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(The New York Times)   JP Morgan to investors: Sooo, yeah, we're gonna maybe lose like, say, $7 billion dollars this year, and, uh, oh yeah, we might be going to jail too   (dealbook.nytimes.com) divider line 35
    More: Fail, JPMorgan Chase & Co., Federal Housing Finance Agency, trading loss, WaMu, settlement offer  
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3326 clicks; posted to Business » on 08 Aug 2013 at 11:58 AM (48 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



35 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-08-08 11:59:58 AM
"Might".
 
2013-08-08 12:01:43 PM
No one important will go to jail.  They own Obama and owned Bush.
 
2013-08-08 12:05:50 PM
I will believe it when I see it.
 
2013-08-08 12:08:28 PM
Grumpy_cat_good.jpg

Lets Not Make This Hard: I will believe it when I see it.


Also this. That "jail" will probably end up as probation or one year of house mansion arrest.
 
2013-08-08 12:08:57 PM

Lets Not Make This Hard: I will believe it when I see it.


it's enough that they're worried about it.   Besides I though Goldman Sachs had to the Options contract on US government , not JP Morgan
 
2013-08-08 12:20:39 PM

Magorn: Besides I though Goldman Sachs had to the Options contract on US government , not JP Morgan


It's more of a time-share.
 
2013-08-08 12:32:25 PM
But I'm sure lots of low-level employees who had nothing to do with this will lose their jobs to keep the share price up.
 
2013-08-08 12:32:58 PM
The first one is a shoe-in.

The second one ain't never gonna happen.

They'll put an uppity biatch like Martha Stewart in prison but they will never put the players away. Never.

/now they might let them commit suicide--like Ken Lay--then let the survivors claim heart attack so they can get the insurance
 
2013-08-08 12:39:07 PM

TheShavingofOccam123: The first one is a shoe-in.

The second one ain't never gonna happen.

They'll put an uppity biatch like Martha Stewart in prison but they will never put the players away. Never.

/now they might let them commit suicide--like Ken Lay--then let the survivors claim heart attack so they can get the insurance


A kid who steals a can of soda will get more time.
 
2013-08-08 12:51:16 PM
Good.  Fail already.
 
2013-08-08 12:55:56 PM
It's the New York Times, so it "might" be true. Probably not though.
 
2013-08-08 12:57:03 PM
"Was that wrong?"
 
2013-08-08 01:06:59 PM
HAHA! If only!
 
2013-08-08 01:20:21 PM

Nemo's Brother: No one important will go to jail.  They own Obama and owned Bush.


Indeed. Wake me if something actually happens. Going back to sleep.
 
2013-08-08 01:25:12 PM
Hey, but don't worry. The management team will still be receiving their 7 digit bonuses because job creators and furthermore.
 
2013-08-08 01:58:22 PM
Bad use of fail tag, subs.  Seeing any of those jackals go to jail warrants only the use of the Cool tag.
 
2013-08-08 02:00:36 PM

Eddie Adams from Torrance: Hey, but don't worry. The management team will still be receiving their 7 digit bonuses because job creators and furthermore.


Actually, I'll bet a lot of the core people responsible for the mess have been let go (lots of downzising in Wall Street).  But that just means they cry themselves to sleep at night on the enormous pile of bonus money they received when thinigs were flying high.  Too bad we don't have a practical method of getting back all the money paid out as bonuses to these ass clowns.
 
2013-08-08 02:02:17 PM
I read another article that said they were getting too cute with some investigation, then suddenly about eight government agencies looking in to them stopped playing ball.

Settlement offers rejected, phone calls going unanswered. Seems like they're scrambling a bit, but in the end cash will solve anything, and we can do it all again in a decade.
 
2013-08-08 02:04:08 PM

HotWingConspiracy: I read another article that said they were getting too cute with some investigation, then suddenly about eight government agencies looking in to them stopped playing ball.

Settlement offers rejected, phone calls going unanswered. Seems like they're scrambling a bit, but in the end cash will solve anything, and we can do it all again in a decade.


Probably more that the 5 year statute of limitations is coming up, and the Govt. needs to move their asses or get barred from prosecution.
 
2013-08-08 02:04:10 PM
The lawsuit was the latest volley from President Obama's federal mortgage task force, which has vowed to hold financial firms accountable for their role in the mortgage boom and bust that threatened to topple the American economy.

Nemo's Brother: They own Obama and owned Bush.


Yes, they're exactly the same.
 
2013-08-08 02:09:57 PM

Soup4Bonnie: Yes, they're exactly the same.


With respect to their policies on spying, permanent detention, and not going after the banksters they're exactly the same.
 
2013-08-08 03:20:57 PM
Democrats have no chance at re-election if they don't throw the bankers in jail.
 
2013-08-08 03:28:02 PM
America should actually emulate China and hand down capital punishment for severe white collar crimes.
 
2013-08-08 03:46:09 PM

Priapetic: Eddie Adams from Torrance: Hey, but don't worry. The management team will still be receiving their 7 digit bonuses because job creators and furthermore.

Actually, I'll bet a lot of the core people responsible for the mess have been let go (lots of downzising in Wall Street).  But that just means they cry themselves to sleep at night on the enormous pile of bonus money they received when thinigs were flying high.  Too bad we don't have a practical method of getting back all the money paid out as bonuses to these ass clowns.


If you read TFA, the primary case in question pertains to business inherited when JPM bought washington mutual.

So yeah, whoever was in charge at WaMu is long gone.

And why do YOU want to get the bonuses back? You didn't pay them, the shareholders did. Taxpayers made a great profit on their tarp loans to JPM. Or are you speaking on behalf of the owners of the banks?
 
2013-08-08 04:21:36 PM

Soup4Bonnie: The lawsuit was the latest volley from President Obama's federal mortgage task force, which has vowed to hold financial firms accountable for their role in the mortgage boom and bust that threatened to topple the American economy.

Nemo's Brother: They own Obama and owned Bush.

Yes, they're exactly the same.


Pretty much.

http://takingnote.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/03/07/banks-above-the-law/
 
2013-08-08 04:29:19 PM
I just came here to be the guy who busts on subby for using the dollar sign *and* spelling out dollars. Don't do that!
 
2013-08-08 04:45:50 PM

the_geek: Soup4Bonnie: Yes, they're exactly the same.

With respect to their policies on spying, permanent detention, and not going after the banksters they're exactly the same.


I'll give you #1.  #2 is Congress's doing, unless you think Obama should just pardon everybody in Gitmo and release them into the United States proper as free men (which is about the only thing he can do without Congress blocking it).  You'll also note that nobody new has gone to Gitmo under his watch.  #3 is party true.  There certainly have been a lot more large fines under Obama, although few to no jail sentences.
 
2013-08-08 05:16:27 PM
This will destabilize the whole cocaine economy in New York
 
2013-08-08 09:27:43 PM
I want Glass-Steagall back. My main bank is Chase and I like them. The customer service is good, the website is convenient and there's one on my block. Can we please split them off from the traders in JP Morgan?

/I know the charges are mostly stuff they inherited when they bought WaMu
//But still. Can we please have some sanity?
 
2013-08-08 09:42:56 PM
I'm with the "Nothing will happen" crowd. This announcement is just to avoid a huge hit to the stock price. These clowns have already paid off the appropriate people so no charges will actually be filed. There's no reason to be responsible when the overseers are unwilling to police these people.
 
2013-08-08 11:55:04 PM

AngryDragon: Good.  Fail already.


You don't want them them to fail. It doesn't affect the ones who made that decision. The workers who had nothing to do with executive shenanigans just lose their jobs, while the executives get their golden parachutes.

Unless a mass of executives (not just a few symbolic ones) go to jail for at least 5 years and lose at least 5 years of compensation, nothing will ever change, and the "capitalize the profits and socialize the losses" scenarios will continue, as long as they have both parties in their pocket.
 
2013-08-09 02:39:19 AM

Debeo Summa Credo: Priapetic: Eddie Adams from Torrance: Hey, but don't worry. The management team will still be receiving their 7 digit bonuses because job creators and furthermore.

Actually, I'll bet a lot of the core people responsible for the mess have been let go (lots of downzising in Wall Street).  But that just means they cry themselves to sleep at night on the enormous pile of bonus money they received when thinigs were flying high.  Too bad we don't have a practical method of getting back all the money paid out as bonuses to these ass clowns.

If you read TFA, the primary case in question pertains to business inherited when JPM bought washington mutual.

So yeah, whoever was in charge at WaMu is long gone.

And why do YOU want to get the bonuses back? You didn't pay them, the shareholders did. Taxpayers made a great profit on their tarp loans to JPM. Or are you speaking on behalf of the owners of the banks?


I dont care who gets the money, as long as it's not the ass clowns that caused the mess.
 
2013-08-09 09:05:57 AM
Not only will they remain immune from prosecution but they'll have Republicans mandating more tax breaks for them.

/It's good to be King
 
2013-08-09 11:01:47 AM
fines are just a maybe-tax to them, it was accounted for...
 
2013-08-09 11:22:36 PM

Debeo Summa Credo: Priapetic: Eddie Adams from Torrance: Hey, but don't worry. The management team will still be receiving their 7 digit bonuses because job creators and furthermore.

Actually, I'll bet a lot of the core people responsible for the mess have been let go (lots of downzising in Wall Street).  But that just means they cry themselves to sleep at night on the enormous pile of bonus money they received when thinigs were flying high.  Too bad we don't have a practical method of getting back all the money paid out as bonuses to these ass clowns.

If you read TFA, the primary case in question pertains to business inherited when JPM bought washington mutual.

So yeah, whoever was in charge at WaMu is long gone.

And why do YOU want to get the bonuses back? You didn't pay them, the shareholders did. Taxpayers made a great profit on their tarp loans to JPM. Or are you speaking on behalf of the owners of the banks?


Good. Now use your teeth a little.
 
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