (though this might be a facebook/myspace timeframe)


Were rainbow parties ever actually a thing? I recall talking about this in middle school (late 90s) but I don't know anyone who has actually participated. Assuming it's one of those "women want sex, just not with you" things.
 
2013-09-12 02:55:49 PM
bearcats1983:
Were rainbow parties ever actually a thing? I recall talking about this in middle school (late 90s) but I don't know anyone who has actually participated. Assuming it's one of those "women want sex, just not with you" things.

If you consider "let's make up shocking shiat to tell this nosy reporter woman and see how gullible she and other adults are" a thing, then yes, they were a thing.
 
2013-09-12 03:02:34 PM
BURN THEM!
 
2013-09-12 03:20:19 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: mike_d85: /I honestly believe many "symptoms" of PMS are psycho-symatic.

you've never lived with a female, have you


I answer you thusly: I have thrown Reeses Peanut Butter CupsTM like a hand grenade.

Fano: As a professor of mine once said "just because it's all in their head doesn't make it any less real (to them)"

I imagine some females consciously or unconsciously use "PMS" as a blank check.


I pray you are not referring to Dumbledore as "a professor of mine".
 
2013-09-12 03:23:44 PM

Elegy: FTFA: About two dozen teenagers at the Essex Agricultural and Technical School began having "mysterious" hiccups and vocal tics.

Someone needs to introduce these poor highschool girls to the traditional Victorian cure for hysteria.


First read that as "vocal tits".
 
2013-09-12 03:27:59 PM
Excuse me, Pardon me but  .  .  .  is this the way to the Pat Roberson thread?
 
2013-09-12 03:32:23 PM
Is this the thread about spiders crawling silently on your legs while you are reading this?
 
2013-09-12 05:09:05 PM
Bought Facebook stock at 19, sold it at 36. Had a massive, hysterical party. Now I have the hiccups and many twitches and tics. I'M DOOMED!
 
2013-09-12 05:12:24 PM

Marcintosh: Excuse me, Pardon me but  .  .  .  is this the way to the Pat Roberson thread?


Totally unrelated, but ever since I learned the name of the actor that was in twilight I keep exchanging Pat Robertson with Rob Patterson and it makes things hilarious.  In virtually every context.

/Because the hystaria was changed to screaming teen fan hystaria.
//Instead of fire and brimstone.
///Gay jokes are fun too.
 
2013-09-12 05:16:36 PM

Elegy: FTFA: About two dozen teenagers at the Essex Agricultural and Technical School began having "mysterious" hiccups and vocal tics.

Someone needs to introduce these poor highschool girls to the traditional Victorian cure for hysteria.


I hope you mean localized massage by a skilled practitioner, perhaps via an electric-powered device, and not complete excision of the girlygirly innards.

So anyway. I'd be interested to know what are the economic ramifications of these hormonally-mediated netborne toxic events. Are they exploited by the "helping professions" to make money, as is Gender Dysphoria? Perhaps somebody should call a school assembly to discuss and describe the problem, then deputize a horde of Crisis Counselors and send them patrolling the schools looking for anything that might be a symptom among the student body. "Janice, I notice you're not walking very well in your pumps today. Are your ankles suddenly feeling weak?"

The remedy would naturally be free Prozac for everyone, supplemented by forcible Seroquel injections for those who are also in denial, because in such cases every girl is affected whether they know it or not. ("Why are you getting upset and refusing Prozac treatment? Is this Syndrome making you paranoid and labile?") And of course we cannot rule out an environmental aspect, so the area must be quarantined while everything that these girls have come into contact with must be completely disinfected and deallergenized by tained professionals in hazmat suits. All this should be at the taxpayers' expense of course, because the public's health is a public health problem, even if men don't get it: an analogy is yeast infection, which produces few or no symptoms in men but is often carried by men from woman to woman. Men, you might be inadvertantly spreading this syndrome to your female loved ones!
 
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