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(Gawker)   Labor Day is a scam to keep you poor and miserable forever - so you might as well go ahead and enjoy getting drunk in your yard ... again   (gawker.com) divider line 158
    More: Sad, Labor Day, Del Taco, means of production, May Day, spring festival, communist revolution  
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11605 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Aug 2013 at 6:13 AM (51 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



158 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-08-31 02:12:56 AM
Looks like someone signed is enjoying their Intro to American History class.
 
2013-08-31 02:23:19 AM
You are all slaves, and you enjoy being slaves... or at least aren't irritated enough to do something about it.

/the trick is to keep the collar around your neck from chafing.
 
2013-08-31 02:35:10 AM
I'll be working Labor Day.
 
2013-08-31 03:04:00 AM
Good article.  America is farked.  Put a fork in it.
 
2013-08-31 03:56:32 AM
Give up.  Silliness and hyperbole.  It's going to be alright, and afterwards, we'll all go to the House of Pancakes.
 
2013-08-31 06:17:45 AM

JerkyMeat: Good article.  America is farked.  Put a fork in it.


The teabaggers are dying off rapidly. Things will get better.
 
2013-08-31 06:20:19 AM
STFU and GBTW
 
2013-08-31 06:25:24 AM

MorrisBird: Give up.  Silliness and hyperbole.  It's going to be alright, and afterwards, we'll all go to the House of Pancakes.


...what're you nuts? We had pancakes for breakfast. Gotta go to a place I can get a shot and a beer, steak, maybe, not more farkin' pancakes, c'mon.
 
2013-08-31 06:26:26 AM
Yawn... Every national holiday that rolls around someone has to post an article about the "shocking truth" behind it. Who give a farking shiat!
 
2013-08-31 06:28:11 AM
RTFA, all too true. Oh, all politicians suck & America IS doomed. Thanks for tuning in.
 
2013-08-31 06:28:33 AM
I just got laid off last month and I'm coming up on 4 years sober. I'm totally free on Monday if you guys are doing anything...
 
2013-08-31 06:30:11 AM
They're not going to eliminate all jobs.. they'll come up with new ones, so that people still don't have free time to think about how things are.
 
2013-08-31 06:31:33 AM
I particularly love the part about "May The Fourth Be With You" Day was some sort of conspiracy by Disney to bury a day that "commemorated" the Haymarket Massacre in 1886. Yes, I remember those solemn days growing up when we reflected on that as a nation until the Star Wars geeks kept an annual running joke going for a few years until Disney decided to get in on the action and make some money.

Also, St. Joseph's Day is March 19 and has been for years. I'm assuming the writer doesn't know too many Sicilians and hasn't experienced the joy of a St. Joseph's altar.
 
2013-08-31 06:33:14 AM
...so you might as well go ahead and enjoy getting drunk in your yard ...

Challenge accepted.

ghare: The teabaggers are dying off rapidly. Things will get better.


Funny how they keep getting replaced. You know, about the time teenage liberals grow up, get jobs, and have to actually start paying taxes.
 
2013-08-31 06:33:49 AM
Who cares?  Scam me if you want, as long as I get a day off it's fine with me.
 
2013-08-31 06:34:14 AM
Most Gawker articles aren't that great...but that one was pretty good!
 
2013-08-31 06:35:09 AM
that article could have originated from prison planet.
 
2013-08-31 06:36:12 AM
Where I work  awards were are given out for duration of temporary service. We have "temps" getting awards for over 10 years of service. Sort of an oxymoron.
 
2013-08-31 06:41:30 AM

WhoopAssWayne: .

ghare: The teabaggers are dying off rapidly. Things will get better.

Funny how they keep getting replaced. You know, about the time teenage liberals grow up, get jobs, and have to actually start paying taxes.


Points for cadence but the deduction for truthiness still puts this down at a 2/10
 
2013-08-31 06:45:37 AM
"....that labour spent the first half of the nineteenth century learning the rules of the capitalist game and the second half applying them, then the first half of the twentieth century saw the apparently irresistible triumph of labour, and the second half its eclipse and fall - or almost." ~ Eric Hobsbawm
 
2013-08-31 06:48:08 AM

clovercat: Where I work  awards were are given out for duration of temporary service. We have "temps" getting awards for over 10 years of service. Sort of an oxymoron.


Are there awards given out behind closed doors to the management that managed to screw somebody out of a decade+ of health insurance, paid vacation, retirement assistance and job security?
 
2013-08-31 06:50:09 AM
Sounds like the authors degree in history came in handy for working the labor day sale at old navy.
 
2013-08-31 06:50:52 AM

Arumat: Are there awards given out behind closed doors to the management that managed to screw somebody out of a decade+ of health insurance, paid vacation, retirement assistance and job security?


If only those poor laborers weren't forced at gun point to work there.
 
2013-08-31 06:50:55 AM

Arumat: clovercat: Where I work  awards were are given out for duration of temporary service. We have "temps" getting awards for over 10 years of service. Sort of an oxymoron.

Are there awards given out behind closed doors to the management that managed to screw somebody out of a decade+ of health insurance, paid vacation, retirement assistance and job security?


Nah, they just cackle and light big cigars with burning $100 bills.
 
2013-08-31 06:53:19 AM

Arumat: clovercat: Where I work  awards were are given out for duration of temporary service. We have "temps" getting awards for over 10 years of service. Sort of an oxymoron.

Are there awards given out behind closed doors to the management that managed to screw somebody out of a decade+ of health insurance, paid vacation, retirement assistance and job security?


You must be joking. There's no closed doors. We live in a world where you will regularly hear things like "Labor's at 21%, I gotta send you home" and "Thanks for coming in early yesterday, but I have to send you home after one hour today so you don't get over 32 hours" and "If I let you get overtime, I won't make my bonus this month, so I need you to go on break, sit in the dining room, and wait for an order to clock back in".
 
2013-08-31 06:56:17 AM

WhoopAssWayne: Arumat: Are there awards given out behind closed doors to the management that managed to screw somebody out of a decade+ of health insurance, paid vacation, retirement assistance and job security?

If only those poor laborers weren't forced at gun point to work there.


Go blow a goat, asshole. None of us would be complaining about the hardships of minimum-wage jobs if there were actually any better jobs out there. It's time to demand a living wage and a worker's bill of rights. Hell, I'd take the worker's bill of rights over the minimum wage, to be honest. I don't think you have any f*cking idea the kind of soul-sucking bullsh*t your average wage slave has to put up with.
 
2013-08-31 06:57:17 AM
I want to party with this guy.
 
2013-08-31 07:00:50 AM
Cheers Farkers!!

/happy as fark to have a long weekend

//21 years at current company
 
2013-08-31 07:02:20 AM
 
2013-08-31 07:02:32 AM
http://haymarketbrewing.com/

Hearing the name Haymarket just makes me want beer and their delicious pretzels.


Yes it's named for the massacre/area it's in.
 
2013-08-31 07:05:16 AM

TopoGigo: Go blow a goat, asshole.


LoL! Those rational, well thought out liberals, always winning the argument with logic and reason. And have you ever been around a goat? Disgusting creatures.

TopoGigo: I don't think you have any f*cking idea the kind of soul-sucking bullsh*t your average wage slave has to put up with.


Says the guy who gladly pays the neighborhood kids $1000 a week, with health insurance, bonuses, and 8 weeks paid vacation to mow their yard each week. It's a two-way street when you hire out jobs is it not? It's all about "wage-equality" when it's your money on the line I'm sure.
 
2013-08-31 07:06:26 AM
I'm going to spend Labor Day the way I always do: plotting to blow up the Haymarket Riot Monument.
 
2013-08-31 07:15:34 AM

Mentat: Looks like someone signed is enjoying their Intro to American History class.


Done in one.  

Seriously, I still have "Give Me Liberty Vol. II" on my bookshelf from my Intro to American History (1877-Present) class, and this is the subject of one of the chapters.  I remember feeling really upset when I found out the "truth" but my indignity was overshadowed by my urge to chase tail.  I feel as though this trait is what eventually led me to be such a calm and relaxed person.
 
2013-08-31 07:19:36 AM
I celebrate Labor Day every year the way I always do:

I track down a Pinkertons agent and beat the living shiat out of them.
 
2013-08-31 07:19:49 AM

Nabb1: I particularly love the part about "May The Fourth Be With You" Day was some sort of conspiracy by Disney to bury a day that "commemorated" the Haymarket Massacre in 1886. Yes, I remember those solemn days growing up when we reflected on that as a nation until the Star Wars geeks kept an annual running joke going for a few years until Disney decided to get in on the action and make some money.


Yeah, that's pretty much where I checked out. Trying to frame the whole May the Fourth Be With You thing as some capitalist conspiracy to keep people from celebrating worker's rights just makes the author sound like the hipster at the bar that thinks he's a lot more intelligent and intuitive than he really is. Even Alex Jones thinks this guy is stretching a bit.
 
2013-08-31 07:26:20 AM

Jizz Master Zero: Nabb1: I particularly love the part about "May The Fourth Be With You" Day was some sort of conspiracy by Disney to bury a day that "commemorated" the Haymarket Massacre in 1886. Yes, I remember those solemn days growing up when we reflected on that as a nation until the Star Wars geeks kept an annual running joke going for a few years until Disney decided to get in on the action and make some money.

Yeah, that's pretty much where I checked out. Trying to frame the whole May the Fourth Be With You thing as some capitalist conspiracy to keep people from celebrating worker's rights just makes the author sound like the hipster at the bar that thinks he's a lot more intelligent and intuitive than he really is. Even Alex Jones thinks this guy is stretching a bit.


I was picturing the writer as this at that point:

i2.photobucket.com
 
2013-08-31 07:30:06 AM
Good article.

I'm one of the lucky ones (salaried plus overtime when I can get it) and both of my kids are doing ok. I'll be at this job until I drop dead most likely. Retirement isn't really a realistic option anymore (unless I'm ok with renting a room in a flophouse and eating cat food).

I really hate what this country has become. There was always a gap between the haves and have nots, but in the past just about anyone that put their nose to the grindstone and worked hard could have a reasonably comfortable life. Now it seems like everyone works themselves half to death doing more than one job just to make ends meet, and God help you if you get seriously ill in this country- it will financially ruin your family for eternity. The greed of the upper class is astonishing. Hopefully one day soon it will bite them on the ass. I'm not saying it's time to start torching the mansions, but I definitely think it's time to make sure you have a lot of matches and lighters handy. The rich of this country have completely raped and ruined the common man and it's about time to return the favor.
 
2013-08-31 07:31:19 AM
Any farkers doing anything special on the grill this weekend? I'm thinking about smoking a pork shoulder. Charcoal/hickory, slow smoked at 225F on the weber smokey mountain.
 
2013-08-31 07:35:51 AM
May Day clashed with Memorial Day, so they moved it to September. Problem?
 
2013-08-31 07:38:34 AM
He has it all wrong.  The labor movement is trying to usurp the ancient celebration of Spring for their political purposes.  But go ahead and wallow in self righteousness ignoring the beauty of spring brought to us by the goddess Flora.
 
2013-08-31 07:38:36 AM

Jizz Master Zero: Nabb1: I particularly love the part about "May The Fourth Be With You" Day was some sort of conspiracy by Disney to bury a day that "commemorated" the Haymarket Massacre in 1886. Yes, I remember those solemn days growing up when we reflected on that as a nation until the Star Wars geeks kept an annual running joke going for a few years until Disney decided to get in on the action and make some money.

Yeah, that's pretty much where I checked out. Trying to frame the whole May the Fourth Be With You thing as some capitalist conspiracy to keep people from celebrating worker's rights just makes the author sound like the hipster at the bar that thinks he's a lot more intelligent and intuitive than he really is. Even Alex Jones thinks this guy is stretching a bit.


I stopped reading when he put scare quotes around "grad student," as though that master's, doctorate, or professional degree is somehow not a real thing.
 
2013-08-31 07:43:59 AM
I'm working Monday. Didn't even know it was Labor Day. Don't even know WTF Labor Day is.
 
2013-08-31 07:44:02 AM

jeffowl: The labor movement is trying to usurp the ancient celebration of Spring for their political purposes


In late summer / early fall...

//at least in this hemisphere, you know, the MURICAN hemisphere
 
2013-08-31 07:44:58 AM
Thinking I'll join these guys on Monday.

Industrial Workers of the World

/Yeah, I know, but a pointless gesture is still a gesture.
//Injury to one is an injury to all, yada yada, yada.
///Slashies for the workers!
 
2013-08-31 07:46:44 AM

Mugato: I'm working Monday. Didn't even know it was Labor Day. Don't even know WTF Labor Day is.


It's a holiday where american workers show their gratitude to their employers by giving them 10 hours of free labor and a knee-rattling blowj**.
 
2013-08-31 07:52:49 AM

JerkyMeat: Good article.  America is farked.  Put a fork in it.


MorrisBird: Give up.  Silliness and hyperbole.  It's going to be alright, and afterwards, we'll all go to the House of Pancakes.


I'm thinking that perhaps the truth lies somewhere in between.
 
2013-08-31 07:54:27 AM

jeffowl: He has it all wrong.  The labor movement is trying to usurp the ancient celebration of Spring for their political purposes.  But go ahead and wallow in self righteousness ignoring the beauty of spring brought to us by the goddess Flora.


Bippity boppity boo, motherf**ker.
 
2013-08-31 07:57:16 AM

deaccessioned: Thinking I'll join these guys on Monday.

Industrial Workers of the World

/Yeah, I know, but a pointless gesture is still a gesture.
//Injury to one is an injury to all, yada yada, yada.
///Slashies for the workers!


Good idea.  I've met a fair number of Wobblies and they're always interesting people.
 
2013-08-31 08:15:37 AM

Dwight_Yeast: deaccessioned: Thinking I'll join these guys on Monday.

Industrial Workers of the World

/Yeah, I know, but a pointless gesture is still a gesture.
//Injury to one is an injury to all, yada yada, yada.
///Slashies for the workers!

Good idea.  I've met a fair number of Wobblies and they're always interesting people.


Excellent!!  Be sure to have your credit card ready for your pointless gesture.  And be sure to pony up every month.

ftfws
Select Your Initiation & Dues Rate and Submit Your Payment:
Minimum Initiation ($9) + First Month's Dues ($9) = $18 (US) - if you make less than $2,000.00 (US) per month;
Regular Initiation ($18) + First Month's Dues ($18) = $36 (US) - if you make between $2,000.00-$3,500.00 (US) per month;
Maximum Initiation ($27) + First Month's Dues ($27) = $54 (US) - if you make more than $3,500.00 (US) per month.

Might I suggest a non pointless place to throw your money like your local food bank?
 
2013-08-31 08:15:37 AM

generallyso: [i.imgur.com image 600x1417]
Courtesy of Questionable Content


Webcomics: Turning copy/paste into money
 
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