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(USA Today)   Guy fails in suicide-by-guardrail, so he opts for little-used Plan B involving a power drill. Still alive   (usatoday.com) divider line 56
    More: Fail, Plan B, suicides, Central Indiana  
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5871 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Aug 2013 at 10:00 AM (51 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



56 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-08-29 10:01:50 AM
calitreview.com
 
2013-08-29 10:02:10 AM
Because I'm ALWAYS rollin' with a power-drill in my car!
 
2013-08-29 10:02:40 AM
Assisted suicide needs to be legal in this country. This guy is obviously not interested in living.
 
2013-08-29 10:03:11 AM
Killing yourself is about the easiest thing a human can do.

What a failure... should probably just kill himself...
 
2013-08-29 10:03:48 AM
One and done, easy as pi.
 
2013-08-29 10:07:31 AM
I thought Plan B wasn't so killy after the first few trimesters.
 
2013-08-29 10:07:53 AM
This was a triumph.
 
2013-08-29 10:10:45 AM

Slackfumasta: Assisted suicide needs to be legal in this country. This guy is obviously not interested in living.


Head down to the gangy part of town. Park near a group of scary-looking dudes. Start screaming racial and manhood-related insults.

Or point a toy gun at a cop.

(suicide note in your shoe in both cases)
 
2013-08-29 10:11:01 AM
Killing yourself with a drill? How boring.
 
2013-08-29 10:11:36 AM

Slackfumasta: Assisted suicide needs to be legal in this country. This guy is obviously not interested in living.


Actual Assisted suicide should be reserved for those with terminal conditions such as paralysis, late stage cancer, etc.
  There isn't a lot of evidence in the article to work with, but this guy appears to be severely mentally ill, possibly schizophrenic.
 
2013-08-29 10:16:13 AM

NutWrench: Killing yourself with a drill? How boring.


If he'd succeeded he'd have bit the dust, but he wasn't quite able to pull the hole thing off.
 
2013-08-29 10:19:00 AM
don't kill yourself

/we'll do it for you
//let's find a rock
 
2013-08-29 10:19:04 AM
Clearly one of those gun control nuts.
 
2013-08-29 10:20:53 AM
2.bp.blogspot.com

/Probably obscure.
 
2013-08-29 10:24:41 AM
He really just wanted to hang out with George at the Waffle Hut.
 
2013-08-29 10:24:50 AM

skozlaw: NutWrench: Killing yourself with a drill? How boring.

If he'd succeeded he'd have bit the dust, but he wasn't quite able to pull the hole thing off.


Silly ass, just trying to chuck his live away like that.
 
2013-08-29 10:25:11 AM
Tuesday's crash snarled traffic along I-69 for hours.

Nevermind failing to kill yourself - it must really suck when your failed suicide attempt is reduced to causing an inconvenience for drivers.
 
2013-08-29 10:25:30 AM
*life
 
2013-08-29 10:27:07 AM
cdn0.akamai.coub.com

/Fark's taste in movies automatically makes this one obscure
 
2013-08-29 10:27:36 AM
Right-handed people problems
 
2013-08-29 10:36:34 AM
This is why I'm so pro-suicide rights. This guy really, really, really wants to die. Strap him up with an IV, let him press the button.
 
2013-08-29 10:38:05 AM

MVEAlpha: This was a triumph.


I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS.
 
2013-08-29 10:38:33 AM
I too want to bore the image of Miley Cyrus' tongue out of my mind.
 
2013-08-29 10:39:17 AM

JustHereForThePics: He really just wanted to hang out with George at the Waffle Hut.


Der Waffle Haus
 
2013-08-29 10:46:51 AM
i.imgur.com

Would have done it for him.

/Obscure?
 
2013-08-29 10:47:12 AM

Rabid Badger Beaver Weasel: MVEAlpha: This was a triumph.

I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS.


It's hard to overstate my satisfaction.
 
2013-08-29 10:47:42 AM
It would have worked.
filmdope.com
 
2013-08-29 10:49:12 AM

Mad_Radhu: JustHereForThePics: He really just wanted to hang out with George at the Waffle Hut.

Der Waffle Haus


Damnit!
 
2013-08-29 10:50:24 AM
3.bp.blogspot.com
Gee, I don't know. Buy a bullet, and rent a gun?!
 
2013-08-29 10:51:29 AM
i58.photobucket.com
 
2013-08-29 10:51:35 AM
It's really not hard to do it correctly if you're serious about it.  Anyone who survives suicide didn't really want to succeed.
 
2013-08-29 10:56:10 AM

Rising_Zan_Samurai_Gunman: severely mentally ill, possibly schizophrenic.


You ever had a relative like that? I've had a few, and they don't only ruin their lives they take everyone around them down with them. Especially their children. There are two in particular that everyone in my extended family would not shed a tear about if they managed to shuffle off the mortal coil. These are also the types of people that spray bullets around in malls,schools,work places etc. Society would not lose out on this deal.
 
2013-08-29 10:58:40 AM
CSB time:

I happened upon a car crash once that turned out to be a suicide attempt. I was driving in Vermont on 91 right near White River Junction when traffic almost completely stopped at the crest of a hill. We crawled along for about 1000 feet until I got to what caused the sudden traffic: a truck crashed perpendicular into the outer guardrail. I was a EMT at the time, so I pulled over and jumped out with my kit. The truck was stalled and the driver was completely out, slumped over on the bench seat of the truck. No seat belt. Both doors were locked. I pried open the back vent window and reached in to get the door lock. Once I got the door open I could get to the guy. He was in bad shape... head injury, flail chest from the steering wheel, obvious rales, possible long bone fractures. A statey showed up right around then and called rescue. Right as I was talking to the cop, the guy briefly came too and mumbled something about his hat. I looked inside his hat and found a note tucked into the headband. I handed it to the cop... wish I had time to read it but I had a patient.

I got the guy as stabilized as I could on the bench seat and helped load him once the rescue rig got there. I checked with the cop if he needed me for anything, cleaned up and walked back to the car. Now that I had time, I could make out that the guy had swerved all the way from the other side, across the median strip, and into the guardrail on our side. What a way to try to off yourself.

I never knew what happened to him - I'm assuming they brought him to Dartmouth 15 minutes away and he made it.
 
2013-08-29 11:10:01 AM
Wil E. Coyote reenactors are amongst the bravest of us.

Three huzzahs!
 
2013-08-29 11:15:23 AM

The_Eliminator: CSB time:

I happened upon a car crash once that turned out to be a suicide attempt. I was driving in Vermont on 91 right near White River Junction when traffic almost completely stopped at the crest of a hill. We crawled along for about 1000 feet until I got to what caused the sudden traffic: a truck crashed perpendicular into the outer guardrail. I was a EMT at the time, so I pulled over and jumped out with my kit. The truck was stalled and the driver was completely out, slumped over on the bench seat of the truck. No seat belt. Both doors were locked. I pried open the back vent window and reached in to get the door lock. Once I got the door open I could get to the guy. He was in bad shape... head injury, flail chest from the steering wheel, obvious rales, possible long bone fractures. A statey showed up right around then and called rescue. Right as I was talking to the cop, the guy briefly came too and mumbled something about his hat. I looked inside his hat and found a note tucked into the headband. I handed it to the cop... wish I had time to read it but I had a patient.

I got the guy as stabilized as I could on the bench seat and helped load him once the rescue rig got there. I checked with the cop if he needed me for anything, cleaned up and walked back to the car. Now that I had time, I could make out that the guy had swerved all the way from the other side, across the median strip, and into the guardrail on our side. What a way to try to off yourself.

I never knew what happened to him - I'm assuming they brought him to Dartmouth 15 minutes away and he made it.



That is, though, a cool story.  Bro.
 
2013-08-29 11:22:51 AM
 
2013-08-29 11:24:16 AM
I went to middle school with this guy. Don't remember a thing about him.

/CSB
 
2013-08-29 11:26:19 AM
dyingscene.com
 
2013-08-29 11:44:53 AM
Yeah about that.  It's bad when everything goes according to plan.
It's worse when it doesn't.

Have seen the effects, makes you want to volunteer at the local support hotline.
 
2013-08-29 11:47:47 AM

asleep71: [25.media.tumblr.com image 850x477]
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drive_(The_X-Files)


I'll be damned, I remember that episode, didn't remember it was Cranston.
 
2013-08-29 11:55:04 AM
Well, the good news is that it was easy for neurosurgery to put the bolt in.
 
2013-08-29 12:24:10 PM
Poor guy.  Helium hoods are the way to go.
 
2013-08-29 12:39:32 PM
Time to make the doughnuts ...

4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-08-29 12:43:34 PM
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-08-29 01:13:21 PM
You've had a bad day
I'm making a note here: epic fail
It's hard to overstate your lack of sense, now
What were you thinking?
You drilled in your head because you could?
For the love of all is good, you should have called me instead

But I see you vying to correct your "mistake"
And you'll keep on trying 'til you meet your end fate
And your life will be done, but the world will go on, for the people who are still alive

Why are you angry?
Why are you so determined now?
Did you think the world owed you a favor?
Listen to me, now
The world doesn't care, uh-uh, no way
You might think they'll know your name, but they'll just move right along

There'd be no sense crying over your little state
Because no one bothers when you want them to hate
So go on, get a gun, make it quick and get it done, but remember we'll be still alive

If you could realize
Someone might care, even for you
Maybe you would see the love around you
Drillbits and guardrails
They only leave you with headaches
Believe me, you're worth so much more

Look at you still seething when there's living to do
When you look at me, do you not see it's true?
You've a place to fulfill, and friends who want you still, so come on and join those still alive

Yes, you're breathing and you're still alive
Another day and you are still alive
Death must wait because you're still alive
 We're so happy you are still alive
Stay with me and remain still alive
 
2013-08-29 01:38:29 PM

skozlaw: One and done, easy as pi.


Yup.

1:38 PM, press enter.
 
2013-08-29 02:05:42 PM

cefm: It's really not hard to do it correctly if you're serious about it.  Anyone who survives suicide didn't really want to succeed.


This.

Suicide "attempt" is just a call for help.
 
yms
2013-08-29 03:41:21 PM
www.videotapeswapshop.co.uk
 
2013-08-29 04:39:11 PM
guardrails are designed to not kill you when you hit them.
 
2013-08-29 05:16:41 PM
Maybe the guardrail collision really was an accident, and he thought it was caused by poor blood flow to the brain, which he attempted to treat via self-trepanation.

Or maybe not.
 
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