If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Business Insider)   Goldman'shiatrader lost $100,000,000 yesterday. What do you say we chip to make them whole again?   (businessinsider.com) divider line 59
    More: Amusing  
•       •       •

2893 clicks; posted to Business » on 21 Aug 2013 at 5:43 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



59 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-08-21 04:28:05 PM  
Filter win?
Filter win.
 
2013-08-21 04:34:29 PM  
+1 but only if you leave the filterfark.
 
2013-08-21 04:41:47 PM  

urger: Filter win?
Filter win.


THIS

PainInTheASP: +1 but only if you leave the filterfark.


And THAT.
 
2013-08-21 04:48:31 PM  
Masters of the Universe!
 
2013-08-21 04:58:36 PM  
I'd chip in, but the supply of the world's smallest violins are shockingly low in goldman-sach's case.
 
2013-08-21 05:08:49 PM  
Was it lost in manure futures?
 
2013-08-21 05:17:24 PM  
Awesome
 
2013-08-21 05:26:53 PM  
I wonder if we could use the "Tattle" links below to beg the modmins to please, please, PLEEEEASE green this one...
 
2013-08-21 05:40:16 PM  
A Goldman spokesman confirmed the error to Bloomberg news, saying that any losses "would not be material."

I like how $100 million is treated as a trivial loss.
 
2013-08-21 05:45:25 PM  
Your highly automated trading system designed to manipulate the market and screw over anyone not big enough to play the game malfunctioned and you lost a ton of money? I'm so sorry to hear that.
 
2013-08-21 05:46:02 PM  
Was it in aluminum?
 
2013-08-21 05:46:21 PM  
th07.deviantart.net
 
2013-08-21 05:51:31 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: urger: Filter win?
Filter win.

THIS

PainInTheASP: +1 but only if you leave the filterfark.

And THAT.

 
2013-08-21 05:57:48 PM  
I read it as "Goldman's shiat raider".

Yeah accurate.
 
2013-08-21 06:02:56 PM  

robbiex0r: Your highly automated trading system designed to manipulate the market and screw over anyone not big enough to play the game malfunctioned and you lost a ton of money? I'm so sorry to hear that.


They're being reviewed.

When you're that big, you get to call a do over.
 
2013-08-21 06:09:55 PM  
FTFA: A Goldman spokesman confirmed the error to Bloomberg news, saying that any losses "would not be material."

Oh, how soon we forget..."private profit and public risk".

linuxmafia.com
 
2013-08-21 06:13:21 PM  
Sell! Mortimer, sell!
 
2013-08-21 06:14:30 PM  
Farkback: This headline has a typographical error.  Specifically, it's missing the word 'in' between 'chip' and 'to'.  Unless <b>Subby</b> is suggesting a golf fundraiser.
 
2013-08-21 06:15:14 PM  
Stupid editor fail.
 
2013-08-21 06:23:36 PM  
I'm having a hard time figuring out what the pre-filtered headline was.

"Goldman's [space] hi [space] trader"?

"Goldman's [space] hit [space] trader"?

Something else?

None of that makes any sense to me.  Anybody know what Subby was going for here?
 
2013-08-21 06:31:56 PM  

Cyberluddite: I'm having a hard time figuring out what the pre-filtered headline was.

"Goldman's [space] hi [space] trader"?

"Goldman's [space] hit [space] trader"?

Something else?

None of that makes any sense to me.  Anybody know what Subby was going for here?


The second.  A hit trader, like a hit record, makes a lot of money.  Except in this case, apparently.
 
2013-08-21 06:33:34 PM  
Goldman'shiat trader

That break the same way?
 
2013-08-21 06:33:51 PM  
It's ok, the government will compensate them for their loss with your tax dollars
 
2013-08-21 06:36:23 PM  

impaler: robbiex0r: Your highly automated trading system designed to manipulate the market and screw over anyone not big enough to play the game malfunctioned and you lost a ton of money? I'm so sorry to hear that.

They're being reviewed.

When you're that big, you get to call a do over.


Maybe I should call them about that accidental Facebook purchase.


/I didn't really do that
 
2013-08-21 07:00:35 PM  
The TF hipster presence is strong here.
 
2013-08-21 07:15:02 PM  
Well, they ought to have a shiatrader. They're in a world of shiat.
 
2013-08-21 07:17:31 PM  

Can't_Think_Of_A_Name: Cyberluddite: I'm having a hard time figuring out what the pre-filtered headline was.

"Goldman's [space] hi [space] trader"?

"Goldman's [space] hit [space] trader"?

Something else?

None of that makes any sense to me.  Anybody know what Subby was going for here?

The second.  A hit trader, like a hit record, makes a lot of money.  Except in this case, apparently.


It's the first, otherwise you'd have a double "t".

Subby obviously intended this.
 
2013-08-21 07:22:14 PM  
NO more bail outs , no more redos , if you fark up its on you  so man up, grab them bootstraps and man up.
 
2013-08-21 07:32:00 PM  

grimlock1972: NO more bail outs , no more redos , if you fark up its on you  so man up, grab them bootstraps and man up.


Unfortunately, they're so large, that a sudden bankruptcy would fark over the economy. Really, we need to eliminate "too big to fail" - but in the '90s conservatives spent all their time whining about how Microsoft wasn't even close to a monopoly (even though they had a larger market share than Standard Oil did when monopoly laws were first enacted). Now all of a sudden, they pretend like it was the obvious thing to do all along.
 
2013-08-21 07:33:02 PM  
Hey I trade shiat, let me do it.
 
2013-08-21 07:47:08 PM  
I'm sure that whoever coded the profanity filter for Fark could fix that filtering in a few minutes.

God damn, I hope they never do.
 
2013-08-21 08:19:10 PM  

vygramul: grimlock1972: NO more bail outs , no more redos , if you fark up its on you  so man up, grab them bootstraps and man up.

Unfortunately, they're so large, that a sudden bankruptcy would fark over the economy. Really, we need to eliminate "too big to fail" - but in the '90s conservatives spent all their time whining about how Microsoft wasn't even close to a monopoly (even though they had a larger market share than Standard Oil did when monopoly laws were first enacted). Now all of a sudden, they pretend like it was the obvious thing to do all along.


If they do it again, nationalize them and be done with it. Wind down their assets, pay off some national debt, dissolve the company, viola.
 
2013-08-21 08:23:16 PM  

jake_lex: I'm sure that whoever coded the profanity filter for Fark could fix that filtering in a few minutes.

God damn, I hope they never do.


Agreed. There are times when both the shiat and the boobies/weeners filterpwn is just too awesome to fix.
 
2013-08-21 08:26:32 PM  

Lost Thought 00: It's ok, the government will compensate them for their loss with your tax dollars


Well, if taxpayers make as much of a profit as we did the last time (when they didnt want the money in the first place) let's go for it! The profit we made on Goldman alone offset the money we pissed away on Chrysler.
 
2013-08-21 08:31:54 PM  
Thats like pin money to those guys.
 
2013-08-21 08:57:51 PM  

robbiex0r: Your highly automated trading system designed to manipulate the market and screw over anyone not big enough to play the game malfunctioned and you lost a ton of money? I'm so sorry to hear that.


You don't have to be sorry, they'll get out of it.  I'm not very bright are working with and threatening synonyms?

"The bank told Bloomberg it is now "working with exchanges" to resolve faulty options trades from this morning."
 
2013-08-21 09:02:03 PM  
Shiat trader indeed.
 
2013-08-21 09:11:47 PM  
Just for reference, that is less than 5 days net profits from last quarter.
 
2013-08-21 09:12:18 PM  
I like a good schadenfreude party as much as the next guy, but Lloyd Blankfein wipes his ass with 100 mill.  It is tantamount to one of us losing a couple of bucks in the couch cushion.
 
2013-08-21 09:15:57 PM  
I'm not convinced that they'll be able to corner the market on shiat.
 
2013-08-21 09:32:00 PM  

Pumpernickel bread: I like a good schadenfreude party as much as the next guy, but Lloyd Blankfein wipes his ass with 100 mill.  It is tantamount to one of us losing a couple of bucks in the couch cushion.


Not quite, $100M is a non-trivial sum to any company. In this case, though, even if they were to lose it it'd just be the cost of doing business.

GS had $34B in revenue last year, so $100M represents about 1/340 of that. This is the equivalent of about $200 to a middle class income.
 
2013-08-21 10:00:17 PM  
img59.imageshack.us

TURN THOSE MACHINES BACK ON!
 
2013-08-21 10:21:47 PM  

Can't_Think_Of_A_Name: Cyberluddite: I'm having a hard time figuring out what the pre-filtered headline was.

"Goldman's [space] hi [space] trader"?

"Goldman's [space] hit [space] trader"?

Something else?

None of that makes any sense to me.  Anybody know what Subby was going for here?

The second.  A hit trader, like a hit record, makes a lot of money.  Except in this case, apparently.


There is no such phrase as "hit trader".
There is however, a futures market for fertilizer swaps.

Study it out.
 
2013-08-21 11:01:34 PM  
"Goldman'shiatrader lost $100,000,000 yesterday. What do you say we chip to make them whole again?"

Will we have any other choice?
 
2013-08-21 11:43:45 PM  

Peki: jake_lex: I'm sure that whoever coded the profanity filter for Fark could fix that filtering in a few minutes.

God damn, I hope they never do.

Agreed. There are times when both the shiat and the boobies/weeners filterpwn is just too awesome to fix.


I always get a chuckle when someone tries to type shiate (as in Muslim), forgets the extra "i" and gets filter-pwned. It's especially hilarious because when you're talking about shiates it's typical a serious conversation the politics tab. Happens at least every few days and lightens the mood.

/embarrassed veteran of all the filters
 
2013-08-21 11:47:18 PM  
Are you farking kidding me? AAAAAAARGH I spelled it correctly both times and got pwned in a post about being pwnd! Gotta throw an apostrophe in there next time.

/lulz
 
2013-08-21 11:51:34 PM  

vygramul: grimlock1972: NO more bail outs , no more redos , if you fark up its on you  so man up, grab them bootstraps and man up.

Unfortunately, they're so large, that a sudden bankruptcy would fark over the economy. Really, we need to eliminate "too big to fail"


Remember that they're "too big to fail" but if they are made to account, or made to disclose, and aren't bailed out, the whole delicate world economy will collapse.

Did I get that right, Hank Paulson?
 
2013-08-21 11:52:54 PM  
d24w6bsrhbeh9d.cloudfront.net

//close enough
 
2013-08-22 02:23:06 AM  
Well as long as they're being reviewed. Thank god we have all these safeguards in place to stop any shady dealings.
 
2013-08-22 04:11:57 AM  

dickfreckle: AAAAAAARGH

shiite/not gettin' it
 
Displayed 50 of 59 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report