If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Guardian)   500 "new" fairy tales discovered in Germany. Disney corporation stocks rocket on news of new mother lode of Public Domain property to exploit mercilessly   (theguardian.com) divider line 71
    More: Cool, public domain, sprouting  
•       •       •

6512 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Aug 2013 at 2:06 PM (48 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



71 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-08-08 11:51:02 AM
Well when do we get to get our hands on them???!!! Did I miss that part?!
 
2013-08-08 11:57:51 AM
Wolves in the Netherlands, fairy tales in Germany, ghost thieves in Sweden--the folklore weirdness trifecta is now complete and it isn't even Friday yet.
 
2013-08-08 12:00:23 PM
Sounds cool, but I get excited when I learn of previously unreleased Hendrix songs and am disappointed every time.
 
2013-08-08 02:02:22 PM
The Stinkiest Princess
The Tortoise and the Whore
The Boy who Picked his Pimples too much
The Little Pervert who Could
The Old Woman and the Very High-Fiber Breakfast
Goldilocks and the Three Twinks
Jack and the Really Sticky Booger
Rumpleforeskin
Snow White and the Seven Samurai
Prince Brown Eye and his Magical Lance
The Crack Whore's Apprentice
Hansel and Grendel
The Goblin who Never Changed his Underpants
 
2013-08-08 02:07:33 PM
Great headline, that was exactly my first thought reading this news.

Still, pretty cool.
 
2013-08-08 02:08:46 PM
Thumbs up, Subby.
 
2013-08-08 02:09:35 PM
Exploit, and  then claim copyright on.  You missed one bit  Subby.
 
2013-08-08 02:09:51 PM
German fairy tales tend to be pretty dark. Like Grimms'. I'd love to see Disney try.
 
2013-08-08 02:10:33 PM
I've always wondered why Disney hasn't tried to adapt "East of the Sun and West of the Moon" or "The Twelve Dancing Princesses" for their media stable. Maybe the odd talking dead horse's head, red-hot iron shoes or people eaten by wolves has put them off. But who wouldn't want to see a evil stepsister with a nose and chin three ells long?
 
2013-08-08 02:11:15 PM
Meh, Disney's having too easy of a time raping their past material and pimping teenieboppers to bother.
 
2013-08-08 02:11:25 PM
i976.photobucket.com
 
2013-08-08 02:11:33 PM
So, the creationists now have some new material for their......"science"?
 
2013-08-08 02:11:34 PM
Er wait, yeah, they've already used some of Grimms' stories.

/i'll show myself out
 
2013-08-08 02:14:00 PM
King Golden Hair.....Of F*ck Island?
 
2013-08-08 02:14:06 PM
It's not like Disney were faithful to the originals.
 
2013-08-08 02:14:24 PM
Considering a native German coworker used to tell me about how they looked for the body louse with the golden shoes, I can hardly wait to read these stories...
 
2013-08-08 02:14:28 PM
Maybe now I will get to see a Disney princess in a Dirdl

www.alcanthang.com
 
2013-08-08 02:16:25 PM
The article is dated March 5, 2012. Updates?
 
2013-08-08 02:16:38 PM
wasn't Star Wars and Marvel enough for those bastards?
 
2013-08-08 02:16:56 PM

KimNorth: Well when do we get to get our hands on them???!!! Did I miss that part?!


It's here but only available in German right now.
 
2013-08-08 02:20:50 PM
Fairy tales can't be locked away and become standards purely because they've been locked away. It takes centuries of nonverbal and verbal interpretations and misinterpretations for them to become lore.
 
2013-08-08 02:22:44 PM

FloydA: The Stinkiest Princess
The Tortoise and the Whore
The Boy who Picked his Pimples too much
The Little Pervert who Could
The Old Woman and the Very High-Fiber Breakfast
Goldilocks and the Three Twinks
Jack and the Really Sticky Booger
Rumpleforeskin
Snow White and the Seven Samurai
Prince Brown Eye and his Magical Lance
The Crack Whore's Apprentice
Hansel and Grendel
The Goblin who Never Changed his Underpants


It's Germany.

The Prissiest Princess
The Banker and the Hare
The Boy Who Cried Jew
The Little Engine That Could Take The Jews to Auschwitz
The Old Woman Who Lived With A Jew
Goldilocks And The Three Jews
Jack And The Bitter Herbs
Rumpleforeskin (only one you got right)
Snow White And The Seven CPAs
The Prince and His Jewgold Possessions
The Rabbi's Executioner
Himmler and Goring
The Goblins Who Stole German Wealth
 
2013-08-08 02:23:45 PM
 there is the tale of a maiden who escapes a witch by transforming herself into a pond. The witch then lies on her stomach and drinks all the water, swallowing the young girl, who uses a knife to cut her way out of the witch

How did the maiden get the knife?  Otherwise, I find the tale highly believable.
 
2013-08-08 02:24:37 PM

odinsposse: KimNorth: Well when do we get to get our hands on them???!!! Did I miss that part?!

It's here but only available in German right now.


If you feel the need to read fairy tales, there are plenty available now.

The federal budget
Ryan Seacrest's list of possible girlfriends
The GOP party platform
Why women love men
Why men love women
Why cats love men and women...
 
2013-08-08 02:25:03 PM
kmlockwood.com

Krampus is all up in this mofo.
 
2013-08-08 02:25:13 PM
Wrong, subby.
 FTFA: the collection also includes local versions of the tales children all over the world have grown up with including Cinderella and Rumpelstiltskin

Also:

 For example, there is the tale of a maiden who escapes a witch by transforming herself into a pond. The witch then lies on her stomach and drinks all the water, swallowing the young girl, who uses a knife to cut her way out of the witch.


Yep. Disney's all over that one
 
2013-08-08 02:25:13 PM
www.serenitystreetnews.com
 
2013-08-08 02:26:09 PM
Sweet, now Grimm has plenty of more source material for Season 4-7!
 
2013-08-08 02:29:52 PM
ecx.images-amazon.com
I blame Sergei.
 
2013-08-08 02:37:30 PM
Disney corporation stocks rocket on news of new mother lode of Public Domain property to exploit mercilessly

You forgot to add "while taking the illustrations/name changes of all of it that they will do and copyrighting all of it to the point no one can use the original w/o getting a SLAPP suit."
 
2013-08-08 02:37:41 PM
 
2013-08-08 02:38:21 PM

J. Frank Parnell: German fairy tales tend to be pretty dark. Like Grimms'. I'd love to see Disney try.


Alice's adventure through the looking glass were pretty damn dark yet Disney took it and ran. Sleepy Hollow, The Black Cauldron, and a lot of their earlier stuff had a dark streak as well.
 
2013-08-08 02:38:33 PM
i don't know about you guys, but i'm rooting for the turnip princess

/ if you know what i mean, and i think you do
 
2013-08-08 02:40:54 PM

ReverendJynxed: J. Frank Parnell: German fairy tales tend to be pretty dark. Like Grimms'. I'd love to see Disney try.

Alice's adventure through the looking glass were pretty damn dark yet Disney took it and ran. Sleepy Hollow, The Black Cauldron, and a lot of their earlier stuff had a dark streak as well.


pretty much all fairie tales are dark.  then disney takes all the horror out of the tale and gives it a happy ending.
 
2013-08-08 02:41:12 PM

A Leaf in Fall: Sweet, now Grimm has plenty of more source material for Season 4-7!


Welp, let's go all in:

Hey guys!  500 new episodes of Charmed!  Fat Piper gonna biatch at you!
 
2013-08-08 02:46:09 PM
We're probably safe - I doubt old German fairy tales were formulaic and reeking of egalitarianism, environmentalism, and fail.
 
2013-08-08 02:46:23 PM

pute kisses like a man: ReverendJynxed: J. Frank Parnell: German fairy tales tend to be pretty dark. Like Grimms'. I'd love to see Disney try.

Alice's adventure through the looking glass were pretty damn dark yet Disney took it and ran. Sleepy Hollow, The Black Cauldron, and a lot of their earlier stuff had a dark streak as well.

pretty much all fairie tales are dark.  then disney takes all the horror out of the tale and gives it a happy ending.


amapofthecountry.files.wordpress.com

I know, huh...
 
2013-08-08 02:46:26 PM

J. Frank Parnell: German fairy tales tend to be pretty dark. Like Grimms'. I'd love to see Disney try.


Just like Snow White, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Frog Prince, Rapunzel, etc.

Disney just can't make versions of the Grimm Fairey Tales.
 
2013-08-08 02:47:46 PM

pute kisses like a man: i don't know about you guys, but i'm rooting for the turnip princess

/ if you know what i mean, and i think you do


I see what you did there.
 
2013-08-08 02:49:27 PM
i350.photobucket.com
LOVED that show as a kid
 
2013-08-08 02:50:13 PM

FloydA: The Stinkiest Princess
The Tortoise and the Whore
The Boy who Picked his Pimples too much
The Little Pervert who Could
The Old Woman and the Very High-Fiber Breakfast
Goldilocks and the Three Twinks
Jack and the Really Sticky Booger
Rumpleforeskin
Snow White and the Seven Samurai
Prince Brown Eye and his Magical Lance
The Crack Whore's Apprentice
Hansel and Grendel
The Goblin who Never Changed his Underpants


This needs to be written now
 
2013-08-08 02:50:25 PM

MemeSlave: We're probably safe - I doubt old German fairy tales were formulaic and reeking of egalitarianism, environmentalism, and fail.


The formula is entirely based on old German fairey tales. Which were cleaned up by Disney and others.
 
2013-08-08 02:50:52 PM
 
2013-08-08 02:53:08 PM

phillydrifter: [i976.photobucket.com image 204x302]


cdn.chud.com
"Except for that time during WW2 when he made the Israeli propaganda film, 'ashkeNazi supermen are our superiors'"
 
2013-08-08 03:06:37 PM
Disney corporation stocks rocket on news of new list of 500 names they can paste on the same stupid sexist ultra-conservative board-developed set of three scripts they've been selling us for the past ten years, you mean.
 
2013-08-08 03:12:27 PM
theorellior: I've always wondered why Disney hasn't tried to adapt "East of the Sun and West of the Moon" or "The Twelve Dancing Princesses" for their media stable. Maybe the odd talking dead horse's head, red-hot iron shoes or people eaten by wolves has put them off. But who wouldn't want to see a evil stepsister with a nose and chin three ells long?


Way back in the early-1980s, Don Bluth strongly considered East of the Sun and West of the Moon for his studio's second feature, as a follow-up to The Secret of NIMH. However, animation for the Dragon's Lair and Space Ace video games delayed the start of production on the film -- and by the time those were completed, Steven Spielberg had come calling with his own animated feature idea: An American Tail ... making Bluth's East of the Sun and West of the Moon one of those "lost" films that never happened. -_-
 
2013-08-08 03:15:30 PM
500 new public domain stories that Disney will sue the shiat out of anyone who dares use them, because Disney owns all rights to all fairy tales.
 
2013-08-08 03:16:34 PM
If it's not Wilhelm Busch or Heinrich Hoffmann, I'm not interested.
2.bp.blogspot.com
www.gutenberg.org
/ah, fond memories of a grisly german childhood
 
2013-08-08 03:17:37 PM

FloydA: The Stinkiest Princess
The Tortoise and the Whore
The Boy who Picked his Pimples too much
The Little Pervert who Could
The Old Woman and the Very High-Fiber Breakfast
Goldilocks and the Three Twinks
Jack and the Really Sticky Booger
Rumpleforeskin
Snow White and the Seven Samurai
Prince Brown Eye and his Magical Lance
The Crack Whore's Apprentice
Hansel and Grendel
The Goblin who Never Changed his Underpants


Are these all porn parodies? Do they all already exist?

//afraid to google these
 
2013-08-08 03:19:48 PM

Arkanaut: FloydA: The Stinkiest Princess
The Tortoise and the Whore
The Boy who Picked his Pimples too much
The Little Pervert who Could
The Old Woman and the Very High-Fiber Breakfast
Goldilocks and the Three Twinks
Jack and the Really Sticky Booger
Rumpleforeskin
Snow White and the Seven Samurai
Prince Brown Eye and his Magical Lance
The Crack Whore's Apprentice
Hansel and Grendel
The Goblin who Never Changed his Underpants

Are these all porn parodies? Do they all already exist?

//afraid to google these



My favorite was "The Princess who could Pee through 50 Mattresses."
 
Displayed 50 of 71 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report