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(The Detroit_News)   Detroit stops issuing birth and death certificates ... because there is no money to pay for the paper   (detroitnews.com ) divider line
    More: Fail, Detroit, death certificates, bankruptcy, Wayne County, births  
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1454 clicks; posted to Politics » on 03 Sep 2013 at 8:29 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



34 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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Archived thread
 
2013-09-03 05:25:35 AM  
"...problem was short-lived ...."  So, it's 'stopped' for a short while. Was the story too long to take in, subby?
 
2013-09-03 05:34:41 AM  
FTFA:

"In bankrupt and frequently bizarre Detroit, dying is easy."

Unfortunately, a little too true.
 
2013-09-03 08:09:44 AM  

colinspooky: "...problem was short-lived ...."  So, it's 'stopped' for a short while. Was the story too long to take in, subby?


Is this your first day here?
 
2013-09-03 08:18:03 AM  
City couldn't issue death - or birth - certificates because skittish vendor wanted cash to supply paperShoulda gone with these guys:

media.glassdoor.com

Also, basic services like these are what happens when you run out of money.

Good luck with pet projects like banning large sodas when can't even afford paper for birth and death certificates.
 
2013-09-03 08:30:23 AM  

Nabb1: colinspooky: "...problem was short-lived ...."  So, it's 'stopped' for a short while. Was the story too long to take in, subby?

Is this your first day here?


Nope - just don't like seeing 'facts' mashed beyond recognition, unless it's for a joke.........
 
2013-09-03 08:30:49 AM  
Detroit's only saving grace is that it isn't Gary, Indiana.
 
2013-09-03 08:31:12 AM  
So sometime down the road, we'll have this conversation:

"WHAR BIRTH CERTIFICATE WHAR?"
"I was born in Detroit and they weren't issuing them then."
 
2013-09-03 08:33:21 AM  

bluorangefyre: So sometime down the road, we'll have this conversation:

"WHAR BIRTH CERTIFICATE WHAR?"
"I was born in Detroit and they weren't issuing them then."


For purposes of national discourse, everyone in Detroit was born in Kenya.
 
2013-09-03 08:35:14 AM  
Just flee that damn place.
 
2013-09-03 08:44:49 AM  
Am I to assume every subby of a piece with a joke about Detroit, Cleveland, or Chicago lives in a trailer park in Sister Fister, AR, population 75, that is about to finally get running water and a Druther's, not necessarily in that order?
 
2013-09-03 09:09:46 AM  
Follow up story will read paper is bought from a vendor who is the mayor's cousin at 10x the going rate.
 
2013-09-03 09:10:38 AM  

monoski: Follow up story will read paper is bought from a vendor who is the mayor's cousin at 10x the going rate.


Don't they have a dictator, er, Emergency Manager now?
 
2013-09-03 10:25:04 AM  
fbcdn-sphotos-b-a.akamaihd.net
 
2013-09-03 10:25:37 AM  

EyeballKid: Am I to assume every subby of a piece with a joke about Detroit, Cleveland, or Chicago lives in a trailer park in Sister Fister, AR, population 75, that is about to finally get running water and a Druther's, not necessarily in that order?


Wait, what's the angle on Cleveland?

I know Chicago's a favorite target because Obama's from there and their murder rate gives a nice talking point about gun control, and Detroit's a shiathole which recently got a Republican dictatoremergency manager installed to finally ruin the place once and for all and produce some prominent, tangible failures that everyone can blame on liberals, but I must've missed the memo on Cleveland.

/oh, and Chicago's got the most black people of any city besides NYC, and Detroit's got the most black people per capita of any city, but that couldn't possibly have anything to do with it.
 
2013-09-03 10:32:34 AM  

dookdookdook: EyeballKid: Am I to assume every subby of a piece with a joke about Detroit, Cleveland, or Chicago lives in a trailer park in Sister Fister, AR, population 75, that is about to finally get running water and a Druther's, not necessarily in that order?

Wait, what's the angle on Cleveland?

I know Chicago's a favorite target because Obama's from there and their murder rate gives a nice talking point about gun control, and Detroit's a shiathole which recently got a Republican dictatoremergency manager installed to finally ruin the place once and for all and produce some prominent, tangible failures that everyone can blame on liberals, but I must've missed the memo on Cleveland.

/oh, and Chicago's got the most black people of any city besides NYC, and Detroit's got the most black people per capita of any city, but that couldn't possibly have anything to do with it.


Cleveland is a convenient punchline city fallback if Chicago and Detroit were taken. And, according to the 2010 Census, 53.3% of Cleveland's population is black.

But, yes, I assume all the city swipes are often taken by residents of backwater shiatholes that can't convince any company not looking for just-a-hair-above-slave-wage labor to move in.
 
2013-09-03 10:56:28 AM  

EyeballKid: dookdookdook: EyeballKid: [snip]
I know Chicago's a favorite target because Obama's from there and their murder rate gives a nice talking point about gun control, and Detroit's a shiathole which recently got a Republican dictatoremergency manager installed to finally ruin the place once and for all[/But, yes, I assume all the city swipes are often taken by residents of backwater shiatholes that can't convince any company not looking for just-a-hair-above-slave-wage labor to move in.

[/snip]

I hate to break it to you, but like him or not, Kevyn Orr has publicly declared himself a democrat - like live on local TV declared.
 
2013-09-03 10:59:15 AM  

bluorangefyre: So sometime down the road, we'll have this conversation:

"WHAR BIRTH CERTIFICATE WHAR?"
"I was born in Detroit and they weren't issuing them then."


It's all part of Chairman Maobama's evil master plan. He is intentionally destroying the US economy so that cities/states can no longer issue birth certificates. Then, 40 years from now, they sneak another secret socialist Muslim Kenyan into the White House by claiming that he was actually born in the US, but couldn't get a birth certificate. This is just a backup plan, of course, in case his plan to declare himself dictator-for-life somehow doesn't work out. These guys think of everything!
 
2013-09-03 11:02:09 AM  

bluorangefyre: So sometime down the road, we'll have this conversation:

"WHAR BIRTH CERTIFICATE WHAR?"
"I was born in Detroit and they weren't issuing them then."



Somewhere in the world right now, an older orange skinned gentleman with a bad comb over is dancing for joy.
 
2013-09-03 11:19:29 AM  

dookdookdook: I know Chicago's a favorite target because Obama's from there and their murder rate gives a nice talking point about gun control, and Detroit's a shiathole which recently got a Republican dictatoremergency manager installed to finally ruin the place once and for all and produce some prominent, tangible failures that everyone can blame on liberals, but I must've missed the memo on Cleveland.


I live in New Orleans. It is a proud American city known the world over for it's music, food and culture and is trying to rise from the depths of decades of institutionalized crime, political corruption that has infected every facet of the political landscape, abject poverty, one of the worst public education systems in the country, and more recently, the greatest natural disaster* ever to befall an American city. And every man woman and child here is so damned grateful that we are not Detroit.

*Levee failure was a man-made disaster courtesy of the Army Corps of Engineers
 
2013-09-03 11:21:21 AM  

plc5_250: I hate to break it to you, but like him or not, Kevyn Orr has publicly declared himself a democrat - like live on local TV declared.


Alright then, let me rephrase:

Detroit's a shiathole which was recently given a dictatoremergency manager personally chosen by the Republican governor through the authority of a state law which 1) was passed by the Republican state government, 2) was repealed through a ballot initiative in 2012 only after the Republicans on the state election board tried to get the petition quashed because the font size on the forms was too small, 3) was subsequently re-passed by the Republican government a month later with new and improved technicalities making it immune from ballot repeals, and 4) has shown zero ability to actually improve the situation of any of the many other towns whose local democracies it abolished

/tbh, the narrative works even better if the emergency manager is (nominally) a democrat
 
2013-09-03 11:27:47 AM  
So if I murder someone in Detroit they can't prosecute me because there's no paper trail indicating that a death even occurred?

/makes a list
//how the hell do I lure them to Detroit?
 
2013-09-03 12:03:01 PM  
Won't someone think of the voter ID's?
 
2013-09-03 12:33:09 PM  

Nabb1: dookdookdook: I know Chicago's a favorite target because Obama's from there and their murder rate gives a nice talking point about gun control, and Detroit's a shiathole which recently got a Republican dictatoremergency manager installed to finally ruin the place once and for all and produce some prominent, tangible failures that everyone can blame on liberals, but I must've missed the memo on Cleveland.

I live in New Orleans. It is a proud American city known the world over for it's music, food and culture and is trying to rise from the depths of decades of institutionalized crime, political corruption that has infected every facet of the political landscape, abject poverty, one of the worst public education systems in the country, and more recently, the greatest natural disaster* ever to befall an American city. And every man woman and child here is so damned grateful that we are not Detroit.

*Levee failure was a man-made disaster courtesy of the Army Corps of Engineers


It wasn't the Corp of engineers, it was hit people being stupid and living below sea level.
 
2013-09-03 12:43:16 PM  
petcaretips.net

If you were born in Detroit, you were never born.
 
2013-09-03 01:32:18 PM  
How will we know if our presidential candidate in 2048 is Kenyan or not??!!
 
2013-09-03 01:42:45 PM  

dookdookdook: Wait, what's the angle on Cleveland?


It's cursed.
 
2013-09-03 01:44:30 PM  

oryx: [petcaretips.net image 320x240]

If you were born in Detroit, you were never born.


It's not a wonderful life in Detroit, that's for sure.

/love that movie
//watch it every year on Christmas Eve
 
2013-09-03 02:29:28 PM  

dookdookdook: I know Chicago's a favorite target because Obama's from there and their murder rate gives a nice talking point about gun control, and Detroit's a shiathole which recently got a Republican dictatoremergency manager installed to finally ruin the place once and for all and produce some prominent, tangible failures that everyone can blame on liberals


So, like they could totally have made a comeback if it hadn't been for those pesky Republicans? Well, if you'd like to remove the Republican dictator/emergency manager and let Detroit deal with its problems without adult supervision or outside money, I'd be in favor. The only condition I'd make is that the state provide relocation assistance for the fleeing hordes that result. Perhaps when it has devolved into to an uninhabitable wasteland and there's nothing remaining for Republicans to "ruin" you'll be ready to let them try again.
 
2013-09-03 03:15:26 PM  
ain't Freedom great!!!
 
2013-09-03 04:36:27 PM  
Omnicorp declines to get involved: "Eh, there's no money in it".
 
2013-09-03 06:41:36 PM  

Outrageous Muff: Detroit's only saving grace is that it isn't Gary, Indiana.


At least Gary has a functioning city council.  Detroit politicians exist solely to steal from the city.
 
2013-09-03 09:04:15 PM  
Thank god, I thought it was because the zombie apocalypse had actually started.

You know that when it starts, it will totally be in Detroit.
 
2013-09-04 12:43:01 AM  

the_rhino: *Levee failure was a man-made disaster courtesy of the Army Corps of Engineers

It wasn't the Corp of engineers, it was hit people being stupid and living below sea level.


Living below seas level surrounded on 3 sides by the Ocean, a lake and a river/canal.
 
2013-09-04 02:05:45 AM  
Liberal utopia...unions controlling everything. How's that working out for ya, Detroit? Good? I hope good.

Anyway, at least you had a mayor with some street cred, and that's what's important...not this picking up the trash bullshiat.
 
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