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(Gawker)   US intel agents intercepted phone calls FALSE FLAG from the Syrian Ministry of Defense FALSE FLAG asking their chemical weapons unit who in the fark told them FALSE FLAG to launch a chemical attack on a suburb full of civilians   (gawker.com) divider line 26
    More: Obvious, chemical warfares, Syrians, Syrian Ministry, syrian ministry of defense, special agents, chemical weapons unit, Secretary of State John Kerry, phone calls  
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10868 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Aug 2013 at 8:03 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-08-28 08:22:57 AM
10 votes:
Hello. Welcome to the Syrian Army Headquarters. Your call is important to us. If you would like to speak to someone in authority, please press 1 now. If you would like to order a replacement AK-47, please press 2 now. To initiate an attack on a Syrian neighborhood, please press 3. Se hablbo Espanol, pulse zero.
(Beep)
You have selected "Initiate attack on Syrian Neighborhood". If you want conventional weapons, press 1. For non conventional weapon, wink, wink, press 2.
(beep)
You have selected "Non conventional weapons" United Nations protocols require you leave your Syrian Identification Number as proof of ordering such an attack. Please enter it and press pound when you are done.
(beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, pound)
You have entered "zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero, zero." If this is correct, press pound.
(pound)
Thank you. A non conventional weapon attack has been initiated as requested by you. Please stay on the line. We would like you to complete a short survey to gauge your customer satisfaction...
2013-08-28 08:12:12 AM
5 votes:

paulseta: Ah, the Middle East - where everyone is wrong, and everyone is armed.


and the points don't matter
2013-08-28 08:36:45 AM
3 votes:

xanadian: Seems to me that lately, every time we intervene in the Middle East, we fark it up.


And for geographically challenged farkers, here's a helpful map of the Middle East:

www.nationsonline.org

No, wait, here it is:

www.nationsonline.org

No, damn it. Middle East, Middle East...

cg043.k12.sd.us

There we go.
2013-08-28 08:30:01 AM
3 votes:

pxlboy: illegal.tender: The American people have zero control over the government.

I would agree with that sentiment.


Our control over the government is called voting.
2013-08-28 08:26:02 AM
3 votes:

LandOfChocolate: paulseta: Ah, the Middle East - where everyone is wrong, and everyone is armed.

and the points don't matter


Now here's Netanyahu and Assad doing "Scenes from a Hat."
2013-08-28 05:15:32 AM
3 votes:
Well, good, somebody found the fig leaf to cover America's exit from the pending invasion. And no, subby, the "US Intelligence agents" would never lie to us. We're Americans.
2013-08-28 08:39:32 AM
2 votes:
For the love of God, stay the fark out of Syria.

"The President does not have power under the Constitution to unilaterally authorize a military attack in a situation that does not involve stopping an actual or imminent threat to the nation," Obama in 2008.

lol.
2013-08-28 08:28:25 AM
2 votes:

Slaxl: I still lean toward it being genuine, it's not like the Iraq war claim of 45 minutes, and tenuous stories about yellowcake, and GWB making the claim that Iraq sponsors tourism.


I laughed way too hard at this mistake. I'm imagining Saddam Hussein- the bedraggled one we pulled from the spider hole- exhorting people to come see beautiful Iraq- the historic and lovely river banks of Mesopotamia, the blue mosque, the shelling of innocent Kurds... You know, tourism!
2013-08-28 05:57:36 AM
2 votes:
Ah, the Middle East - where everyone is wrong, and everyone is armed.
2013-08-28 03:48:34 AM
2 votes:
Right... Are we blaming Israel yet or are we blaming this "false flag" operation on ourselves?

If you don't want us to take part in their conflict then you can say it. I'll respect your opinion, I'm luke warm on the idea myself. But this headline is silly.
2013-08-28 02:25:52 PM
1 votes:
Oh my god, way too many words in this thread. Allow me...

img837.imageshack.us

Carry on.
2013-08-28 12:13:49 PM
1 votes:

neversubmit: wingding: America is gearing up its war machine! GO LIBS!!

Can you imagine Cons doing a war protest? Too funny!


Really. I mean, this is a lot like when that Catholic Hospital was fighting a gynecology malpractice lawsuit by saying fetuses weren't people.
2013-08-28 11:32:47 AM
1 votes:

UrukHaiGuyz: I'm really sick of these retarded military misadventures where we confirm to the world that we are, in fact, a bunch of thick-browed gunslinging idiots that can be made the world's tool with amazingly little provocation. Not to mention the opportunity cost in human suffering we could be alleviating instead of dropping bombs.


Maybe do the propaganda thing.  Just fly over Syria all day long dropping satellite photos of where the rebels and Assad forces are, are moving to, and what their forces consist of.  Just constantly give intel  to both sides and the public.
2013-08-28 09:27:14 AM
1 votes:
Assad's commanders believe it was their own attack, but people here know better.
2013-08-28 09:17:24 AM
1 votes:

FullMetalPanda: So did Assad kill Obama's grandma or something because he seems to be the reincarnate of Bush on the lead up to the invasion of Iraq.


No this is even more incompetent and less by the books.
2013-08-28 09:04:26 AM
1 votes:

socoloco: What I find amazing is our "outrage" of the use of chemical weapons (which are generally produced by the U.S. and are basically ineffective at scale). So we'll use cruise missiles, drones and cluster bombs which are far more "humane" to intervene in a civil war at the behest of Israel that will effective further inflame the region.

\fark that


Gas is an evil way to fight. It kills lots of innocent people. Carpet bombing cities has been against the rules for awhile too. This ain't 'Nam, there are rules!
2013-08-28 08:58:55 AM
1 votes:

You'd turn it off when I was halfway across: give me doughnuts: SockMonkeyHolocaust: Just for old times sake, let's get Colin Powell up in front of the UN to make the case that Syria can deploy those weapons in 45... no 25 minutes and they have mobile labs and that's why we don't know where they are but remember Knight Rider? He had that garage in the back of a trailer truck.

Perhaps you'd care to ask him what he thinks about Syria?

Remind me, why should anyone care what that lying shiat-heel's says ever again?

"I have no affection for Mr. Assad. I've dealt with him. I know him. And he is a pathological liar, with respect to my interaction with him," Powell said.

Oh right, comedy.


I'm actually willing to cut Powell a bit of slack on that whole fiasco...I think he was criminally mis-led, rather than deliberately, personally mendacious.  You're right, though, he still has a HUGE credibility gap...someone operating at that level shouldn't be hoodwinked by two-biatchickenhawks.
2013-08-28 08:45:20 AM
1 votes:

DirtyDeadGhostofEbenezerCooke: The SEC has chemical weapons!


Technically, so does anyone who owns a pool, or who has a bunch of cleaning supplies.
2013-08-28 08:41:45 AM
1 votes:
Alex jones says we are toolin up feh war wid dem ruskies...we are through the looking glass ladies and gentlemen!!! Buy all my fear mongering stuff, 5million salary last year for my wife wasnt enough/p>
2013-08-28 08:36:06 AM
1 votes:

ltdanman44: Hundreds of thousands have already died in this conflict and the world does nothing.   Gas a few hundred and now these deaths have more importance and outrage.  Death by bullets, bombs, starvation, and torture still ok though.

/Stuff your sorries in a sack.   Humans beings don't deserve this planet.


Welp... sounds like the Syrians are eliminating them as fast as they can.
2013-08-28 08:32:54 AM
1 votes:

paulseta: Ah, the Middle East - where everyone is wrong, and everyone is armed.


This same sentence applies to Texas and Florida
2013-08-28 08:31:41 AM
1 votes:

Frederick: violentsalvation: Right... Are we blaming Israel yet or are we blaming this "false flag" operation on ourselves?

If you don't want us to take part in their conflict then you can say it. I'll respect your opinion, I'm luke warm on the idea myself. But this headline is silly.

No such things as "False Flags"?  Or just that this wasnt a false flag?

Not Subby, but the headline isnt silly -it's a reasonable scrutiny atm.


Reasonable scrutiny isn't claiming "false flag".

Of course when dealing with a guy who "has a lot of questions" about the holocaust, that is perfectly normal.
2013-08-28 08:18:41 AM
1 votes:

TenJed_77: Not our problem! We should mot be the police of the world. As it really only causes regional instability, regional countries should intervene if need be. Besides it is another damned if you do, damned if you don't situations.


I'd like to try a damned if we don't.
2013-08-28 08:17:48 AM
1 votes:

tkwasny: It's all about getting British and American planes in the air over the region so the AMERICAN SAMs spirited through Bengazi by AMERICANS can be used to shoot down AMERICAN planes to foster enough outrage to start the "big one" for economic purposes. War will get the world out of debt by killing all the people that everyone owes money to.


You had me at debt.

LET'S DO THIS!
2013-08-28 08:16:19 AM
1 votes:

tkwasny: It's all about getting British and American planes in the air over the region so the AMERICAN SAMs spirited through Bengazi by AMERICANS can be used to shoot down AMERICAN planes to foster enough outrage to start the "big one" for economic purposes. War will get the world out of debt by killing all the people that everyone owes money to.


Wow you're blowing the lid off of this thing.
2013-08-28 08:08:42 AM
1 votes:
Just for old times sake, let's get Colin Powell up in front of the UN to make the case that Syria can deploy those weapons in 45... no 25 minutes and they have mobile labs and that's why we don't know where they are but remember Knight Rider? He had that garage in the back of a trailer truck.
 
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