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(Washington Post)   Smart ass Middle Eastern blogger comes up with a quick and easy graphic for understanding the Middle East. The take home message? Nobody likes Iran   (washingtonpost.com) divider line 136
    More: Interesting, Iran, General Sisi, security studies, Middle East  
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8555 clicks; posted to Politics » on 26 Aug 2013 at 3:27 PM (45 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-08-26 01:53:38 PM
In fairness, the Iranian government IS sort of douchey, but then again, if you had the most progressive of democracies in the Middle East and had the US and Great Britain yank that out from under you, you'd probably be a little miffed too...
 
2013-08-26 02:04:56 PM
This means that the US should definitely intervene in Syria. And Egypt. And then bomb Iran.
 
2013-08-26 02:08:29 PM
I've felt for a long time that Iran is one benevolent leader away from being an inspiration to the entire region.  The problem is with that "benevolent" part.
 
2013-08-26 02:09:27 PM
I think there should probably be a lot more "has no clue" flying around there in a lot of different directions.
 
2013-08-26 02:17:20 PM
There's only one arrow pointing to Israel and that's from the US. Graphic is incomplete.
 
2013-08-26 02:24:16 PM

Elandriel: I've felt for a long time that Iran is one benevolent leader away from being an inspiration to the entire region.  The problem is with that "benevolent" part.


I don't think so. Arab and Persian cultures have been at odds for a very long time. They'd still hate Iran. And not just because they're Shia.
 
2013-08-26 02:30:20 PM

hubiestubert: In fairness, the Iranian government IS sort of douchey, but then again, if you had the most progressive of democracies in the Middle East and had the US and Great Britain yank that out from under you, you'd probably be a little miffed too...


Sort of? Yes, yes, Operation Ajax and all of that. But the Iranian regime has more than multiplied its own douchbaggery many times over. Angry at colonial powers and long-term unforseen consequences? Sure of course. But that doesn't explain all the assholery to everyone else there, or the war with Iraq and all that.
 
wee [TotalFark]
2013-08-26 02:37:52 PM

Somacandra: I don't think so. Arab and Persian cultures have been at odds for a very long time. They'd still hate Iran. And not just because they're Shia.


Seems like a lot of people think Iranians are Arabs when in reality only a very small percentage are.
 
2013-08-26 02:41:41 PM

wee: Somacandra: I don't think so. Arab and Persian cultures have been at odds for a very long time. They'd still hate Iran. And not just because they're Shia.

Seems like a lot of people think Iranians are Arabs when in reality only a very small percentage are.


The Egyptians think they are Arabs, when in reality they are Africans.
 
2013-08-26 02:42:49 PM
Chart boils down to internal factions (Sunni hate Shia and visa versa) and the meddlers, the United States, Iran, Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Turkey and Israel (who are mostly involved in where the Natural Gas pipelines go). But where are the Kurds in this picture?
 
2013-08-26 02:45:47 PM
Oh, the Protestants hate the Catholics,
And the Catholics hate the Protestants,
And the Hindus hate the Muslims,
And everybody hates the Jews.
 
2013-08-26 02:46:05 PM

Somacandra: Elandriel: I've felt for a long time that Iran is one benevolent leader away from being an inspiration to the entire region.  The problem is with that "benevolent" part.

I don't think so. Arab and Persian cultures have been at odds for a very long time. They'd still hate Iran. And not just because they're Shia.


Came here to say this and laugh. The only time that the muslim world unites is to biatch about some evil that the great satan committed. fark em all
 
2013-08-26 02:47:32 PM

simplicimus: Chart boils down to internal factions (Sunni hate Shia and visa versa) and the meddlers, the United States, Iran, Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Turkey and Israel (who are mostly involved in where the Natural Gas pipelines go). But where are the Kurds in this picture?


Everybody hates the Kurds. That's rule one if the Middle East. The Kurds are a coherent ethnic block that has been agitating - often militantly - for their own country, carved out of at least three others, for decades. What's not to hate?
 
2013-08-26 02:54:53 PM

Elegy: simplicimus: Chart boils down to internal factions (Sunni hate Shia and visa versa) and the meddlers, the United States, Iran, Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Turkey and Israel (who are mostly involved in where the Natural Gas pipelines go). But where are the Kurds in this picture?

Everybody hates the Kurds. That's rule one if the Middle East. The Kurds are a coherent ethnic block that has been agitating - often militantly - for their own country, carved out of at least three others, for decades. What's not to hate?


Then the Kurdish areas must be sitting on some natural resources, else who would care? Except Turkey losing a part of the country outside of resource considerations?
 
2013-08-26 02:58:05 PM

simplicimus: Chart boils down to internal factions (Sunni hate Shia and visa versa) and the meddlers, the United States, Iran, Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Turkey and Israel (who are mostly involved in where the Natural Gas pipelines go). But where are the Kurds in this picture?


Whey over there
 
2013-08-26 03:00:27 PM
I disagree.  While it wasn't my favorite 80s tune, I thought I Ran was decent enough.
 
2013-08-26 03:02:58 PM

I_Am_Weasel: I disagree.  While it wasn't my favorite 80s tune, I thought I Ran was decent enough.


Flock off.
 
2013-08-26 03:23:10 PM
Farking Britian.

had they just listend to Lawrence, and  carved the ME into a few big countries, One for the Kurds, One for the Shia, one for the Sunnis, and just called it a day, think of of peaceful and prosperous the ME might be now...
 
2013-08-26 03:25:00 PM

ecmoRandomNumbers: There's only one arrow pointing to Israel and that's from the US. Graphic is incomplete.


And it doesn't say how Iran feels about Israel.
 
2013-08-26 03:31:43 PM

Elandriel: I've felt for a long time that Iran is one benevolent leader away from being an inspiration to the entire region.  The problem is with that "benevolent" part.


Mohammed Mossadegh is shouting furiously from the grave.
 
2013-08-26 03:33:18 PM
Nobody hates us!  Whoopie!
 
2013-08-26 03:35:23 PM
Not nearly enough red arrows.
 
2013-08-26 03:35:28 PM

Magorn: Farking Britian.

had they just listend to Lawrence, and  carved the ME into a few big countries, One for the Kurds, One for the Shia, one for the Sunnis, and just called it a day, think of of peaceful and prosperous the ME might be now...


Wasn't that the point, as in we are being driven out so as a parting FU we shall carve you up in such away that you will be forever at each others throats?
 
2013-08-26 03:35:59 PM

NuttierThanEver: simplicimus: Chart boils down to internal factions (Sunni hate Shia and visa versa) and the meddlers, the United States, Iran, Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Turkey and Israel (who are mostly involved in where the Natural Gas pipelines go). But where are the Kurds in this picture?

Whey over there


*Nice*
 
2013-08-26 03:38:33 PM
That is perhaps the worst formatted chart I've ever seen
 
2013-08-26 03:38:56 PM
Personally, I have no problem with Iran. The Iranian government on the other can suck hairy donkey balls and should DIAF.
 
2013-08-26 03:39:52 PM
The ME carved themselves up into many political entities long before Europeans arrived.
 
2013-08-26 03:39:55 PM
Sounds like they need another WWI and then redraw borders from scratch.
 
2013-08-26 03:40:30 PM

Lost Thought 00: That is perhaps the worst formatted chart I've ever seen


Really who the hell does blue arrows and bluish green arrow.
 
2013-08-26 03:40:32 PM

Elandriel: I've felt for a long time that Iran is one benevolent leader away from being an inspiration to the entire region.  The problem is with that "benevolent" part.


Yep. But they can't, or won't, elect one.
 
2013-08-26 03:40:35 PM
This is nobody's business
 
2013-08-26 03:42:36 PM

cgraves67: ecmoRandomNumbers: There's only one arrow pointing to Israel and that's from the US. Graphic is incomplete.

And it doesn't say how Iran feels about Israel.


Also, it has a red line showing that Israel hates Hamas with no corresponding line showing that Hamas hates Israel. Is it because Hamas just ignores Israel entirely? Israel has 4 connections: the US supports them, Israel hates Assad and supports the rebels, and Israel hates Hamas. There should be a red line connecting just about every entity there with Israel save the US' (which is blue) and Russia (which'd change colors depending on whether it's Israel pissing off a Russian ally or doing military business with Russia).

I think if all those lines were included, and shaded for the intensity of the support/hatred, it'd look like a purplish mess. Maybe he was being expeditious by including only seething, burning angers.

// maybe the region just needs some - BOOM! - tough-actin Tinactin
// to soothe the burning
 
2013-08-26 03:42:54 PM

neversubmit: Magorn: Farking Britian.

had they just listend to Lawrence, and  carved the ME into a few big countries, One for the Kurds, One for the Shia, one for the Sunnis, and just called it a day, think of of peaceful and prosperous the ME might be now...

Wasn't that the point, as in we are being driven out so as a parting FU we shall carve you up in such away that you will be forever at each others throats?


But it worked so perfectly with India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, and Kashmir!
 
2013-08-26 03:42:56 PM
How come all the "has no clue" arrows emanate from the USA?

/haz a clue
 
2013-08-26 03:44:55 PM

Brick-House: Personally, I have no problem with Iran. The Iranian government on the other can suck hairy donkey balls and should DIAF.


Since I believe, as previously stated above, that Iran couldn't care less about arabs in general, I think the US could start normalizing relationships with Iran. I am less afraid of a potential nuclear power in Iran than I am of an actual nuclear power in Pakistan.
 
2013-08-26 03:45:59 PM

simplicimus: Then the Kurdish areas must be sitting on some natural resources, else who would care? Except Turkey losing a part of the country outside of resource considerations?


The Kurds do have some substantial oil reserves, but that's mostly in the Iraqi Kurdistan section which is fairly autonomous anyway.

Turkey, Iran, and Syria more simply don't want to lose ground to the Kurds. Not that there is a clear geographical Kurd/non-Kurd line. It would also suck for the respective regimes to not have them as a scapegoat.

/ and everbody hates the Kurds!
// It's.... National Brotherhood Week...
 
2013-08-26 03:48:09 PM
The Big Pharaoh put together this chart

InigoMontoya.jpg
 
2013-08-26 03:48:13 PM

neversubmit: Magorn: Farking Britian.

had they just listend to Lawrence, and  carved the ME into a few big countries, One for the Kurds, One for the Shia, one for the Sunnis, and just called it a day, think of of peaceful and prosperous the ME might be now...

Wasn't that the point, as in we are being driven out so as a parting FU we shall carve you up in such away that you will be forever at each others throats?


This. It was a feature, not a bug.
 
2013-08-26 03:48:39 PM

simplicimus: Brick-House: Personally, I have no problem with Iran. The Iranian government on the other can suck hairy donkey balls and should DIAF.

Since I believe, as previously stated above, that Iran couldn't care less about arabs in general, I think the US could start normalizing relationships with Iran. I am less afraid of a potential nuclear power in Iran than I am of an actual nuclear power in Pakistan.


That's racist.

Also fairly true.

/Eery Persian I ever knew hated being conflated with Arabs
 
2013-08-26 03:49:14 PM
that was a bit hard to read so I sharpened it up

i.imgur.com
 
2013-08-26 03:49:15 PM
You want to understand the middle east?

The entire region is completely farked up in the head.

There.
 
2013-08-26 03:49:46 PM

EvilEgg: wee: Somacandra: I don't think so. Arab and Persian cultures have been at odds for a very long time. They'd still hate Iran. And not just because they're Shia.

Seems like a lot of people think Iranians are Arabs when in reality only a very small percentage are.

The Egyptians think they are Arabs, when in reality they are Africans.


??

Every Egyptian I've met was Arab.
 
2013-08-26 03:50:01 PM
I can't take seriously someone who won't spend 10 minutes to learn graphviz and produce a readable graph, but will unleash unreadable powerpoint shiat instead.
 
2013-08-26 03:52:06 PM

jigger: This means that the US should definitely intervene in Syria. And Egypt. And then bomb Iran.


you say the same thing when smart ass american bloggers come up with quick and easy graphic of lolcats.
 
2013-08-26 03:53:29 PM
So, Israel supports the Syrian rebels?

Is that why Wolf Blitzer and the rest of AIPAC's PR division ("mainstream" media) is trumpeting this line about Assad using chemical weapons with absolutely no proof? About all we're missing here for a sequel to the Iraq War runup is Judith Miller.

Obama will do what he has to do in order to not be Lewinsky'd all over TV.
 
2013-08-26 03:53:41 PM

Dr Dreidel: cgraves67: ecmoRandomNumbers: There's only one arrow pointing to Israel and that's from the US. Graphic is incomplete.

And it doesn't say how Iran feels about Israel.

Also, it has a red line showing that Israel hates Hamas with no corresponding line showing that Hamas hates Israel. Is it because Hamas just ignores Israel entirely? Israel has 4 connections: the US supports them, Israel hates Assad and supports the rebels, and Israel hates Hamas. There should be a red line connecting just about every entity there with Israel save the US' (which is blue) and Russia (which'd change colors depending on whether it's Israel pissing off a Russian ally or doing military business with Russia).

I think if all those lines were included, and shaded for the intensity of the support/hatred, it'd look like a purplish mess. Maybe he was being expeditious by including only seething, burning angers.

// maybe the region just needs some - BOOM! - tough-actin Tinactin
// to soothe the burning


I think that the lines are supposed to be bi-directional even though there's only an arrow on one end.
 
2013-08-26 03:53:43 PM
All Middle East nations aspire to be like Iran..... By telling Israel and the U.S.A. to go f*ck themselves for all eternity and stop overthrowing Middles East governments.

/Oil is one hell of a drug.
 
2013-08-26 03:54:21 PM

simplicimus: Elegy: simplicimus: Chart boils down to internal factions (Sunni hate Shia and visa versa) and the meddlers, the United States, Iran, Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Turkey and Israel (who are mostly involved in where the Natural Gas pipelines go). But where are the Kurds in this picture?

Everybody hates the Kurds. That's rule one if the Middle East. The Kurds are a coherent ethnic block that has been agitating - often militantly - for their own country, carved out of at least three others, for decades. What's not to hate?

Then the Kurdish areas must be sitting on some natural resources, else who would care? Except Turkey losing a part of the country outside of resource considerations?


They are.  The northern oil fields in Iraq are the first reason we didn't want Iraq to split up after we decided Sadam had to go.  The Kurds would have gladly declared Kurdistan in the north and been up and running almost instantly.  Unfortunately Syria would have instantly gone into a Civil war (instead of waiting another 10 years) and the one underway in Turkey at the time would have gone from smoldering to disrupting US supply lines.  Can't have that.  Also Turkey doesn't want to let the Kurdish area of the country go - it gives ideas to other minorities.  We got support and tacit approval from those regimes to knock over Sadam, wouldn't have done to generate a Civil war in their countries in return.

Ain't world politics fun?
 
2013-08-26 03:54:34 PM

Jackson Herring: that was a bit hard to read so I sharpened it up

[800x624 from http://i.imgur.com/qoR7A2e.jpg image 800x624]


Do you have the original of that pic?
 
2013-08-26 03:55:27 PM
Who supports the Syrian Rebels?

According to the chart:

a) Qatar
b) the Saudis and the Gulf
c) Al Qaeda
d) Hamas
e) Israeli.
f) The USA
g) Lebanon Sunnis (also supported by the Saudis and the Gulf
h) Turkey

Misery acquainteth a man with strange bedfellows.--William Shakespear, The Tempest

Assad is supported by Russia and Iran for the sole purpose of keeping the US out of Central Asia's oil fields as much as possible.

In other words, practically everybody is on the same side on this except Russia and Iran.

The simple solution to cut the Gordian Knot that is the Middle East--everybody pays the Syrian rebels to invade Russia and Iran.

See y'all on the Plains of Megiddo.
 
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