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(WLWT)   Man struck by lightning on Creation Museum zip line. Where is your God now?   (wlwt.com ) divider line
    More: Interesting, Creation Museum, zip line, lightning, museums  
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4104 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Aug 2013 at 5:22 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



67 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-08-21 04:09:03 PM  
Working in mysterious ways?
 
2013-08-21 04:14:37 PM  
...and God said, "Dammit, missed again"
 
2013-08-21 04:17:27 PM  

Amos Quito: Working in mysterious ways?


When god saves you from the tornado, it's divine intervention; when he trashes your house and everything you love, it's mysterious ways. Is it rational? No. But neither is believing in a merciful but vengeful and spiteful sky friend.
 
2013-08-21 04:21:15 PM  

ecmoRandomNumbers: Amos Quito: Working in mysterious ways?

When god saves you from the tornado, it's divine intervention; when he trashes your house and everything you love, it's mysterious ways. Is it rational? No. But neither is believing in a merciful but vengeful and spiteful sky friend.


Well... I don't want to start any blasphemous rumors.. but..
 
2013-08-21 04:25:06 PM  
You see the zip line represents evolution and was therefore blasphemous.
 
2013-08-21 04:33:34 PM  
The zip line attraction opened this spring to help the religion-themed museum attract a wider audience.

LOL. Pretty soon they're going to be putting evolution exhibits just to drum up controversy.
 
2013-08-21 04:39:53 PM  
Zip line.  Zap line.  It's an easy mistake.
 
2013-08-21 04:57:15 PM  

Shadow Blasko: ecmoRandomNumbers: Amos Quito: Working in mysterious ways?

When god saves you from the tornado, it's divine intervention; when he trashes your house and everything you love, it's mysterious ways. Is it rational? No. But neither is believing in a merciful but vengeful and spiteful sky friend.

Well... I don't want to start any blasphemous rumors.. but..


that asshole has a sick sense of humor
 
2013-08-21 05:10:54 PM  
"If creationism isn't the holy truth may God strike me down..."
 
2013-08-21 05:19:58 PM  
This proves the existence of Zeus.

fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net

Now, if he had been struck by a bolt of foreskins....
 
2013-08-21 05:24:55 PM  
Just popped over from the Satan thread. This God guy sounds like an asshole.
 
2013-08-21 05:26:22 PM  

Lionel Mandrake: This proves the existence of Zeus.

[fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net image 320x240]

Now, if he had been struck by a bolt of foreskins....


According to wikipedia a bolt is like 40 to 100 yards long...that's a lot of foreskins!
 
2013-08-21 05:27:13 PM  
Praise Thor!
 
2013-08-21 05:27:41 PM  

BumpInTheNight: Lionel Mandrake: This proves the existence of Zeus.

[fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net image 320x240]

Now, if he had been struck by a bolt of foreskins....

According to wikipedia a bolt is like 40 to 100 yards long...that's a lot of foreskins!


If you rub it beforehand, it doesn't take nearly as much.
 
2013-08-21 05:28:27 PM  
Obviously the guy was a gay, why else would the almighty strike at such a pure place?
 
2013-08-21 05:29:10 PM  



img501.imageshack.us

i185.photobucket.com

img408.imageshack.us

img8.imageshack.us

img34.imageshack.us

 
2013-08-21 05:30:09 PM  
Again?

encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com
 
2013-08-21 05:31:38 PM  
Slagnasty: Obviously the guy was a gay, had a gay thought why else would the almighty strike at such a pure place?

FTFY

/Remember fundies believe being gay is a choice.
 
2013-08-21 05:32:51 PM  

johnnieconnie: ...and God said, "Dammit, missed again"


He should really get some bifocals.
 
2013-08-21 05:41:36 PM  
Really Farkers? No Praise Land posts? I am disappoint-a-lee-dood-a-lee
s3.sidereel.com
 
2013-08-21 05:41:52 PM  
He blasts a creationist and you still won't give him props. Tough crowd.
 
2013-08-21 05:46:06 PM  
I meant Control-S (SMITE MIGHTILY) and used Alt-S (SMITE LIGHTLY) by excuse. And then there's that stupid Win key right between 'em. I use UNIX for kid's sake. When Bill gates gets up here, I'm gonna Nerd him up big time. A God Wedgie, biatches. And that's just for starters. Ever get a swirley with your head stuck in an F-5 tornado?

Why can't they bury someone with a Sun keyboard?
 
2013-08-21 05:46:13 PM  
www.troll.me
 
2013-08-21 05:49:00 PM  
Guess who's getting a call from their insurance agent real soon .  Guess who's not going to have a zipline real soon.
 
2013-08-21 05:49:33 PM  
The guy was obviously a sinner and deserved it.
 
2013-08-21 05:51:31 PM  

johnnieconnie: ...and God said, "Dammit, missed again"


I'm gobsmacked that I can't find a copy of that Gary Larson (?) 'tune. Oh well, there's always this one...

pbs.twimg.com
 
2013-08-21 06:02:50 PM  
Hmm, looks like we're pretty close to that point. Now I have a sad.
 
2013-08-21 06:04:54 PM  

ecmoRandomNumbers: Amos Quito: Working in mysterious ways?

When god saves you from the tornado, it's divine intervention; when he trashes your house and everything you love, it's mysterious ways. Is it rational? No. But neither is believing in a merciful but vengeful and spiteful sky friend.


It's a test of faith. Read the book of Job. It explains all you need to know about God.
 
2013-08-21 06:13:39 PM  

big pig peaches: ecmoRandomNumbers: Amos Quito: Working in mysterious ways?

When god saves you from the tornado, it's divine intervention; when he trashes your house and everything you love, it's mysterious ways. Is it rational? No. But neither is believing in a merciful but vengeful and spiteful sky friend.

It's a test of faith. Read the book of Job. It explains all you need to know about God.


He's a dick?
 
2013-08-21 06:15:27 PM  

Lionel Mandrake: big pig peaches: ecmoRandomNumbers: Amos Quito: Working in mysterious ways?

When god saves you from the tornado, it's divine intervention; when he trashes your house and everything you love, it's mysterious ways. Is it rational? No. But neither is believing in a merciful but vengeful and spiteful sky friend.

It's a test of faith. Read the book of Job. It explains all you need to know about God.

He's a dick?


Ding ding ding.
 
2013-08-21 06:22:55 PM  

Lionel Mandrake: big pig peaches: ecmoRandomNumbers: Amos Quito: Working in mysterious ways?

When god saves you from the tornado, it's divine intervention; when he trashes your house and everything you love, it's mysterious ways. Is it rational? No. But neither is believing in a merciful but vengeful and spiteful sky friend.

It's a test of faith. Read the book of Job. It explains all you need to know about God.

He's a dick?


He also likes taking bets with Satan.
 
2013-08-21 06:24:20 PM  

BumpInTheNight: Lionel Mandrake: This proves the existence of Zeus.

[fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net image 320x240]

Now, if he had been struck by a bolt of foreskins....

According to wikipedia a bolt is like 40 to 100 yards long...that's a lot of foreskins!


Meh.
Maybe to you...
 
2013-08-21 06:30:01 PM  

Tom_Slick: You see the zip line represents evolution and was therefore blasphemous.


no seriously... just what the hell does a zip-line have to do with 'biblical truth' and creationism?

/ is it their version of the 'jump to conclusions' mat?
 
2013-08-21 06:30:57 PM  
i42.tinypic.com
i41.tinypic.com
 
2013-08-21 06:40:21 PM  
Lightning was always a big problem to churches.

Before Darwin discovered electricity ....... when thunderstorms brewed, churches rang their bells to tell God that it was His Holy Place. But God (the all-knowing) didn't notice, and he sent his thunderbolts which hit the steeple, raced down the wet bell-ropes, and electrocuted the bell-ringers.

Then scienticians suggested lightning rods conducted the electric current safely to ground. Traditionalists resisted, but eventually got sick of having to rebuild.

First contest: Science 1, Religion 0
 
2013-08-21 06:53:39 PM  
i877.photobucket.com
 
2013-08-21 06:59:32 PM  

scottydoesntknow: The zip line attraction opened this spring to help the religion-themed museum attract a wider audience.

LOL. Pretty soon they're going to be putting evolution exhibits just to drum up controversy.


I was just there with my dad a few weeks ago. They actually get around the "animals fitting on the ark" problem by explaining that Noah only had to bring two of each "kind" of animal, and one of the examples given is that Noah only had to bring one pair of wolves. Wolves, dogs, coyotes, foxes (yeah, foxes), jackals, etc. are all the same "kind", and after the flood subsided, the wolves reproduced and their offspring dogs, coyotes, foxes, jackals, etc. over time.

I almost blew up in the museum. THAT'S EVOLUTION, YOU DUMBASSES! (Except the foxes, who were just kinda thrown in there like they belonged when they don't really.)
 
2013-08-21 07:04:03 PM  
God told me he hates creationists.

Which is why he made them all fat and stupid.
 
2013-08-21 07:04:06 PM  

big pig peaches: ecmoRandomNumbers: Amos Quito: Working in mysterious ways?

When god saves you from the tornado, it's divine intervention; when he trashes your house and everything you love, it's mysterious ways. Is it rational? No. But neither is believing in a merciful but vengeful and spiteful sky friend.

It's a test of faith. Read the book of Job. It explains all you need to know about God.


So when you're dead, does that mean you flunked the test or aced it?
 
2013-08-21 07:09:56 PM  
This doesn't disprove the existence of God, it could just mean he has a really great sense of humor.
 
2013-08-21 07:12:46 PM  

Chinchillazilla: I almost blew up in the museum. THAT'S EVOLUTION, YOU DUMBASSES! (Except the foxes, who were just kinda thrown in there like they belonged when they don't really.)


OK - think about this.  You're in the goddamned Christian Anti-Science Museum-Like Installation, and the one thing that sets you off is whether foxes "belong" with the other Canidae?  (Hint:  They're all Canidae, what do you think?)

Wow.  Just... wow.
 
2013-08-21 07:13:28 PM  

PhilGed: This doesn't disprove the existence of God, it could just mean he has a really great sense of humor.


Or he could just be a real prick.
 
2013-08-21 07:20:03 PM  
Jehova saves local man from Jupiter attack.
 
2013-08-21 07:23:43 PM  

Zeno-25: Lionel Mandrake: big pig peaches: ecmoRandomNumbers: Amos Quito: Working in mysterious ways?
When god saves you from the tornado, it's divine intervention; when he trashes your house and everything you love, it's mysterious ways. Is it rational? No. But neither is believing in a merciful but vengeful and spiteful sky friend.
It's a test of faith. Read the book of Job. It explains all you need to know about God.
He's a dick?
He also likes taking bets with Satan.

I thought that gambling was considered evil by most fundamentalists.  If so, then God is a sinner and therefore indistinguishable from Satan.

MrEricSir: big pig peaches: ecmoRandomNumbers: Amos Quito: Working in mysterious ways?
When god saves you from the tornado, it's divine intervention; when he trashes your house and everything you love, it's mysterious ways. Is it rational? No. But neither is believing in a merciful but vengeful and spiteful sky friend.
It's a test of faith. Read the book of Job. It explains all you need to know about God.
So when you're dead, does that mean you flunked the test or aced it?

Depends.  If you die as a martyr for the Christian belief, fully believing in God, then you aced the test.  If you die, and you don't believe, you fail and will burn in Hell.
But then again, Jesus said something along the lines that you shouldn't put God to the test when Satan told him that if you really are the Son of God, you can jump off the top of the Temple and not die.  So that would imply that dying for the cause to prove your faith in God is wrong.
So my previous answer might be wrong.  Or right.  Or I should stop interpreting the Bible literally.  Or something like that.
 
2013-08-21 07:23:50 PM  
SCIENCE!
 
2013-08-21 07:25:57 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Chinchillazilla: I almost blew up in the museum. THAT'S EVOLUTION, YOU DUMBASSES! (Except the foxes, who were just kinda thrown in there like they belonged when they don't really.)

OK - think about this.  You're in the goddamned Christian Anti-Science Museum-Like Installation, and the one thing that sets you off is whether foxes "belong" with the other Canidae?  (Hint:  They're all Canidae, what do you think?)

Wow.  Just... wow.


My point is you're not going to get a fox from a wolf. And definitely not within a couple thousand years. Too distant.

And that's not what "set me off", it was the whole concept of them embracing evolution under a different name while decrying evolution. At least be internally consistent.
 
2013-08-21 07:28:12 PM  

Chinchillazilla: And that's not what "set me off", it was the whole concept of them embracing evolution under a different name while decrying evolution. At least be internally consistent.

They're very consistent at not making any logical sense.
 
2013-08-21 07:31:17 PM  
See, this IS a miracle, if you're a religious type. The problem is, you don't get to pick & choose the miracles you get. Like in the Iliad, when Agamemnon or whoever promised Zeus the first person who greeted him as a sacrifice for a fair wind, and then his daughter came running out to meet him--well, this is like that. These fools opened their zip line to attract more people to their "Creation Museum" and almost the first thing that happens is a bolt from above striking one of the attendees? CLEARLY this is not something the gods want them to have.

So, they can obey they omen and shut it down; or ignore the miracle till they get one that is more in line with the kind they think "their" god would send them. But to me, the gods have spoken. They're not supposed to have one of these things.
 
2013-08-21 07:54:20 PM  
 
2013-08-21 07:59:35 PM  

i544.photobucket.com


Understands completely.

 
2013-08-21 08:01:27 PM  

MrEricSir: It's a test of faith. Read the book of Job. It explains all you need to know about God.

So when you're dead, does that mean you flunked the test or aced it?


Pass or fail, good person or bad person stuff still happens to people and whether you believe in God or not we all still got to deal with what we have.

Gyrfalcon: So, they can obey they omen and shut it down; or ignore the miracle till they get one that is more in line with the kind they think "their" god would send them. But to me, the gods have spoken. They're not supposed to have one of these things.


They did shut it down, only sometimes you get a staffer who leans against something without remembering why you had to shut it down.

We had this happen at the end of July when we were camping with a bunch of folks from Church.  My son and I were 30 feet in the air with a light rain making our way through a rope and steel cable obstacle course supported by telephone poles when thunder was heard in the distance.  It had to be shut down, so we made our way down by help from the staff.  I can't spell the word but it sounds like 'felleting' but they use a pulley, rope and your descent is control by a guy on the ground harnessed to the other end of the rope.  Anyway we got down and got away from the structure without anyone injured.  I didn't consider it a big deal, but then again no one hung around touching it.  My two sons and I have done it a few times, but we never considered it a test of faith to make it through a fun summer activity.
 
2013-08-21 08:03:37 PM  
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-08-21 08:31:32 PM  
Did anyone else ask "why does the Creation Museum have a zip line?"

Seriously, how does that communicate whatever bizarre message they're pushing? Do guests strap on fake wings and take a "Tour of the Angels" or something? I mean, it has to fit into their idiom somehow, right? Otherwise, they're just another Christian-based theme park.
 
2013-08-21 08:42:25 PM  

FormlessOne: Did anyone else ask "why does the Creation Museum have a zip line?"

Seriously, how does that communicate whatever bizarre message they're pushing? Do guests strap on fake wings and take a "Tour of the Angels" or something? I mean, it has to fit into their idiom somehow, right? Otherwise, they're just another Christian-based theme park.


One of the side-link 'Related' articles talks about just that. Link

Basically they aren't as successful as they'd want to be. 1.9 million visitors in 6 years is not very good (Houston Museum of Natural Science gets 2 million per year). They're adding some other attractions, including some that have nothing to do with religion, to attract more people.

I guess you could say they are evolving to survive.
 
2013-08-21 08:45:43 PM  

scottydoesntknow: FormlessOne: Did anyone else ask "why does the Creation Museum have a zip line?"

Seriously, how does that communicate whatever bizarre message they're pushing? Do guests strap on fake wings and take a "Tour of the Angels" or something? I mean, it has to fit into their idiom somehow, right? Otherwise, they're just another Christian-based theme park.

One of the side-link 'Related' articles talks about just that. Link

Basically they aren't as successful as they'd want to be. 1.9 million visitors in 6 years is not very good (Houston Museum of Natural Science gets 2 million per year). They're adding some other attractions, including some that have nothing to do with religion, to attract more people.

I guess you could say they are evolving to survive.


But considering some of those attractions are injuring people...they may not be...*dons sunglasses* intelligently designed.
 
2013-08-21 08:46:22 PM  
YEAAAAHHHH!
 
2013-08-21 08:46:40 PM  

BumpInTheNight: scottydoesntknow: FormlessOne: Did anyone else ask "why does the Creation Museum have a zip line?"

Seriously, how does that communicate whatever bizarre message they're pushing? Do guests strap on fake wings and take a "Tour of the Angels" or something? I mean, it has to fit into their idiom somehow, right? Otherwise, they're just another Christian-based theme park.

One of the side-link 'Related' articles talks about just that. Link

Basically they aren't as successful as they'd want to be. 1.9 million visitors in 6 years is not very good (Houston Museum of Natural Science gets 2 million per year). They're adding some other attractions, including some that have nothing to do with religion, to attract more people.

I guess you could say they are evolving to survive.

But considering some of those attractions are injuring people...they may not be...*dons sunglasses* intelligently designed.


armchairdiplomat.com
 
2013-08-21 09:39:21 PM  

Chinchillazilla: Benevolent Misanthrope: Chinchillazilla: I almost blew up in the museum. THAT'S EVOLUTION, YOU DUMBASSES! (Except the foxes, who were just kinda thrown in there like they belonged when they don't really.)

OK - think about this.  You're in the goddamned Christian Anti-Science Museum-Like Installation, and the one thing that sets you off is whether foxes "belong" with the other Canidae?  (Hint:  They're all Canidae, what do you think?)

Wow.  Just... wow.

My point is you're not going to get a fox from a wolf. And definitely not within a couple thousand years. Too distant.

And that's not what "set me off", it was the whole concept of them embracing evolution under a different name while decrying evolution. At least be internally consistent.


Sorry, that didn't come across as good-naturedly-ribbing as I had intended.

I can't go to places like that for exactly that reason.  The absolute hypocrisy and willful f*ckwittedness is just too much for my brain to handle.
 
2013-08-21 10:04:09 PM  
Zeus does not approve of your false idolatry.

Or, he was aiming for the Torchdown Jesus Mark II about 40 miles north, and missed.
 
2013-08-21 10:16:29 PM  

bit zero: Zeus does not approve of your false idolatry.

Or, he was aiming for the Torchdown Jesus Mark II about 40 miles north, and missed.


Zeus is channeling Tim Tebow?  At least he wasn't channeling Mark Sanchez.
 
2013-08-21 11:04:28 PM  

lack of warmth: MrEricSir: It's a test of faith. Read the book of Job. It explains all you need to know about God.

So when you're dead, does that mean you flunked the test or aced it?

Pass or fail, good person or bad person stuff still happens to people and whether you believe in God or not we all still got to deal with what we have.

Gyrfalcon: So, they can obey they omen and shut it down; or ignore the miracle till they get one that is more in line with the kind they think "their" god would send them. But to me, the gods have spoken. They're not supposed to have one of these things.

They did shut it down, only sometimes you get a staffer who leans against something without remembering why you had to shut it down.

We had this happen at the end of July when we were camping with a bunch of folks from Church.  My son and I were 30 feet in the air with a light rain making our way through a rope and steel cable obstacle course supported by telephone poles when thunder was heard in the distance.  It had to be shut down, so we made our way down by help from the staff.  I can't spell the word but it sounds like 'felleting' but they use a pulley, rope and your descent is control by a guy on the ground harnessed to the other end of the rope.  Anyway we got down and got away from the structure without anyone injured.  I didn't consider it a big deal, but then again no one hung around touching it.  My two sons and I have done it a few times, but we never considered it a test of faith to make it through a fun summer activity.


I believe the word you're looking for is belaying.  Or fellating.  Depends on what kind of camp you were at.
 
2013-08-22 05:13:09 AM  
s3.amazonaws.com

Wanted for...well...not much
 
2013-08-22 07:36:17 AM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Chinchillazilla: I almost blew up in the museum. THAT'S EVOLUTION, YOU DUMBASSES! (Except the foxes, who were just kinda thrown in there like they belonged when they don't really.)

OK - think about this.  You're in the goddamned Christian Anti-Science Museum-Like Installation, and the one thing that sets you off is whether foxes "belong" with the other Canidae?  (Hint:  They're all Canidae, what do you think?)

Wow.  Just... wow.


We all have our breaking points. Some are just more....specific...than others.
 
2013-08-22 09:17:07 AM  
 
2013-08-22 10:40:34 AM  

Chinchillazilla: scottydoesntknow: The zip line attraction opened this spring to help the religion-themed museum attract a wider audience.

LOL. Pretty soon they're going to be putting evolution exhibits just to drum up controversy.

I was just there with my dad a few weeks ago. They actually get around the "animals fitting on the ark" problem by explaining that Noah only had to bring two of each "kind" of animal, and one of the examples given is that Noah only had to bring one pair of wolves. Wolves, dogs, coyotes, foxes (yeah, foxes), jackals, etc. are all the same "kind", and after the flood subsided, the wolves reproduced and their offspring dogs, coyotes, foxes, jackals, etc. over time.

I almost blew up in the museum. THAT'S EVOLUTION, YOU DUMBASSES! (Except the foxes, who were just kinda thrown in there like they belonged when they don't really.)


Here's the thought I had the other day that I would like the Christian Anti-Science Museum to answer:

If it took God two days (48 hours; 5th and 6th day) to create all of the animals of the air, sea and the beasts on the ground, then why did he go through all the trouble of having Noah round up two of everything and put them on a boat?  Couldn't he have just flood the earth and then, when the waters receded, just spend a day or two (since he wouldn't have to worry about the sea animals since they were inexplicable spared) and drop a new toy box of animals on the earth?

Seems it would have been WAY easier than to have Noah travel all the way to - say - the Australian continent to grab a couple of kangaroos, kiwis, and koalas and bring them back to his boat.

(Also, if the ark rested on a mountain in Turkey, how did those Aussie animals get back to Australia?  And how did the panda get back to China?  And what did it eat on the ark, since it requires 20-30 lbs of bamboo per day?  And what did it eat on the journey back to China?)

/ you can't really believe this crap.... can you?
 
2013-08-22 11:39:42 AM  

Harry Freakstorm: Why can't they bury someone with a Sun keyboard?


Something something compose button?
 
2013-08-22 12:01:26 PM  

StubePT: If it took God two days (48 hours; 5th and 6th day) to create all of the animals of the air, sea and the beasts on the ground, then why did he go through all the trouble of having Noah round up two of everything and put them on a boat?  Couldn't he have just flood the earth and then, when the waters receded, just spend a day or two (since he wouldn't have to worry about the sea animals since they were inexplicable spared) and drop a new toy box of animals on the earth?


well if you want to take a stroll down that path...
Let's ignore the silly arguments about what constitutes a 'day', when you've not yet created the heavens and earth and light and darkness... we can assume the biblical 'day' means something... they were very specific about those first 6 'days'...  and we can also assume all that creating happened a looooong time ago... since we've had all those things that he supposedly created for a looooong time...  what exactly has god done since doing all that creating?  soooooo, 6 days of serious creating.. .then a couple billion years of doing nothing?  sounds like pretty nice work if you can get it... work 6 days... done... retire... sit around and have little mammals worship and fight about you forever...
 
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