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(WSPD Toledo)   Camper wakes up to wolf eating his head. Worst alarm clock ever   (wspd.com) divider line 67
    More: Scary, wolf attacks  
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7894 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Aug 2013 at 12:09 PM (47 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



67 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-08-28 11:52:30 AM
Woke him up, didn't it?
 
2013-08-28 12:04:47 PM
*sees man drooling Koolaid down front of bibbed overalls*

Dear god, were you raised by wolves?

Yeth in fact I wasssth.

*sees Derpie's head has a sizable bitten chunk taken out of it*

Oh my. I beg your pardon.
 
2013-08-28 12:06:06 PM
Kid's a werewolf now,
 
2013-08-28 12:10:47 PM
Five more minutes!
 
2013-08-28 12:11:29 PM
Seems like the best alarm clock ever.  I'll be he didn't even  think about hitting the snooze button.
 
2013-08-28 12:12:47 PM
sure those kinds of alarm clocks will work for your basic light sleepers... but what about really deep sleepers like me?
 
2013-08-28 12:13:15 PM

jtown: Seems like the best alarm clock ever.  I'll be he didn't even  think about hitting the snooze button.


I think I'd just start punching everything until the pain stopped.
 
2013-08-28 12:14:26 PM
images1.wikia.nocookie.net

Was it a Why-Wolf? Because they'll explain why they're eating you.
Just would like a reason why they decide to violate the Circle of Life Directive. Elton didn't write that song just so some wolf could jump a few spots on the circle. "Whatcha doin' up here, wolfie? Should you be knoshing on a bunny?"
 
2013-08-28 12:14:41 PM
www.robsingleton.com
 
2013-08-28 12:15:12 PM
Always check for widowmakers.
 
2013-08-28 12:15:30 PM
i26.photobucket.com


/wolves breath smells like bunnies
 
2013-08-28 12:18:49 PM
I'd rather wake up to a real wolf chewing my head than listen to this crap ...

953thewolf.com.s25961.gridserver.com
 
2013-08-28 12:19:03 PM

Sofa King Smart: sure those kinds of alarm clocks will work for your basic light sleepers... but what about really deep sleepers like me?


It comes in Grizzly too
 
2013-08-28 12:20:40 PM
a wolf with a couple of foxes

i103.photobucket.com
 
2013-08-28 12:21:29 PM
Where's the snooze?
 
2013-08-28 12:22:34 PM
images4.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2013-08-28 12:22:43 PM
ih0.redbubble.net
 
2013-08-28 12:24:51 PM
Camper wakes up to wolf eating his head, worst alarm clock ever

That bites.
 
2013-08-28 12:25:58 PM
subby fail = totally missing the linked article at the bottom of "head chewy" article entitled "Drinker Gulps Down Bar's Prized Toe"

http://www.newser.com/story/173290/drinker-gulps-down-bars-prized-to e. html?utm_source=part&utm_medium=ClearChannel&utm_campaign=wid_gri_tg6_ lat
 
2013-08-28 12:27:11 PM
The King in the North strikes again!
 
2013-08-28 12:29:47 PM
Did a little old lady get mutilated late last night?

/ rip Warren
 
2013-08-28 12:32:55 PM
I bet he wish it was a cougar giving him head instead.
 
2013-08-28 12:34:09 PM
"Noah's reddish-brown hair may have caused the wolf to mistake his head for a smaller creature. "

Even Wolves hate gingers.
 
2013-08-28 12:35:05 PM
Let this be a lesson to furries everywhere: Never ask a real wolf if it wants a little head.

/ask LOTS of wolves instead. You'll up your chances.
 
2013-08-28 12:35:31 PM
I call bullshiate on the story.

Singular wolf came into a camp and attacked a sleeping human during camping (read plentiful food) season? That's about as likely as Fark getting rid of Florida tag because the state's inhabitants all of a sudden all smartened up at the same time.

Aside from the obvious problems with his story... a wolf would go for the throat first. It's in their nature to dispatch the pray first. If you ever watched a dog hunt a dog toy (aka shake it before chewing in it) or observed wolves in their habitat you'd know that it's about as likely as well, it's not.

//CSB time
///I live with three mixed-batch Siberian Huskies that have wolf in them as close as parents
////They weigh in from 65 to 115 lbs and are gentler than most people, let alone any yuppy dog-thing that people bred out
//CSB off
 
ows
2013-08-28 12:37:26 PM
be wild if his name was peter
 
2013-08-28 12:37:45 PM
images2.wikia.nocookie.net

They just sit there while you eat them.  I'm.....going to eat one....right now.
 
2013-08-28 12:42:51 PM
Felicity!
 
2013-08-28 12:43:52 PM
/Slaps and on forehead

Why didn't I think of that for getting my teenager out of bed in time to go to school?

That actually might have worked.

I would have had to have purchased band-aids by the case.
 
2013-08-28 12:46:26 PM
Did anyone ask if he was delicious?
 
2013-08-28 12:47:28 PM
www.nndb.com
 
2013-08-28 12:47:35 PM
In bocca al lupo!
 
2013-08-28 12:49:18 PM

Treygreen13: [450x253 from http://www.robsingleton.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/massive_head_wo und_harry2.jpg image 450x253]


Came for the Massive Headwound Harry. Leaving satisfied
 
2013-08-28 12:49:43 PM

ows: be wild if his name was peter


Wolves, especially wild ones, don't generally have names.
 
2013-08-28 12:50:09 PM
Wait, now - hold it.  I consider myself to be somewhat of an amateur (yet proficient) naturalist.  Having studied cryptozoology, I'm thinking this must be a mutant cross-breed between Werewolves and Big Foots.  (Feets?)

/speed dials agent with new TV show idea  **beep-boop-boop-boopbeep*

//"We're sorry, but your call cannot be completed as dialed"
 
2013-08-28 12:53:49 PM
Hungry like a....well, wolf.
 
2013-08-28 12:54:05 PM
Somebody want to send him one of these?

static.neatoshop.com
 
2013-08-28 12:56:20 PM
www.allaccess.com
 
2013-08-28 12:57:06 PM
Let's go to the videotape.

nyoobserver.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-08-28 12:58:46 PM

Towermonkey: Did a little old lady get mutilated late last night?

/ rip Warren


The wolf was just hungry because Lee Ho Fook's was out of beef chow mein.
 
2013-08-28 12:59:26 PM
What actually woke him up -- the gnawing headache or the bad breath?

And how did he not think it was just a hangover.
 
2013-08-28 01:02:23 PM

James!: Kid's a werewolf now,


i105.photobucket.com
 
2013-08-28 01:09:59 PM

FloydA: James!: Kid's a werewolf now,

[500x255 from http://i105.photobucket.com/albums/m239/floyda/fark%20tags/therecastle .jpg image 500x255]


Not sure if should....
 
2013-08-28 01:15:03 PM
fc01.deviantart.net
 
2013-08-28 01:17:54 PM

outtatowner: I call bullshiate on the story.


I was thinking the same thing, with Newser as the source. But I did find a CBS article about it:

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-201_162-57600272/teen-survives-first-con fi rmed-wolf-attack-in-minn/
 
2013-08-28 01:28:05 PM
i26.photobucket.com
 
2013-08-28 01:30:06 PM
Gerald Ford?
 
2013-08-28 01:41:23 PM
http://www.bringmethenews.com/2013/08/26/teen-attacked-by-wolf-at-nort hern-minn-campground/

With gory head wound piccy goodness.

/on phone, no linky
 
2013-08-28 01:57:23 PM

outtatowner: I call bullshiate on the story.

Singular wolf came into a camp and attacked a sleeping human during camping (read plentiful food) season? That's about as likely as Fark getting rid of Florida tag because the state's inhabitants all of a sudden all smartened up at the same time.

Aside from the obvious problems with his story... a wolf would go for the throat first. It's in their nature to dispatch the pray first. If you ever watched a dog hunt a dog toy (aka shake it before chewing in it) or observed wolves in their habitat you'd know that it's about as likely as well, it's not.

//CSB time
///I live with three mixed-batch Siberian Huskies that have wolf in them as close as parents
////They weigh in from 65 to 115 lbs and are gentler than most people, let alone any yuppy dog-thing that people bred out
//CSB off


Yeah, because nobody ever heard of a wild animal catching rabies or some other disease that results in unusual or erratic behavior and then attacking someone.
 
2013-08-28 02:00:07 PM
Sounds like a lone wolf. Either too old to remain in a pack, and was desperately hungry.

Wolves are usually scared sh*tless of humans. It's the pack mentality that drives them to act brave. But even then, wolf packs aren't going to go after a human unless it's a sure thing.

And, if it was a pack at this kid's tent, he wouldn't have woken up. Period.
 
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