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(Medium)   "Dear guy who just made my burrito, this is why we'll always have minimum wage jobs"   (medium.com) divider line 335
    More: Fail, minimum wages  
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34359 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Sep 2013 at 5:49 PM (50 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-09-09 06:04:56 PM

Fart_Machine: Did anyone bother to get to the end of the rant where the guy says he was trying to be funny and this is in no way to be taken seriously?


Yes, except it was bullshiat and a cop out to avoid having to deal with any conflict from the post
 
2013-09-09 06:05:00 PM
Entitlement guy sounds fat.
 
2013-09-09 06:05:39 PM
Did he ever consider that he was such an asshole it was done to him on purpose?
 
2013-09-09 06:05:40 PM
Too many f-bombs.  I'm no prude and can swear up a storm with the best of them and love my f word. But instead of having a little fun with this rant, he turns it into an obnoxious string of "F this, that and the other."
 
2013-09-09 06:05:42 PM

Fart_Machine: Also, it is meant to be a work of humor. If you take from this that a human being really got as angry about a burrito as the post suggests, please never introduce me to the human beings you know.


Yeah, I also saw the disclaimer. However, having been one to write rants like these (in private emails, mind, you) it's clear that his experience was real so he's writing from fact rather than just making stuff up. I thought it was pretty funny, mind you, but the disclaimer wants me to say tpo the guy hey, you can't have your farkin' burrito and eat it, too. You were angry. Just let it out, man!
 
2013-09-09 06:06:02 PM

zenferret: I'm feelin' his pain.
[i39.tinypic.com image 850x637]


Arby's is EASILY the most egregious violator in the way their product looks in advertisements vs. reality.

Big Beef and Cheddar looks like it stands about 7" tall smothered in a cheesy waterfall...

The reality is one squirt of cheese off center and already soaked in to the bread while the rest of the sandwich is flat enough to slide under a closed door.
 
2013-09-09 06:06:44 PM

NutWrench: I never thought it would be possible to screw up a burrito like that.

 
2013-09-09 06:06:46 PM
What no Chipotle burrito ever has looked like:

abcnews.go.com

/First world problems, but I feel his "pain"
 
2013-09-09 06:07:11 PM

LoneWolf343: If you pay someone $7.25 an hour, expect a $7.25/hr job.


Minus taxes, commute costs, and other assorted bullshiat...more like five an hour, no benefits.
 
2013-09-09 06:07:14 PM
And remember when eating a taco you tilt your head not the taco.
 
2013-09-09 06:07:23 PM
Does Maddox have an angry cousin he's never mentioned?
 
2013-09-09 06:08:36 PM

2BuckChuck: What no Chipotle burrito ever has looked like:

[abcnews.go.com image 478x269]

/First world problems, but I feel his "pain"


They make it in front of you so there really is no excuse.
 
2013-09-09 06:08:53 PM
I found it amusing. I agree that the ideal burrito has the ingredients evenly distributed; but there was a teenage ahead of me in line at Chipotle the other day who specifically asked that the ingredients be mixed and I couldn't help but think he was a spoiled little d-bag/diva. Man up. Sometimes life gives you a mouthful of something that would be delicious if it were eaten in a smaller proportion along with something else. Just try to hang on for the ride. Also, if you want everything cheap, fresh, delicious, and instantly, something has got to suffer. Things made on assemply lines don't get the same attention to detail you'd expect from an artisan.
 
2013-09-09 06:09:00 PM
 
2013-09-09 06:09:13 PM

zenferret: I'm feelin' his pain.
[i39.tinypic.com image 850x637]


That is one horrid looking vagina....
 
2013-09-09 06:09:26 PM
They just opened a new burrito joint near my apartment. I was pretty excited, but all the guys working there are Filipino.

I love Filipinos. Seriously. But their burrito skills are sub par.
 
2013-09-09 06:09:31 PM

xalres: Actually, I'd be impressed if someone were able to make a burrito layered like that without the ingredients being swirled together in the process. It made me think of an interesting idea, make a vertically layered burrito but with different burritos. So you could get, say, an asada/chile verde/pastor burrito. They'd need to find a way to separate them, some kind of edible semi-permeable membrane to keep the flavor sections separated. Someone with more time and less of a procrastinative* streak needs to make this happen.

*is that a word


Top stoner scientists are working on it night and day.
 
2013-09-09 06:09:40 PM

Chariset: cameroncrazy1984: Now I just kind of want to go to Moe's.

I haven't been to Freebird's in far too long.


I used to go regularly when I was at Texas A&M, but not since.  They finally built one here early this year, and after driving past a couple of times and going elsewhere because of the crowds, I finally went one day and looked at the menu.  Everything cost so much more than I remembered; it was going to be at least 10 bucks for just me.  Nostalgia lost out.

I went to the mom and pop chinese place instead.
 
2013-09-09 06:09:48 PM
Anybody who eats a burrito, deserves what he gets. Third world foods just don't work for me. And I've tried. Been to highly praised Mexican joint in NYC and it was like, no, this isn't working for me. Give me a good old cheeseburger and fries, thanks.
 
2013-09-09 06:10:08 PM
Silly rant or not, the author got what they wanted : blog traffic...
 
2013-09-09 06:10:58 PM
So it has been 20 plus years since I have worked in fast food but when I did, I had no choice in how the food was made, you put a certain amount of pickles on, you put a certain amount ketchup on and in a certain way, onions were cut a certain way and in a certain thickness, this idiot blogger gives the fast food worker too much credit. He assumes the guy is doing it on purpose. More than likely the fast food worker is doing it because that is the way he is told to make a burrito. When I worked in fast food, I was in high school. I didn't want to think after school, I wanted a paycheck.
 
2013-09-09 06:11:08 PM
A coworker was dying to share this with me last week. I got about halfway through before I stopped reading. Using fark for every other word and capitalizing more often than not is a real turnoff, and I just couldn't muster a bit of sympathy over a silly burrito.

But this is why we'll always have bloggers: self importance and narcissism inflates the seriousness of mundane things and the criticality to get the word out about it. I guess there's an element of being a victim in this case as well.
 
2013-09-09 06:11:57 PM

Smackledorfer: vygramul: If you want someone capable of making a burrito, pay more than minimum wage.

Yup. You get what you pay for.  I'd happily pay an extra 50 cents to get it rolled right.

cannotsuggestaname: first world problems

Maybe, but I would wager people in the third world also prefer their food properly prepared, and complain about it accordingly.





Yes you do get what you pay for. Kids up here get $10.25 an hour minimum (plus tips) wage. I feel somewhat justified in complaining. If the person making my food was paid less I'd probably keep my trap shut.
 
2013-09-09 06:12:36 PM

SlothB77: this guy sounds like he is:

A) Fat
and
B) Doesn't really have much important going on in his life
and has
C) Anger issues

get over it, dude.  it was a horrible burrito.  mix it up with a fork and enjoy.


Maybe he was just trying to be funny, and really isn't that angry about his burrito.
 
2013-09-09 06:13:08 PM

billybobtoo: Been to highly praised Mexican joint in NYC


Well, buddy, I've had "New York style" pizza from a highly praised pizza place here in Texas. You think I got anything resembling a real New York pizza? Hell, no. You're too far from the source.
 
2013-09-09 06:13:26 PM

KresentPhresh: button


Actually it opens in a new window, so the back button is moot by default.
 
2013-09-09 06:13:45 PM

redsquid: xalres: Actually, I'd be impressed if someone were able to make a burrito layered like that without the ingredients being swirled together in the process. It made me think of an interesting idea, make a vertically layered burrito but with different burritos. So you could get, say, an asada/chile verde/pastor burrito. They'd need to find a way to separate them, some kind of edible semi-permeable membrane to keep the flavor sections separated. Someone with more time and less of a procrastinative* streak needs to make this happen.

*is that a word

Top stoner scientists are working on it night and day.


Reading through that again, it really does look like a stoner wrote it.
 
2013-09-09 06:13:50 PM
Funny. Not real. But funny.
 
2013-09-09 06:13:53 PM

KresentPhresh: I hope your babies look like monkeys.


occupationoforegon.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-09-09 06:14:23 PM

ThatDarkFellow: Fart_Machine: Did anyone bother to get to the end of the rant where the guy says he was trying to be funny and this is in no way to be taken seriously?

Yes, except it was bullshiat and a cop out to avoid having to deal with any conflict from the post


Meh, it read to me like the guy was pulling a shtick.
 
2013-09-09 06:14:31 PM
I'm sorry but that burrito has a bunch of bullshiat that is just filler.
Shell, meat, onion, cheese and cilantro and that's it. You pour your own farking salsa(I like green) on and in it.
/If you're in Chicago try this place http://www.pasadita.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id= 5 &Itemid=2
 
2013-09-09 06:14:36 PM

The Briny Derp: Sour cream ratio is to high people as bond yield ratio is to investors.

 
2013-09-09 06:14:55 PM

uncleacid: And remember when eating a taco you tilt your head not the taco.


Truer words could not be spoken.
 
2013-09-09 06:15:00 PM

redsquid: xalres: Actually, I'd be impressed if someone were able to make a burrito layered like that without the ingredients being swirled together in the process. It made me think of an interesting idea, make a vertically layered burrito but with different burritos. So you could get, say, an asada/chile verde/pastor burrito. They'd need to find a way to separate them, some kind of edible semi-permeable membrane to keep the flavor sections separated. Someone with more time and less of a procrastinative* streak needs to make this happen.

*is that a word

Top stoner scientists are working on it night and day.


I know! They could use a tortilla!
 
2013-09-09 06:15:50 PM
Protip:  swearing doesn't actually make you funny.
 
2013-09-09 06:15:56 PM

Ishidan: LoneWolf343: If you pay someone $7.25 an hour, expect a $7.25/hr job.

Minus taxes, commute costs, and other assorted bullshiat...more like five an hour, no benefits.


Paying the incompetent more isn't suddenly going to make them competent.
 
2013-09-09 06:16:02 PM
mock anger is no substitute for real anger.
 
2013-09-09 06:16:38 PM

drjekel_mrhyde: I'm sorry but that burrito has a bunch of bullshiat that is just filler.
Shell, meat, onion, cheese and cilantro and that's it. You pour your own farking salsa(I like green) on and in it.
/If you're in Chicago try this place http://www.pasadita.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id= 5 &Itemid=2


The place is so farking good it has 3 stores on one farking block
 
2013-09-09 06:17:06 PM
Burritos are cheap and easy to make.  Which is why Senor Douchebag is going to a fast food joint for one.
 
2013-09-09 06:17:07 PM
If you're from California, try this place: "_____berto's"
 
2013-09-09 06:17:44 PM
did all of you miss the disclaimer at the bottom that this is a joke?
 
2013-09-09 06:17:59 PM
The McDonalds close to my house is always a crapshoot.
 
2013-09-09 06:18:08 PM

Fart_Machine: ThatDarkFellow: Fart_Machine: Did anyone bother to get to the end of the rant where the guy says he was trying to be funny and this is in no way to be taken seriously?

Yes, except it was bullshiat and a cop out to avoid having to deal with any conflict from the post

Meh, it read to me like the guy was pulling a shtick.


Then the guy is somehow worse than the writers at Kotaku
 
2013-09-09 06:18:17 PM
So, yeah. This was either borrowed or outright stolen.

http://veryjosie.blogspot.com/2012/10/worst-burrito-ever.html

Note the date. And it pops up elsewhere all over the interwebs.
 
2013-09-09 06:18:17 PM
I prefer my burrito to be served open faced by a guy named Concepcion who does not speak English very well.
sustainabledad.com
 
2013-09-09 06:18:45 PM
Wow, what a prick.  A prick that eats dongs and drinks pure ejaculate from the rarest of cows hand-fed by organically grown indigenous virgins.
 
2013-09-09 06:19:00 PM
Lulz copy pasta...

Also, it is meant to be a work of humor. If you take from this that a human being really got as angry about a burrito as the post suggests, please never introduce me to the human beings you know.
Further ReadingHow to control your anger-
Anger and your health Anger is a normal, healthy emotion. But managing anger can be a problem for many people who find it difficult to ke...
 
2013-09-09 06:19:16 PM
The blogger's mistake is thinking the guy that made his burrito cares.
 
2013-09-09 06:20:25 PM

69gnarkill69: I prefer my burrito to be served open faced by a guy named Concepcion who does not speak English very well.
[sustainabledad.com image 850x566]


Holy balls that looks awesome!
 
2013-09-09 06:21:04 PM

jayfurr: As angry pointless online rants go, this one is pretty good.


I laughed several time. The mental image of a person trying to bite down on a burrito lengthwise and the gut-shot burrito comment especially made me laugh. And while we're on the subject of poorly made Tex-mex: the hard taco is a failure of engineering. Soft tacos are great, but hard tacos are bullshiat. I have only one option when eating a hard taco; tilt my head to 90 degrees and hope for the best. fark all the noise, I don't eat like a nursing calf.
 
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