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(Crawley News)   It was a very slow getaway: Tortoise goes on the run but after five days only makes it half a mile, and when safely back home owners discover the pet has changed sex   (crawleynews.co.uk) divider line 24
    More: Silly, tortoises  
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2426 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Aug 2013 at 7:06 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



24 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-08-06 07:13:40 AM  
static.tvtropes.org
Life, uhhh, finds a way.
 
2013-08-06 07:15:00 AM  
"He said: "There was no sign of Aston on Saturday and Sunday so I phoned the police on Sunday to report a missing tortoise."
Good grief.
 
2013-08-06 07:23:05 AM  
In other news, there's at least one mobile tortoise sex change clinic van roaming that neighborhood.
 
2013-08-06 07:42:06 AM  
Tortoise went to San Francisco?
 
2013-08-06 07:49:31 AM  

Boll Virtuoso: [static.tvtropes.org image 350x250]
Life, uhhh, finds a way.


Came for this, pleased to find it in the Boobies.
 
2013-08-06 07:55:07 AM  
i58.photobucket.com
 
2013-08-06 08:08:20 AM  
I had a pet tortoise who escaped. I like to think he's roaming the country, seeing the sites, rather than the likely alternative that he got eaten by a raccoon.
 
2013-08-06 09:33:15 AM  
The escaped turtle probably had the munchies, it seems like they always do, even my dogs don't like to eat like my turtle does.  I thought for sure Henry was going to crawl out of his aquarium the other day.  I think he could at this point-I need to re-arrange his bubbler waterfall so it's not so convenient.  After I fed him, he settled down.  His nickname is AquaPig because all he does is beg for food.  Turtles are cunning escape artists and I have learned to never underestimate that teeny amphibian brain of his.

/red eared slider
 
2013-08-06 09:37:34 AM  
Escaped reptile trifecta in play?

/they're heading for Yemen, launch the drones
 
2013-08-06 09:50:30 AM  
csb/ Last week my dog alerted me to the fact that 2 gopher tortoises had slipped under my garden fence.  Actually, one had gotten under, and the other was trying to follow-the-leader.  I'm no expert, but would say they were "teen-agers" in tortoise years.  I picked them both up and headed them off in a different direction.  One pooped on my leg.

/ingrate
 
2013-08-06 10:40:54 AM  

SoupJohnB: csb/ Last week my dog alerted me to the fact that 2 gopher tortoises had slipped under my garden fence.  Actually, one had gotten under, and the other was trying to follow-the-leader.  I'm no expert, but would say they were "teen-agers" in tortoise years.  I picked them both up and headed them off in a different direction.  One pooped on my leg.

/ingrate


Brave soul to pick up wild tortoises.  I don't even like to pick up my "pet" one.  He likes to bite and I have no desire to be bitten.  Although, now that I've owned a turtle for a few years, yeah, I'd probably pick up a wild one and turn him around in the right direction.  Still don't like handling them, tho.  With the beak and the claws and the poop and all.
 
2013-08-06 10:55:13 AM  

specialkae: SoupJohnB: csb/ Last week my dog alerted me to the fact that 2 gopher tortoises had slipped under my garden fence.  Actually, one had gotten under, and the other was trying to follow-the-leader.  I'm no expert, but would say they were "teen-agers" in tortoise years.  I picked them both up and headed them off in a different direction.  One pooped on my leg.

/ingrate

Brave soul to pick up wild tortoises.  I don't even like to pick up my "pet" one.  He likes to bite and I have no desire to be bitten.  Although, now that I've owned a turtle for a few years, yeah, I'd probably pick up a wild one and turn him around in the right direction.  Still don't like handling them, tho.  With the beak and the claws and the poop and all.


I put on a heavy-duty work glove.  That takes care of the beak and claws.  But not the poop. :)
 
2013-08-06 10:58:10 AM  

SoupJohnB: specialkae: SoupJohnB: csb/ Last week my dog alerted me to the fact that 2 gopher tortoises had slipped under my garden fence.  Actually, one had gotten under, and the other was trying to follow-the-leader.  I'm no expert, but would say they were "teen-agers" in tortoise years.  I picked them both up and headed them off in a different direction.  One pooped on my leg.

/ingrate

Brave soul to pick up wild tortoises.  I don't even like to pick up my "pet" one.  He likes to bite and I have no desire to be bitten.  Although, now that I've owned a turtle for a few years, yeah, I'd probably pick up a wild one and turn him around in the right direction.  Still don't like handling them, tho.  With the beak and the claws and the poop and all.

I put on a heavy-duty work glove.  That takes care of the beak and claws.  But not the poop. :)


Lol.  True.  Hope you have a heavy duty washing machine :)  Turtle poo stinks to high heaven and all I seem to do is clean out Henry's aquarium.  Have to do it every other day or so...
 
2013-08-06 11:25:49 AM  
The CRAWLEY News?

/notsureifserious.jpg
 
2013-08-06 11:43:10 AM  

specialkae: SoupJohnB: specialkae: SoupJohnB: csb/ Last week my dog alerted me to the fact that 2 gopher tortoises had slipped under my garden fence.  Actually, one had gotten under, and the other was trying to follow-the-leader. 

Brave soul to pick up wild tortoises.  I don't even like to pick up my "pet" one.  He likes to bite and I have no desire to be bitten.  Although, now that I've owned a turtle for a few years, yeah, I'd probably pick up a wild one and turn him around in the right direction.  Still don't like handling them, tho.  With the beak and the claws and the poop and all.

I put on a heavy-duty work glove.  That takes care of the beak and claws.  But not the poop. :)

Lol.  True.  Hope you have a heavy duty washing machine :)  Turtle poo stinks to high heaven and all I seem to do is clean out Henry's aquarium.  Have to do it every other day or so...


I've lived in Florida for most of my life.  Mostly in places where encountering a tortoise or turtle is far more likely than seeing a tourist. :)
 
2013-08-06 12:08:33 PM  
Hope springs a turtle.
 
2013-08-06 12:10:45 PM  
What is the obsession with "owning" an animal?  Enjoy nature in it's natural habitat....what a control freak.
 
2013-08-06 12:10:55 PM  
Gender, not sex.
 
2013-08-06 12:11:08 PM  
Maybe the turtle left in search of some lovin.'
 
2013-08-06 12:27:24 PM  

SoupJohnB: specialkae: SoupJohnB: specialkae: SoupJohnB: csb/ Last week my dog alerted me to the fact that 2 gopher tortoises had slipped under my garden fence.  Actually, one had gotten under, and the other was trying to follow-the-leader.

Brave soul to pick up wild tortoises.  I don't even like to pick up my "pet" one.  He likes to bite and I have no desire to be bitten.  Although, now that I've owned a turtle for a few years, yeah, I'd probably pick up a wild one and turn him around in the right direction.  Still don't like handling them, tho.  With the beak and the claws and the poop and all.

I put on a heavy-duty work glove.  That takes care of the beak and claws.  But not the poop. :)

Lol.  True.  Hope you have a heavy duty washing machine :)  Turtle poo stinks to high heaven and all I seem to do is clean out Henry's aquarium.  Have to do it every other day or so...

I've lived in Florida for most of my life.  Mostly in places where encountering a tortoise or turtle is far more likely than seeing a tourist. :)


I kinda inherited Henry.  He belonged to the ex-stepdaughter who shouldn't have owned him anyway.  Poor thing was half starved and kept all alone in a dark room except for his sun lamp with no interaction, ever.  I'm not saying he's smart or great or pettable (he's none of those), but he's grown to twice the size that he was and his shell isn't mushy anymore.  I feed him every day and the only time he bothers me is when he wants to be fed which is all the time.  I only feed him once a day.  I never in a million years would've wanted a turtle for a pet, but now I find myself strangely attached to him.  More so than the cats and dogs.  Maybe it's because he listens when I talk and doesn't bark back.  I'd lose myself if I lost Henry.
 
2013-08-06 12:28:36 PM  
And he's a survivor.  That's what I love most about my pet turtle :)
 
2013-08-06 01:00:59 PM  
I had a pet turtle once. Never bit me. Had him since he was itty bitty though. Tried it once, dared him (even though he didn't understand), just closed his mouth and let me continue petting him under his chinny-whinny.

Bit my mother. Asked what she did. She said nothing.

Everything seems to dislike my mother though.

/only bitten by my dog
/and my fish oddly enough. Didn't hurt as is tiny, but my biggest fish, bit of a WTF moment while cleaning its tank.  He has since let me touch him (while cleaning its tank) so I don't know know..
 
2013-08-06 01:13:37 PM  

UsikFark: Maybe the turtle left in search of some lovin.'


One of the older comedians like Newhart or Cosby once recorded a funny story about that very thing.
 
2013-08-06 01:16:56 PM  

Maggie_Luna: I had a pet turtle once. Never bit me. Had him since he was itty bitty though. Tried it once, dared him (even though he didn't understand), just closed his mouth and let me continue petting him under his chinny-whinny.

Bit my mother. Asked what she did. She said nothing.

Everything seems to dislike my mother though.

/only bitten by my dog
/and my fish oddly enough. Didn't hurt as is tiny, but my biggest fish, bit of a WTF moment while cleaning its tank.  He has since let me touch him (while cleaning its tank) so I don't know know..


What happened to your turtle?  Did he/she pass?  If so, very sorry.  Not so sorry that it bit your mom, tho.  Animals are a good judge of character.  I've been bitten by fish, but they were Oscars, so I have to excuse.

/razor sharp, itty bitty fish teeth hurt
 
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