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(Mental Floss)   Come for the 25 rejected nicknames for professional sports teams. Stay for the Boston Unicorns vs. the Miami Beaches   (mentalfloss.com) divider line 99
    More: Fail, professional sports teams, Abe Pollin, stallions, NFL Football, black bears, Age of Empires, Bob McNair, nicknames  
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2773 clicks; posted to Sports » on 22 Aug 2013 at 9:34 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-08-22 09:35:49 AM
The Boston Unicorns would totally horn the Miami Beaches right in the sand castles.
 
2013-08-22 09:38:19 AM
Apollos or Stallions would have been way better than Houston Texans.
 
2013-08-22 09:45:03 AM
I think Stallions, Lumberjacks, and Beaches are better than what they chose.
 
2013-08-22 09:51:49 AM
Toronto Dragons would have been great.I also wish there were more teams named after Griffons, Gorillas, and stinging bugs.
 
2013-08-22 09:58:37 AM

Gunny Highway: Toronto Dragons would have been great.I also wish there were more teams named after Griffons, Gorillas, and stinging bugs.


For most teams, I would agree but dinosaurs kick so much ass.
 
2013-08-22 10:06:04 AM
Hrm...good list, but they missed the Baltimore Ravens story. The expansion team was going to be called the Rhinos. Folks didn't cotton to that, so there was a contest in the Baltimore Sun, and Ravens won since we got Poe buried in our town so why not? Then Art Modell moved the Browns over and told reporters he was thinking about renaming the team either the Bombers or Americans. After someone kicked that stupid arse around for a while, he decided oh, the city already decided on Ravens, so that's what he went with.
 
2013-08-22 10:09:46 AM
Back in college, when the Houston Oilers moved to Tennessee, they had a 'Name the New Team' contest. I submitted The Nashville Honkies, and their helmet logo was going to be Elvis style mutton chops... Needless to say, I did not win.
 
2013-08-22 10:15:00 AM

Ponzholio: Back in college, when the Houston Oilers moved to Tennessee, they had a 'Name the New Team' contest. I submitted The Nashville Honkies, and their helmet logo was going to be Elvis style mutton chops... Needless to say, I did not win.


Bet your money on The Bribes, they always win.
 
2013-08-22 10:27:25 AM
Sharks was chosen from 2,300 entries in San Jose's name-the-team contest. The other finalists included Rubber Puckies, Screaming Squids, Salty Dogs, and Blades. Blades was the most popular entry, but ultimately rejected because of its gang implications.

Approves:
hiscrivener.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-08-22 10:28:03 AM

Gunny Highway: Toronto Dragons would have been great.I also wish there were more teams named after Griffons, Gorillas, and stinging bugs.


As weird as it LOOKS I would love for Toronto to have a team called the "Saurus Rexes"
Say it out loud:
Toronto Saurus Rexes.

Kinda works.  Anyone still reading? Here's one a little better. (not tough to do, I know) If Delaware ever gets an NFL team they should be the "Wolves" so they'd be the Delaware wolves.  And they'd go overseas and play in London a lot.  The Delaware Wolves of London.
 
2013-08-22 10:32:28 AM

SharkaPult: Gunny Highway: Toronto Dragons would have been great.I also wish there were more teams named after Griffons, Gorillas, and stinging bugs.

As weird as it LOOKS I would love for Toronto to have a team called the "Saurus Rexes"
Say it out loud:
Toronto Saurus Rexes.

Kinda works.  Anyone still reading? Here's one a little better. (not tough to do, I know) If Delaware ever gets an NFL team they should be the "Wolves" so they'd be the Delaware wolves.  And they'd go overseas and play in London a lot.  The Delaware Wolves of London.


Michael Bolton: That's the worst idea I've ever heard in my life, Tom.

Samir: Yes, this is horrible, this idea.
 
2013-08-22 10:35:12 AM
As a resident of the Greater Toronto Area, I would have preferred Dragons.  When "Raptors" got chosen, I wondered why we'd allow ourselves to name our team after a "character" from a movie no one will remember in 10 years.
 
2013-08-22 10:39:11 AM
There are a lot of people who call Miami "Beaches" but they don't spell it that way
 
2013-08-22 10:39:26 AM

Mercutio74: As a resident of the Greater Toronto Area, I would have preferred Dragons.  When "Raptors" got chosen, I wondered why we'd allow ourselves to name our team after a "character" from a movie no one will remember in 10 years.


Yet everyone does still remember it...
 
2013-08-22 10:53:35 AM

IAmRight: Mercutio74: As a resident of the Greater Toronto Area, I would have preferred Dragons.  When "Raptors" got chosen, I wondered why we'd allow ourselves to name our team after a "character" from a movie no one will remember in 10 years.

Yet everyone does still remember it...


The name also remains appropriate as the team is as terrible as the movie was.
 
2013-08-22 10:53:46 AM
img.fark.net

denver unicorns seems more appropriate.
 
2013-08-22 10:55:09 AM
The New Orleans Pelicans is a silly name, even if the bird is a big deal in N.O.
 
2013-08-22 10:59:34 AM
Miami Flamingos would be consistent with their 2013 uniforms and stadium.
 
2013-08-22 11:03:03 AM
Seattle Lumberjacks

This one would have been okay.
 
2013-08-22 11:06:07 AM
i kinda recall a contest to name the D-Backs but i'm sure it was just  a PR campaign, as i'm sure Jerry Colangelo had already focused grouped the name and the color scheme.  Scorpions?  Bighorns?  Sun Rays?  i kinda recall shiat like that.
 
2013-08-22 11:08:08 AM

Mercutio74: As a resident of the Greater Toronto Area, I would have preferred Dragons.  When "Raptors" got chosen, I wondered why we'd allow ourselves to name our team after a "character" from a movie no one will remember in 10 years.


It was a mistake.

Possible Toronto names: Blueshirts, Igopogo, (Lake) Monsters, Wendigo,

I dunno.
 
2013-08-22 11:08:47 AM
 
2013-08-22 11:09:36 AM

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: Seattle Lumberjacks

This one would have been okay.


The Jack.  I like it and it would work well for a shiatty team too.

skinink: The New Orleans Pelicans is a silly name, even if the bird is a big deal in N.O.


I like it a lot.  It seems to divide people.
 
2013-08-22 11:12:08 AM
Is pheonix plural. Can there even be more than one Phoenix?
 
2013-08-22 11:15:49 AM

skinink: The New Orleans Pelicans is a silly name, even if the bird is a big deal in N.O.


Would they win?

N.O.Pe.
 
2013-08-22 11:16:15 AM
Every proposed alternative to "Wild" was superior
 
2013-08-22 11:19:25 AM

Lost Thought 00: Every proposed alternative to "Wild" was superior


I  dont hate nicknames that dont end with "S" but Wild is really bad.
 
das
2013-08-22 11:21:28 AM

thecpt: Is pheonix plural. Can there even be more than one Phoenix?


I am THE Pheonix. I rise in flames.
 
2013-08-22 11:22:48 AM

SlothB77: [img.fark.net image 309x209]

denver unicorns seems more appropriate.


That could be a great way to pick new team names.  A song, a montage, and then a race through a monster infested pit.  The surviving animal is your new mascot.
 
2013-08-22 11:24:21 AM
How about the Toronto Shield

members.shaw.ca

/throwing shiat at the wall here
 
2013-08-22 11:33:02 AM

Gunny Highway: How about the Toronto Shield



/throwing shiat at the wall here


Do you know where Toronto is on that map?

Tip: not the Canadian Shield
 
2013-08-22 11:36:27 AM
Toronto Seven (7th Toronto Regiment, RCA)
Toronto Dragoons (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Royal_Canadian_Dragoons Probably where the Dragon nickname came from and makes me think that Dragon was the way to go)
Toronto Deer-Jumping Fairies
Toronto Goons
Toronto Retarded Coyote Driver

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Regimental_nicknames_of_the_Canadian_Fo rc es

Okay, maybe some of those wouldnt work.
 
2013-08-22 11:38:55 AM
i.imgur.com

Damn Canadian gangbangers..
 
2013-08-22 11:41:18 AM

dywed88: Gunny Highway: How about the Toronto Shield

/throwing shiat at the wall here

Do you know where Toronto is on that map?

Tip: not the Canadian Shield


It is close, provides protection to the North(?), and sounds cool.  They went with farking Raptors, okay.
 
2013-08-22 11:45:08 AM

Gunny Highway: Mercutio74: As a resident of the Greater Toronto Area, I would have preferred Dragons.  When "Raptors" got chosen, I wondered why we'd allow ourselves to name our team after a "character" from a movie no one will remember in 10 years.

It was a mistake.

Possible Toronto names: Blueshirts, Igopogo, (Lake) Monsters, Wendigo,

I dunno.


Look for the Toronto Raptors to be re-named Toronto Huskies (history sucks, biatches)

In the mean time, what a current raptor may look like...
imageshack.com
(osprey)
 
2013-08-22 11:45:11 AM

das: thecpt: Is pheonix plural. Can there even be more than one Phoenix?

I am THE Pheonix. I rise in flames.


Is that from something, or is that on their degrees?
 
2013-08-22 11:46:29 AM
They forgot the Yankees unofficial nickname; starts with an "F" and rhymes with "hags".
 
2013-08-22 11:47:13 AM

Resolute: IAmRight: Mercutio74: As a resident of the Greater Toronto Area, I would have preferred Dragons.  When "Raptors" got chosen, I wondered why we'd allow ourselves to name our team after a "character" from a movie no one will remember in 10 years.

Yet everyone does still remember it...

The name also remains appropriate as the team is as terrible as the movie was.


Come now, let's not be hasty. I believe it is more accurate to say they are as terrible as the movie's sequels are.

As for the name, raptors have remained a very well known dinosaurs after the film, right up there with t-rex and triceratops.

That said, I think the name is a bit silly (though I would love to see the Edmonton Albertasauruses). Surely you could find something more Toronto, Ontario, or Canada connected than "raptors" or "dragons". But you could also say that for the Jays, sure blue jays live in southern Ontario, but they aren't particularly connected to the region.

The Argonauts have the excuse of being a 19th century rowing club that decided to field a football team (also the origin of blue as the colour of Toronto sports teams).
 
2013-08-22 11:49:15 AM

sno man: Gunny Highway: Mercutio74: As a resident of the Greater Toronto Area, I would have preferred Dragons.  When "Raptors" got chosen, I wondered why we'd allow ourselves to name our team after a "character" from a movie no one will remember in 10 years.

It was a mistake.

Possible Toronto names: Blueshirts, Igopogo, (Lake) Monsters, Wendigo,

I dunno.

Look for the Toronto Raptors to be re-named Toronto Huskies (history sucks, biatches)

In the mean time, what a current raptor may look like...
[imageshack.com image 600x400]
(osprey)


They should be re-named the Toronto Not-Very-Good-At-Basketballs or the Toronto Failed-EuroPlayer-Experiments or the Toronto Mathematically-Eliminated-Before-The-Allstar-Games
 
2013-08-22 11:52:32 AM

dywed88: "dragons"


Looks like Dragon was the nickname of an Onterio based military unit.
 
2013-08-22 11:55:00 AM
I saw a documentary about DC in the 70's and right about the time the first pandas were sent here from China the area was panda crazy. So when the Capitals were formed in 1974 they kicked around the idea to name them the pandas.

I also still have a few of the forms for the Wizards change somewhere. IIRC you got a form when you ordered a pizza from Dominos. I still remember Don & Mike pulling for everyone to vote for Seadogs since all the names were lame.
 
2013-08-22 11:55:50 AM

dallylamma: They should be re-named the Toronto Not-Very-Good-At-Basketballs or the Toronto Failed-EuroPlayer-Experiments or the Toronto Mathematically-Eliminated-Before-The-Allstar-Games


heh
How about the Toronto Beaches... they just lie there and stink.

To be fair, I think Leiweke will bring the team around, but damn are they starting from a deep hole.
 
2013-08-22 12:00:47 PM
What would you rename the Redskins if they decided go PC?
 
2013-08-22 12:02:51 PM

Devo: What would you rename the Redskins if they decided go PC?


Is Warriors offensive?
 
2013-08-22 12:08:50 PM

thecpt: Is pheonix plural. Can there even be more than one Phoenix?


We can always talk about hypothetical Phoenices (I think this would be the plural).  Maybe in parallel universes?
 
2013-08-22 12:09:26 PM
You know, as opposed to the real-life Phoenix.
 
2013-08-22 12:11:13 PM
Blades was the most popular entry, but ultimately rejected because of its gang implications. Sharks won out for being both fierce and local...

So in other words, none of them had seen West Side Story?
 
2013-08-22 12:12:29 PM
Gunny Highway: Is Warriors offensive?

Can you dig it?
 
2013-08-22 12:15:50 PM
In 1995, the expansion franchise's ownership group asked fans to vote from among a list of nicknames that included Coyotes, Diamondbacks, Phoenix, Rattlers, and Scorpions.

And they were just gonna hand a big fark you to the Rattlers, who had been there for 3 years at that point, and the Coyotes, who were in the process of being sold and moving to Phx?
 
2013-08-22 12:16:41 PM

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: Seattle Lumberjacks

This one would have been okay.


They do sleep all night and work all day
 
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