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(News Daily)   France is "ready to punish" Syria, presumably by halting exports of brie and Château Margaux   (newsdaily.com) divider line 7
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1798 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Aug 2013 at 3:44 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-08-27 03:51:50 PM  
4 votes:
I am sure that France thinks that it is lost past overdue that the United States does something about this.

Everyone rips on us.  Until they need us...
2013-08-27 03:52:40 PM  
3 votes:
Someone needs to post it:

-Gallic Wars
- Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. [Or at ths time in history, a Roman -ed.]

-Hundred Years War
- Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman." Sainted.

-Italian Wars
- Lost. France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians.

-Wars of Religion
- France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots

-Thirty Years War
- France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her.

-War of Revolution
- Tied. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux.

-The Dutch War
- Tied

-War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War
- Lost, but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power.

-War of the Spanish Succession
- Lost. The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since.

-American Revolution
- In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting."

-French Revolution
- Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.

-The Napoleonic Wars
- Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer.

-The Franco-Prussian War
- Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.

-World War I
- Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States [Entering the war late -ed.]. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.

-World War II
- Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.

-War in Indochina
- Lost. French forces plead sickness; take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu

-Algerian Rebellion
- Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux.
2013-08-27 07:44:26 PM  
1 votes:

Highroller48: Seriously, though, the Charles De Gaulle is a pretty badass ship.



It's a French, union-labor fiasco.

The thing took forever to build at many times its projected cost.  It had to be towed back to dock after it's first sea trial because the propeller fell off.  In fact, it's slower than the ship it replaced because the company that made the propellers for it went Solyndra-style bankrupt.  It had to be fitted with cannibalized propellers from another ship.

The reactor is all f*cked up and is over-dosing the crew with radiation and it can NOT be removed and replaced.  Even worse, the flight deck can't handle the specific aircraft is was designed to carry so they've had to try and alter it with some expensive and questionable 'customizing'.

It's like Obama designed it or something...
2013-08-27 05:39:41 PM  
1 votes:

ChuDogg: Not surprising considering France is essentially a sunni islamic State by now.


[450x272 from http://www.religiousfreedomcoalition.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/Fr ench-Election.jpg image 450x272]


Yep, yep, yep. Five to 10 percent of the country are Muslim (Higher number based on country of origin, not actual religious preference), so it's essentially a Muslim state. Same as the United States is essentially a Mormon country.
2013-08-27 05:30:58 PM  
1 votes:

nemisonic: abfalter: Someone needs to post it:

-Gallic Wars
- Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. [Or at ths time in history, a Roman -ed.]
...

-War in Indochina
- Lost. French forces plead sickness; take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu

-Algerian Rebellion
- Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux.

You forgot Vietnam. France started it and walked away after hooking/tricking the US to enter the theater.

//Syria will be same diff.


Indochina (Indochine) is what the French called Vietnam.
2013-08-27 03:56:15 PM  
1 votes:
If there's one thing the French love, it's killing people in former colonies.
2013-08-27 03:34:40 PM  
1 votes:
See? The smell in Syria isn't from chemical weapons. France was simply farting in their general direction. Wind and sea currents. Study it out.
 
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