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(Dallas News)   Canadians to Ted Cruz: Eh, take off you hoser, we didn't want you anyway you poutine-faced son of a burnt Timbit   (dallasnews.com) divider line 65
    More: Amusing, Sen. Ted Cruz, Canadian citizenship, Canadians, Fort Worth International Airport, sons  
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1317 clicks; posted to Politics » on 21 Aug 2013 at 12:41 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



65 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-08-21 11:55:09 AM
He's all yours America, along with Nickelback, Celine Dion and Justin BIeber.

/Suckers
 
2013-08-21 12:27:57 PM

Glenford: He's all yours America, along with Nickelback, Celine Dion and Justin BIeber.

/Suckers


YOU TAKE BEIBER BACK!  Bastard!
 
2013-08-21 12:43:58 PM

Glenford: He's all yours America, along with Nickelback, Celine Dion and Justin BIeber.

/Suckers


Can you give me asylum? I like hockey, make a mean poutine, and am a socially liberal socialist with multiple college degrees. I even love snow and pine trees!
 
2013-08-21 12:44:37 PM
Texans barely know where Canada is.

Sure we do. You take I-35 north until the speed limit signs turn metric.
 
2013-08-21 12:45:46 PM
I had no idea that Canadians could curse so uniquely.  Well done.
 
2013-08-21 12:48:56 PM
He's not our buddy, guy.
 
2013-08-21 12:49:45 PM
Canada to Cruz: "Don't let the door hit you where the good lord split you, eh" Ted could not be a Canadian anyway, the Canadians are far to polite and he is not.
 
2013-08-21 12:51:15 PM
your mother was a haory marmot and your father smelt of Saskatoon berries, eh?
 
2013-08-21 12:52:08 PM
RAFAEL CRUZ, EH?
 
2013-08-21 12:53:37 PM

sdd2000: Canada to Cruz: "Don't let the door hit you where the good lord split you, eh" Ted could not be a Canadian anyway, the Canadians are far to polite and he is not.


How did this become a stereotype? Us Canadians swear pretty much constantly. Americans will be relentlessly "polite" to your face.
 
2013-08-21 12:56:59 PM
He was gonna do it sooner, but the road was closed.
 
2013-08-21 01:00:39 PM
Who's Ted Cruz?

I assume they're talking about Rafael Edward Cruz....?
 
2013-08-21 01:01:37 PM
big.assets.huffingtonpost.com
 
2013-08-21 01:01:53 PM
Subby, I have no idea what that means but it seems very negative to me.

movieactors.com
 
2013-08-21 01:02:00 PM

A Dark Evil Omen: sdd2000: Canada to Cruz: "Don't let the door hit you where the good lord split you, eh" Ted could not be a Canadian anyway, the Canadians are far to polite and he is not.

How did this become a stereotype? Us Canadians swear pretty much constantly. Americans will be relentlessly "polite" to your face.


Please, Kid I know you mean well and all but as long as we've known you, you never unnecessarily invaded another country, secretly toppled a democracy to install a friendly dictator, "liberated" a country for it's oil...etc, and you just GIVE everyone healthcare., and have you ever heard the phrase "Ugly Canadian" uttered about your tourists?  Sorry, I know you'd like everyone to thing of you as tough and nice, but you're just too damned NICE for it to stick
 
2013-08-21 01:03:02 PM
So, he's already pissed off both of our neighbors. I wonder what he'd do with the rest of the world, given a chance.
 
2013-08-21 01:04:38 PM
That's not where the 'eh' goes in that sentence.
 
2013-08-21 01:06:05 PM
And what about his Cuban citizenship due to  his father?
 
2013-08-21 01:07:57 PM

Glenford: He's all yours America, along with Nickelback, Celine Dion and Justin BIeber.


Not so fast, hoser. You take Cruz back and we'll let Capt Kirk go free unharmed.
 
2013-08-21 01:09:03 PM
Ted Cruz: The next prime minister of Canada. His running mate 'Santorum' Shall wear the sweatervest proudly and kind of gayly

/What? You thought he 'officially' was going to renounce his Canadianess? When he spectacularly loses being El Presidente, he will crawl back and get sloppy seconds.

/McCain probably never renounced being a Panamanian just in case they needed a new rebel leader to overthrow democracy.
 
2013-08-21 01:11:01 PM
Wow.  It takes a special kind of maximum power douche to piss off Canadians.
 
2013-08-21 01:14:50 PM
Even the biggest asshole there, Harper, is a nice guy compared to this turbo douche.
 
2013-08-21 01:15:25 PM
You know, all this takes is tact. Unfortunately for these people, "tact" is considered to be some kind of P.C. liberal "weakness".
 
2013-08-21 01:16:16 PM
This shows what total fail the Tea Party is.  They embrace the Birther nonsense fully, and their Chosen One actually  wasborn outside the US.  Teabaggers never cease to be a source of amusement.
 
2013-08-21 01:18:49 PM

Hiro-ACiD: He's not our buddy, guy.


He's not our guy, friend.
 
2013-08-21 01:20:03 PM
"When I was a kid, my mom told me that I could choose to claim Canadian citizenship if I wanted," he said.

Oh crap.  He's unleashed the dreaded "Momma says" defense.
 
2013-08-21 01:22:47 PM

stamped human bacon: "When I was a kid, my mom told me that I could choose to claim Canadian citizenship if I wanted," he said.

Oh crap.  He's unleashed the dreaded "Momma says" defense.


Hasn't the tea party said that is not a valid defense for Warren's heritage?
 
2013-08-21 01:25:59 PM

stamped human bacon: "When I was a kid, my mom told me that I could choose to claim Canadian citizenship if I wanted," he said.

Oh crap.  He's unleashed the dreaded "Momma says" defense.


Which for a harvard -educated lawyer, Supreme Court litigator, and former deputy solicitor General of the United States is HI-Larious
 
2013-08-21 01:27:03 PM

Magorn: A Dark Evil Omen: sdd2000: Canada to Cruz: "Don't let the door hit you where the good lord split you, eh" Ted could not be a Canadian anyway, the Canadians are far to polite and he is not.

How did this become a stereotype? Us Canadians swear pretty much constantly. Americans will be relentlessly "polite" to your face.

Please, Kid I know you mean well and all but as long as we've known you, you never unnecessarily invaded another country, secretly toppled a democracy to install a friendly dictator, "liberated" a country for it's oil...etc, and you just GIVE everyone healthcare., and have you ever heard the phrase "Ugly Canadian" uttered about your tourists?  Sorry, I know you'd like everyone to thing of you as tough and nice, but you're just too damned NICE for it to stick


I hope you burn your bacon.  That nice enough for ya??

/I'm so sorry
 
2013-08-21 01:27:21 PM

stamped human bacon: "When I was a kid, my mom told me that I could choose to claim Canadian citizenship if I wanted," he said.

Oh crap.  He's unleashed the dreaded "Momma says" defense.


s3.amazonaws.com
 
2013-08-21 01:27:53 PM

Glenford: He's all yours America, along with Nickelback, Celine Dion and Justin BIeber.

/Suckers


There is trolling, and then there is evil. You, sir, are evil.
 
2013-08-21 01:28:00 PM
I'm afraid to ask the Canadian Texans I know if this isn't just a publicity stunt to get more Texans to acquire Canadian citizenship.
 
2013-08-21 01:29:43 PM

trotsky: Even the biggest asshole there, Harper, is a nice guy compared to this turbo douche.


I feel like Rob Ford could give Cruz a run for his money in the douche stakes.  Well, "run."
 
2013-08-21 01:30:57 PM

jake_lex: This shows what total fail the Tea Party is.  They embrace the Birther nonsense fully, and their Chosen One actually  wasborn outside the US.  Teabaggers never cease to be a source of amusement.


Well, they are working on the most detailed of technicalities. Their entire case is this: because there was no law saying that you are born an American if you have an American citizen parent and are born outside the US when Obama was born, they will do anything to say "there's no proof he was born in the US" to try to enforce that law. Of course the absence of that law doesn't mean you are NOT an American citizen by birth, it just doesn't say either way. What happens if they did get a case to a final judgement? The court would rule that everyone born before 1963 (or whatever year the law was passed) are also American citizens by birth. McCain is also a victim of this ambiguity.
 
2013-08-21 01:32:40 PM

Methadone Girls: Magorn: A Dark Evil Omen: sdd2000: Canada to Cruz: "Don't let the door hit you where the good lord split you, eh" Ted could not be a Canadian anyway, the Canadians are far to polite and he is not.

How did this become a stereotype? Us Canadians swear pretty much constantly. Americans will be relentlessly "polite" to your face.

Please, Kid I know you mean well and all but as long as we've known you, you never unnecessarily invaded another country, secretly toppled a democracy to install a friendly dictator, "liberated" a country for it's oil...etc, and you just GIVE everyone healthcare., and have you ever heard the phrase "Ugly Canadian" uttered about your tourists?  Sorry, I know you'd like everyone to thing of you as tough and nice, but you're just too damned NICE for it to stick

I hope you burn your bacon.  That nice enough for ya??

/I'm so sorry


See, we do say sorry a lot, but what Americans fail to realize is that to Canadians, sorry can mean many things, ranging from genuine apology all the way up to "fark right off and die in a fire, you mouthbreathing cocksucker."
 
2013-08-21 01:38:02 PM

Methadone Girls: Magorn: A Dark Evil Omen: sdd2000: Canada to Cruz: "Don't let the door hit you where the good lord split you, eh" Ted could not be a Canadian anyway, the Canadians are far to polite and he is not.

How did this become a stereotype? Us Canadians swear pretty much constantly. Americans will be relentlessly "polite" to your face.

Please, Kid I know you mean well and all but as long as we've known you, you never unnecessarily invaded another country, secretly toppled a democracy to install a friendly dictator, "liberated" a country for it's oil...etc, and you just GIVE everyone healthcare., and have you ever heard the phrase "Ugly Canadian" uttered about your tourists?  Sorry, I know you'd like everyone to thing of you as tough and nice, but you're just too damned NICE for it to stick

I hope you burn your bacon.  That nice enough for ya??

/I'm so sorry


depends, do you mean the deliciously crispy stips of pork fat we call bacon or that Round ham-like product you all try to pass off for the real thing?
 
2013-08-21 01:42:18 PM
Born in France to US military parents - had to formally renounce any claim to French citizenship at 18 to get a "Certificate Of US Citizenship". Funny part is there really is no way to "renounce" your citizenship - you can assert it at any time.  You can't undo where and to whom you were born.
 
2013-08-21 01:44:59 PM
I was waiting at reception to meet with a client (I'm in Calgary). The receptionist came over to tell me the client would be right up, and then while walking back to her desk, sideswiped the wall. She apologized....to the wall.

/Most Canadian thing ever.
 
2013-08-21 01:50:29 PM

Magorn: depends, do you mean the deliciously crispy stips of pork fat we call bacon or that Round ham-like product you all try to pass off for the real thing?


Canadian bacon is the same as american bacon. "Canadian bacon" is what you dorks call peameal bacon. If we're eating the former we'll say we're eating bacon. If we're eating the latter, we refer to it as peameal.
 
2013-08-21 01:51:44 PM

amishkarl: Magorn: depends, do you mean the deliciously crispy stips of pork fat we call bacon or that Round ham-like product you all try to pass off for the real thing?

Canadian bacon is the same as american bacon. "Canadian bacon" is what you dorks call peameal bacon. If we're eating the former we'll say we're eating bacon. If we're eating the latter, we refer to it as peameal.


Truth. "Canadian bacon", guys? That's an American thing. And it sucks. Real peameal bacon is godly.
 
2013-08-21 01:54:24 PM

God Is My Co-Pirate: trotsky: Even the biggest asshole there, Harper, is a nice guy compared to this turbo douche.

I feel like Rob Ford could give Cruz a run for his money in the douche stakes.  Well, "run."


give him a beer or two and he'll run up and down the Danforth making an a$$ of himself at least
 
2013-08-21 01:57:09 PM
No one in Canada eats what Americans refer to as "Canadian Bacon".
 
2013-08-21 02:00:21 PM

Magorn: A Dark Evil Omen: sdd2000: Canada to Cruz: "Don't let the door hit you where the good lord split you, eh" Ted could not be a Canadian anyway, the Canadians are far to polite and he is not.

How did this become a stereotype? Us Canadians swear pretty much constantly. Americans will be relentlessly "polite" to your face.

Please, Kid I know you mean well and all but as long as we've known you, you never unnecessarily invaded another country, secretly toppled a democracy to install a friendly dictator, "liberated" a country for it's oil...etc, and you just GIVE everyone healthcare., and have you ever heard the phrase "Ugly Canadian" uttered about your tourists?  Sorry, I know you'd like everyone to thing of you as tough and nice, but you're just too damned NICE for it to stick


You've obviously never seen the geriatric Quebecois snowbirds wandering around Florida in their Speedos.

*shudder*
 
2013-08-21 02:11:29 PM

Glenford: He's all yours America, along with Nickelback, Celine Dion and Justin BIeber.

/Suckers


Sorry you have to take bieber back or risk violating the terms of the Geneva convention :P
 
2013-08-21 02:16:24 PM

wildcardjack: Texans barely know where Canada is.

Sure we do. You take I-35 north until the speed limit signs turn metric.


Nope.  You'll end up in Duluth.
 
2013-08-21 02:18:04 PM

grimlock1972: Sorry you have to take bieber back or risk violating the terms of the Geneva convention :P


Sorry, we may have created him, but it was the US music industry that weaponized him.  He's your problem, you made him lethal.
 
2013-08-21 02:18:32 PM

threedingers: Magorn: A Dark Evil Omen: sdd2000: Canada to Cruz: "Don't let the door hit you where the good lord split you, eh" Ted could not be a Canadian anyway, the Canadians are far to polite and he is not.

How did this become a stereotype? Us Canadians swear pretty much constantly. Americans will be relentlessly "polite" to your face.

Please, Kid I know you mean well and all but as long as we've known you, you never unnecessarily invaded another country, secretly toppled a democracy to install a friendly dictator, "liberated" a country for it's oil...etc, and you just GIVE everyone healthcare., and have you ever heard the phrase "Ugly Canadian" uttered about your tourists?  Sorry, I know you'd like everyone to thing of you as tough and nice, but you're just too damned NICE for it to stick

You've obviously never seen the geriatric Quebecois snowbirds wandering around Florida in their Speedos.

*shudder*


You can keep them too.  *grins*  They go well with Celene Dion
 
2013-08-21 02:21:20 PM

rbaron71: No one in Canada eats what Americans refer to as "Canadian Bacon".


I always figured that "Canadian bacon" was just another word for back bacon, then I moved to the USA and realized it's something different entirely.

For the record:

Bacon (without any adjectives) = the same thing in both countries.
Back bacon = Something less common and totally different from regular bacon, but good in its own right, found in Canada.
Canadian bacon = A totally different meat that's common in the USA but rarely seen in Canada.

stream1.gifsoup.com
 
2013-08-21 02:22:12 PM

wildcardjack: Texans barely know where Canada is.

Sure we do. You take I-35 north until the speed limit signs turn metric.


LMFAO!!!!

*Tosses you a Shiner Bock*
 
2013-08-21 02:26:04 PM

Markus5: wildcardjack: Texans barely know where Canada is.

Sure we do. You take I-35 north until the speed limit signs turn metric.

Nope.  You'll end up in Duluth.


Meh, close enough for Moose & Squirell.
 
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