If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(CBS Sports)   Baseball announcer Joe Buck sucks so bad people complain about him ruining games he didn't even announce   (cbssports.com) divider line 41
    More: Amusing, baseball, evils, Epic Games, Adrian Beltre  
•       •       •

1611 clicks; posted to Sports » on 18 Aug 2013 at 6:33 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



41 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-08-18 04:49:07 PM
Stop pissing in people's shoes and riding your father's coattails and maybe we'll talk about you not deserving the scorn, mmkay?
 
2013-08-18 05:00:30 PM
He swings...

...

...

it's back...

...
...
home run.

Thirty seconds of Joe Buck baseball announcing.
 
2013-08-18 05:13:42 PM

kronicfeld: He swings...

...

...

it's back...

...
...
home run.

Thirty seconds Twenty years of Joe Buck baseball announcing.


FTFY.
 
2013-08-18 05:15:28 PM
Came for the shoepisser reference, leaving satisfied.

/Just looked that up yesterday
//Still funny
 
2013-08-18 06:04:33 PM

Adolf Oliver Nipples: Came for the shoepisser reference, leaving satisfied.

/Just looked that up yesterday
//Still funny


It's Fark Law that the story is mentioned the second he is.
 
2013-08-18 06:40:44 PM
the scorn wouldn't be there if he didn't suck
 
2013-08-18 06:44:05 PM
JB and Troy Aikman doing Giants games annoys me since they both hate NYG. Hell, Buck hates all NY area teams in every sport....
 
2013-08-18 06:47:30 PM

NYRBill: Troy Aikman doing Giants games


"I agree, Joe"

"Good point, Joe"

"Joe, that's right"

"You said it, Joe"

"Yup."

"I agree with you, Joe"
 
2013-08-18 07:05:04 PM
Joe Buck is part of the reason I installed a switch in-line with the center speaker of my surround setup. Now whenever the commentary sucks, I can just flip a switch and get just the ambient stadium sounds. Works pretty well.
 
2013-08-18 07:05:08 PM
Don't understand the couch anger--I like Buck/Aikman for NFL games, far more thAn all others.
 
2013-08-18 07:10:15 PM
Joe Buck->heel Michael Cole

/whar summerslam whar
 
2013-08-18 07:20:23 PM
The funny thing is maybe he is the best announcer around since everyone seems to think he hates their team...
 
2013-08-18 07:35:40 PM
He doesn't suck because he's biased. He sucks because he's too dry and doesn't seem all that interested in the sports he's covering. He doesn't add anything to the game at all. And being paired with McCarver doesn't help matters
 
2013-08-18 07:41:58 PM
Did somebody say "Joe Buck thread"?

For the uninitiated ...

Joe Buck Pissed In My Shoes
a short narrative by NakedReporta

Back when I was 11 and living in St. Louis, my parents decided I was too smart to be wasting my time in public schools and started seeking out private schools. The choice was eventually narrowed to two: John Burroughs and Country Day. I took the admittance test for each, but a kid I really hated from the public school I had attended was also trying to get into Burroughs, so I tanked that test.

Come fall, I was a seventh-grader at St. Louis Country Day School (known as CODASCO for short), whose famous alums include Vincent Price and John Danforth. And so began a year of sheer living hell. Most of the kids at CODASCO came from monied families, while I was this socially inept middle-class kid who wore the same Sears-bought suit every day. I was an immediate target.

One of my classmates was Joe Buck, the son of legendary Cardinals announcer Jack Buck. Joe was kind of a big, fat kid, but he had all the airs of social entitlement. Typical of the kind of stupid crap Buck would pull on me was to ask me if I "knew" my mother or to mock my attire. On more than one occasion, he was one of the ringleaders as five or six kids would decide to simultaneously throttle me.

But the final indignity came on a spring afternoon when we had gym class. We all changed into our standard-issue t-shirts and shorts and trotted out to the baseball field. All, that is, except Joe Buck, who bolted out of the locker room about a minute behind the rest. And when gym period was over, and we returned to the locker room, there were my Docksides-knockoff loafers, filled with the acrid stench of urine. Buck denied it, and the gym teacher didn't really give a shiat.

I had to wear my gym sneakers the rest of the day, then tearfully explain to my parents what had happened. They decided to press the issue, and it culminated in Joe and his mom and my mother and I all meeting with the headmaster. Joe denied it, I couldn't prove it, and the headmaster made us shake hands. I knew the remaining months were only going to be worse. The group beatings and mockery intensified. I barely passed my way through the seventh grade, and the next year I was back in public school. The torment continued -- hey, I was a real dork -- but at least it was free.

Look, kids can do cruel things. Joe was looking to be one of the guys, and I was an easy mark. He couldn't have any idea that my home life was simultaneously crumbling, and that what could have been a respite (time in school, away from home) was instead just compounding my nightmare. I suppose I should forgive the guy. But I can't.

I've managed to slog through a pretty respectable career as a writer. Joe, with his family ties and -- even I have to admit -- considerable talent, is the voice of FOX Sports. And every time I watch a marquee sporting event on FOX, I can't help but pause and reflect that, all those many years ago, that prick pissed in my shoes.
 
2013-08-18 07:44:35 PM

FriarReb98: Stop pissing in people's shoes and riding your father's coattails and maybe we'll talk about you not deserving the scorn, mmkay?

 
2013-08-18 07:48:52 PM
Joe Morgan makes Joe Buck sound like Vin Scully.
 
2013-08-18 08:03:35 PM

NakedReporta: For the uninitiated ...


Thank you. It never gets old. Ever.
 
2013-08-18 08:07:23 PM
Joe Buck is the worst announcer of any sport in the history of sports announcing. His father should've killed him.
 
2013-08-18 08:26:34 PM
Joe Buck isn't bad at all. I guess he's fun to hate because he gets the nationally televised games. He's witty at times and shuts up when the moment speaks for itself.
 
2013-08-18 09:25:18 PM
Joe Buck has talent? I just thought he was there to make Troy Aikman seem masculine.
 
2013-08-18 09:57:06 PM

Karma Chameleon: Joe Morgan makes Joe Buck sound like Vin Scully.


There were times when I'm wasn't sure if Morgan was even watching the games he was announcing.  The times where he was paying attention, he was straight up fabricating player info.
 
2013-08-18 10:00:05 PM
I hated Joe Buck before I even knew there were Choad Buck threads. Just glad to know I'm not alone.
 
2013-08-18 10:02:44 PM
Good to see NakedReporta in the thread.

/You, sir, have been a favorite of mine for many years
//Go Cards
 
2013-08-18 10:03:39 PM

Mark Ratner: Joe Buck isn't bad at all. I guess he's fun to hate because he gets the nationally televised games. He's witty at times and shuts up when the moment speaks for itself.


I don't know who the hell you think Joe Buck is, but we're watching two different announcers.
 
2013-08-18 10:10:45 PM

Karma Chameleon: Joe Morgan makes Joe Buck sound like Vin Scully.


Don't you ever mention those hacks in the same sentence as Mr. Scully.
 
2013-08-18 10:17:22 PM

Your Average Witty Fark User: Mark Ratner: Joe Buck isn't bad at all. I guess he's fun to hate because he gets the nationally televised games. He's witty at times and shuts up when the moment speaks for itself.

I don't know who the hell you think Joe Buck is, but we're watching two different announcers.


It seems the people who dislike him are more vocal than the ones who either like him or think he does an adequate job. I've met him in person at a local dive bar and I like the guy, so I'm biased I guess.
 
2013-08-18 11:19:23 PM
I'm not a Joe Buck fan .. but you have to admit getting on his case for a game he isn't announcing is pretty stupid.
 
2013-08-18 11:21:00 PM
The best Joe Buck moment in history came when he had to shut up while Justin Timberlake trolled him on national television.
 
2013-08-18 11:51:31 PM

Kouvre: The best Joe Buck moment in history came when he had to shut up while Justin Timberlake trolled him on national television.


Here it is,

Also a shout out to beer by JT. Classy guy.
 
2013-08-18 11:51:44 PM

Mark Ratner: Your Average Witty Fark User: Mark Ratner: Joe Buck isn't bad at all. I guess he's fun to hate because he gets the nationally televised games. He's witty at times and shuts up when the moment speaks for itself.

I don't know who the hell you think Joe Buck is, but we're watching two different announcers.

It seems the people who dislike him are more vocal than the ones who either like him or think he does an adequate job. I've met him in person at a local dive bar and I like the guy, so I'm biased I guess.


Oh I have no doubt that he's probably a nice guy. I don't know. I've never met him. But I've suffered through his announcing for years, sometimes for teams he doesn't know, sometimes for SPORTS he doesn't know. He'd be a nobody if it wasn't for his father. Just my opinion.
 
2013-08-18 11:54:32 PM

Your Average Witty Fark User: Oh I have no doubt that he's probably a nice guy.


Did you READ NakedReporta's story?
 
2013-08-19 12:14:35 AM

IAmRight: Your Average Witty Fark User: Oh I have no doubt that he's probably a nice guy.

Did you READ NakedReporta's story?


Assuming that story is true, which is a big IF...it was in high school!!! Let's hope we're better people than we were in high school for f*cks sake. I taped Larry Lester's butt cheeks together and I had to go to school on a Saturday and write an essay, and I felt bad for the kid, and learned my lesson.
 
2013-08-19 12:45:50 AM
"The media" Like the teams that bring in ratings and raise ad revenue. Obscure small market teams reaching the post season hurt both of those things.
 
2013-08-19 02:53:44 AM

uncoveror: "The media" Like the teams that bring in ratings and raise ad revenue. Obscure small market teams reaching the post season hurt both of those things.


And by "obscure small market teams" you mean "Any team not from New York or Los Angeles (and maybe Boston once in awhile)"...
 
2013-08-19 08:43:03 AM

Mark Ratner: IAmRight: Your Average Witty Fark User: Oh I have no doubt that he's probably a nice guy.

Did you READ NakedReporta's story?

Assuming that story is true, which is a big IF...it was in high school!!! Let's hope we're better people than we were in high school for f*cks sake. I taped Larry Lester's butt cheeks together and I had to go to school on a Saturday and write an essay, and I felt bad for the kid, and learned my lesson.


Um...why were you touching that boy's buttcheeks?
 
2013-08-19 10:01:16 AM
The reason he doesn't sound interested in the games he's covering is because he isn't. He doesn't even watch them. He has spotters telling him what to say at every given moment for the action on the field. Including player names and everything. Listen for the little pauses, its where he's looking over at a board to see what a spotter is pointing at to say. Then Troy comes in and puts his color on because he actually is watching the game and actually knows football.  I can't comment on baseball because I don't watch it.

Joe's part is scripted before the game even starts, and during the game he's being programmed like a robot in real time.
 
2013-08-19 11:32:13 AM

Adolf Oliver Nipples: NakedReporta: For the uninitiated ...

Thank you. It never gets old. Ever.


Agreed.  I haven't seen it in a while and was hoping it'd be here.  Still guffawable.
 
2013-08-19 11:43:45 AM

fastfxr: Don't understand the couch anger--I like Buck/Aikman for NFL games, far more thAn all others.


Bukkaikman absolutely clowns Dierdorf.

encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com
 
2013-08-19 02:03:38 PM
People think he's biased? I thought we all just knew he sucked.
 
2013-08-19 02:59:39 PM
 
2013-08-19 04:35:20 PM

robbiex0r: People think he's biased? I thought we all just knew he sucked.


Yeah, I never got any bias from Buck, just sheer unlistenable boredom. The guy is reading a script in that mediocre midwestern accent with the flat, emotionless tone of a rollercoaster attendant reciting the same safety briefing for the millionth time. The only time he puts any emotion (feigned or not) in his voice is when he does the ads for whatever product he's pitching to the beer-soaked masses that day.

Anybody remember that "slam a lama ding dong" commercial he did a few years back? The reason they pulled that ad so fast was because it perfectly encapsulates Joe Buck - he doesn't give two shiats about anything except a paycheck. He's the perfectly constructed boring, bland, middle-of-the-road, emotionless, neutral, white male sports announcer, designed in a lab to be as vanilla and nonthreatening as possible, to interfere as little as possible with the efficient running of the soulless corporate monster that is nationally televised professional sports.

He's the corporate face of faceless corporatism. He's the living embodiment of beige.
 
Displayed 41 of 41 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report