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(WFAA Fort Worth)   Braving heat, murky water and snakes - including a water moccasin - 911 Wildlife workers spent the day installing the device, the "Beaver Deceiver". Oddly, this story has nothing to do with your mom's weekend plans   (wfaa.com) divider line 44
    More: Obvious, Fairview, wildlifes, dams  
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4080 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Aug 2013 at 4:33 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



44 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-08-23 04:38:16 AM
More like Receiver Beaver then

/ Boobies
 
2013-08-23 04:38:27 AM
Beavers!
 
2013-08-23 04:42:08 AM
But your Tranny dad however...

/Although I guess that might be deceiving beaver.
 
2013-08-23 04:50:44 AM
That headline makes my brain hurt, largely because of the way the lines break on the main page but also because caught sayof punctuation.
 
2013-08-23 05:00:45 AM
Genius way of securing return business!

"Oh, the Beaver Deceiver (aka a pipe) is clogged again and the pond is filling back up you say!? Well darn that pesky swamp debris..."
 
2013-08-23 05:19:29 AM
That'll work about six hours, beavers already know about ground seeps.
 
2013-08-23 05:21:24 AM
imageshack.us

♪ ♫ You can't bite my beaver ♪ ♫
 
2013-08-23 05:25:25 AM
That's an awfully big crew for just one beaver dam.
 
2013-08-23 05:27:53 AM
Maybe you shouldn't be building your million-dollar homes there.
bloggingblue.com
 
2013-08-23 05:49:18 AM
Yes, habitat destruction is much more humane than just shooting an animal...

/Just be honest about it.
 
2013-08-23 05:49:34 AM
there can't be anyone left in the world who hasnt seen the clip of the newsreader unable to stop laughing when reading a report about beaver fever. it is quite funny

if you have been under a rock on the outer hebrides do a youtube search

newsreader to weatherman: 'So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night? ' also funny
 
2013-08-23 06:18:03 AM
I can't think of a better place to build a 7-figure home than in a swamp.
 
2013-08-23 06:24:13 AM
A pipe.
 
2013-08-23 07:02:20 AM
A "beaver deceiver"? I was expecting something along the lines of a modified wooden toilet roll holder instead...
 
2013-08-23 07:17:34 AM
Whenever I tell someone how Fark has these really funny headlines, and they decide to check it out, there is always a headline like this on the main page.
 
2013-08-23 07:20:40 AM
What a beaver deceiver may look like:
funfive.net
 
2013-08-23 07:45:45 AM
900+ wildlife workers seems excessive for a job this size.
 
2013-08-23 07:48:37 AM

RobSeace: A "beaver deceiver"? I was expecting something along the lines of a modified wooden toilet roll holder instead...


Wow... Just wow.
 
2013-08-23 07:50:02 AM

Badgers: Maybe you shouldn't be building your million-dollar homes there.
[bloggingblue.com image 300x165]



Oh, of course *you'd* side with the beavers.
 
2013-08-23 07:53:58 AM
i did some beaver trapping when i was a teenager and those buggers are pretty damn smart. we didn't know really what we were doing and one idea we came up with was punching and kicking holes in the dams so the beavers would try to patch them and get trapped. i dove under the water to punch holes in the dam with a pry bar. anyway, those furry farkers came back and did patch the holes without stepping on the traps. i have to think these beavers are simply going to plug the plastic drain.

come to think of it when i was a kid we were told we could disturb a beaver dam [although we did] but i don't remember who told us this.
 
2013-08-23 07:59:56 AM
Warden, try not to be too hard on the beaver.
 
2013-08-23 08:13:48 AM
That's what we really need. For our internet speed to be based on how much juice our Congresscritter has.
 
2013-08-23 08:15:29 AM
I work for one of the most eco-friendly, granola, tree hugging park systems around.  We'd have just shot the beavers and demolished the dam.
 
2013-08-23 08:23:19 AM

prjindigo: That'll work about six hours, beavers already know about ground seeps.


www.wildlifehotline.org
A bit more than just a ground seep.
 
2013-08-23 08:23:39 AM
This reminds me of back when I had a job with Beaver Patrol.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j10TmxrhW9k
 
2013-08-23 08:27:37 AM

starlost: i did some beaver trapping when i was a teenager and those buggers are pretty damn smart. we didn't know really what we were doing and one idea we came up with was punching and kicking holes in the dams so the beavers would try to patch them and get trapped. i dove under the water to punch holes in the dam with a pry bar. anyway, those furry farkers came back and did patch the holes without stepping on the traps. i have to think these beavers are simply going to plug the plastic drain.


Of course they will. Beavers are pretty smart.

A bunch of granolas built a 5-home "mini development" with a package sewage system next to my farm, not far from the creek that runs through my place. The creek is about 3-ft across, about a foot deep in most places, and has eroded through the soil to the bedrock so the banks are around 4-ft on both sides. Perfect for a dam, and the beavers - having disappeared through overtrapping about a century ago - returned in the '90s and built a pretty spectacular dam. The water soon backed up and created a shallow lake that disrupted the package sewage system, so I offered to destroy the dam.

Nope, much weeping and wailing about the poor little beavers. They wanted me to install one of these diverters but the people who do such things know that most granolas have more money than sense, so they wanted $4k to do it. I refused to pay, and once again offered to either dynamite or tear down the dam with a backhoe.

The granolas offered to pay for the diverter, so that's what happened.

Within a day, the beavers had plugged up the diverter. They had that done before the check for the diverter cleared the bank, I bet.

I tore down the dam with a backhoe and shot the beavers as they scrambled out of the den.
 
2013-08-23 08:29:36 AM
What a "beaver deceiver" might look like

lh5.googleusercontent.com
 
2013-08-23 08:30:19 AM
I had a problem with them flooding my farm field when I was a teenager.  A rifle ended up being the best solution.  They will come back once they have a chance to breed.
 
2013-08-23 08:43:00 AM
What they need is the beaver commander, Jack.
 
2013-08-23 08:43:18 AM

BMFPitt: That's what we really need. For our internet speed to be based on how much juice our Congresscritter has.


Umm...wrong thread?

Or are you just saying there's a series of tubes at work here?
 
2013-08-23 08:57:20 AM

PunGent: Yes, habitat destruction is much more humane than just shooting an animal...

/Just be honest about it.


So there's a chance they might live happily ever after...

I'm going to predict a FAIL here. Every time somebody tries to outwit nature, they find  out they're not so smart because nature adapts in very simple ways.
 
2013-08-23 08:58:34 AM
The founding beavers, builders of great nations, no longer wanted.
 
2013-08-23 09:28:14 AM
They say that destroying a dam will only make the beavers build another down-stream.
Won't the same thing happen when you drain a pond with a deceiver?
 
2013-08-23 09:47:43 AM
What's the difference between a Clemson Leveler and a Beaver Deceiver?
 
2013-08-23 10:30:02 AM
Why don't they hire those Duck Dynasty idiot to just shoot them.
 
2013-08-23 10:52:27 AM
Does having too much money MAKE granolas stupid, or did they have a head start?
 
2013-08-23 10:53:14 AM
Can someone please make a Bieber Deceiver?
 
2013-08-23 10:54:06 AM

edmo: PunGent: Yes, habitat destruction is much more humane than just shooting an animal...

/Just be honest about it.

So there's a chance they might live happily ever after...

I'm going to predict a FAIL here. Every time somebody tries to outwit nature, they find  out they're not so smart because nature adapts in very simple ways.


No, what they did works; the company I work for manages a few sites near streams that get beaver'd every once in a while. It's more complicated than just a pipe through the damn but it's still pretty simple.

Having a guy come out and trap/shoot them every year or so is usually cheaper until you get to the 5-10 year range. Then a solution like this that rarely needs anything is the better option. I would assume that home-owners (or the HOA) would rather have this than a guy stalking beavers after they've already built a damn.
 
2013-08-23 10:55:57 AM

RobSeace: A "beaver deceiver"? I was expecting something along the lines of a modified wooden toilet roll holder instead...


MWTR?WJW
 
2013-08-23 11:05:22 AM

PunGent: Yes, habitat destruction is much more humane than just shooting an animal...

/Just be honest about it.


Maybe they can move to the Lee of the stone
 
2013-08-23 02:54:27 PM

need4mospd: Can someone please make a Bieber Deceiver?


What would that be?  Real Dolls made to look like the members of One Direction?
 
2013-08-23 02:56:50 PM

Fano: PunGent: Yes, habitat destruction is much more humane than just shooting an animal...

/Just be honest about it.

Maybe they can move to the Lee of the stone


They can't.  That sickly bastard Timmy is still stuck in bed.
 
2013-08-23 10:57:41 PM

PunGent: Umm...wrong thread?


Yeah...
 
2013-08-24 05:24:08 PM
And still, no band uses that name.
Shakes head, ambles away.
 
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