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(STLToday)   Woman wants to regain custody of your kids. Does she: C) break into a stranger's house and stab the homeowner repeatedly while looking for his car keys so she could drive to the next county and murder her ex-boyfriend and his family?   (stltoday.com) divider line 95
    More: Fail, Jefferson County, Jefferson County Sheriff, Christina Fudge, homeowners  
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6950 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Aug 2013 at 2:03 PM (34 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



95 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-08-19 01:54:56 PM
That's commitment.
 
2013-08-19 01:55:56 PM
Did she get her kids back?
 
2013-08-19 02:05:49 PM
Headline say what?
 
2013-08-19 02:05:51 PM
These people need to move to florida.  Fudge?  Squirrel hunting?
 
2013-08-19 02:06:24 PM
Retin-A is your friend. Failing that, Accutane.
 
2013-08-19 02:06:30 PM
YOU DONE FUDGED
 
2013-08-19 02:06:53 PM
Don't stick your dick in crazy... Well, ok, do, but don't get it pregnant!
 
2013-08-19 02:07:05 PM
She can have custody of my kids. I don't think I have any, but even if I do, I don't know them anyway, so what do I care?
 
2013-08-19 02:07:08 PM
grouchymuffin.com
 
2013-08-19 02:07:39 PM
Missouri whack-job trifecta in play.
 
2013-08-19 02:07:58 PM

Infobahn: Headline say what?


When did she have custody of my kids the first time?

/surprising, especially since I have no kids
 
2013-08-19 02:08:08 PM
Why does she want to regain custody of MY kids, subby?

/grammar National Socialist
 
2013-08-19 02:08:44 PM
Her ex was trying to help her move out and offered to get Fudge packed.
 
2013-08-19 02:09:55 PM
That's why you need a high-quality dead bolt, installed by a professional. And the strike plate should be secured to the door frame with three-inch screws.
 
2013-08-19 02:12:47 PM
stab the homeowner repeatedly while looking for his car keys so she could drive to the next county and murder her ex-boyfriend and his family

I'm pretty sure that isn't proper sentence construction as it implies she was simultaneously looking for his car keys and stabbing him rather than a linear sequence of events where one followed the other.
 
2013-08-19 02:13:23 PM
For squirrel hunting it was almost certainly a .22. I'm surprised he was able to hold her at bay with that.
 
2013-08-19 02:13:50 PM

Gergesa: stab the homeowner repeatedly while looking for his car keys so she could drive to the next county and murder her ex-boyfriend and his family

I'm pretty sure that isn't proper sentence construction as it implies she was simultaneously looking for his car keys and stabbing him rather than a linear sequence of events where one followed the other.


I pictured it as stab, look for keys, get frustrated, stab again, repeat.
 
2013-08-19 02:14:19 PM

Prof. Frink: Her ex was trying to help her move out and offered to get Fudge packed.


encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
 
2013-08-19 02:14:38 PM

Gergesa: stab the homeowner repeatedly while looking for his car keys so she could drive to the next county and murder her ex-boyfriend and his family

I'm pretty sure that isn't proper sentence construction as it implies she was simultaneously looking for his car keys and stabbing him rather than a linear sequence of events where one followed the other.


Multi-tasking, FTW!
 
2013-08-19 02:15:04 PM
Fudge?  Just call her delicious!
 
2013-08-19 02:18:34 PM

k2rider: Why does she want to regain custody of MY kids, subby?

/grammar National Socialist


Well, at least it's an ethos.
 
2013-08-19 02:18:43 PM
You know, when I think about the word "mother", I think murder.
 
2013-08-19 02:18:48 PM
I'm guessing she didn't think her cunning plan through very carefully.
 
2013-08-19 02:20:47 PM
"Fudge was staying on the same street but didn't know the victim. There was no connection between her and the man she attacked, Meinberg said."
"She had seen several cars parked outside his home and wanted to steal one to drive to Iron County, where she planned to kill her ex-boyfriend and two of his relatives in an effort to get her children back."

Maybe she should have kept that last part of the plan to herself.


"Meinberg said Fudge was under the influence of drugs or alcohol or both. She did not have a criminal history, he said."

Oh, Yeah. Ya think?
 
2013-08-19 02:21:39 PM
The man heard noises in his home and confronted Fudge, who stabbed him several times. As the man and Fudge were scuffling, the man's son heard the noise.
The son, 23, had been packing his guns to go squirrel hunting the next morning. He grabbed one of the guns and held the woman at gunpoint until police arrived.


What a potentially deadly situation.  I say we ban guns.
 
2013-08-19 02:23:07 PM

gopher321: That's commitment.


Not really.  Have you seen the price of bus fare these days?

It's out of control.

Thanks, Obama.
 
2013-08-19 02:26:05 PM
Subby, the proper way to fashion that headline would have been:

Woman wants to regain custody of your kids. Does she:
A) break into a stranger's house
B) stab the homeowner repeatedly while looking for his car keys
C) so she could drive to the next county and murder her ex-boyfriend and his family
D) All of the Above
 
2013-08-19 02:26:33 PM
The Aristocrats!
 
2013-08-19 02:28:33 PM
Her plan turned to brittle.
 
2013-08-19 02:31:25 PM

FrancoFile: Missouri whack-job trifecta in play.


Welcome to Missouri! Come for the delicious Fudge, stay for the squirrel-hunting.
 
2013-08-19 02:31:54 PM

Gergesa: stab the homeowner repeatedly while looking for his car keys so she could drive to the next county and murder her ex-boyfriend and his family

I'm pretty sure that isn't proper sentence construction as it implies she was simultaneously looking for his car keys and stabbing him rather than a linear sequence of events where one followed the other.


Look on the counter, STAB
check the pantry, STAB
jump up to see the top of the fridge, STAB
pull out the silverware drawer, pull out the junk drawer, STAB STAB
 
2013-08-19 02:33:30 PM
gopher321:  That's commitment.

Well yeah.....she ought to be.
 
2013-08-19 02:35:47 PM
She was charged with burglary, assault, and criminal action with a weapon, but not battery or attempted murder?
 
2013-08-19 02:35:52 PM
That's the problem with these quiz questions, they're so broad based they could apply to anyone.
 
2013-08-19 02:36:26 PM
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-08-19 02:37:24 PM
Why was this even necessary in the first place.  She has a vag, all she has to do is ask the judge for custody and he'll grant it.  Hell he'll probably throw in some spousal welfare because fark men.
 
2013-08-19 02:37:41 PM

BadReligion: She was charged with burglary, assault, and criminal action with a weapon, but not battery or attempted murder?


Guess it was more skewered than battered.
 
2013-08-19 02:38:16 PM
Fail tag for headline?
 
2013-08-19 02:38:19 PM
Run and hide your crazy and start actin' like a lady!
 
2013-08-19 02:41:54 PM
Touching
 
2013-08-19 02:42:01 PM
My sons and I would have locked her in the basement.  Then went to the hospital to get stitched up.. then back to the house to play with our new toy.
 
2013-08-19 02:42:06 PM
Guess I'd better stop hiding my keys in my body, then.
 
2013-08-19 02:43:47 PM

Brick-House: Subby, the proper way to fashion that headline would have been:

Woman wants to regain custody of your kids. Does she:
A) break into a stranger's house
B) stab the homeowner repeatedly while looking for his car keys
C) so she could drive to the next county and murder her ex-boyfriend and his family
D) All of the Above


I'll lobby to have an asterisk put next to my greenlight count.  What am I up to now, anyway? 3?  Bah, who cares.  I'm off to go squirrel-hunting anyway.
 
2013-08-19 02:45:27 PM
Squirrel hunting? Oh, Missouri.
 
2013-08-19 02:45:33 PM

Brick-House: Subby, the proper way to fashion that headline would have been:

Woman wants to regain custody of your kids. Does she:
A) break into a stranger's house
B) stab the homeowner repeatedly while looking for his car keys
C) so she could drive to the next county and murder her ex-boyfriend and his family
D) All of the Above


Your C choice is poorly worded to indicate it comes after another item in a sequence.  See me after class.
 
2013-08-19 02:46:20 PM

another cultural observer: Brick-House: Subby, the proper way to fashion that headline would have been:

Woman wants to regain custody of your kids. Does she:
A) break into a stranger's house
B) stab the homeowner repeatedly while looking for his car keys
C) so she could drive to the next county and murder her ex-boyfriend and his family
D) All of the Above

I'll lobby to have an asterisk put next to my greenlight count.  What am I up to now, anyway? 3?  Bah, who cares.  I'm off to go squirrel-hunting anyway.


Nah, non-sensical headlines always get lit up.  You did just fine.
 
2013-08-19 02:51:45 PM

Genju:


Whoa, haven't thought of that one in a looooong time.
 
2013-08-19 02:52:22 PM

Prof. Frink: Genju:

Whoa, haven't thought of that one in a looooong time.


Whoa, mobile-site quoting-of-embedded-image fail.
 
2013-08-19 02:52:37 PM
Headline fails for not making a fudge joke.
 
2013-08-19 02:55:23 PM

Keeve: Gergesa: stab the homeowner repeatedly while looking for his car keys so she could drive to the next county and murder her ex-boyfriend and his family

I'm pretty sure that isn't proper sentence construction as it implies she was simultaneously looking for his car keys and stabbing him rather than a linear sequence of events where one followed the other.

Look on the counter, STAB
check the pantry, STAB
jump up to see the top of the fridge, STAB
pull out the silverware drawer, pull out the junk drawer, STAB STAB


I now have a mental picture of her doing the stabbing on her way down from jumping to see the top of the fridge.
 
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