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(CNN)   Remembering 9/11. Let's share our stories of where we were when we heard the news   ( cnn.com) divider line
    More: Hero, Police Commissioner Ray Kelly, Rockefeller University, Howard Hughes Medical Institute, Gary Ackerman  
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1390 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Sep 2013 at 8:17 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-09-11 08:22:29 AM  
7 votes:
Who else is going to be playing Jenga today?
2013-09-11 09:56:42 AM  
5 votes:
September- yer 11th, 2001. BASE jumping in NYC.

Bobby and I had been scoping out these tall buildings in the city for weeks, setting up our jump. The day dawned clear, cold and bright. We took the stairs to avoid attention. Must have been more than a hundred floors. Took us almost an hour to hike it to the roof. Slipped the lock on the door, and scaled the suicide fence. This was it! We were ready to go. Bobby steps around to the other side of the roof just as the screech of a nearby landing jet splits the morning. Suddenly... earthquake! I'm thinking to myself, "An earthquake in NYC?!? Well, stranger things have happened." I look around for Bobby, but i think he was smoking a doob of some nasty dank around the other side of the building. Dumb bastard was never any good at getting the seeds out. The smoke was thick, and horrible-smelling. I yelled, "Bobby, your weed sucks! I'm outta here!" and leaped over the side. Ran into a few other jumpers on the way down, but the rushing air must have blurred my vision, because I swear it looked like they didn't even have any parachutes on or nothing. Pulled my cord and floated to a nice running exit about a block and a half from the building. Bobby must have not been far behind me because a bunch of people were pointing at the sky and talking amongst their selves. I didn't wait to see. Packed up my chute on the run and hit the subway north. Got back home in Poughkeepsie and turned on the TV with the volume off. News was on. Damned if Bobby's burning roach hadn't set the top third of the building on fire! Tired and stoned, I passed out and slept clear until the next day.
2013-09-11 11:15:21 AM  
4 votes:
fc02.deviantart.net
2013-09-11 08:58:39 AM  
4 votes:
Knock knock.
Who's there?
9/11.
9/11 who?
You said you'd never forget!
2013-09-11 01:52:15 PM  
3 votes:
You're damn right I remember where I was.

North Tower. Top floor.

I heard the crash and saw the flames. I looked at my watch. I knew I would be late to my daily appointment. There was little time to spare after seeing the South tower go down. I knew what I had to do.

I ran over to the shipping area and wrapped myself in bubble wrap. They called me crazy, but there was no way I was going to miss it. I checked my watch again; 8 minutes have passed. It was going to be a close call. I went to the conference room and round-housed a white board from the stand. They tried to stop me but I wasn't hearing it, not today. Not today. Another three minutes down and I only had 15 more to spare.  I had to time this perfectly or I wouldn't make it. I had the guys counting on me and I couldn't let them down. Another round house and I take out the window. "Jump? Hah. Henderson, you know I never miss it". They all stood there, frozen, looking at me until we felt the shake. The building was going to crumble. This was the moment I was waiting for. 10 minutes left and it's now or never. "Catch you on the flip side, guys". I back flipped out of the window and threw the white board under my feet. Through acts of amazing athleticism I rode the tower to the bottom like a god damn wave. I knew my appointments were worth it. I wouldn't let anyone down today. I was going to make it. 7 minutes to go when the rubble starts to settle and I set my feet on solid ground. "And the gold metal goes to...". The IOC still hasn't gotten back to me about building luge, they were never one for vision. I took off like a bat out of hell, my strong muscular legs pumping with the force of a locomotive. I wasn't going to let them down, I wasn't. 3 minutes left and I knew I could do it. I see my destination a block away. They know nothing can stop me from getting there. I blast through the doors, pick up the pen and sign in. 1 minute left. I didn't have time to grab my bag, but it doesn't matter. I just take my shirt off anyway to let everyone bear witness to my Adonis-like physique. I sit down on the bench and tell Jim, "Give me 200 pounds". I knew I wouldn't let them down. Not these guns, not today. It only took my amazing will power and 26 minutes.
2013-09-11 10:23:19 AM  
3 votes:
fc01.deviantart.net
2013-09-11 09:34:16 AM  
3 votes:

neversubmit: Instead of sharing our stories of where we were when we heard the news, let's share what we have done about it.


Well, let's see.  I advocated strongly for the creation of the Patriot Act to protect Americans from terrorism. Whenever someone criticized it I pointed out that it has the word "Patriot" right in the name so you know it's good.  I also demanded the creation of a Department of Homeland Security to protect the homeland.  I really wanted to call it the Department of Fatherland Security, but people said it was too sexist.  I thought the TSA was definitely needed to protect us from terror because the old system could not be adjusted to prevent another 9/11 and since there hasn't been another 9/11 then clearly the TSA has worked.

Finally, I strongly advocated regime change in the Middle East to depose anyone in the Axis of Evil capable of conspiring with al-Qaeda to get us again.  I chose Saddam Hussein because I'm pretty sure guys like him and Osama bin Laden are in cahoots.  They look a lot alike.  When anyone opposed this plan, I made sure it came to fruition by reminding them of 9/11 over and over.  "Do you remember what that day felt like" I'd say.  "I'd like you to say you love Saddam to the first responders!" was another good one.  9/11 gave us so much.  You can't fail to exploit a tragedy.
2013-09-11 08:55:52 AM  
3 votes:

Rapmaster2000: On 9/11, I had a view of Logan Airport from my office window.  Never forget.


www.blogcdn.com
2013-09-11 08:47:00 AM  
3 votes:
Would you have preferred Merry 9/11?

/not subby

Maybe this will cheer you up.

I Like to Watch

I put my hand in my pocket
What do I feel
One hundred and ten stories
Of concrete and steel
I like to watch

That plane-shaped hole
Really gets me hot
But the big ball of fire
Is the money shot
I like to watch

I like to watch
The plane going in
I like to watch
The flame shooting out
People dive into the street
While I play with my meat
My steel melted
And my tower's coming down

The New York skyline
Will never be the same
But the guys who flew those planes
Had farking amazing aim
I like to watch

There must have been a reason
But I don't understand
Why they hit the Pentagon
Instead of Disneyland
I like to watch

I like to watch
The plane going in
I like to watch
The flame shooting out
It's raining broken glass
While I sit on my ass
My steel melted
And my tower's coming down

I'd almost had enough
Of watching planes explode
Until they showed it in reverse
And I had to shoot my load
I like to watch

Now my hand's all sticky
And I can't find a rag
I guess I'll have to use
The American flag
I like to watch
2013-09-11 08:40:33 AM  
3 votes:
Also:
imgs.xkcd.com
/hawt
2013-09-11 08:35:33 AM  
3 votes:
Hey guys,

i.imgur.com
2013-09-11 08:33:42 AM  
3 votes:
On 9/11, I had a view of Logan Airport from my office window.  Never forget.
2013-09-11 04:36:33 PM  
2 votes:
Reading to some school kids in Florida. After I got the call, I figured a fighter escort would keep me safe to fly back to Washington. I figured I'd let the FBI handle it -- seemed to be a criminal matter and it seemed that my job was to keep people calm and channel national compassion toward the victims. But then I got a secure call from my paranoid coworker who was hiding in his own bunker beneath Washington.  He said I wasn't safe anywhere, that even the AF couldn't protect me, that terrorists could be everywhere by the thousands and that we would have to tap every phone and collect every email in America to be sure who was safe. He said we would have to attack the world, starting that day, just to be sure, and that no one was our friend. So I changed my plans.
2013-09-11 10:13:10 AM  
2 votes:
imagemacros.files.wordpress.com
2013-09-11 09:35:28 AM  
2 votes:

neversubmit: Instead of sharing our stories of where we were when we heard the news, let's share what we have done about it.


I 'liked' it on Facebook.
2013-09-11 09:13:22 AM  
2 votes:
We all know where Hulk Hogan was...

img166.imageshack.us
2013-09-11 08:58:52 AM  
2 votes:
What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow?

You can't milk a cow for 12 years.
2013-09-11 08:53:05 AM  
2 votes:
2media.nowpublic.net
2013-09-11 08:47:07 AM  
2 votes:
Also, is this the thread where desperate narcissists tell their negligibly tangential stories about how they were almost impacted by 9/11 in their compulsive need to make the story about themselves?  I love that part.
2013-09-11 08:45:09 AM  
2 votes:
Sitting at desk of the flag factory, I came out of my office and told everyone there working they'd be working doubles from here on out until further notice. Man, those kids weren't hapy.
2013-09-11 08:26:46 AM  
2 votes:

Dinki: pinchpoint: Do we really need to do this every year?

Sorry to take you away from your busy schedule of fapping to lesbian nun bondage porn. If it is too much of an inconvenience, you could try, oh I don't know, skipping the whole thread? Last time I looked, participation in these threads was not mandatory.


And I've just found something to do today to give myself a happy 9/11.
2013-09-11 07:39:05 AM  
2 votes:

Confabulat: What happened on 9/11?


Henry Hudson discovered Manhattan Island. It's been all downhill since then.
2013-09-11 07:51:14 PM  
1 vote:
And yet, we're all OK with the TSA, NSA, DHS, and Patriot Act?
2013-09-11 04:44:21 PM  
1 vote:
Well, Esquire Magazine made the anniversary a bit awkward.

www.breitbart.com

http://www.breitbart.com/InstaBlog/2013/09/11/Esquire-Bungles-9-11-F al ling-Man-Photo
2013-09-11 04:20:12 PM  
1 vote:
Fez, Morocco.
Wandering through the Medina with my family & a guide.  Saw images of one of the towers billowing smoke.  Seriously though it was some action flick I'd never seen.  No Arabic & minimal French meant I couldn't really ask what was going on.  At lunch, we were told some of it.  Picked up a lot more at the end of the day.  Trying to listen to news in French was painful - just too fast.  Most of the info we got was from the papers the next morning.  Reading French can be done at one's own pace.
Folks were seriously sympathetic everywhere we went.  (Spent the rest of the week in Morocco & the next week in Tunisia.)
I was seriously pissed at Luftansa.  Their damned Teutonic efficiency made them the first foreign carrier allowed to fly into the states.  They were cleared the day before my flight from Frankfurt.  I could have been stuck in Frankfurt, dammit!
2013-09-11 04:03:44 PM  
1 vote:
Sitting exactly where I am right now, but facing 180 degrees in the other direction.  Damn it feels good to be a gangster.
2013-09-11 03:17:50 PM  
1 vote:
I was reading Fark.

/lurked a long time before creating account
//had to as someone posted something that was wrong
2013-09-11 02:26:14 PM  
1 vote:
Twelve years later and *still* no one has gone after those responsible:

oi44.tinypic.com
2013-09-11 02:06:09 PM  
1 vote:

HAMMERTOE: September- yer 11th, 2001. BASE jumping in NYC.


Uncle B.S., where were you on December 7th, 1941?
2013-09-11 02:03:19 PM  
1 vote:
Sadam Hussein was watching Al Jazeera thinking "phew, thank heavens this takes their focus off me!"
2013-09-11 01:42:10 PM  
1 vote:

bentley57: I was sitting exactly where I'm sitting right now.
/at work


Did you finish that TPS report yet that you were working on in 2001?
2013-09-11 01:10:40 PM  
1 vote:

Daeva: we as a country REALLY need to get over this shiat, stop putting our losses at a pedestal while being blissfully ignorant of the hundred if not thousands of times more innocent lives we have both taken and ruined, they got us once.... good for them, we have gotten them a  million times over, and most of them had nothing to do with it!!! can we PLEASE put our dick collectively back in our pants?


You mean like this?

sphotos-a-lga.xx.fbcdn.net
2013-09-11 12:56:00 PM  
1 vote:
I was in bed with my then-girlfriend getting laid.  We fell asleep and woke up around 4pm PST to hear the news.  That was the last time we had sex.  Stupid farking terrorists.
2013-09-11 12:50:21 PM  
1 vote:
Mme.Mersault 2001-09-11 09:24:35 AM
Osama.

Seeing that comment in the original 9/11 thread always makes my blood turn cold.
2013-09-11 12:41:12 PM  
1 vote:
I was in bed. The ex woke me up to tell me about it, including that nobody could get any work done after that so they'd sent everybody home.

My first reaction was something like "So the chickens came home to roost. Yankee doodle doo."

The most memorable exact quote of the day was from some dweeb who crossposted a rant to several Usenet groups bearing the headline "DEATH TO ALL ISLAMICS." And also on Usenet that day this chick I usually argued with went on about how the Bush regime would no doubt use that as an excuse to pass an Enabling Act and to drag us into war with a Muslim country country or two: it was one time I had to hope she was full of shiat though I suspected she wasn't.

Then later (the next day?) while driving to the Liquor Barn I had to pass a 9/11 Memorial in a field, into which  a humongous limpdick pickup was turning with a teenage boy in the bed waving a humongous Confederate battle flag. (Oh how "ironic.")

Golly. Won't you people ever get over it?
2013-09-11 12:33:14 PM  
1 vote:
My brother got home from his graveyard shift, and woke me because he said the one of the WTC towers was "on fire"

I watched the news, wondering what was going on, and saw the smoking tower.  Eventually they came to the "conclusion" it was a accident with a plane collision.

Then I watched the second plane hit.

I'm on the west coast in Canada, but at that moment, I was sure I knew what those at Pearl Harbor were feeling when the first bombs started falling.  By the time the Pentagon was hit, I realized that this was going to go so far out of control that unless there was a clear target of revenge, America would go stomping around the planet in a blind rage.

Little did I know that a few opportunistic bastards would use this event to further their own goals of greed and power.
2013-09-11 12:22:50 PM  
1 vote:

debug: Are we really going to keep doing this every year?


as stated many times up thread.  you are not forced to participate.  There are several other threads for you to enjoy.
2013-09-11 11:56:46 AM  
1 vote:

IronOcelot: I remember where I was when I heard the news.
I had just finished breaking in my newest Thai ladyboy in the Lovenasium when my sex-butler, Lance Hardthrust, informed me while bringing me usual lunch of absinthe and opium.


We found Rush Limbaugh's Fark handle!
2013-09-11 11:54:39 AM  
1 vote:
I remember where I was when I heard the news.
I had just finished breaking in my newest Thai ladyboy in the Lovenasium when my sex-butler, Lance Hardthrust, informed me while bringing me usual lunch of absinthe and opium.
2013-09-11 11:26:50 AM  
1 vote:

Dheiner: GoldSpider: Just curious, for how long did America collectively freak out on 12/7 after '41?

Have you at least seen pictures of Hiroshima?


I know, sick farking Germans
2013-09-11 11:17:03 AM  
1 vote:

CTZanderman: Hey guys, remember that time someone threw a rock at us so we dropped boulders on two different locations for a bunch of years and then still couldn't start to let go?  That was good times.


IN MY HOME! IN MY BEDROOM! Where my wife sleeps... and my children play with their toys.
2013-09-11 10:56:07 AM  
1 vote:

Casey Anthony: [imagemacros.files.wordpress.com image 600x403]


i758.photobucket.comi758.photobucket.com
2013-09-11 10:48:08 AM  
1 vote:

HAMMERTOE: September- yer 11th, 2001. BASE jumping in NYC.

Bobby and I had been scoping out these tall buildings in the city for weeks, setting up our jump. The day dawned clear, cold and bright. We took the stairs to avoid attention. Must have been more than a hundred floors. Took us almost an hour to hike it to the roof. Slipped the lock on the door, and scaled the suicide fence. This was it! We were ready to go. Bobby steps around to the other side of the roof just as the screech of a nearby landing jet splits the morning. Suddenly... earthquake! I'm thinking to myself, "An earthquake in NYC?!? Well, stranger things have happened." I look around for Bobby, but i think he was smoking a doob of some nasty dank around the other side of the building. Dumb bastard was never any good at getting the seeds out. The smoke was thick, and horrible-smelling. I yelled, "Bobby, your weed sucks! I'm outta here!" and leaped over the side. Ran into a few other jumpers on the way down, but the rushing air must have blurred my vision, because I swear it looked like they didn't even have any parachutes on or nothing. Pulled my cord and floated to a nice running exit about a block and a half from the building. Bobby must have not been far behind me because a bunch of people were pointing at the sky and talking amongst their selves. I didn't wait to see. Packed up my chute on the run and hit the subway north. Got back home in Poughkeepsie and turned on the TV with the volume off. News was on. Damned if Bobby's burning roach hadn't set the top third of the building on fire! Tired and stoned, I passed out and slept clear until the next day.



You win teh internets today, sir.
2013-09-11 10:18:38 AM  
1 vote:
I was dancing next to my white van in a parking lot in New Jersey.
2013-09-11 10:17:41 AM  
1 vote:
It doesn't matter what I was doing, but as I watch my students in class this morning I realize how insignificant it is to most of them. They don't think about it, or really remember it (most of them were 3-4 years old at the time), and to them it's a day where they show lots of sad people on TV and the occasional replay of video of the towers or the Pentagon, or the field in PA. We live in rural Iowa, and most of these kids have never met people from other cultures or non-Christian religious backgrounds, so I hope that their perception of people of different colors and religions hasn't been forever tainted because of something that happened when they were small.
2013-09-11 10:17:09 AM  
1 vote:
Casey Anthony:

Cute, as an encore, feel free to go play in traffic.
2013-09-11 10:10:44 AM  
1 vote:
The American police have said they will never forget 9/11. Pretty hard too, I would think, considering it's your phone number.
2013-09-11 09:58:01 AM  
1 vote:
Asleep in my dorm room, sophomore year of college. My suite-mate knocks on my door. I wake up and open it. He says, "The Twin Towers are gone".

One of the more confusing statements to hear while your brain is still trying to turn itself on.
2013-09-11 09:55:59 AM  
1 vote:
Woke up to the news while in Idaho, visiting for my wife's grandfather's funeral. It was horrible--being in Idaho, I mean. Everyone there was sure that the army base near Boise would be the terrorists' next target. Good times.
2013-09-11 09:51:54 AM  
1 vote:

Andrew Wiggin: megarian: The day after I moved to Mississippi.

lose a bet?


Pretty much.
2013-09-11 09:40:43 AM  
1 vote:
I was in NYC several blocks from the WTC preparing to depress the plunger and begin the controlled demolition.
2013-09-11 09:38:37 AM  
1 vote:
cdn.theatlanticwire.com
"What do you mean, I'm the only person who says 'Happy 9/11?'"
2013-09-11 09:34:48 AM  
1 vote:
I came back to my apartment from a gap in classes at PennState between 10am-12pm and my roommate's had the coverage on as soon as I walked in the door.

I was barely awake still from getting up for my 8am and 9am classes, but we started blasting Bombs Over Baghdad off our balcony.

Yeah we were assholes like that.
2013-09-11 09:28:03 AM  
1 vote:

KingKauff: Confabulat: What happened on 9/11?

Pete Rose broke Ty Cobb'shiat record


i240.photobucket.com
2013-09-11 09:07:03 AM  
1 vote:
I was teaching VB6 and .NET beta classes at ATA in Louisville.  The news came across first in my Everquest IRC channel from a guildmate in NYC ("I think a plane just hit a building").  I went to Fark for updates because that was the only site that was loading.  Dismissed class early.  We killed Yelinak that night.
2013-09-11 09:07:00 AM  
1 vote:

Wind Chimes: I worked in the Capitol Complex of my state that day, and I had been selected to get lunch for everyone.  (We had no TVs or radios in the section that I worked in, so while there were rumors that something had gone awry, no one really had an idea of what was going on).  My co-workers had selected McDonald's for the lunch run, so I took up orders and money and went to get the food.  My trip was without incident; however, when I arrived, no one was there.  A manager walked down the hallway and said "Didn't you hear?  We've been evacuated!  Someone has attacked the WTC and the Pentagon!"

I stood there, with all that food in hand, in shock.  I went back to my car and the police had blocked off local traffic to no one but state employees evacuating.  I had to press my state ID badge on the window of my car to get by to the interstate.  I fled to my then-boyfriend's house in a rural area of the state where I finally got to sit down and watch the news.  It was frightening.


Did you eat everyone's burgers?
2013-09-11 09:06:31 AM  
1 vote:
Hard to believe it has been 40 years.  Never forget.

richardbrenneman.files.wordpress.com
2013-09-11 09:04:22 AM  
1 vote:
Ausbro here , I was at home playing Unreal Tournament.

suddenly it was happening ~

game ruined
2013-09-11 08:57:06 AM  
1 vote:
I think the greeting for 9/11 should be "Happy 5/2"
2013-09-11 08:56:39 AM  
1 vote:

imapirate: . 'This is your captain speaking. If you look to your left there's a lovely view of the Statue of Liberty. If you look to your right, there's Stacy making some copies."


Sadly that is actually pretty funny

I miss Stacy
2013-09-11 08:52:18 AM  
1 vote:
2013-09-11 08:48:06 AM  
1 vote:
1-media-cdn.foolz.us
2013-09-11 08:47:39 AM  
1 vote:
I worked in a comedy club at the time. Tuesdays were amateur night. For some stupid reason we stayed open. One of our amateurs wanted to get out early so he told this joke (this was the actual Tuesday, 9/11/01):

"I wonder what it was like on those planes this morning. 'This is your captain speaking. If you look to your left there's a lovely view of the Statue of Liberty. If you look to your right, there's Stacy making some copies."

Room cleared faster than you could blink.
2013-09-11 08:36:44 AM  
1 vote:

FarkingReading: We are talking about Miley twerking, right?


too soon

*sobs*
2013-09-11 08:34:12 AM  
1 vote:
My 20-month-old daughter had pooped so much that I had to take her outside and hose her down.  That was a common occurrence.  I then went inside and turned on the TV a few minutes after the first plane had hit.

/she was later diagnosed with ulcerative colitis
2013-09-11 08:34:08 AM  
1 vote:
Hey guys, remember that time someone threw a rock at us so we dropped boulders on two different locations for a bunch of years and then still couldn't start to let go?  That was good times.
2013-09-11 08:30:59 AM  
1 vote:
I was asleep when my brother called and told me the news.  He was supposed to be flying to our dad's that day.  He turned on the news, saw what had happened, and thought, "Well, looks like I'm not flying anywhere today," turned off the tv and went back to bed.  Unfortunately he didn't call our dad, and all poor dad knew during those first chaotic hours was that planes were randomly flying into buildings and the ground, on a day his son was supposed to be flying to see him.  When Dad finally got hold of me and I assured him Bro was okay, he said, "Tell your brother I love him, and I'm gonna kill him for not calling me."
2013-09-11 08:25:38 AM  
1 vote:

pinchpoint: Do we really need to do this every year?


Sorry to take you away from your busy schedule of fapping to lesbian nun bondage porn. If it is too much of an inconvenience, you could try, oh I don't know, skipping the whole thread? Last time I looked, participation in these threads was not mandatory.
2013-09-11 08:22:49 AM  
1 vote:
About an hour after the towers got hit, the idiot landscaper ran over the cable box for half of the apartment complex. No tv, no phone, no internet. Had to drive to the grocery store to find out my neighborhood wasn't actually being invaded. Felt dumb afterwards though.
2013-09-11 08:20:40 AM  
1 vote:

Confabulat: What happened on 9/11?


Pete Rose broke Ty Cobb'shiat record
2013-09-11 08:19:17 AM  
1 vote:
Do we really need to do this every year?
2013-09-11 08:01:42 AM  
1 vote:
I don't know exactly where I was when I heard the News but I was happy to know it was now hip to be square.
2013-09-11 07:19:24 AM  
1 vote:

Confabulat: What happened on 9/11?


That's Spiro Agnew's birthday.
 
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