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(Deadspin)   Will drinking 28 non-alcoholic beers in an hour get me drunk? Well let's find out, one, twoooo   (deadspin.com) divider line 72
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5821 clicks; posted to Geek » on 29 Aug 2013 at 7:45 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-08-29 07:51:13 AM
Some questions are just fine being left unanswered.
 
2013-08-29 07:59:00 AM
Wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world?
 
2013-08-29 08:08:53 AM
Wow, that sounds absolutely miserable...
 
2013-08-29 08:15:05 AM
It could kill you.
 
2013-08-29 08:15:10 AM
Stories from the Gulf.
 
2013-08-29 08:19:25 AM
Ok, each O'Douls = ~0.5% ABV, so 30 in an hour, disregarding liver metabolism of alcohol during the hour spent drinking, equals one drink of 15% ABV or 3 beers ~5% ABV. What would be the expected BAC after 1.5 hours?
 
2013-08-29 08:21:19 AM
That's about 2.6 gallons of water, enough to kill a person through water toxicity. Hope he chased it with a Brawndo.
 
2013-08-29 08:22:51 AM
that hurts to watch...
 
2013-08-29 08:26:10 AM

Nabb1: It could kill you.


Only from overhydration, which I think requires > 1.5 gallons in an hour. 12oz*30=360oz/128oz=2.8 gallons, so maybe.
 
2013-08-29 08:30:18 AM
Nice "O" (douls) face.
 
2013-08-29 08:30:51 AM

Galius_Persnickety: That's about 2.6 gallons of water, enough to kill a person through water toxicity. Hope he chased it with a Brawndo.


Even subtracting for carbonation, yeah that should be toxic for the average person.
 
2013-08-29 08:44:09 AM
Overhydration. Watched a cute girl (with F**k me pumps on & a mini) fall to that. Took her off on a stretcher. She recovered.

/no, I didn't get the obligatory BJ.
 
2013-08-29 08:48:39 AM
No, but it will make you look stupid, or you are stupid, you're stupid.
 
2013-08-29 08:53:11 AM

DrSansabeltNoShiatSlacks: Overhydration. Watched a cute girl (with F**k me pumps on & a mini) fall to that. Took her off on a stretcher. She recovered.

/no, I didn't get the obligatory BJ.


Wait, she was getting loaded up.. on water?
 
2013-08-29 08:56:44 AM

BBtB: DrSansabeltNoShiatSlacks: Overhydration. Watched a cute girl (with F**k me pumps on & a mini) fall to that. Took her off on a stretcher. She recovered.

/no, I didn't get the obligatory BJ.

Wait, she was getting loaded up.. on water?


I've heard moron stoners say that there is a 'high' associated with over-hydration.  I've even met one who claims to have done it and that he was very 'farked up'.  He added as an afterthought, 'oh yeah it's pretty dangerous though so you need to be careful.'  As if I would actually try it.  So that might explain why people would actually do this.
 
2013-08-29 09:00:29 AM

simplicimus: Ok, each O'Douls = ~0.5% ABV, so 30 in an hour, disregarding liver metabolism of alcohol during the hour spent drinking, equals one drink of 15% ABV or 3 beers ~5% ABV. What would be the expected BAC after 1.5 hours?


No.

5 million O'douls, or just one teaspoon, still equals .5% abv.

Alcohol BY VOLUME.
 
2013-08-29 09:03:08 AM
non-alcoholic beers

What part of that does he not understand?
 
2013-08-29 09:03:58 AM

Egoy3k: BBtB: DrSansabeltNoShiatSlacks: Overhydration. Watched a cute girl (with F**k me pumps on & a mini) fall to that. Took her off on a stretcher. She recovered.

/no, I didn't get the obligatory BJ.

Wait, she was getting loaded up.. on water?

I've heard moron stoners say that there is a 'high' associated with over-hydration.  I've even met one who claims to have done it and that he was very 'farked up'.  He added as an afterthought, 'oh yeah it's pretty dangerous though so you need to be careful.'  As if I would actually try it.  So that might explain why people would actually do this.


"Overhydration occurs when the body takes in more water than it excretes and its normal sodium level is diluted. This can result in digestive problems, behavioral changes, brain damage, seizures, or coma. An adult whose heart, kidneys, and pituitary gland are functioning properly would have to drink more than two gallons of water a day to develop water intoxication "
http://www.healthline.com/galecontent/overhydration

Who could resist that high?
 
2013-08-29 09:05:51 AM

abhorrent1: non-alcoholic beers

What part of that does he not understand?


Water intoxication. How it works, same as you.
 
2013-08-29 09:07:20 AM

omeganuepsilon: simplicimus: Ok, each O'Douls = ~0.5% ABV, so 30 in an hour, disregarding liver metabolism of alcohol during the hour spent drinking, equals one drink of 15% ABV or 3 beers ~5% ABV. What would be the expected BAC after 1.5 hours?

No.

5 million O'douls, or just one teaspoon, still equals .5% abv.

Alcohol BY VOLUME.


Not questioning the definition of abv, just net alcohol intake.
 
2013-08-29 09:10:33 AM
Would beer have enough carb/sodium and what not to combat the over hydration issue?  Or should you case it with salt?
 
2013-08-29 10:08:14 AM

abhorrent1: non-alcoholic beers

What part of that does he not understand?


but there IS alcohol in nonalcoholic beers. just a very small amount.
 
2013-08-29 10:08:50 AM

wingnut396: Would beer have enough carb/sodium and what not to combat the over hydration issue?  Or should you case it with salt?


O'douls has 0 mg of salt in it. The carbs don't really matter in this case. About your salt chaser question I checked my runner's guide:

The sodium concentration in extra-cellular fluid is the ratio of weight of sodium ions to weight of water. So, if I have too much water, I can just add more sodium, right? Well, it depends on where you are with respect to normal sodium content in the body. If you have too little sodium, then adding more will help you return to normal. An example many runners have experienced would be low sodium with adequate water, leading to puffiness in the hands and wrists. Taking in more sodium will correct the situation and the puffiness will go down.

But if you have the right amount of sodium, adding a lot more is not good. Excess sodium can increase thirst and prompt more drinking, which is bad if you already have too much water on board ( excess weight ).


So my best answer to you is, if you already had adequate sodium levels in your body when you started consuming the liquids, it may not help depending on how fast you consume the liquids. If you drink slowly then adding sodium as a chaser would be ok. But chugging 28 beers inside of an hour will just cause a huge spike that your body can't really throw salt at fast enough, and since you already had adequate levels to begin with you'll go over in sodium as well.
 
2013-08-29 10:15:49 AM

Egoy3k: BBtB: DrSansabeltNoShiatSlacks: Overhydration. Watched a cute girl (with F**k me pumps on & a mini) fall to that. Took her off on a stretcher. She recovered.

/no, I didn't get the obligatory BJ.

Wait, she was getting loaded up.. on water?

I've heard moron stoners say that there is a 'high' associated with over-hydration.  I've even met one who claims to have done it and that he was very 'farked up'.  He added as an afterthought, 'oh yeah it's pretty dangerous though so you need to be careful.'  As if I would actually try it.  So that might explain why people would actually do this.


You've heard moron stoners say over hydration gets you high? Sounds legit.
 
2013-08-29 10:37:06 AM

simplicimus: Galius_Persnickety: That's about 2.6 gallons of water, enough to kill a person through water toxicity. Hope he chased it with a Brawndo.

Even subtracting for carbonation, yeah that should be toxic for the average person.


As the article states: (Note: It's pretty dangerous to drink this much of anything. Tim is a trained professional. You're not.)

Because a professional can somehow magically process 2.6 gallons of liquid whereas it would kill us noobs.
 
2013-08-29 10:38:17 AM

omeganuepsilon: simplicimus: Ok, each O'Douls = ~0.5% ABV, so 30 in an hour, disregarding liver metabolism of alcohol during the hour spent drinking, equals one drink of 15% ABV or 3 beers ~5% ABV. What would be the expected BAC after 1.5 hours?

No.

5 million O'douls, or just one teaspoon, still equals .5% abv.

Alcohol BY VOLUME.


30 @ .5% ABV = 1 @ 15% ABV

What's so hard about that?
 
2013-08-29 10:45:48 AM
Buddy that spent time in Afghanistan said they tried this a few times.  Not much of a buzz, and you wind up feeling like shiat.
 
2013-08-29 10:50:30 AM
andyofne: Because a professional can somehow magically process 2.6 gallons of liquid whereas it would kill us noobs.

Actually, yes. In the same way that a professional weightlifter can lift that barbell but it would crush my chest.

Though throwing up 80 percent of it afterward probably helped.
 
2013-08-29 10:52:39 AM
O'Douls isn't distilled water, it's probably got some electrolytes in it.
 
2013-08-29 11:30:14 AM
Isn't the 0.5% ABV on non-alcoholic beer some kind of maximum, CYA level they have to put on the bottles? So even if they have a technique to remove all the alcohol, they still have to put 0.5% on it, right?
 
2013-08-29 11:41:03 AM

cannibalparrot: omeganuepsilon: simplicimus: Ok, each O'Douls = ~0.5% ABV, so 30 in an hour, disregarding liver metabolism of alcohol during the hour spent drinking, equals one drink of 15% ABV or 3 beers ~5% ABV. What would be the expected BAC after 1.5 hours?

No.

5 million O'douls, or just one teaspoon, still equals .5% abv.

Alcohol BY VOLUME.

30 @ .5% ABV = 1 @ 15% ABV

What's so hard about that?


The fact that it's wrong.  You've consumed the same amount of ALCOHOL, you're right about that, but you're forgetting that the alcohol is diluted by all the non-alcohol components you've consumed.  It's closer to drinking 1 beer at 15% as well as 29 pints of water.
 
2013-08-29 11:46:12 AM

zipdog: Isn't the 0.5% ABV on non-alcoholic beer some kind of maximum, CYA level they have to put on the bottles? So even if they have a technique to remove all the alcohol, they still have to put 0.5% on it, right?


its a matter of very carefully managed fermentation. that 0.5% is the max allowed by law for it still be called N/A.
but the alcohol is part of the flavor profile, hell, most soda's have a wee bit of alcohol as part of the flavor profile

the stuff is brewed to strength
 
2013-08-29 11:53:56 AM

Yotto: Actually, yes. In the same way that a professional weightlifter can lift that barbell but it would crush my chest.


So you're of the opinion that one can train themselves to make their kidneys remove water from the bloodstream faster than the rest of us?  That our kidneys are weak and small, but this guy must have worked them out and now they're the size of grapefruit and processes 5x the blood?

I'd stay and laugh, but have to be at the urologists in 26 minutes.
 
2013-08-29 11:58:09 AM

Last Man on Earth: cannibalparrot: omeganuepsilon: simplicimus: Ok, each O'Douls = ~0.5% ABV, so 30 in an hour, disregarding liver metabolism of alcohol during the hour spent drinking, equals one drink of 15% ABV or 3 beers ~5% ABV. What would be the expected BAC after 1.5 hours?

No.

5 million O'douls, or just one teaspoon, still equals .5% abv.

Alcohol BY VOLUME.

30 @ .5% ABV = 1 @ 15% ABV

What's so hard about that?

The fact that it's wrong.  You've consumed the same amount of ALCOHOL, you're right about that, but you're forgetting that the alcohol is diluted by all the non-alcohol components you've consumed.  It's closer to drinking 1 beer at 15% as well as 29 pints of water.


Do you guys not read the posts you criticize? He was clearly adding up the total alcohol consumed to see how many normal drinks it'd be equal to.
 
2013-08-29 12:06:09 PM

picturescrazy: Last Man on Earth: cannibalparrot: omeganuepsilon: simplicimus: Ok, each O'Douls = ~0.5% ABV, so 30 in an hour, disregarding liver metabolism of alcohol during the hour spent drinking, equals one drink of 15% ABV or 3 beers ~5% ABV. What would be the expected BAC after 1.5 hours?

No.

5 million O'douls, or just one teaspoon, still equals .5% abv.

Alcohol BY VOLUME.

30 @ .5% ABV = 1 @ 15% ABV

What's so hard about that?

The fact that it's wrong.  You've consumed the same amount of ALCOHOL, you're right about that, but you're forgetting that the alcohol is diluted by all the non-alcohol components you've consumed.  It's closer to drinking 1 beer at 15% as well as 29 pints of water.

Do you guys not read the posts you criticize? He was clearly adding up the total alcohol consumed to see how many normal drinks it'd be equal to.


When you're judging what someone's BAC would be, though, it's not accurate to just measure amount of pure alcohol consumed.  The dilution matters, because it will affect the rate at which the alcohol is metabolized.  That's why one beer at 15% can kick your ass, but three beers at 5% won't hit you as hard.  The fundamental premise is flawed.
 
2013-08-29 12:11:10 PM

js34603: Egoy3k: BBtB: DrSansabeltNoShiatSlacks: Overhydration. Watched a cute girl (with F**k me pumps on & a mini) fall to that. Took her off on a stretcher. She recovered.

/no, I didn't get the obligatory BJ.

Wait, she was getting loaded up.. on water?

I've heard moron stoners say that there is a 'high' associated with over-hydration.  I've even met one who claims to have done it and that he was very 'farked up'.  He added as an afterthought, 'oh yeah it's pretty dangerous though so you need to be careful.'  As if I would actually try it.  So that might explain why people would actually do this.

You've heard moron stoners say over hydration gets you high? Sounds legit.


I never said I believed him.  The thing is not everybody who hears this sort of story is going to dismiss it like we would.  People do dumb things.
 
2013-08-29 12:38:11 PM

Last Man on Earth: picturescrazy: Last Man on Earth: cannibalparrot: omeganuepsilon: simplicimus: Ok, each O'Douls = ~0.5% ABV, so 30 in an hour, disregarding liver metabolism of alcohol during the hour spent drinking, equals one drink of 15% ABV or 3 beers ~5% ABV. What would be the expected BAC after 1.5 hours?

No.

5 million O'douls, or just one teaspoon, still equals .5% abv.

Alcohol BY VOLUME.

30 @ .5% ABV = 1 @ 15% ABV

What's so hard about that?

The fact that it's wrong.  You've consumed the same amount of ALCOHOL, you're right about that, but you're forgetting that the alcohol is diluted by all the non-alcohol components you've consumed.  It's closer to drinking 1 beer at 15% as well as 29 pints of water.

Do you guys not read the posts you criticize? He was clearly adding up the total alcohol consumed to see how many normal drinks it'd be equal to.

When you're judging what someone's BAC would be, though, it's not accurate to just measure amount of pure alcohol consumed.  The dilution matters, because it will affect the rate at which the alcohol is metabolized.  That's why one beer at 15% can kick your ass, but three beers at 5% won't hit you as hard.  The fundamental premise is flawed.


Close. The rate of metabolism won't change, the rate of digestion and absorption will.

The rate limiting factor of metabolism is the CYP2E1 enzyme, not the volume of liquid.
 
2013-08-29 12:42:51 PM

mgshamster: Last Man on Earth: picturescrazy: Last Man on Earth: cannibalparrot: omeganuepsilon: simplicimus: Ok, each O'Douls = ~0.5% ABV, so 30 in an hour, disregarding liver metabolism of alcohol during the hour spent drinking, equals one drink of 15% ABV or 3 beers ~5% ABV. What would be the expected BAC after 1.5 hours?

No.

5 million O'douls, or just one teaspoon, still equals .5% abv.

Alcohol BY VOLUME.

30 @ .5% ABV = 1 @ 15% ABV

What's so hard about that?

The fact that it's wrong.  You've consumed the same amount of ALCOHOL, you're right about that, but you're forgetting that the alcohol is diluted by all the non-alcohol components you've consumed.  It's closer to drinking 1 beer at 15% as well as 29 pints of water.

Do you guys not read the posts you criticize? He was clearly adding up the total alcohol consumed to see how many normal drinks it'd be equal to.

When you're judging what someone's BAC would be, though, it's not accurate to just measure amount of pure alcohol consumed.  The dilution matters, because it will affect the rate at which the alcohol is metabolized.  That's why one beer at 15% can kick your ass, but three beers at 5% won't hit you as hard.  The fundamental premise is flawed.

Close. The rate of metabolism won't change, the rate of digestion and absorption will.

The rate limiting factor of metabolism is the CYP2E1 enzyme, not the volume of liquid.


Ah, thanks for clarifying.  Totally not a biologist or chemist here, so I wasn't sure what process would apply.
 
2013-08-29 12:44:17 PM
Run those 28 O'Douls through a still twice and get back to me.
 
2013-08-29 01:00:47 PM
If Will drinks them, then no, you won't get drunk.
 
2013-08-29 01:04:55 PM

Last Man on Earth: Ah, thanks for clarifying.  Totally not a biologist or chemist here, so I wasn't sure what process would apply.


It was close enough for government work.  Metabolism has varied meanings in casual conversation.  You had the general concept right.

picturescrazy: Last Man on Earth: cannibalparrot: omeganuepsilon: simplicimus: Ok, each O'Douls = ~0.5% ABV, so 30 in an hour, disregarding liver metabolism of alcohol during the hour spent drinking, equals one drink of 15% ABV or 3 beers ~5% ABV. What would be the expected BAC after 1.5 hours?

No.

5 million O'douls, or just one teaspoon, still equals .5% abv.

Alcohol BY VOLUME.

30 @ .5% ABV = 1 @ 15% ABV

What's so hard about that?

The fact that it's wrong.  You've consumed the same amount of ALCOHOL, you're right about that, but you're forgetting that the alcohol is diluted by all the non-alcohol components you've consumed.  It's closer to drinking 1 beer at 15% as well as 29 pints of water.

Do you guys not read the posts you criticize? He was clearly adding up the total alcohol consumed to see how many normal drinks it'd be equal to.


Yes, and the way he phrased and used a makeshift equation was wrong.

If he'd have said 3.5 ounces of alcohol total(or whatever the number would be), he'd be right, but the measurement, ABV, wouldn't change.  He specifically said it would, and there is the error.

As was mentioned, alcohol level alone doesn't matter, but it's concentration within the total liquid delivered.  At .05%, that's 1,999 to 1.  As others have mentioned, you'll likely get sick from the sheer volume of the other liquids before you get any appreciable alcohol intoxication, not to mention water intoxication.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Water_intoxication

Asking if you'd get drunk or not is a pointless question.  You can get drunk by alcohol IV, or enema, but the inherent dangers in these make it much less enjoyable for most people, if not completely fatal.
 
2013-08-29 01:17:00 PM

Last Man on Earth: mgshamster: Last Man on Earth: picturescrazy: Last Man on Earth: cannibalparrot: omeganuepsilon: simplicimus: Ok, each O'Douls = ~0.5% ABV, so 30 in an hour, disregarding liver metabolism of alcohol during the hour spent drinking, equals one drink of 15% ABV or 3 beers ~5% ABV. What would be the expected BAC after 1.5 hours?

No.

5 million O'douls, or just one teaspoon, still equals .5% abv.

Alcohol BY VOLUME.

30 @ .5% ABV = 1 @ 15% ABV

What's so hard about that?

The fact that it's wrong.  You've consumed the same amount of ALCOHOL, you're right about that, but you're forgetting that the alcohol is diluted by all the non-alcohol components you've consumed.  It's closer to drinking 1 beer at 15% as well as 29 pints of water.

Do you guys not read the posts you criticize? He was clearly adding up the total alcohol consumed to see how many normal drinks it'd be equal to.

When you're judging what someone's BAC would be, though, it's not accurate to just measure amount of pure alcohol consumed.  The dilution matters, because it will affect the rate at which the alcohol is metabolized.  That's why one beer at 15% can kick your ass, but three beers at 5% won't hit you as hard.  The fundamental premise is flawed.

Close. The rate of metabolism won't change, the rate of digestion and absorption will.

The rate limiting factor of metabolism is the CYP2E1 enzyme, not the volume of liquid.

Ah, thanks for clarifying.  Totally not a biologist or chemist here, so I wasn't sure what process would apply.


Oops, sorry.  I'm brain dead this morning.  CYP2E1 is only a minor enzyme in alcohol metabolism.  The major enzyme is ADH I (alcohol dehydrogenase), along with ADH II (aldehyde dehydrogenase).

/Just tried to schedule a meeting with someone, and I picked the one day they specifically said they weren't available.
//Feel like a moron
///No sleep; newborn is 2 weeks old
 
2013-08-29 01:19:46 PM
One of my profs is Iranian. He said it was common over there to buy non-alcoholic beer, add a bit of yeast and sugar, and recap. People have bottle cappers just for that purpose.

He also has a story about the time he added too much yeast, and the caps were popping off on his stash on his patio. All his neighbors were upset because his fark up might alert the authorities to everyone's stash of beer.
 
2013-08-29 01:22:51 PM

omeganuepsilon: Last Man on Earth: Ah, thanks for clarifying. Totally not a biologist or chemist here, so I wasn't sure what process would apply.

It was close enough for government work. Metabolism has varied meanings in casual conversation. You had the general concept right.


Pretty much this. I was just being pedantic.
 
2013-08-29 01:25:47 PM
1. I always wondered this and don't mind having the answer.

2. I'm glad the Last Man on Earth will leave a solid mathematical legacy to represent us all (not snark).
 
2013-08-29 01:42:53 PM

Yotto: andyofne: Because a professional can somehow magically process 2.6 gallons of liquid whereas it would kill us noobs.

Actually, yes. In the same way that a professional weightlifter can lift that barbell but it would crush my chest.

Though throwing up 80 percent of it afterward probably helped.


Well, yeah, that only leaves 20% of the barbell left to lift, which should be easy as pie. And gross.
 
2013-08-29 01:43:49 PM

Last Man on Earth: cannibalparrot: omeganuepsilon: simplicimus: Ok, each O'Douls = ~0.5% ABV, so 30 in an hour, disregarding liver metabolism of alcohol during the hour spent drinking, equals one drink of 15% ABV or 3 beers ~5% ABV. What would be the expected BAC after 1.5 hours?

No.

5 million O'douls, or just one teaspoon, still equals .5% abv.

Alcohol BY VOLUME.

30 @ .5% ABV = 1 @ 15% ABV

What's so hard about that?

The fact that it's wrong.  You've consumed the same amount of ALCOHOL, you're right about that, but you're forgetting that the alcohol is diluted by all the non-alcohol components you've consumed.  It's closer to drinking 1 beer at 15% as well as 29 pints of water.


He explicitly states drinking 30 O'Doul's (that have .5 ABV) is equal to drinking one of something else entirely (that has 15% ABV).
 
2013-08-29 01:50:15 PM

simplicimus: Ok, each O'Douls = ~0.5% ABV, so 30 in an hour, disregarding liver metabolism of alcohol during the hour spent drinking, equals one drink of 15% ABV or 3 beers ~5% ABV. What would be the expected BAC after 1.5 hours?


Discounting the volume (which could change the rate of absorption), and assuming a male (females have a different cofactor) of about 180 pound, the BAC would be around 0.04-0.05.  Still below the legal limit.  A person of lighter weight, a female, or a person who has more ADH I and less ADH II (some Asians are genetically predisposed to this) may make the BAC a little higher.
 
2013-08-29 02:06:27 PM
I should try that same experiment this weekend except with a good 5 or 6% alcohol beer.
 
2013-08-29 02:06:58 PM

stewbert: One of my profs is Iranian. He said it was common over there to buy non-alcoholic beer, add a bit of yeast and sugar, and recap. People have bottle cappers just for that purpose.

He also has a story about the time he added too much yeast, and the caps were popping off on his stash on his patio. All his neighbors were upset because his fark up might alert the authorities to everyone's stash of beer.


Ah yes, the old bottle bomb. He's lucky they just popped the caps off and didn't do this:
customerconnect4u.com
 
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