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(Hartford Courant)   You would think by now everyone knows that joking to a TSA agent at the aiport about having a bomb in your pocket never ends well   (courant.com) divider line 52
    More: Dumbass, TSA, N.C., special agents, Hartford Courant, David Owens, pockets, home runs, Bradley International Airport  
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3925 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Aug 2013 at 11:23 PM (36 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



52 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-08-05 09:27:37 PM
Only because you're all paranoid idiots that think the boogie man is going to get ya at every turn.

Flew for decades without problems. Hate flying now. Hate it. Only will do it if I have to. You're all nuts to let that happen and go on.
 
2013-08-05 11:24:01 PM
The biggest mistake was to assume that a TSA screener has a sense of humor in the first place.
 
2013-08-05 11:27:19 PM
No, you wouldn't. Because people still have this thing called a sense of humor, and judging from TFA, the man was white, so just another nice choice of white privilege.

He'll still spend a little more time but he won't be that much worse for wear, considering he'll be housed with low-level scumbags like scammers, landlords, and such.
 
2013-08-05 11:27:28 PM
The proper answer would have been "No, I'm just happy to see you."
 
Rat
2013-08-05 11:29:29 PM
I think the first clue is that people with bombs usually don't advertise that they in fact have bombs.  That's the whole point, right?

© TSA is just one level up from school crossing guard
 
2013-08-05 11:30:31 PM

Rat: I think the first clue is that people with bombs usually don't advertise that they in fact have bombs.  That's the whole point, right?

© TSA is just one level up from school crossing guard



Yeah. It would be counter-productive for a would-be terrorist to declare his weapons of mass destruction at the gate.
 
2013-08-05 11:30:44 PM
www.iconsoffright.com
 
2013-08-05 11:34:10 PM
I've got a pipe bomb in my pants.
 
2013-08-05 11:34:14 PM
His joke was a bomb so apparently he knew what he was talking about.
 
2013-08-05 11:40:43 PM
Come one now, terrorism is still on the mind of the public. Would you make a holocaust joke in Israel? No.

Now shut up.
 
2013-08-05 11:41:50 PM
There's a bomb in my bag.

images.moviepostershop.com
 
2013-08-05 11:42:51 PM
i like the 'expert commenter' guy in the comments
who says the TSA has gone too far...

like they haven't been prosecuting people for bomb 'jokes' for the past 50 years.

/wotta clueless dumbass
 
2013-08-05 11:50:06 PM

jtown: There's a bomb in my bag.

[images.moviepostershop.com image 270x366]


Nice.
 
2013-08-05 11:50:25 PM
I don't just have a bomb ... I am da bomb ... sukkaz !

4photos.net
 
2013-08-05 11:50:39 PM
One of these days some terrorist is going to joke about having a bomb in their pocket and it will turn out to be a real bomb.
The TSA is here to save us from that.

/and that's why we listen to your voicemail.
 
2013-08-05 11:55:25 PM

davynelson: like they haven't been prosecuting people for bomb 'jokes' for the past 50 years.


Yeah - it's never been okay to joke about bombs or hijacking at airports - well, at least not for as long as I can remember.
 
2013-08-06 12:00:09 AM
"Do you have anything in your pockets?"

The best 23 seconds of your life waiting to party.
 
2013-08-06 12:01:11 AM
Jordan Rickard, 26, of Charlotte, N.C., was asked if he had anything in his pockets and he responded, "Yes, I have a bomb," state police said. TSA agents contacted troopers, who have a barracks at the airport, who then took Rickard into custody. His fiancé was also taken for questioning, but has not been charged.

Do you think his fiance is still going to be there when he gets out of jail? Pretty sure my fiancee would kill me if I ruined our vacation by getting arrested before we even made it to the destination.  I guess he can always fall back on the age-old excuse that the TSA is prejudiced against homosexuals and get a nice settlement in a lawsuit.
 
2013-08-06 12:04:11 AM
Since when is saying "I have a bomb." during a screening considered a joke?
 
2013-08-06 12:05:30 AM
He should of said he had a rocket in his pocket!
 
2013-08-06 12:06:38 AM

Nezray: Since when is saying "I have a bomb." during a screening considered a joke?


ever since the TSA was created...
 
2013-08-06 12:11:31 AM

Mangoose: Only because you're all paranoid idiots that think the boogie man is going to get ya at every turn.

Flew for decades without problems. Hate flying now. Hate it. Only will do it if I have to. You're all nuts to let that happen and go on.


And what did you do to prevent it from happening?  Hmmm?
 
2013-08-06 12:14:16 AM

bullsballs: Nezray: Since when is saying "I have a bomb." during a screening considered a joke?

ever since the TSA was created...


TSA are the joke. This future inmate is just a heckler.

I wonder if he'll use the "I voted for the current state GOP legislature and I don't know any better" defense.
 
2013-08-06 12:14:45 AM

bullsballs: ever since the TSA was created...



So if you were pulled over by a cop would you say "There's a dead hooker in my trunk." and expect the cop to not search your car?  I don't think this has much to do with the TSA.
 
2013-08-06 12:15:08 AM
Ha-ha-ha! Bomb! Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha! Oh man, (gasp) ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha--ha. Jesus Christ - BOMB! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Oh, man, where do these guys come up with this stuff? +1!!!


/hee-heee-hee-hee, bomb...BOMB! I never would have come up with that one. TSA comment of the year winner!
 
2013-08-06 12:17:55 AM
If you ever want to mess with the screeners then just put a chunk of a meteorite in you bag.  I have a 20-sided gaming die that is carved out of a chunk of meteorite and one time I was flying and forgot that it was in my carry on bag.  They halted the bag in the scanner and at one point 5 people were crowded around.  I was pulled aside while they searched through my bag until they found my dice bag with the d20 in it.  They pulled it out and examined it and asked me what it was, what it was made of, etc.  They then ran it back through the x-ray machine.  I was finally give it back and sent on my way.  It was hilarious that they put this tiny die in a bin all by itself and sent it through all by itself.  I have no idea what that die is made of, but the x-ray machine sure did not like it.
 
2013-08-06 12:18:51 AM
Yeah, well...I am sure those jokes are as about as funny to the TSA agent as the same old stale comments on Fark like "If he had of been armed..." or "and not one fark given that day".
 
2013-08-06 12:24:26 AM

99.998er: Yeah, well...I am sure those jokes are as about as funny to the TSA agent as the same old stale comments on Fark like "If he had of been armed..." or "and not one fark given that day".


Well sure, not when you say it like that. It's all in the delivery.  Some guys have it; some guys don't. But you'll never know if you're gonna make it in this business until you try out the material at the airport. I mean, the first time Paul Reiser tried out that airline peanuts joke, he did three years hard time in a federal prison. But it was worth it. 'Cause, really, WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH THOSE THINGS?
 
2013-08-06 12:40:13 AM
He actually said, "I have a balm" but the stupid TSA screener doesn't know what that is.

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-08-06 12:43:55 AM
I saw that happen at the Philadelphia Navy Yard in the 1987-88 time frame.  To enter and exit the yard, we had to pass thru a security gate and one idiot wise-ass sailor, awhile he and his AWOL bag was being searched, joked with the searcher that he had a bomb in his bag.  Bad move as he was immediately grabbed and thrown up against the wire mesh and searched thoroughly.  He was taken into custody and went to Captain's Mast (non-judicial punishment by the commanding officer).  Note that this was way before the terrorists singled out the U.S. in bin Laden's war and the 9-11 attacks by the Muslims, although after the terrorists were hi-jacking airliners, etc. at this time. We all knew that the gate guards had no sense of humor regarding security and didn't goof with them as the results would not make us happy.  This young sailor had to learn the hard way.
 
2013-08-06 12:56:02 AM
"Do I have anything in my pockets? No, though in my carry on there is a pressure cooker."
 
2013-08-06 01:00:16 AM

Rat: I think the first clue is that people with bombs usually don't advertise that they in fact have bombs.  That's the whole point, right?

© TSA is just one level up from school crossing guard


Anytime you take a specific aspect of a flyer and want it off-limits it will be used as cover.

While I think TSA is security theater, it would be completely worthless even in theory if every type of flyer farkers think should be predetermined as safe were given a pass. Yes that includes children, the elderly, hot chicks, and those who pretend to have a bomb.

This whole situation is stupid; from the terrorism our country fosters overseas, to the overreactions to terror, to the equally retarded "hurr hurr all those guys taking a tsa jobs are filthy pigs undesrving of even the slightest respect derp" that is spammed around here.

The last cracks me up the most, since those comments come from the same people who support veterans (who get hiring preference for tsa and other gov jobs) to those who the rest of the time defend the uneducated as deserving of a job and a chance.

And I'm probably stupid too, for thinking I'll get anyone to step back and think for a moment instead of derping.
 
2013-08-06 01:00:17 AM

bullsballs: Nezray: Since when is saying "I have a bomb." during a screening considered a joke?

ever since the TSA was created...


Aw gosh, you kids are just adorable, thinking that terrorism and hijacking were invented by al-Qaeda...

/was told "don't make bomb or hijacking jokes at the airport" before my first plane trip in the 70s
 
2013-08-06 01:01:58 AM
As is always pointed out in these threads, it has never been ok to joke about bombs at gate security. This was true long before the TSA.

The old saw about turrists never actually saying they have bombs is silly. Someone who is attempting to carry a bomb onto an airplane is a stark raving lunatic. Attributing logic to them does not fly (ha ha).
 
2013-08-06 01:02:25 AM

gfid: davynelson: like they haven't been prosecuting people for bomb 'jokes' for the past 50 years.

Yeah - it's never been okay to joke about bombs or hijacking at airports - well, at least not for as long as I can remember.


Since at least 1970, which is when I first remember getting on a plane.

And there weren't even metal detectors in the airport then.
 
2013-08-06 01:03:12 AM

Smackledorfer: And I'm probably stupid too, for thinking I'll get anyone to step back and think for a moment instead of derping.


Perhaps if you tried leading by example.
 
2013-08-06 01:05:23 AM
I brought a watermelon from Florida to Ohio on a jet in about 1968 and they x-rayed it.  I was about 12.  I didn't know we got perfectly good watermelons here.
 
2013-08-06 01:09:39 AM

Shaggy_C: Jordan Rickard, 26, of Charlotte, N.C., was asked if he had anything in his pockets and he responded, "Yes, I have a bomb," state police said. TSA agents contacted troopers, who have a barracks at the airport, who then took Rickard into custody. His fiancé was also taken for questioning, but has not been charged.

Do you think his fiance is still going to be there when he gets out of jail? Pretty sure my fiancee would kill me if I ruined our vacation by getting arrested before we even made it to the destination.  I guess he can always fall back on the age-old excuse that the TSA is prejudiced against homosexuals and get a nice settlement in a lawsuit.


It might seem drastic but I'm thinking that was his endgame, getting the fark away from his fiance
 
2013-08-06 01:17:28 AM

Smackledorfer: Rat: I think the first clue is that people with bombs usually don't advertise that they in fact have bombs.  That's the whole point, right?

© TSA is just one level up from school crossing guard

Anytime you take a specific aspect of a flyer and want it off-limits it will be used as cover.

While I think TSA is security theater, it would be completely worthless even in theory if every type of flyer farkers think should be predetermined as safe were given a pass. Yes that includes children, the elderly, hot chicks, and those who pretend to have a bomb.

This whole situation is stupid; from the terrorism our country fosters overseas, to the overreactions to terror, to the equally retarded "hurr hurr all those guys taking a tsa jobs are filthy pigs undesrving of even the slightest respect derp" that is spammed around here.

The last cracks me up the most, since those comments come from the same people who support veterans (who get hiring preference for tsa and other gov jobs) to those who the rest of the time defend the uneducated as deserving of a job and a chance.

And I'm probably stupid too, for thinking I'll get anyone to step back and think for a moment instead of derping.


You're only stupid for thinking the ones who most need to step back and think are actually going to do it. Plenty of us already step back and think, but then again we aren't the ones herping the derp for the most part. And the ones who are, aren't going to be reading this far into your post anyway. They're too busy seeing your handle and already typing WHARGARBLE!! HERP!!! DERP!!! BOK BOK BOK!! But at least you tried.
 
2013-08-06 01:28:20 AM

untaken_name: He actually said, "I have a balm" but the stupid TSA screener doesn't know what that is.

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 300x300]


It's a dangerous animal.  Quick, throw it in the trough before it bites!
 
2013-08-06 01:32:57 AM
TSA, much like Las Vegas, rests on a bedrock of horrible math.
 
2013-08-06 01:49:15 AM
What if I shouted "I HAVE A QUR'AN AND I KNOW HOW TO USE IT!!!" ?
 
2013-08-06 02:09:30 AM

Gyrfalcon: Smackledorfer: Rat: I think the first clue is that people with bombs usually don't advertise that they in fact have bombs.  That's the whole point, right?

© TSA is just one level up from school crossing guard

Anytime you take a specific aspect of a flyer and want it off-limits it will be used as cover.

While I think TSA is security theater, it would be completely worthless even in theory if every type of flyer farkers think should be predetermined as safe were given a pass. Yes that includes children, the elderly, hot chicks, and those who pretend to have a bomb.

This whole situation is stupid; from the terrorism our country fosters overseas, to the overreactions to terror, to the equally retarded "hurr hurr all those guys taking a tsa jobs are filthy pigs undesrving of even the slightest respect derp" that is spammed around here.

The last cracks me up the most, since those comments come from the same people who support veterans (who get hiring preference for tsa and other gov jobs) to those who the rest of the time defend the uneducated as deserving of a job and a chance.

And I'm probably stupid too, for thinking I'll get anyone to step back and think for a moment instead of derping.

You're only stupid for thinking the ones who most need to step back and think are actually going to do it. Plenty of us already step back and think, but then again we aren't the ones herping the derp for the most part. And the ones who are, aren't going to be reading this far into your post anyway. They're too busy seeing your handle and already typing WHARGARBLE!! HERP!!! DERP!!! BOK BOK BOK!! But at least you tried.


Cawkacaw cawkakacaw!

The bokbokbok got me thinking about gob :)

But you are correct.
 
2013-08-06 02:09:54 AM
Would be a fun flashmob idea. Have 30-40 people say that in succession when going through screening.
 
2013-08-06 02:27:47 AM
A bo--- *look of shock*
 
2013-08-06 02:55:45 AM
s.mcstatic.com

I said SHE was the bomb!

She was the bomb?
 
2013-08-06 03:05:57 AM

tkirby: Would be a fun flashmob idea. Have 30-40 people say that in succession when going through screening.


I would laugh.

Both at the tsa, and at all of the mob getting some form of obstruction ticket :)
 
2013-08-06 04:32:48 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-08-06 06:44:59 AM
There are children in this thread who apparently have never been through an airport.
 
2013-08-06 08:07:53 AM
26.media.tumblr.com

"No, I said I have a Sex Bob-omb"
 
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