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(Daily Mail)   How to smuggle deadly knives onto a flight. Step one: Buy deadly knives in departure lounge after security check (Not safe for work images in sidebar)   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 123
    More: Fail, pocketknife, Department for Transport, Swiss Army, eu regulations, baby formula, Valery Tolmachev, flights, Kazakh  
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20452 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Aug 2013 at 6:26 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



123 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-08-18 03:16:38 PM
Jeezus, what a bunch of pants-wetting ninnies.
 
2013-08-18 03:32:47 PM
We're all gonna' be cork-screwed!
 
2013-08-18 03:38:17 PM
Honestly, the thought of someone carrying a Swiss Army knife on a plane is less terrifying than eating some of the food they sell.  The reason the box cutters worked on 9/11 was that all of the passengers believed they would be bargained for and released.  Having said that, if you're going to confiscate pocket knives at the security gate, it's pretty farking stupid to sell them inside.  Same with lighters.
 
2013-08-18 04:39:13 PM
i.dailymail.co.uk

OHMYGHOD NON-LOCKING PENKNIVES!

This is why the sun long set on your Empire, you mewling quims.
 
2013-08-18 04:42:24 PM
Looks like Samwise Gamgee got some hipster glasses.
 
2013-08-18 04:53:54 PM

Hoban Washburne: Honestly, the thought of someone carrying a Swiss Army knife on a plane is less terrifying than eating some of the food they sell.  The reason the box cutters worked on 9/11 was that all of the passengers believed they would be bargained for and released.  Having said that, if you're going to confiscate pocket knives at the security gate, it's pretty farking stupid to sell them inside.  Same with lighters.


Read the article.  The knives are EU-compliant, you can board planes in most of Europe carrying blades less than 6cm in length.  In the UK, the knives would be confiscated because OOGABOOGA!
 
2013-08-18 04:56:44 PM

Hoban Washburne: Having said that, if you're going to confiscate pocket knives at the security gate, it's pretty farking stupid to sell them inside. Same with lighters.


What are the chances the rules for regulating vendors are entirely different from the rules for regulating passengers? And, anyway, have you ever heard anyone guarantee it isn't stupid?
 
2013-08-18 04:57:44 PM
Danger: After going through security, our reporter made two trips to the Victorinox store, which opened in March, and purchased the knives. The shop offers an array of knives and even sells knife-sharpeners

Knife-sharpeners people!  And I bet they didn't even have to submit fingerprints and go through a background check!
 
2013-08-18 05:01:52 PM
That guy looks like Piggy from Lord of the Flies.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2013-08-18 05:06:16 PM
Officially, EU regulations allow passengers to travel with bladed items no longer than 6cm - the  Swiss Army knife is the same length -

So what is the article about now? 

Since the cockpit doors have been reenforced I don't think you are going to be hijacking a plane with a 6cm non-locking blade pocket knife that doesn't violate the regulations.
 
2013-08-18 05:21:41 PM
I thought those locking cockpit doors were supposed to render this threat moot.

Also, it's not unheard of for passengers to fark up some asshole running amok. The real surprise here is that Porkins here didn't get his ass beat on that flight.
 
2013-08-18 05:33:24 PM
I'm still amazed that 3 planes were hijacked using box cutters.

dj_bigbird: Jeezus, what a bunch of pants-wetting ninnies.


I know.
 
2013-08-18 06:01:24 PM

Slaxl: I'm still amazed that 3 planes were hijacked using box cutters.


Not 4?
 
2013-08-18 06:04:44 PM

doyner: Slaxl: I'm still amazed that 3 planes were hijacked using box cutters.

Not 4?


Yeah, but the hijacking of the 4th didn't go smoothly enough to consider it properly hijacked.
 
2013-08-18 06:06:07 PM

Therion: This is why the sun long set on your Empire, you mewling quims.


*pssst. it's setting on the 'murkan empire too.
 
2013-08-18 06:08:43 PM

Slaxl: doyner: Slaxl: I'm still amazed that 3 planes were hijacked using box cutters.

Not 4?

Yeah, but the hijacking of the 4th didn't go smoothly enough to consider it properly hijacked.


Did the flight proceed from its origin to its intended destination?  If it wasn't, due to malfeasance on the part of people on board, it was hijacked.
 
2013-08-18 06:29:45 PM
Pre 9/11: "Everybody be cool. This is a hijacking". Everyone is cool. Plane is forced to land in Tunis or Athens or Havana and sits on the Tarmac. Negotiations are made. American military or noticeably Israeli passenger is killed. Maybe a stewardess in the initial attack to prove "they mean business". Everyone else released eventuality.

Post 9/11: "everybody be cool this is a....". Before he finishes the sentence, passengers swarm the guy and pummel him with whatever weapons can be improvised.

That, plus reinforced cockpit doors are the real post-sept 11th security change. The rest is all window dressing.
 
2013-08-18 06:34:10 PM

Slaxl: I'm still amazed that 3 planes were hijacked using box cutters.


That worked because the "official" advice at the time was cooperate, not take any risks and wait for the plane to land and negotiation/rescue. That's the retarded thing about the pointless measures taken like banning box cutters, from 9/11 on anyone trying to hijack a plane will get the crap beaten out of him unless he's carrying an Uzi or worse. They literally didn't need to do a thing and it would not have happened again, though to be fair the armored cockpit door makes sense.
 
2013-08-18 06:34:37 PM
Well it's not like you could really do anything significant with a knife that small.....
 
2013-08-18 06:35:35 PM

Bill_Wick's_Friend: Pre 9/11: "Everybody be cool. This is a hijacking". Everyone is cool. Plane is forced to land in Tunis or Athens or Havana and sits on the Tarmac. Negotiations are made. American military or noticeably Israeli passenger is killed. Maybe a stewardess in the initial attack to prove "they mean business". Everyone else released eventuality.

Post 9/11: "everybody be cool this is a....". Before he finishes the sentence, passengers swarm the guy and pummel him with whatever weapons can be improvised.

That, plus reinforced cockpit doors are the real post-sept 11th security change. The rest is all window dressing.


Okay, that teaches me for not refreshing before posting. Now it just looks like I copied what you said.
 
2013-08-18 06:35:47 PM
I'm having a hard time taking this seriously because that guy looks like a huge douchenozzle.

You know what I hate? You're on a long flight from the US to someplace in Europe with a connection in Europe. You get off your first flight with a bottle of water in your bag. You head through the airport to your next gate and suddenly in the middle of the farking secure area is another goddamn checkpoint. You're tired so you forget that damn bottle of water in your bag so it takes farking forever to clear the checkpoint. I've done this twice now. Never gets old, I tell you! Just ask my wife...
 
2013-08-18 06:35:51 PM
Wait!, The TSA is only there as a illusion of our safety? Next your going to tell me that the police don't have to respond when I dial 911.


/warren vs District of Columbia
 
2013-08-18 06:36:53 PM
Holy sharp pointy objects batman!

If they lock the flight deck; there's no way you're getting in with a Swiss Army knife. Besides; those knives aren't known for their deadliness or their sharpness right out of the box.
 
2013-08-18 06:38:32 PM

Fark It: Read the article.


Whoops, you caught me.  Honestly I was going to read it, but my eyes kept rolling back into my head.  I swear!
 
2013-08-18 06:39:26 PM
Are they next to the C4 or near the detonators?
 
2013-08-18 06:40:17 PM
i.dailymail.co.uk
FEAR MY +2 CORKSCREWS OF DESTRUCTION!!!
 
2013-08-18 06:41:56 PM
I remember a story from a guy who was able to carry on a reproduction longsword because it was considered decorative. Not because it was too long to use on an airplane.
 
2013-08-18 06:42:24 PM
My Swiss Army knife couldn't fit in carry-on.....

www.toxel.com
 
2013-08-18 06:42:42 PM
What exactly makes them deadlier than box cutters? The mini saw?
 
2013-08-18 06:43:46 PM

Fark It: Hoban Washburne: Honestly, the thought of someone carrying a Swiss Army knife on a plane is less terrifying than eating some of the food they sell.  The reason the box cutters worked on 9/11 was that all of the passengers believed they would be bargained for and released.  Having said that, if you're going to confiscate pocket knives at the security gate, it's pretty farking stupid to sell them inside.  Same with lighters.

Read the article.  The knives are EU-compliant, you can board planes in most of Europe carrying blades less than 6cm in length.  In the UK, the knives would be confiscated because OOGABOOGA!


it's worse in the US. Bring on any sharpy
 
2013-08-18 06:44:31 PM
In fairness, I'm sure you could kill someone with one of those. But I'm also sure you could kill someone with a spoon.
 
2013-08-18 06:45:19 PM
You can cause just about as much damage with car keys as you can with knives.
 
2013-08-18 06:46:30 PM
In Kenyatta airport in Nairobi (the one that just burned) they were selling working bows and arrows (not toys) in one of the airport stores at least as late as 2004. A girl I was with bought one for her Dad and took it on the plane home. We had a plane change in Amsterdam and they stopped her there (the flight attendant took it and locked it in the flight cabin and gave it back to her after we landed in the States), but they didn't even blink on the flight from Nairobi to Amsterdam.
 
2013-08-18 06:46:34 PM

TheGreatGazoo: You can cause just about as much damage with car keys as you can with knives.


Oh really? Would you rather be stabbed with a car key or an 8" freshly-sharpened knife with a hardened steel blade?
 
2013-08-18 06:47:02 PM
I wish I wasnt too much of a techno retard that I could post a picture. I have a 2 year old son who looks just like this whistle blower
 
2013-08-18 06:47:54 PM

Chinchillazilla: In fairness, I'm sure you could kill someone with one of those. But I'm also sure you could kill someone with a spoon.


3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-08-18 06:49:45 PM
If terrorist tried the exact same thing they tried on 9-11-2001, I don't think it would play out the same this time with hindsight.

In fact they might get a few people then they would be in for a world of hurt once group dynamics kicked in.
 
2013-08-18 06:51:28 PM
Obviously, tapping our phones isn't working.  Now NSA requires all Americans to wear an eavesdropping probe up their ass...for their own protection.
 
2013-08-18 06:51:59 PM

Chinchillazilla: In fairness, I'm sure you could kill someone with one of those. But I'm also sure you could kill someone with a spoon.


The handle of a toothbrush makes a good shank.
 
2013-08-18 07:00:44 PM
So this is what a Daily Mail journalist looks like? Everything suddenly makes sense.
 
2013-08-18 07:08:05 PM
That's outrageous.

Nobody needs more than one Swiss Army Knife.
 
2013-08-18 07:09:10 PM
I could kill you with one of those wet towelettes you ge on the red-eye. I could murder the entire crew with a USB cable and my Macbook Air. I'm a walking god damned nightmare, a lethal combination of sheer physical mastery and cruel, calculating logic, an authentic living badass, and i think this is a complete crock of shiat.
 
2013-08-18 07:14:58 PM
i1211.photobucket.com

YOU WILL NOT RECLINE!
 
2013-08-18 07:16:38 PM
img.fark.net

lh5.ggpht.com
 
2013-08-18 07:17:34 PM
reminds me of an airport I went to where the convenience shoppe in the "secure area" was giving out as many complimentary matches as you wanted pretty much if you bought cigarettes. This was when there was like a "two books of matches" limit or some such.
 
2013-08-18 07:20:38 PM
The penis mightier than the sword.

i19.photobucket.com
 
2013-08-18 07:21:47 PM
Oh yeah, and Turd Ferguson.
 
2013-08-18 07:22:29 PM
Beiber isn't fooling me with those crappy glasses.
 
2013-08-18 07:23:16 PM

Slaxl: I'm still amazed that 3 planes were hijacked using box cutters.

The truth is that we know relatively little about the weapons they used on 9/11.


2. The misconceptionWe know how the hijackers seized the planes.Within days of Sept. 11, Americans believed they knew how the planes were grabbed: Terrorists had taken control by stabbing pilots, passengers, and flight attendants with box cutters and knives.

What's wrong with the story: It's incomplete and misleading. We don't really know what happened on the planes. The cockpit voice recorder survived neither New York crash and was damaged beyond salvage in the Pentagon crash. The Flight 93 voice recorder doesn't start until several minutes after the hijackers took the plane. What little we know about tactics and weapons comes from phones calls made by passengers and flight attendants. As

http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/hey_wait_a_minute/2 003 /09/what_you_think_you_know_about_sept_11_.html
 
2013-08-18 07:25:21 PM
In one of the duty free shops in the Osaka airport, after you go through security, they sell full size chef knives. Ceramic blades too, like razors.
 
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