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(The Smoking Gun)   Man tries the "My penis was on fire" defense to exposing his privates on airliner   (thesmokinggun.com) divider line 41
    More: Unlikely, Utah Man, TSG, airplanes, Provo  
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3873 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Aug 2013 at 1:33 PM (49 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



41 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-08-15 11:53:09 AM
We've all been there
 
2013-08-15 12:35:28 PM
Poor Nicholas Cage...
 
2013-08-15 01:34:34 PM
heh.   "The Smoking Gun".
 
2013-08-15 01:35:34 PM
They make a pill for that
 
2013-08-15 01:38:10 PM
Yeaaaaaaaah
My dick is on fiiiire
 
2013-08-15 01:39:20 PM
It worked for Robert Hayes.

\drinking problem, etc.
 
2013-08-15 01:40:24 PM
fire shoot out my dick
 
2013-08-15 01:42:29 PM
Subby is the perp in TFA?  What's with the unlikely tag?  Unless he was working with hot peppers while flying then went to the bathroom.  Now that's a fire down below.
 
2013-08-15 01:43:57 PM
Don't fark with Lambda Lambda Lambda!

mimg.ugo.com
 
2013-08-15 01:45:26 PM
My penis has never been the subject of an official investigation by the Department of Justice.
And frankly, I'm a little insulted.

/because it's a rather nice penis
//so it's their loss.
 
2013-08-15 01:46:20 PM

xanadian: Poor Nicholas Cage Bruce Springsteen...


www.classic45s.com
FTFY
 
2013-08-15 01:56:22 PM
Maybe the stewardessess were smoking hot.  No smoke without causing a fire!
 
2013-08-15 01:59:20 PM
It's all that thick, dry, undergrowth that's the cause.
 
2013-08-15 02:00:50 PM

megarian: Yeaaaaaaaah
My dick is on fiiiire


Kings of Leon'd
 
2013-08-15 02:08:41 PM
Just exposing his penis? If my penis was on fire on an airliner, I would expose it and rub it furiously.
 
2013-08-15 02:10:30 PM

NutWrench: My penis has never been the subject of an official investigation by the Department of Justice.
And frankly, I'm a little insulted.

/because it's a rather nice penis
//so it's their loss.


I work for the NSA and yes, it is rather nice.

/Can you turn to the right a little? It's a better angle for our camera.
 
2013-08-15 02:17:29 PM
The problem is there's no "Penis on fire" exception to exposure laws.

/I'd support adding those exceptions though
 
2013-08-15 02:22:00 PM
An August 14 search warrant affidavit sworn by Christensen has several temporal shortcomings FTFA

Makes it sound like a Star Trek episode
 
2013-08-15 02:24:33 PM
The tingly, minty cool of peppermint can hardly be confused with "burning".  Refreshing, perhaps.
 
2013-08-15 02:27:37 PM
One of the few times it's not wise to beat out the flames
 
2013-08-15 02:33:44 PM
images2.wikia.nocookie.net
 
WGJ
2013-08-15 02:34:44 PM
You ever put salt on your dick and let somebody lick it off?
 
2013-08-15 02:43:48 PM
My dick
My dick
My dick is on fire
 
2013-08-15 02:46:07 PM
Pen is on fire?
i.imgur.com
/it's still mightier
 
2013-08-15 02:48:00 PM
I actually believe his story... sorta.  No excuse for whipping it out while seated though.  Doesn't the FBI have better things to do?
 
2013-08-15 02:58:17 PM

MBooda: Pen is on fire?
[i.imgur.com image 452x505]
/it's still mightier


Her Bic is on fire?
 
2013-08-15 02:58:42 PM
Skoh Chin Wang?
 
2013-08-15 03:01:02 PM
That typically happens a few days after you pick up girls under the overpass.
 
2013-08-15 03:11:32 PM

berylman: I actually believe his story... sorta.  No excuse for whipping it out while seated though.  Doesn't the FBI have better things to do?


I say no reason not to.
 
2013-08-15 03:28:03 PM
I always use the "By the power invested in me by the honorable William J. Le Petomane, I hereby assume the duties of sheriff in and for the township of Rock Ridge" defense.


www.indolentindio.com
 
2013-08-15 03:28:57 PM
i.cdn.turner.com
stream1.gifsoup.com
 
2013-08-15 03:33:22 PM
Just switch from firey smoking penis to the new smoke-free e-penis. Worked for e-cigarettes.

/pissing of the FDA, FAA and the TSA all at the same time.
 
2013-08-15 03:46:58 PM
Jalapeener?

/Not quite Ballsack Conundrum, but a still a memorably epic thread
 
2013-08-15 04:07:06 PM
The last time this happend to me the doctor gave me a shot.
 
2013-08-15 04:12:19 PM
    img.fark.netencrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com
 
2013-08-15 04:34:01 PM
Peppermint oil on my penis? It's more likely than you think.
 
2013-08-15 04:45:38 PM
Penis on fire? You need this:

maherlawfirm.com

Pen is on fire?

www.elizacross.com

Then you need this:

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-08-15 04:46:07 PM
www.talkingeasy.com

Bit'O'Gristle: Peppermint oil on my penis? It's more likely than you think.


brokelyn.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com

Agrees.
 
2013-08-15 04:59:22 PM

megarian: Yeaaaaaaaah
My dick is on fiiiire


David Caruso's lament? Must've missed that episode...
 
2013-08-15 07:13:58 PM
Seems legitish, most flashers go for public places and obscure their plates if they are flashing form their cars. If he is that brazen about it, I'm sure there would be past accusations. Anyone who has eaten suicide wings then used the washroom without washing their hands before knows this pain.
 
2013-08-16 11:51:16 AM
Copycat!
 
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