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(Komo)   "A wheelchair-bound man was bludgeoned with a tub of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter last Wednesday in South Lake Union"   (komonews.com) divider line 58
    More: Strange, South Lake Union, food fights, butter, Seattle Police  
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2708 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Aug 2013 at 8:30 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



58 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-08-27 08:31:20 PM
I can't believe it's not a baseball bat?
 
2013-08-27 08:31:55 PM
 
2013-08-27 08:32:56 PM
Is this the end result of a mad lib? Because when you do one of those at least one of the words HAS to be Penis.
 
2013-08-27 08:33:10 PM
Does he believe it is not butter now?
 
2013-08-27 08:33:15 PM
It's nice that there is less saturated fat, but it's way too assaulty.
 
2013-08-27 08:33:45 PM
Will the attacker be charged with assault and buttery?
 
2013-08-27 08:33:56 PM
So it's a case of assault but not buttery.
 
2013-08-27 08:34:00 PM
parkay?
cps-static.rovicorp.com
 
2013-08-27 08:34:03 PM
Attacking another person with imitation butter, it's a slippery slope.  I guarantee you, if they don't nip this is the bud, his next victim is going to find themselves on the receiving end of a vicious Velveeta log.
 
2013-08-27 08:34:32 PM
Typical Seattle, real butter would be unhealthy
 
2013-08-27 08:34:36 PM
Seattle only gets about six weeks of decent weather a year, and they're coming to an end.  What else can you expect?
 
2013-08-27 08:35:59 PM
Paula Dean chose the form of the Destructor?
 
2013-08-27 08:36:40 PM
30" rims? On a wheelchair? Oh, holy sh*t.
 
2013-08-27 08:37:24 PM
Someone needs to find that writer and increase his medication.
 
2013-08-27 08:39:24 PM
So horrible...my uncle went the same way...
 
2013-08-27 08:40:13 PM
You got my Cheez-Whiz, boy?
 
2013-08-27 08:41:20 PM

Incontinent_dog_and_monkey_rodeo: So it's a case of assault but not buttery.


The guy just lives outside the margarines of acceptable behavior.
 
2013-08-27 08:42:38 PM
What a Country Crock...
 
2013-08-27 08:44:06 PM
I can't believe it's not battery.
 
2013-08-27 08:44:40 PM
See this is what not believing gets you. If only he believed, this wouldn't have happened.
 
2013-08-27 08:45:03 PM
Move over butter, cause Imma slap this gimpy beeeyatch upside the head with some I can't believe it's not butter.
 
2013-08-27 08:45:18 PM
I can't believe it's not battery.
 
2013-08-27 08:45:42 PM
You want the butter?  You can't handle the butter.
 
2013-08-27 08:45:57 PM

Cybernetic: I can't believe it's not battery.


Shakes tiny fist at Ramien
 
2013-08-27 08:49:18 PM
I guess you could say he was whipped
 
2013-08-27 08:54:26 PM
At least it wasnt Capitol Hill, amirite, Seattleites?
 
2013-08-27 08:54:43 PM
Pic from the scene:

img706.imageshack.us

/ had no idea he was wheelchair bound; poor bastard.
 
2013-08-27 08:56:57 PM
Should've rode the SLUT instead...
 
2013-08-27 08:59:22 PM
farm6.static.flickr.com

Ya got my Cheez Whiz, boy?
 
2013-08-27 09:04:47 PM
The second bit of the story has a woman spraying a baby with soy sauce and chocolate milk. Sounds like a Rachel Ray recipe.
 
2013-08-27 09:08:07 PM
i.walmartimages.com
 
2013-08-27 09:09:46 PM
He tried to fool Mother Nature.

Not nice, that.
 
2013-08-27 09:11:17 PM
bludgeoned seems a bit much
 
2013-08-27 09:16:34 PM
I'm sure the perp is toast
 
2013-08-27 09:16:39 PM
That sentence has never been seen in the history of the universe. Evar
 
2013-08-27 09:26:09 PM
It's jungle love, oleoleo
 
2013-08-27 09:28:42 PM

geekbikerskum: It's jungle love, oleoleo


Driving me mad, making me crazy.
 
2013-08-27 09:37:11 PM
Officers arrived to find the victim covered in the imitation butter.

a 52-year-old woman was arrested Saturday on suspicion of covering an International District restaurant's customers, including a baby, with soy sauce and chocolate milk.


i14.photobucket.com
 
2013-08-27 09:49:14 PM
I can't believe nobody else went there...

I rode the trolley and she was great.

/S.L.U.T
 
2013-08-27 10:00:20 PM

geekbikerskum: It's jungle love, oleoleo


This, but followed by "Huhhhh"
 
2013-08-27 10:01:26 PM

fusillade762: Officers arrived to find the victim covered in the imitation butter.

a 52-year-old woman was arrested Saturday on suspicion of covering an International District restaurant's customers, including a baby, with soy sauce and chocolate milk.


Imitation is the most sincerest form of buttery.
 
2013-08-27 10:01:58 PM
Lucky guy. Because he is disabled, he gets free rides on the SLUT.
 
2013-08-27 10:06:44 PM

mrEdude: bludgeoned seems a bit much


Battered, perhaps.
 
2013-08-27 10:19:03 PM
I have a Walmart scene stuck in my mind of a pair of land walruses, one in a rascal one on a walker, arguing about which brand of margarine to get in the five pound bucket. I just wanted to go and say "PUT IT DOWN!"
 
2013-08-27 10:38:09 PM
 
2013-08-27 10:43:59 PM
 
2013-08-27 10:51:04 PM
You know who else liked synthetic butter?

www.currieddogfart.com
 
2013-08-27 11:07:22 PM
Is this like a new thing?
Rule 34?
 
2013-08-27 11:15:07 PM
When you outlaw butter, only outlaws will have I can't believe it's not butter.
 
2013-08-27 11:21:10 PM
evolvestar.com
 
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