If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(NBC Washington)   Washington DC will bid on the 2024 Olympics. Plans include lighting the Olympic flame only after an 11th hour House resolution to pay the gas bill for the cauldron   (nbcwashington.com) divider line 59
    More: Silly, Olympic Flame, Summer Olympics, olympics, Washington DC, Paralympic Games, U.S. Olympic Committee  
•       •       •

436 clicks; posted to Politics » on 27 Aug 2013 at 3:43 PM (45 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



59 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-08-27 12:38:06 PM
Politically themed Olympic sports:  GO!

Synchronized Gerrymandering
400M Senate Confirmation Relay
Phantom Border Patrol Triathlon

...any others?
 
2013-08-27 12:41:59 PM
But only on the condition that Obamacare be defunded
 
2013-08-27 12:47:20 PM
They won't get it. Washington is sick of Kenyans winning important races.
 
2013-08-27 12:50:38 PM
With our roads? They'll have to deport all the foreign athletes for overstaying their visas when it takes them three months just to get to the airport.
 
2013-08-27 01:09:32 PM
It was either Washington DC, or Detroit.

Don't complain.
 
2013-08-27 01:36:49 PM

ManateeGag: They won't get it. Washington is sick of Kenyans winning important races.


LMAO.  Will all foreign athletes be required to show long form birth certifs in order to play?
 
2013-08-27 01:43:54 PM

Grand_Moff_Joseph: ManateeGag: They won't get it. Washington is sick of Kenyans winning important races.

LMAO.  Will all foreign athletes be required to show long form birth certifs in order to play?


yes.  As well as college transcripts, high school records, medical records and tax returns going back 10 years.
 
2013-08-27 01:56:54 PM
Congress is already hosting the special olympics, why do they need the regular ones?
 
2013-08-27 01:59:43 PM
Good christ, can you imagine the over-the-top paranoid security measures for an event that big in DC? You might as well just leave your clothes at home and bring your own speculum.
 
2013-08-27 02:00:27 PM
Better DC than Chicago. There was no way Chicago was going to pay for that without borrowing money from the already broke State of Illinois.
 
2013-08-27 02:28:14 PM

ManateeGag: Grand_Moff_Joseph: ManateeGag: They won't get it. Washington is sick of Kenyans winning important races.

LMAO.  Will all foreign athletes be required to show long form birth certifs in order to play?

yes.  As well as college transcripts, high school records, medical records and tax returns going back 10 years.


And birth announcements in their respective local newspapers.
 
2013-08-27 02:33:52 PM

Grand_Moff_Joseph: Politically themed Olympic sports:  GO!

Synchronized Gerrymandering
400M Senate Confirmation Relay
Phantom Border Patrol Triathlon

...any others?


I'd go with events based on historical events in Washington:
graphics8.nytimes.com
Team Arson

www.history.com
Caning (singles)

blueandgraytrail.com
Caning (doubles)

ic.pics.livejournal.com
Balcony Jump

img.timeinc.net
Tidal Basin swimming

img.washingtonpost.com
Public sex

Just a few ideas...
 
2013-08-27 03:22:37 PM

Grand_Moff_Joseph: Politically themed Olympic sports:  GO!

Synchronized Gerrymandering
400M Senate Confirmation Relay
Phantom Border Patrol Triathlon

...any others?


Synchronized Talking Heads
 
2013-08-27 03:26:27 PM
Outside of being our capitol, I can't think of one good reason to have the games there.  Traffic and weather alone should rule them out.

I consulted up there for 6 years.  My colleagues used to ask me how I could stand the heat and humidity in FL during the summer.  I honestly thought it was worse up there.  The air quality is awful and it just sits and hangs like a death shroud.  At least the air down here moves.
 
2013-08-27 03:46:35 PM
I think this would be great for DC, the cost of the Olympics is typically paid back six or seven fold.  Once the Olympics are over there are dozens and dozens of profitable uses for the buildings and fields.  Win-Win
 
2013-08-27 03:50:20 PM

naughtyrev: Congress is the special olympics, why do they need the regular ones?


There.  Fixed it.
 
2013-08-27 03:50:27 PM
Oh, that's cool. Just this morning I was thinking to myself how great it would be if they could find a way to make traffic even worse around here.
 
2013-08-27 03:50:55 PM
Sweet Jeebus, no!

I'm already trying to figure out how to get to work and back tomorrow with the march. Three weeks of Olympics-related disruption would be too much to bear.
 
2013-08-27 03:51:01 PM
Any politician or city officials who bids on the Ol-limp-dicks needs to be prosecuted for embezzlement of taxpayer monies.

/At least put it to a real public voter vote on whether to spend $8 billion on trashing your city for a couple of months and the nightmares of what to do with over-sized shoddy built venues later.
 
2013-08-27 03:51:52 PM

Cheron: I think this would be great for DC, the cost of the Olympics is typically paid back six or seven fold.  Once the Olympics are over there are dozens and dozens of profitable uses for the buildings and fields.  Win-Win


This is a joke, right? It must be a joke.
 
2013-08-27 03:54:17 PM

Wellon Dowd: Sweet Jeebus, no!

I'm already trying to figure out how to get to work and back tomorrow with the march. Three weeks of Olympics-related disruption would be too much to bear.


Three weeks?  You think they just fly in and then leave?  Think years of construction and preparation.
 
2013-08-27 03:56:14 PM

Grand_Moff_Joseph: Politically themed Olympic sports:  GO!

Synchronized Gerrymandering
400M Senate Confirmation Relay
Phantom Border Patrol Triathlon

...any others?


Border Fence High Jump
Legislative Pentathlon.  That's competing in filing pork amendments to bills, filibustering, pandering, town halls, and taking bribes.
100m Lobbyist Dash
 
2013-08-27 04:02:11 PM
And expose our terrible Metro system to the world?!

Oh god, I don't think I could take third world countries making fun of the fact that none of the escalators work. The shame.

Also, I wonder how many times we'd hear, "Well, we're waiting for the athletes from Country Y because their team bus is stuck on the inner loop. WTOP reports they may arrive five hours from now, or 20 minutes if they walk."
 
2013-08-27 04:03:15 PM

YixilTesiphon: Cheron: I think this would be great for DC, the cost of the Olympics is typically paid back six or seven fold.  Once the Olympics are over there are dozens and dozens of profitable uses for the buildings and fields.  Win-Win

This is a joke, right? It must be a joke.


I really hope so.

Otherwise it's time to pee in a cup because he's obviously stoned out of his gourd.
 
2013-08-27 04:07:19 PM
The Olympic Flame will not be gas powered, as that is not green. Instead it will be filled with burning sustainable horse shiat.
 
2013-08-27 04:18:50 PM

YixilTesiphon: Cheron: I think this would be great for DC, the cost of the Olympics is typically paid back six or seven fold.  Once the Olympics are over there are dozens and dozens of profitable uses for the buildings and fields.  Win-Win

This is a joke, right? It must be a joke.


Six or seven fold, no, but the United States' most recent Olympics brought considerable positive changes to the cities that hosted them. The run-down area where they put the Olympic Centennial Park in Atlanta is now a tremendously hot property that's revitalized a whole section of the city, and Salt Lake City saw a serious boom - and was break-even just from immediate Olympic revenues. Los Angeles in 1984 saw a $200 million profit.

Hosting the Olympic Games can revitalize a city. Greece and Montreal are examples of what not to do, but that doesn't mean that every Games will be like that.
 
2013-08-27 04:19:57 PM
400m single-tracking

/farking red line
 
2013-08-27 04:21:45 PM

Spade: Oh god, I don't think I could take third world countries making fun of the fact that none of the escalators work. The shame.


I was mentioning to Mrs Servo yesterday that DC needs some East European escalator engineers, so they can run continuously at 30mph, with only the occasional casualty.
 
2013-08-27 04:22:47 PM
Security will be easy. Each spectator gets a personal "Olympic Guard Buddy" who walks around pressing a gun against the spectator's temple.

Well, it'll be easier than installing gun turrets on every rooftop, anyway.
 
2013-08-27 04:24:15 PM

Spade: And expose our terrible Metro system to the world?!

Oh god, I don't think I could take third world countries making fun of the fact that none of the escalators work. The shame.

Also, I wonder how many times we'd hear, "Well, we're waiting for the athletes from Country Y because their team bus is stuck on the inner loop. WTOP reports they may arrive five hours from now, or 20 minutes if they walk."


Actually, I like this for that reason- a lot of money tends to get dumped into things for the olympics. It never turns a profit, but who cares? It would be a big kick in the pants for public investment, and could result in the political will and money for a lot of desperately needed investments. You fold replacing RFK (getting the Washington football team back in the district), a new metro line with lots of new tunnels (call it the rainbow line, after the rings,and to stick a finger in the eye of Russia), lots of road work, development east of the river, so on and so forth all into the Olympic budget. Stuff happens that needs to happen anyway, and the DC area can benefit for years to come.
 
2013-08-27 04:25:26 PM

Tax Boy: 400m single-tracking

/farking red line


6 weeks of no tracking coming soon to a red line near you!
 
2013-08-27 04:25:59 PM

Tax Boy: 400m single-tracking

/farking red line


images.cdn.filmclub.org
I'd pay good money to see that.

/hoping this isn't obscure
 
2013-08-27 04:33:53 PM

Cheron: I think this would be great for DC, the cost of the Olympics is typically paid back six or seven fold.  Once the Olympics are over there are dozens and dozens of profitable uses for the buildings and fields.  Win-Win


farm6.staticflickr.com
 
2013-08-27 04:41:09 PM

Millennium: With our roads? They'll have to deport all the foreign athletes for overstaying their visas when it takes them three months just to get to the airport.


I will be teleworking for the three months preceding, if this goes through.  God help us.
 
2013-08-27 04:41:51 PM
That's just what DC needs. An influx of fit attractive young men and women for our Congressmen (and women) to skeeze on.

They should only do this if they'll set aside money to throw chastity belts on every member of congress.
 
2013-08-27 04:43:34 PM
Team and men's and women's singles in Filibustering.
 
2013-08-27 04:49:56 PM

Wellon Dowd: Sweet Jeebus, no!

I'm already trying to figure out how to get to work and back tomorrow with the march. Three weeks of Olympics-related disruption would be too much to bear.


It'd last a lot longer than three weeks, particularly when you factor in the Paralympics as well.
 
2013-08-27 04:52:46 PM

captainktainer: Hosting the Olympic Games can revitalize a city.


Detroit should start working on a bid.
 
2013-08-27 05:11:20 PM
Hopes to win gold in the 1000m PR Spin event.
www.welovetheiraqiinformationminister.com
/hot
 
2013-08-27 05:13:14 PM

The Numbers: captainktainer: Hosting the Olympic Games can revitalize a city.

Detroit should start working on a bid.


It's so crazy, it might work.
 
2013-08-27 05:13:53 PM

ManateeGag: They won't get it. Washington is sick of Kenyans winning important races.


Holy shiat that's funny! Thanks!
 
2013-08-27 05:16:13 PM
oh heeeeeerlllllzzz to the no
I don't want a bunch of foreign dbag tourists in my Backyard!
 
2013-08-27 05:16:36 PM
Just don't be surprised if we catch Marion Barry copping a light off the Olympic Flame.

"Biathlon set me up!"
 
2013-08-27 05:20:35 PM

gopher321: It was either Washington DC, or Detroit.

Don't complain.


Please, then let it be Detroit!  We don't need that crap around here, we have enough problems!
 
2013-08-27 05:49:14 PM
Not just no. Not just hell no.  But farking fark FARK no.
 
2013-08-27 05:54:17 PM
Rent out the house and go on holiday for the month.
 
2013-08-27 06:19:17 PM

Grand_Moff_Joseph: Politically themed Olympic sports:  GO!

Synchronized Gerrymandering
400M Senate Confirmation Relay
Phantom Border Patrol Triathlon

...any others?


1000m appropriations hurdles
 
2013-08-27 06:44:31 PM

Cheron: I think this would be great for DC, the cost of the Olympics is typically paid back six or seven fold.  Once the Olympics are over there are dozens and dozens of profitable uses for the buildings and fields.  Win-Win


You haven't researched what has happened to the facilities of the last few summer games, have you?
 
2013-08-27 06:48:55 PM

FrancoFile: Synchronized Talking Heads


michiganleftblog.com  michiganleftblog.com
 
2013-08-27 07:26:30 PM

ManateeGag: They won't get it. Washington is sick of Kenyans winning important races.


Golf Clap
 
Displayed 50 of 59 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report