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(CNN)   Scandinavian ball-munching fish turn out to be a hoax. Mynd you, møøse bites Kan still be pretty nasti   (edition.cnn.com) divider line 51
    More: Followup, KAN, Moller International, true nut, snacks  
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3296 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Aug 2013 at 7:46 AM (49 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



51 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2013-08-16 07:48:45 AM
Win, Subby, Win.
 
2013-08-16 07:53:57 AM
I'm glad CNN discovered the hoax before they reported it as news.
 
2013-08-16 07:56:43 AM
Well, that's nuts.
 
2013-08-16 08:02:15 AM
The person responsible for the news article has been sacked.
 
2013-08-16 08:02:18 AM

daveUSMC: Win, Subby, Win.


No.
I mean, this story has Denmark, Eels & ball munching fish and the best subby could do is this tired old meme?

/fail
 
2013-08-16 08:04:12 AM
So, you're saying the whole story is bollocks?
 
2013-08-16 08:06:51 AM
Please tell me Scandinavian ball-munching blondes exist.
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2013-08-16 08:08:01 AM

GungFu: Please tell me Scandinavian ball-munching blondes exist.


they still exist... but they don't like you.

(or me, either, incidentally)
 
2013-08-16 08:11:20 AM

August11: I'm glad CNN discovered the hoax before they reported it as news.


That's what you get when your editors are 14 north Chilean guanacos (closely related to the llama).
 
2013-08-16 08:11:50 AM
A moose once bit my sister.

/thumbs up to subby
 
2013-08-16 08:11:57 AM
Well, now I gotta find a new place for the honeymoon. Dammit.
 
2013-08-16 08:13:36 AM
I bet they eat fish sticks
 
2013-08-16 08:14:31 AM
The fish is named
Bi Chew?
 
2013-08-16 08:17:12 AM
 
2013-08-16 08:17:25 AM
Scandinavian fish ball?
 
2013-08-16 08:18:01 AM

TheMysticS: Scandinavian fish ball?


Maybe fish-munching ball?
 
2013-08-16 08:20:37 AM

abhorrent1: daveUSMC: Win, Subby, Win.

No.
I mean, this story has Denmark, Eels & ball munching fish and the best subby could do is this tired old meme?

/fail


You were hoping for a hovercraft as well?
 
2013-08-16 08:27:55 AM

Night Night Cream Puff: A moose once bit my sister.

/thumbs up to subby


One bit my sister in the balls. Well, it was before she was my sister. In fact, it may be what gave my brother the whole idea.
 
2013-08-16 08:28:11 AM

DrPainMD: The fish that swims up your pee-hole is real, tho.


images.sodahead.com
 
2013-08-16 08:33:24 AM

DrPainMD: The fish that swims up your pee-hole is real, tho.


mantiseye.com
 
2013-08-16 08:34:07 AM

abhorrent1: daveUSMC: Win, Subby, Win.

No.
I mean, this story has Denmark, Eels & ball munching fish and the best subby could do is this tired old meme?

/fail


Hey, I had a Danegeld reference in my submission for the original story, and it got rejected. Don't hate the player, hate the game.

Plus, moose are funny.
 
2013-08-16 08:35:43 AM

amindtat: abhorrent1: daveUSMC: Win, Subby, Win.

No.
I mean, this story has Denmark, Eels & ball munching fish and the best subby could do is this tired old meme?

/fail

You were hoping for a hovercraft as well?


That would make my nipples explode with delight.
 
2013-08-16 08:39:41 AM
I just assumed that a fisherman happened to reel in a released pet shortly before it started bobbing on the surface.  I didn't expect a tropical fish to live in sub-arctic conditions for more than a few hours, though I was happy to know there were fewer naked dudes in the water.
 
2013-08-16 08:45:47 AM
no more talk of the dreaded candiru.
I'm hiking machu picchu next month..then kayaking on the amazon.
-shivers-
 
2013-08-16 08:53:46 AM

natas6.0: no more talk of the dreaded candiru.
I'm hiking machu picchu next month..then kayaking on the amazon.
-shivers-


So, don't pee in the Amazon, maybe ?
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2013-08-16 08:54:35 AM
Indiana DNR sent out a bulletin yesterday reminding people in Indiana to not put exotic fish in the rivers after finding a certain rare fish with teeth in one of our rivers.  Lots of fish-with-teeth incidents going on for some reason.
 
2013-08-16 08:55:54 AM
Still no cure for the dreaded Lutfisk.
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2013-08-16 08:57:10 AM

Diogenes: Still no cure for the dreaded Lutfisk.


images2.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2013-08-16 08:59:19 AM

wombatoftruth: amindtat: abhorrent1: daveUSMC: Win, Subby, Win.

No.
I mean, this story has Denmark, Eels & ball munching fish and the best subby could do is this tired old meme?

/fail

You were hoping for a hovercraft as well?

That would make my nipples explode with delight.


Scratched record again ?
 
2013-08-16 09:01:48 AM
Thank goodness. Got so tired of the FOX-owned NBC affiliate here running the story twice every newscast with forced fun "banter" between girl and boy news anchors for a couple of days.
 
2013-08-16 09:05:35 AM

capt.hollister: wombatoftruth: amindtat: abhorrent1: daveUSMC: Win, Subby, Win.

No.
I mean, this story has Denmark, Eels & ball munching fish and the best subby could do is this tired old meme?

/fail

You were hoping for a hovercraft as well?

That would make my nipples explode with delight.

Scratched record again ?


Lemon curry?
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2013-08-16 09:06:23 AM

PizzaJedi81: capt.hollister: wombatoftruth: amindtat: abhorrent1: daveUSMC: Win, Subby, Win.

No.
I mean, this story has Denmark, Eels & ball munching fish and the best subby could do is this tired old meme?

/fail

You were hoping for a hovercraft as well?

That would make my nipples explode with delight.

Scratched record again ?

Lemon curry?


More naughty bits.
 
2013-08-16 09:09:12 AM

BitwiseShift: Thank goodness. Got so tired of the FOX-owned NBC affiliate here running the story twice every newscast with forced fun "banter" between girl and boy news anchors for a couple of days.


"I certainly hope you weren't planning on skinny dipping, Dave."
"Not in THOSE waters Denise- heh -I think it's anit cold in that part of the ocean!"
"Yes, and you're not exactly impressive to begin with."
"Not to a woman who hasn't had a gag reflex in 20 years, no."
 
2013-08-16 09:11:59 AM
dammit to hell, those airline tickets are non-refundable. - Captain Kinky
 
2013-08-16 09:12:11 AM
Anyone who thought that was NOT a joke to start with should certainly be sacked.

This reminds me of a story...
One day, some guy caught a black pirahna in the Deleware river.  He delivered it to a local bait and tackle shop and put it into their enormous fish tank.  The fish got lots of press attention because, well, PIRAHNA!!!!  In the DELEWARE!!!

It just so happened that this shop was right across the street from where I was working.  For a tropical fish wholesaler.  Needless to say, I'm a bit more in the know about these sorts of things.  So, I went and had a look.  The thing was damned near 2.5 feet long.  And it had blunt teeth.  That was not a pirahna, it was a pacu.  Related, but nowhere near as dangerous, if at all.

But the press didn't want to be bothered with the truth of the matter.  It was much more interesting to scare the crap out of everyone.
 
2013-08-16 09:13:32 AM

d23: PizzaJedi81: capt.hollister: wombatoftruth: amindtat: abhorrent1: daveUSMC: Win, Subby, Win.

No.
I mean, this story has Denmark, Eels & ball munching fish and the best subby could do is this tired old meme?

/fail

You were hoping for a hovercraft as well?

That would make my nipples explode with delight.

Scratched record again ?

Lemon curry?

More naughty bits.


Do you like...photography?
 
2013-08-16 09:17:07 AM

Night Night Cream Puff: A moose once bit my sister.

/thumbs up to subby


I bit your sister once myself.
 
2013-08-16 09:17:16 AM

capt.hollister: natas6.0: no more talk of the dreaded candiru.
I'm hiking machu picchu next month..then kayaking on the amazon.
-shivers-

So, don't pee in the Amazon, maybe ?


Well, technically the Amazon drains almost half of S. America, so holding it may be a challenge. ;)
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2013-08-16 09:23:34 AM

telejester: Night Night Cream Puff: A moose once bit my sister.

/thumbs up to subby

I bit your sister once myself.


Everyone has "bit" his sister.
 
2013-08-16 09:24:43 AM
Dammit! Now what I'm a supposed to do with this bucket of bait?
 
2013-08-16 09:36:12 AM

rnatalie: The person responsible for the news article has been sacked.


The less we mention sacks in this discussion, the better.
 
2013-08-16 09:36:47 AM

durbnpoisn: Anyone who thought that was NOT a joke to start with should certainly be sacked.

This reminds me of a story...
One day, some guy caught a black pirahna in the Deleware river.  He delivered it to a local bait and tackle shop and put it into their enormous fish tank.  The fish got lots of press attention because, well, PIRAHNA!!!!  In the DELEWARE!!!

It just so happened that this shop was right across the street from where I was working.  For a tropical fish wholesaler.  Needless to say, I'm a bit more in the know about these sorts of things.  So, I went and had a look.  The thing was damned near 2.5 feet long.  And it had blunt teeth.  That was not a pirahna, it was a pacu.  Related, but nowhere near as dangerous, if at all.

But the press didn't want to be bothered with the truth of the matter.  It was much more interesting to scare the crap out of everyone.


Yeah, whenever these sorts of fish turn up in the wild in places like the Midwest or whatever, it's usually a pacu. Pacu are interesting and docile fish, so lots of people get them for their aquarium without researching them first to find out that they grow to be 5 feet long. And the market for 2 foot long or larger pacu is significantly smaller than that for the 5 inchers you see at fish stores. Basically, everyone who wants a fully grown pacu has one already. Zoos won't take them, either. You can't even GIVE them away. So, when you end up with one that has outgrown any commercially available aquarium, ( people that know what they're doing custom build tanks for them) your only choice is to euthanize it. Well, it turns out that people don't want to do that, so they take it and release it into the local river or whatever. of course, that's even more cruel than euthanasia, because in the fall when the water temperature starts dropping, the fish becomes progressively more distressed until it finally freezes to death. Aquarists who stock pacu are just plain irresponsible. ANYONE who knows what is involved in caring for them is more than willing to place a special order... IF they don't just wait for one to show up on Craigslist for free. So have them on your special order list? Fine. But if you keep them in stock, be aware that you're basically sentencing them to early death.
 
2013-08-16 09:44:16 AM
What an overbite on a fish might look like.
jetskibrian.com

Sheepshead..damn good eatin', but hell to clean.

www.outdoorlife.com
 
2013-08-16 09:45:37 AM

Maud Dib: What an overbite on a fish might look like.
[jetskibrian.com image 850x638]

Sheepshead..damn good eatin', but hell to clean.

[www.outdoorlife.com image 400x300]


I'd clean her fish, if ya know what I mean and I think you do.
 
2013-08-16 09:48:32 AM
Maud Dib:

..damn good eatin', but hell to clean.

[www.outdoorlife.com image 400x300]


What about the fish ?
 
2013-08-16 09:57:45 AM
I read that as bull munching.


/Need coffee
 
2013-08-16 09:58:10 AM

Maud Dib: What an overbite on a fish might look like.
[jetskibrian.com image 850x638]

Sheepshead..damn good eatin', but hell to clean.

[www.outdoorlife.com image 400x300]


Thanks for including a picture of your girlfriend.  Why is that lady holding her up like that?
 
2013-08-16 10:18:41 AM

Greek: durbnpoisn: Anyone who thought that was NOT a joke to start with should certainly be sacked.

This reminds me of a story...
One day, some guy caught a black pirahna in the Deleware river.  He delivered it to a local bait and tackle shop and put it into their enormous fish tank.  The fish got lots of press attention because, well, PIRAHNA!!!!  In the DELEWARE!!!

It just so happened that this shop was right across the street from where I was working.  For a tropical fish wholesaler.  Needless to say, I'm a bit more in the know about these sorts of things.  So, I went and had a look.  The thing was damned near 2.5 feet long.  And it had blunt teeth.  That was not a pirahna, it was a pacu.  Related, but nowhere near as dangerous, if at all.

But the press didn't want to be bothered with the truth of the matter.  It was much more interesting to scare the crap out of everyone.

Yeah, whenever these sorts of fish turn up in the wild in places like the Midwest or whatever, it's usually a pacu. Pacu are interesting and docile fish, so lots of people get them for their aquarium without researching them first to find out that they grow to be 5 feet long. And the market for 2 foot long or larger pacu is significantly smaller than that for the 5 inchers you see at fish stores. Basically, everyone who wants a fully grown pacu has one already. Zoos won't take them, either. You can't even GIVE them away. So, when you end up with one that has outgrown any commercially available aquarium, ( people that know what they're doing custom build tanks for them) your only choice is to euthanize it. Well, it turns out that people don't want to do that, so they take it and release it into the local river or whatever. of course, that's even more cruel than euthanasia, because in the fall when the water temperature starts dropping, the fish becomes progressively more distressed until it finally freezes to death. Aquarists who stock pacu are just plain irresponsible. ANYONE who knows what is inv ...


This is exactly the same situation with many types of catfish (red tails especially), snake heads, and some saltwater fish (like wolffish).  They get far bigger than anyone at first imagines, and they eat damned near anything they can fit into their mouths.
Snakeheads are a special problem because they can actually survive the cold.  They can wreak havoc on a non-indigenous environment.
 
2013-08-16 01:51:39 PM
Maud Dib -  there was a fish in that 2nd picture?
 
jvl
2013-08-16 02:53:17 PM
So you're saying that icy-cold lakes and streams are not harboring dangerous tropical fish? Please, tell me more...
 
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