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(Daily Star)   Beer. It's awesome. But it can do THIS to you   (dailystar.co.uk) divider line 72
    More: Scary, hiccups, insomnias  
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22756 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Sep 2013 at 9:32 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-09-05 08:35:30 AM
robsbeercans.com

That's what you get for drinking the cheap stuff.
 
2013-09-05 09:33:28 AM
UFIA

....just saying
 
2013-09-05 09:34:03 AM
Did he try holding his breath?
 
2013-09-05 09:34:46 AM
*hiccup* kill me *hiccup* kill me *hiccup* kill me
 
2013-09-05 09:35:54 AM
Is he about to do a teaspoon of coke? What a strange photo...
 
2013-09-05 09:37:00 AM
1) A tablespoon of vinegar works on me every time
2) Loudly slapping a dollar on a table in front of someone and saying "I'll give you $1 if you hiccup again" works pretty well on another person. Only works the first time though
 
2013-09-05 09:37:44 AM
replygif.net
 
2013-09-05 09:37:57 AM
Stag do??? I've heard of "stag party" or simply "stag", but I've never heard of adding "do" to this.
 
2013-09-05 09:38:00 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-09-05 09:38:56 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-09-05 09:39:51 AM
The headline though is even better if you read it in this guy's voice:

filmdope.com
 
2013-09-05 09:39:53 AM
He should try drinking himself into a stupor again. His body should reset itself and come out normal.
 
2013-09-05 09:42:52 AM
I read recently that beer and pussy have similar pH. The upshot was that if you like the taste of one ...

I note that Mrs. 'saur enjoys a beer from time to time. Hmmm.
 
2013-09-05 09:52:09 AM
Daniel Clavin woke up with hiccups
www.harehillhounds.com

He should have asked his uncle Cliff for some advice. I'm sure the ancient Mayans had a remedy that he would be happy to share.
 
2013-09-05 09:53:31 AM
He lives in County Roscommon.  The wild west of Ireland.  Probably no good doctors out that way.
 
2013-09-05 09:55:51 AM
So here is my hiccup story, which is not as bad as this guy but still worth telling.

One day about 20 years ago I decided to have some Johnsonville brats for dinner.  They were greasy and glorious.  I enjoyed every minute of eating them.  But they made my stomach acidy and, as sometimes happens, I got hiccups.

Usually I can take an antacid and there is no problem but this time the hiccups persisted.  Two or three times a minute, *hic*.  This went on.  And on.  And on.  For hours.

By about 4:00am I was still awake.  My back was wracked with pain and I was exhausted.  I tried remedies like drinking water from the odd side of the glass and nothing worked.  I decided to call the on-call doctor for advice.

He told me to do exactly what the guy in the picture on the article did; eat a spoonful of sugar.  I did that a few times and the hiccups would not abate.

I was getting desperate.  I wanted to see a doctor.  So I went to the ER.

The ER was pretty quiet at this time of night when I got there.  When the admin asked me what I was there for I said "I have hiccups" and she looked at me like I was a nutball.  Then I added "They have been going on for hours and hours." and she smiled and understood.

I got to see a doctor fairly quickly and told me his story.  He was a bit confused as to what to do and he (and I swear this is the truth) had to look it up in a large hardbound book.  He read something and then said "Ah!".  You could almost see the lightbulb over his head.

He asked me if I had anyone to drive me home and I said that I did.  Then he said he'd be back in a minute.

When he returned he had a large syringe and told me to drop my drawers.  I got an injection in one butt-cheek and the hiccups stopped within a few minutes.  I asked him what it was and he said it was thorazine.

Thorazine is a severe muscle relaxant.  It is what they use to control raging mental patients to get them to stop moving.

It stopped my hiccups in their tracks.  It also gained the attention of the rest of the muscles in my body.

My (then) wife drove me home and it was all that we could do to get me up the stairs and into the bedroom.  I fell asleep pretty easily, but the next morning when I woke up I was so lethargic that I was unable to even stand up straight long enough to take a shower.  I was wide awake but my body just didn't want to DO anything.

But the hiccups were gone.  So I was happy.
 
2013-09-05 09:55:59 AM
Let's not jump to conclusions. Maybe he caught it from that deer he had sex with.
 
2013-09-05 10:01:46 AM

abfalter:   I tried remedies like drinking water from the odd side of the glass


I'm having trouble picturing what you're saying. What is the odd side of a glass?
 
2013-09-05 10:03:04 AM
Give him weed.  It's been shown to deal with diaphragm spasms of that sort.

Raw jalapenos often give me violent hiccups.
 
2013-09-05 10:13:30 AM

Pangit: abfalter:   I tried remedies like drinking water from the odd side of the glass

I'm having trouble picturing what you're saying. What is the odd side of a glass?


Imagine a glass is sitting in front of you on a table, and next to it is a compass. South is the part of the glass that's closest to you. West is to your left, East is to your right.

Drink from the north edge of the glass.
 
2013-09-05 10:18:05 AM
dafuq is a boozy stag do?
 
2013-09-05 10:20:36 AM
FTA: He is also forced to spend many a sleepless night in the spare room so long-suffering wife Susan, 38, can get some sleep.

Oh, the wife is suffering? How terrible it must be for her to have to sleep while he hiccups all night.

Also,  Wellon Dowd,I'd forgotten about that photo set. Thanks for the reminder!
 
2013-09-05 10:21:12 AM

abfalter: Thorazine is a severe muscle relaxant. It is what they use to control raging mental patients to get them to stop moving.

It stopped my hiccups in their tracks. It also gained the attention of the rest of the muscles in my body.


Zombie Eater: Give him weed. It's been shown to deal with diaphragm spasms of that sort.


Cannabis and Thorazine. Making a mental note of that.

Hiccups are bad for ten minutes, I don't want them going on for hours.
 
2013-09-05 10:21:32 AM
Digital rectal massage
 
2013-09-05 10:22:24 AM
On one of the early seasons of ER, a guy came in with the hiccups. It turned out he had AIDS.

Better safe than sorry, dude.
 
2013-09-05 10:22:31 AM

abfalter: Thorazine is a severe muscle relaxant.  It is what they use to control raging mental patients to get them to stop moving.



I wouldn't have thought of that, but it's really sort of brilliant. So long as you didn't have anywhere to be, at least.
 
2013-09-05 10:25:42 AM
Gonz:

Drink from the north edge of the glass.

*Rotates glass 180 degrees, drinks*

*Hic*

Nope, nothing.
 
2013-09-05 10:26:38 AM

Gonz: Pangit: abfalter:   I tried remedies like drinking water from the odd side of the glass

I'm having trouble picturing what you're saying. What is the odd side of a glass?

Imagine a glass is sitting in front of you on a table, and next to it is a compass. South is the part of the glass that's closest to you. West is to your left, East is to your right.

Drink from the north edge of the glass.


I am fairly sure that is just a "cure" for the boredom of whoever told you to try it.

/Yes I have tried it when I had really bad hiccups once.
//Once.
 
2013-09-05 10:27:18 AM
Daily Star can add not removing red eye to their already long list of Fail.
 
2013-09-05 10:30:04 AM
androidtalk.co.uk
 
2013-09-05 10:30:24 AM

Dazrin: Gonz: Pangit: abfalter:   I tried remedies like drinking water from the odd side of the glass

I'm having trouble picturing what you're saying. What is the odd side of a glass?

Imagine a glass is sitting in front of you on a table, and next to it is a compass. South is the part of the glass that's closest to you. West is to your left, East is to your right.

Drink from the north edge of the glass.

I am fairly sure that is just a "cure" for the boredom of whoever told you to try it.

/Yes I have tried it when I had really bad hiccups once.
//Once.


Didn't say it worked, just explaining the concept.

You know what I find cures hiccups? Whiskey.
 
2013-09-05 10:34:15 AM

Pangit: abfalter:   I tried remedies like drinking water from the odd side of the glass

I'm having trouble picturing what you're saying. What is the odd side of a glass?


The opposite side of the glass is what I should have said.
 
2013-09-05 10:40:16 AM

abfalter: Pangit: abfalter:   I tried remedies like drinking water from the odd side of the glass

I'm having trouble picturing what you're saying. What is the odd side of a glass?

The opposite side of the glass is what I should have said.



picayune.uclick.com
 
2013-09-05 10:42:07 AM
mcgarnagle.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-09-05 10:45:10 AM
Some how, I do not equate the term Booze with Beer as much as I do Liqueur. For that, FAIL on the headline.
It really just wasn't that good.
 
2013-09-05 10:57:04 AM
When my kids get hiccups, I tickle them mercilessly for around 30 seconds. Works EVERY time, although on rare occasions I have to do it twice for it to work.
 
2013-09-05 10:57:35 AM
christ the Star is worse than the Fail, and that's saying something
 
2013-09-05 10:57:49 AM
No, it can't.
 
2013-09-05 11:00:26 AM
abfalter:
When he returned he had a large syringe and told me to drop my drawers.  I got an injection in one butt-cheek and the hiccups stopped within a few minutes.  I asked him what it was and he said it was thorazine.

Thorazine is a severe muscle relaxant.  It is what they use to control raging mental patients to get them to stop moving.


So the doctor injected you with an unknown substance without telling you what the effects would be?  I call BS.
 
2013-09-05 11:02:43 AM

wurdjunky: When my kids get hiccups, I tickle them mercilessly for around 30 seconds. Works EVERY time, although on rare occasions I have to do it twice for it to work.


So not EVERY time then?
 
2013-09-05 11:06:12 AM

wurdjunky: When my kids get hiccups, I tickle them mercilessly for around 30 seconds


That's only OK if you know the kids, though. Trust me.
 
2013-09-05 11:08:41 AM
Here's what else it can do to you.
i1.ytimg.com

It helps you win belly button depth contests.
 
2013-09-05 11:09:10 AM

Sin_City_Superhero: wurdjunky: When my kids get hiccups, I tickle them mercilessly for around 30 seconds

That's only OK if you know the kids, though. Trust me.


if you tickle for long enough they will eventually wet themselves. which is a source of amusement. they'll have stopped hiccuping as well so the little tykes will have nothing to complain about. do it outside though perhaps... or at least in their own bedroom rather than the living room or study or what have you
 
2013-09-05 11:15:17 AM
www.halfmoonbay.co.uk
 
2013-09-05 11:15:37 AM
Inhale as much as you can. Hold if for a couple seconds, then suck in some more. Then another pull in. One more just to prove you can't get any more air there (this is where your friends should take a picture of you, b/c your mouth is making a very strange shape)

Exhale slowly until you can't exhale any more. Hold it for a couple seconds. Then another push out. One more so there's not anything at all in there.

Cured.
 
2013-09-05 11:21:24 AM

Sin_City_Superhero: wurdjunky: When my kids get hiccups, I tickle them mercilessly for around 30 seconds

That's only OK if you know the kids, though. Trust me.


I don't recommend trying it on the wife either. Unless you like it when they get punchy.
 
2013-09-05 11:25:27 AM

waterrockets: Inhale as much as you can. Hold if for a couple seconds, then suck in some more. Then another pull in. One more just to prove you can't get any more air there (this is where your friends should take a picture of you, b/c your mouth is making a very strange shape)

Exhale slowly until you can't exhale any more. Hold it for a couple seconds. Then another push out. One more so there's not anything at all in there.

Cured.


that usually works on me but I have to give it a couple of goes
 
2013-09-05 11:26:49 AM

waterrockets: Inhale as much as you can. Hold if for a couple seconds, then suck in some more. Then another pull in. One more just to prove you can't get any more air there (this is where your friends should take a picture of you, b/c your mouth is making a very strange shape)

Exhale slowly until you can't exhale any more. Hold it for a couple seconds. Then another push out. One more so there's not anything at all in there.

Cured.


The key is pushing the air down really hard against your diaphragm.  Which is what is spazzing (sp?).  Belly breathing ftw.
 
2013-09-05 11:29:59 AM

animal900: abfalter:
When he returned he had a large syringe and told me to drop my drawers.  I got an injection in one butt-cheek and the hiccups stopped within a few minutes.  I asked him what it was and he said it was thorazine.

Thorazine is a severe muscle relaxant.  It is what they use to control raging mental patients to get them to stop moving.

So the doctor injected you with an unknown substance without telling you what the effects would be?  I call BS.


I knew what it was before the injection was made.
 
2013-09-05 11:32:51 AM
Beer makes everyone happy!

img15.imageshack.us

See!
 
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