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(CNN)   Boys at slumber party strangled by python which escaped the reptile store downstairs. Sadly this is real life, and not Tara Reid's latest B movie on Syfy   (cnn.com) divider line 221
    More: Scary, Tara Reid  
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7953 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Aug 2013 at 3:26 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-08-06 12:50:36 AM  
I hope one of 'em winked before their demise because that was the coolest shiat ever.

/sorry, this is an unspeakable tragedy
//still, would've been cool
 
2013-08-06 01:43:24 AM  
I wish some asshole who owns one of these things would come on here and explain the f*cking point of having a pet snake.
 
2013-08-06 01:53:46 AM  
designbordeaux.com
 
2013-08-06 01:57:23 AM  

Speaker2Animals: I wish some asshole who owns one of these things would come on here and explain the f*cking point of having a pet snake.


I had a ball python in college. But they only get to be 4 feet max, so no killing of kids involved. Well, maybe small ones in the womb but then we get into that whole argument of when life begins.
 
2013-08-06 02:16:40 AM  

thisisyourbrainonFark: Speaker2Animals: I wish some asshole who owns one of these things would come on here and explain the f*cking point of having a pet snake.

I had a ball python in college. But they only get to be 4 feet max, so no killing of kids involved. Well, maybe small ones in the womb but then we get into that whole argument of when life begins.


Snake abortions for everyone!
 
2013-08-06 03:24:37 AM  
farm7.staticflickr.com
 
2013-08-06 03:32:22 AM  

Speaker2Animals: I wish some asshole who owns one of these things would come on here and explain the f*cking point of having a pet snake.


It's kind of neat to watch them eat, the very first time you see it at least.

I...  I really don't know.  I lived with a rattlesnake for a few years, and other than it being kind of neat the first time I saw it eat I have no idea why the fark it's owner liked owning that thing.

She did kind of have a hoarder-style mentality about pets.  Maybe that was it?
 
2013-08-06 03:33:19 AM  
I call major shenanigans.

While it's just barely possible that an 18' adult python MIGHT kill a child, in the wild, if it was hunting; there is no conceivable reason a pet-store python would kill TWO boys, mostly because any kid could escape from a snake, especially if it was already coiled around another kid. Snakes aren't movie monsters--it's not going to kill one, leave the body, then go somewhere else to find a new victim. A hungry snake would try to kill one child as prey, then try to eat him. And then why didn't the other boy flee?

The boys died or were killed in some other way, and tearful mom is pretending it was a snake. We'll find that they died by CO poisoning or somesuch.
 
2013-08-06 03:37:10 AM  

Gyrfalcon: I call major shenanigans.

While it's just barely possible that an 18' adult python MIGHT kill a child, in the wild, if it was hunting; there is no conceivable reason a pet-store python would kill TWO boys, mostly because any kid could escape from a snake, especially if it was already coiled around another kid. Snakes aren't movie monsters--it's not going to kill one, leave the body, then go somewhere else to find a new victim. A hungry snake would try to kill one child as prey, then try to eat him. And then why didn't the other boy flee?

The boys died or were killed in some other way, and tearful mom is pretending it was a snake. We'll find that they died by CO poisoning or somesuch.


Umm,  or you high or just stupid?
 
2013-08-06 03:39:01 AM  
When "7 minutes in Heaven" goes terribly wrong
 
2013-08-06 03:39:24 AM  
Juuuust heard this story on NPR. Terribly, terribly sad...
 
2013-08-06 03:39:50 AM  

borg: Gyrfalcon: I call major shenanigans.

While it's just barely possible that an 18' adult python MIGHT kill a child, in the wild, if it was hunting; there is no conceivable reason a pet-store python would kill TWO boys, mostly because any kid could escape from a snake, especially if it was already coiled around another kid. Snakes aren't movie monsters--it's not going to kill one, leave the body, then go somewhere else to find a new victim. A hungry snake would try to kill one child as prey, then try to eat him. And then why didn't the other boy flee?

The boys died or were killed in some other way, and tearful mom is pretending it was a snake. We'll find that they died by CO poisoning or somesuch.

Umm,  or you high or just stupid?


He's got a point, but he's forgetting something.

Snakes don't just kill things. But 5 year old boys don't just leave shiat alone, either.

My guess is snake comes out of the ventilation shaft, boys antagonize it, it wraps around them with fatal results.
 
2013-08-06 03:40:18 AM  
At my slumber parties the only dangerous snake was my drunk uncles.

/only came out in the dark
//never killed anyone though (maybe emotionally)
 
2013-08-06 03:41:50 AM  
Something really doesn't sound right though.  It just happened to escape the enclosure, find its way to a ventilation shaft, crawl through it, and kill not 1 but 2 kids?  Sounds like something in a Sherlock Holmes novel.
 
2013-08-06 03:43:08 AM  

borg: Gyrfalcon: I call major shenanigans.

While it's just barely possible that an 18' adult python MIGHT kill a child, in the wild, if it was hunting; there is no conceivable reason a pet-store python would kill TWO boys, mostly because any kid could escape from a snake, especially if it was already coiled around another kid. Snakes aren't movie monsters--it's not going to kill one, leave the body, then go somewhere else to find a new victim. A hungry snake would try to kill one child as prey, then try to eat him. And then why didn't the other boy flee?

The boys died or were killed in some other way, and tearful mom is pretending it was a snake. We'll find that they died by CO poisoning or somesuch.

Umm,  or you high or just stupid?


Sorry, I'm with Gyrfalcon on this one.
 
xcv
2013-08-06 03:45:13 AM  

Speaker2Animals: I wish some asshole who owns one of these things would come on here and explain the f*cking point of having a pet snake.


I was fascinated with learning facts about reptiles, I never got to own a snake but I did get to feed some in a pet store and it was awesome,  I was also 6 years old.
 
2013-08-06 03:51:14 AM  

Gyrfalcon: I call major shenanigans.

While it's just barely possible that an 18' adult python MIGHT kill a child, in the wild, if it was hunting; there is no conceivable reason a pet-store python would kill TWO boys, mostly because any kid could escape from a snake, especially if it was already coiled around another kid. Snakes aren't movie monsters--it's not going to kill one, leave the body, then go somewhere else to find a new victim. A hungry snake would try to kill one child as prey, then try to eat him. And then why didn't the other boy flee?

The boys died or were killed in some other way, and tearful mom is pretending it was a snake. We'll find that they died by CO poisoning or somesuch.


Yeah, this.  Or worse.
 
2013-08-06 03:52:31 AM  

Gyrfalcon: I call major shenanigans.

While it's just barely possible that an 18' adult python MIGHT kill a child, in the wild, if it was hunting; there is no conceivable reason a pet-store python would kill TWO boys, mostly because any kid could escape from a snake, especially if it was already coiled around another kid. Snakes aren't movie monsters--it's not going to kill one, leave the body, then go somewhere else to find a new victim. A hungry snake would try to kill one child as prey, then try to eat him. And then why didn't the other boy flee?

The boys died or were killed in some other way, and tearful mom is pretending it was a snake. We'll find that they died by CO poisoning or somesuch.


You sound like one of those cat owners that pretends their precious little baby isn't butchering truckloads of squirrels every day while they're not looking.

/cats will hunt and kill even when they aren't hungry at all
//in fact keeping a cat well fed gives them enough energy to engage in more hunting than they would if they had to survive off their kills
///no reason to believe snakes are that much different, except "I WANT TO BELIEVE" syndrome of course
 
2013-08-06 03:52:41 AM  

oohpah: borg: Gyrfalcon: I call major shenanigans.

While it's just barely possible that an 18' adult python MIGHT kill a child, in the wild, if it was hunting; there is no conceivable reason a pet-store python would kill TWO boys, mostly because any kid could escape from a snake, especially if it was already coiled around another kid. Snakes aren't movie monsters--it's not going to kill one, leave the body, then go somewhere else to find a new victim. A hungry snake would try to kill one child as prey, then try to eat him. And then why didn't the other boy flee?

The boys died or were killed in some other way, and tearful mom is pretending it was a snake. We'll find that they died by CO poisoning or somesuch.

Umm,  or you high or just stupid?

Sorry, I'm with Gyrfalcon on this one.


resources1.news.com.au


Some people just don't like snakes.
 
2013-08-06 03:53:57 AM  
i.qkme.me
 
2013-08-06 03:55:21 AM  
I'll never understand the concept of pet snakes or spiders or any deadly animal that can't truly be domesticated. Are cats and dogs not hardcore enough for some people?
 
2013-08-06 04:03:30 AM  
Were they nephews of David Carridine?
 
2013-08-06 04:05:09 AM  

Gyrfalcon: I call major shenanigans.

While it's just barely possible that an 18' adult python MIGHT kill a child, in the wild, if it was hunting; there is no conceivable reason a pet-store python would kill TWO boys, mostly because any kid could escape from a snake, especially if it was already coiled around another kid. Snakes aren't movie monsters--it's not going to kill one, leave the body, then go somewhere else to find a new victim. A hungry snake would try to kill one child as prey, then try to eat him. And then why didn't the other boy flee?


What happens when the snake cant swallow the first kill? What makes you think the kids ever woke up?
 
2013-08-06 04:06:03 AM  
The weird thing about this is that the snake only ate two kids. Normally in this situation the snake eats at least six to eight kids minimum. Something's up here.
 
2013-08-06 04:07:24 AM  
Trust in me......

just in me........
 
2013-08-06 04:09:14 AM  
Python?

They're not dead, they're resting.
 
2013-08-06 04:13:39 AM  
Snake in a Trane?

i90.photobucket.com

/does seem to be a bit fishy
 
2013-08-06 04:14:36 AM  
I find the ventilator story fishy. But yet the police authorities have the snake in question in custody. I just do not want to believe this double tragedy. Obviously the second victim tried to free the first victim rather than flee
 
2013-08-06 04:17:05 AM  

Alonjar: What happens when the snake cant swallow the first kill?


They can always swallow the first kill.

Pythons are constrictors. They don't just strangle prey, they pulverize it into a ball.
 
2013-08-06 04:17:29 AM  
I'd've thought "boys at slumber party strangled by python" would be a euphemism for something, but apparently it's not.

Nonetheless, I am skeptical, too, for a few reasons:

- - - What boys ever sleep at a slumber party? They should have been awake to see this alleged attacking snake.
- - - Don't ventilation systems have, you know, VENTS? What did this super-snake do, push out the grille covering the vent hole?
- - - Two boys dead from one snake? What did the second boy do, lie there and dare the python to attack him, too?
- - - What was the snake's motive to kill two humans? Don't reptiles (except for alligators on golf courses) just want to be left alone??
 
2013-08-06 04:17:59 AM  
So the snake just murdered the kids, and didn't eat them?
 
2013-08-06 04:19:18 AM  

Tatterdemalian: /cats will hunt and kill even when they aren't hungry at all


Feral cats are totally different than reptiles.

Cats DO kill for sport and they're crazy active.

Reptiles eat once a week, tops. When they're not hunting they're either hanging around or sedintarily digesting a meal.

Totes different.
 
2013-08-06 04:20:24 AM  
 
2013-08-06 04:23:43 AM  
About 10 years ago my girlfriend returned home to find a boa constrictor under a chair in her bedroom.

In England.

In a second floor apartment.

And nobody in her building owned one.

So I am really getting a kick....
 
2013-08-06 04:25:38 AM  
FTA: The snake was caught, and "Canadian broadcaster CBC reported the python is between 11 and nearly 15 feet long and weighs more than 99 pounds."

"Between 11 and nearly 15 feet"? That doesn't make any damn sense. For one thing, "between this much and nearly that much" just sounds silly. Why not just say "between 11 and 15 feet"? For another, they should know exactly how long it is.

I had a boa constrictor in college, which doesn't make me an expert on anything, but I know a little. Yes, constrictors, including pythons, might instinctively grab and hold their prey (with their mouths), then wrap 'n' squeeze, even if they're not hungry.

They will do it if they're startled or if they feel threatened, for just two examples. The python might have gone after one kid, then the other one yelled or something, and ... it's horrible to think about, but IMO, not at all unlikely. They'll be able to tell by the post-mortem examination.
 
2013-08-06 04:26:39 AM  

Gyrfalcon: I call major shenanigans.

While it's just barely possible that an 18' adult python MIGHT kill a child, in the wild, if it was hunting; there is no conceivable reason a pet-store python would kill TWO boys, mostly because any kid could escape from a snake, especially if it was already coiled around another kid. Snakes aren't movie monsters--it's not going to kill one, leave the body, then go somewhere else to find a new victim. A hungry snake would try to kill one child as prey, then try to eat him. And then why didn't the other boy flee?

The boys died or were killed in some other way, and tearful mom is pretending it was a snake. We'll find that they died by CO poisoning or somesuch.


I heard this story first from my aged mother, so I had my suspicions. Seeing on fark later increases my bullshiat detector. It's a shame that the snakes didn't slap the kid in a Wal-mart for having a pink bandana on, so I KNOW it's complete bullshiat.
 
2013-08-06 04:32:46 AM  

MadAzza: FTA: The snake was caught, and "Canadian broadcaster CBC reported the python is between 11 and nearly 15 feet long and weighs more than 99 pounds."

"Between 11 and nearly 15 feet"? That doesn't make any damn sense. For one thing, "between this much and nearly that much" just sounds silly. Why not just say "between 11 and 15 feet"? For another, they should know exactly how long it is.

I had a boa constrictor in college, which doesn't make me an expert on anything, but I know a little. Yes, constrictors, including pythons, might instinctively grab and hold their prey (with their mouths), then wrap 'n' squeeze, even if they're not hungry.

They will do it if they're startled or if they feel threatened, for just two examples. The python might have gone after one kid, then the other one yelled or something, and ... it's horrible to think about, but IMO, not at all unlikely. They'll be able to tell by the post-mortem examination.


Too bad you said you're not an expert, because there are a lot of "experts" here that will now put you on ignore for that admission.

/FARK: proving grounds for the Dunning-Kruger effect since it took down the squirrel pic
//looks like "python killed my kids" is going to be the new "dingoes ate my baby"
 
2013-08-06 04:35:45 AM  

Tatterdemalian: MadAzza: FTA: The snake was caught, and "Canadian broadcaster CBC reported the python is between 11 and nearly 15 feet long and weighs more than 99 pounds."

"Between 11 and nearly 15 feet"? That doesn't make any damn sense. For one thing, "between this much and nearly that much" just sounds silly. Why not just say "between 11 and 15 feet"? For another, they should know exactly how long it is.

I had a boa constrictor in college, which doesn't make me an expert on anything, but I know a little. Yes, constrictors, including pythons, might instinctively grab and hold their prey (with their mouths), then wrap 'n' squeeze, even if they're not hungry.

They will do it if they're startled or if they feel threatened, for just two examples. The python might have gone after one kid, then the other one yelled or something, and ... it's horrible to think about, but IMO, not at all unlikely. They'll be able to tell by the post-mortem examination.

Too bad you said you're not an expert, because there are a lot of "experts" here that will now put you on ignore for that admission.

/FARK: proving grounds for the Dunning-Kruger effect since it took down the squirrel pic
//looks like "python killed my kids" is going to be the new "dingoes ate my baby"


So nobody is going to buy it and the mother is going to get arrested, but she'll be released when evidence surfaces that the snake did, in fact, kill her kids?
 
2013-08-06 04:44:54 AM  
Ye gods two dead children and all you lot can do is natter about snake behavior.
 
2013-08-06 04:45:04 AM  
Heracles, they were not.
It didn't pan out this time.
Better luck next time...
That's why responsible parents who hope for mythologically heroic offspring should ALWAYS live above "urban zoos" full of strangly snakes.
 
2013-08-06 04:45:23 AM  
Never should've upgraded from 2.6
 
2013-08-06 04:46:27 AM  
If anyone saw Roger Moore's followup to Roger and Me called Pets or Meat there is a snake attack on a pet store rabbit which is killed and eaten by a snake of this size but it was a long and violent process so unless one boy went to help the other and was also wrapped up I too doubt the story.
 
2013-08-06 04:50:23 AM  

doglover: Alonjar: What happens when the snake cant swallow the first kill?

They can always swallow the first kill.

Pythons are constrictors. They don't just strangle prey, they pulverize it into a ball.


Not from what I've ever seen or read. As the prey is compelled to try to breathe with the python wrapped around it, the python squeezes a little bit more with each tiny exhale as the prey weakens as it struggles. Over and over, tighter and tighter it squeezes, until the victim can't inhale at all. The snake unwraps from its victim and starts chowing down. Usually.
 
2013-08-06 04:51:10 AM  
wakey wakey, hands off snakey.
 
2013-08-06 04:55:47 AM  

i1318.photobucket.com


"The name's Plissken."
 
2013-08-06 04:56:17 AM  

borg: Gyrfalcon: I call major shenanigans.

While it's just barely possible that an 18' adult python MIGHT kill a child, in the wild, if it was hunting; there is no conceivable reason a pet-store python would kill TWO boys, mostly because any kid could escape from a snake, especially if it was already coiled around another kid. Snakes aren't movie monsters--it's not going to kill one, leave the body, then go somewhere else to find a new victim. A hungry snake would try to kill one child as prey, then try to eat him. And then why didn't the other boy flee?

The boys died or were killed in some other way, and tearful mom is pretending it was a snake. We'll find that they died by CO poisoning or somesuch.

Umm,  or you high or just stupid?


Which one is your excuse?
 
2013-08-06 04:58:17 AM  
Snakes will attack if you smell like food, but since food is probably thawed rodents that might not be the case. The truth is that snakes are dangerous, and when you work with an animal that big you need a spotter or spare handler if you are going to pick it up, just ask Alice Cooper. These kids were probably the warmest thing in the room and heat is one way to attract snakes. I can't claim to know what really happened, and it's not like they are going to release photos of bodies on the scene or bite mark locations.
 
2013-08-06 04:58:35 AM  
Interesting/terrifying read that makes me think the story has every reason to be considered legitimate:

http://www.anapsid.org/coloburm.html

I hate snakes. Hate them. We wouldn't have these huge snakes in the US if it weren't for these pet owners. They're now living wild in the Everglades because of pet owners.
 
2013-08-06 05:02:11 AM  
Also, I doubt the boys were "strangled." They almost certainly were suffocated, as that is how constrictors kill.
 
2013-08-06 05:03:32 AM  

vincentfox: Ye gods two dead children and all you lot can do is natter about snake behavior.


Welcome to the spin room. Or is it a spin and snark room? Either way, we missed our sensitivity training.
 
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