Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(USA Today)   Sex ed? Nah. Here in Mississippi we'd rather have the State take a sample of blood from the umbilical cord to make sure that the sluts are only slutting with those whom they can legally slut with. That'll lower the teen pregnancy rate for sure   (usatoday.com ) divider line
    More: Dumbass, cord blood, Mississippi, teen pregnancy, medical privacy, pregnancy rate, birth controls, National Conference of State Legislatures, statutory rape  
•       •       •

3908 clicks; posted to Politics » on 02 Aug 2013 at 1:34 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



85 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2013-08-02 11:30:54 AM  
wtfamIreading.jpg submitter.
 
2013-08-02 11:34:32 AM  
Unless the girl voluntarily gives up the name, this is entirely f*cking pointless and unenforceable except for the part where someone has to pay a grand for a sample that won't be worth the vial it's sitting in.
 
2013-08-02 11:37:53 AM  
Does Mississippi really want to know how inbred their population is? The paternity tests are bound to show that there are lots of uncle-cousin-granddad-fathers.
 
2013-08-02 11:49:59 AM  

swaniefrmreddeer: Does Mississippi really want to know how inbred their population is? The paternity tests are bound to show that there are lots of uncle-cousin-granddad-fathers.


You know, you joke about that, but I usually see two or so children a year that are the result of incest in either Mississippi or Missouri. Dad of the girl is also Dad of the baby kinda things.
 
2013-08-02 12:38:05 PM  
State enforced slut shaming? Prithee Hester thou art a harlot
 
2013-08-02 12:40:11 PM  
I have to say, I like the use of 'slut' as a verb in the headline.
 
2013-08-02 01:27:23 PM  
That's fine. I wasn't using the fourth amendment, anyway.
 
2013-08-02 01:35:42 PM  
fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net
 
2013-08-02 01:40:01 PM  
"It is to stop children from being raped," said Bryant

So after the girl has given birth, you're going to stop the rape with a DNA test?

There's something in the water down there, I swear.
 
2013-08-02 01:41:31 PM  

Marcus Aurelius: "It is to stop children from being raped," said Bryant

So after the girl has given birth, you're going to stop the rape with a DNA test?

There's something in the water down there, I swear.


Well if you shame them into getting married it's not rape, it's a-courtin'
 
2013-08-02 01:41:38 PM  
FTA:  "It is to stop children from being raped," said Bryant, who started his career as a deputy sheriff in the 1970s. "One of the things that go on in this state that's always haunted me when I was a law-enforcement officer is seeing the 14- and 15-year-old girl that is raped by the neighbor next door and down the street."

Wait a minute, pregnancy from rape?  Didn't they tell us that kind of thing was impossible?  Or does a woman's ability to "shut that whole thing down" not come until later in life, like magically when they turn 18?
 
2013-08-02 01:43:04 PM  
Sounds like a great use of funds in a state so broke it'd have to fart to get a scent in its pocket. Brilliant conservative thinking again to end young pregnancies. Why waste that money on education, it's Mississippi. They have an above average tolerance of an uneducated populus in every other way. Why not sex ed as well.

yeah...I know the fart joke is better heard than seen.
 
2013-08-02 01:44:50 PM  

DarwiOdrade: [fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net image 501x418]


The drug abuse one should be more like "Threaten with felony convictions" though that's obviously not just a conservative position.
 
2013-08-02 01:47:14 PM  
If a girl younger than 16 gives birth and won't name the father, a new Mississippi law - likely the first of its kind in the country - says authorities must collect umbilical cord blood and run DNA tests to prove paternity as a step toward prosecuting statutory rape cases.

To prove paternity? Wouldn't the girl need to name the father and the father consent (or be coerced under the law) to provide a sample to compare the DNA? Unless Mississippi is simply banking on the fact people who father children with a girl younger than sixteen have previous records and are therefore in the database.

The bill's main sponsor, Republican state Rep. Andy Gipson, said the U.S. Supreme Court has ruled that DNA left on objects, such as saliva on a disposable cup, can be tested as evidence in a criminal case. He said he thinks umbilical cord blood fits that description.

Except being under sixteen years of age is not itself enough to bring about statutory rape charges in Mississippi but requires, for a girl between sixteen and fourteen, the guy to be three years or older than the girl or two years or older than the girl, for a girl under fourteen. Also, think there are a myriad of laws on privacy of genetic data and tissues which is why laws exist for the limited situations in which law enforcement may take samples from an individual; following around some guy for him to discard a soda can to get a swab would not be legal, but a soda can at the scene would be. Lawyers, correct me on this since my understanding is basically from television...
 
2013-08-02 01:47:26 PM  

TuteTibiImperes: Marcus Aurelius: "It is to stop children from being raped," said Bryant

So after the girl has given birth, you're going to stop the rape with a DNA test?

There's something in the water down there, I swear.

Well if you shame them into getting married it's not rape, it's a-courtin'


Sadly, that's probably the most Biblically accurate thing these moralistic farktards have done.
 
2013-08-02 01:50:18 PM  

Aarontology: Unless the girl voluntarily gives up the name, this is entirely f*cking pointless and unenforceable except for the part where someone has to pay a grand for a sample that won't be worth the vial it's sitting in.


I wonder which state congressman has a vested interest in the company that would supply the tests?
 
2013-08-02 01:50:34 PM  
There wouldn't be a need for this bizarre attempt to "chip away" at statutory rape if these conservatards would stop trying to stop abortions.  There's only one abortion clinic in MS, and it's constantly under threat of being shut down. The "personhood" amendment bullsh*t was narrowly defeated a couple of years ago, and now the state wants to revoke the doctors' ER admitting "privileges" in an attempt to declassify them as a medical facility.

Yes, I'd like to see an end to statutory (and all other) rape. I'd like to see these girls come forward and report their attackers. And I'd like for them to have access to a safe, clean facility where they can terminate the unwanted pregnancy.  But, by limiting these options, the state has concocted a stupid (at best ... horrifying at worst) "solution" that, like every attempt to control people's behavior, won't do a damn thing it's intended to, but cause massive collateral damage.

There are a lot of things I love about MS, but these "pro-life" wingnuts need to be stopped.
 
2013-08-02 01:54:57 PM  
So what happens when all their dads, uncles and step-fathers are in jail?
 
2013-08-02 01:55:39 PM  
Are the conservatives trying to control women under the guise of "We're tough on rape!"? This is so anti-woman, it is sickening.
 
2013-08-02 01:55:55 PM  
A task force put together to figure out how to reduce the number of teen preganancies... came up with THIS?!?!

(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

Free condoms and birth control pills, proper instruction on how to use them as well as basic biology sex-ed class, and access to counsellors who will answer their questions and concerns compassionately and without judgement or shaming. Teach them that yes, the only 100% way to not get pregnant is to not have sex, but if/when you DO, here's how to say safe. Kids are going to have sex- accept it, and just make sure they're doing it safely and not getting all kinds of diseases and getting pregnant by the schoolbus-full...
 
2013-08-02 02:00:49 PM  
Regulation of gun ownership: STOP INVADING MY PRIVACY

Regulation of sex: We will continue to invade your privacy and you will like it.

wut?
 
2013-08-02 02:02:35 PM  
A group of men got together and this is what they came up with. This was the best they could do, and it's all because they pretend to care about what's in a bronze age story book.
 
2013-08-02 02:06:43 PM  

Lernaeus: There wouldn't be a need for this bizarre attempt to "chip away" at statutory rape if these conservatards would stop trying to stop abortions.  There's only one abortion clinic in MS, and it's constantly under threat of being shut down. The "personhood" amendment bullsh*t was narrowly defeated a couple of years ago, and now the state wants to revoke the doctors' ER admitting "privileges" in an attempt to declassify them as a medical facility.

Yes, I'd like to see an end to statutory (and all other) rape. I'd like to see these girls come forward and report their attackers. And I'd like for them to have access to a safe, clean facility where they can terminate the unwanted pregnancy.  But, by limiting these options, the state has concocted a stupid (at best ... horrifying at worst) "solution" that, like every attempt to control people's behavior, won't do a damn thing it's intended to, but cause massive collateral damage.

There are a lot of things I love about MS, but these "pro-life" wingnuts need to be stopped.


You forget, if we figure out more ways to stick ppl in prison we can make more money for the prison owners and the companies that use the nearly free slave labor.
 
2013-08-02 02:10:22 PM  
So...   In twenty years they will have a DNA database for 50% of the population of Mississippi?

Just so long as it isn't also have a gun-owner database, that should be no problem.
 
2013-08-02 02:12:38 PM  

rudemix: Sounds like a great use of funds in a state so broke it'd have to fart to get a scent in its pocket. Brilliant conservative thinking again to end young pregnancies. Why waste that money on education, it's Mississippi. They have an above average tolerance of an uneducated populus in every other way. Why not sex ed as well.

yeah...I know the fart joke is better heard than seen.


The guy who says "populus" when he means "populace" is calling other people uneducated. Lawl.
 
2013-08-02 02:13:06 PM  

Marcus Aurelius: "It is to stop children from being raped," said Bryant

So after the girl has given birth, you're going to stop the rape with a DNA test?

There's something in the water down there, I swear.


It's textbook Right Wing Authoritarianism.  High conventionalism + low empathy = "Who gives a fark about the victim, as long as you get to punish the transgression after the fact?"
 
2013-08-02 02:13:07 PM  
Ah yes, just another coverup for collecting the DNA of people who are at high risk of committing crimes at some point in the future.

/Go after the babies and fill up the DNA criminal database fast and quiet, without beating the blood out of some teenage kid later.
 
2013-08-02 02:14:26 PM  

HotWingConspiracy: A group of men got together and this is what they came up with. This was the best they could do, and it's all because they pretend to care about what's in a bronze age story book.


I've got some bad news for you:
This kind of thing ain't in the story book either.

If a woman is raped, her rapist's punishment is that he has to care for her for the rest of her life - THAT's in the book. Compelling her to reveal anything is most definitely not, and you'd need two witnesses to put him at the scene of the crime.

// wait, did I say "bad news? I meant "not surprising" news
// also, since this is America, we write laws based on things other than a badly-translated version of a millenia-old book
// we have our own old pieces of parchment with legalistic vagueries to base law on, thankyouverymuch
 
2013-08-02 02:15:11 PM  
At one point in American history, did doctors routinely drop babies on their heads as they came out? That's really the only reason I can see for so many retarded politicians and voters.
 
2013-08-02 02:15:54 PM  
So....if she's not telling you who the father is...what is the cord blood going to get you? Are you going to get blood samples from every boy in her school? Are you going to send in an undercover cop to find out from "the kids" who she might have slept with? Are you going to go door to farking door demanding DNA from every farking male in the house between the ages of 12-92, JUST TO BE FARKING CERTAIN YOU IGNORANT FARKING CHUCKLENUTS???
 
2013-08-02 02:16:26 PM  
Soooo..... they're going to take cord blood after a birth has already occurred to stop rapes? And they're going to use it to identify people who can't be found until they're named anyway in cases where the mother won't name the father?

That's so retarded they better watch out that Texas doesn't try to sneak across Louisiana and execute them.
 
2013-08-02 02:16:49 PM  

Frozboz: FTA:  "It is to stop children from being raped," said Bryant, who started his career as a deputy sheriff in the 1970s. "One of the things that go on in this state that's always haunted me when I was a law-enforcement officer is seeing the 14- and 15-year-old girl that is raped by the neighbor next door and down the street."

Wait a minute, pregnancy from rape?  Didn't they tell us that kind of thing was impossible?  Or does a woman's ability to "shut that whole thing down" not come until later in life, like magically when they turn 18?


Well they SHOULD say Statutory "Rape" instead of Rape.  Because if a 17 year old has sex with another 17 year old that isn't rape but if she has sex with an 18 year old she was raped.  To many people, that last statement is taken seriously despite being completely illogical and without factual basis/evidence.

Yeah I don't actually like the term statutory rape.  Even while maintaining some sort of law about having sex with females below a certain age. I think it should be referred to otherwise.  I think that term itself demeans the meaning and seriousness of actual rape.  "Statutory rape" may reflect someone taking advantage of the bad decision making ability of the young and may result in consequences such as STDs/pregnancy... actual rape is nothing less than a sadistic act of violence and should be treated as such (IMO the fact that sex itself was involved is unimportant).  Even though most would agree both actions are wrong, they are NOT in the same class.

Also in case you can't tell from what I just wrote, I also consider women beaters to be just as despicable as rapists.  I don't think it would be the actual sex aspect of rape that would be traumatizing (as I don't see sex itself to be inherently bad), but the violence and the fear of additional violence.  So I think that victim of domestic violence would also would suffer considerable trauma and should have access to the same help resources that a rape victim would have access to.

Of course both would likely suffer physical trauma as well as the mental trauma(rape does often result in tearing etc) but I think the mental trauma is far worse and long-lasting yet commonly overlooked/diminished.

Also I am well aware how off topic I went, but that is how I roll.  As to your comment - yeah Conservatives must be extremely willfully ignorant to believe that pregnancy does not result from rape (and what they don't say out loud - that thus it isn't such a big deal).  Hmm why are they loosing the female vote again?
 
2013-08-02 02:17:58 PM  

Selector: The guy who says "populus" when he means "populace" is calling other people uneducated.


Why would this be amusing? The word "populace" is derived from "populus", and both have identical meanings in English; the former simply has more common usage in English. Rather, what you should be laughing about is being pretentious with the use of "populus". Had he used "populous", the adjective, mock away, but he did not.
 
2013-08-02 02:19:16 PM  

monoski: So what happens when all their dads, uncles and step-fathers are in jail?


Profit?
 
2013-08-02 02:23:07 PM  

Selector: The guy who says "populus" when he means "populace" is calling other people uneducated. Lawl.


'populus', when not capitalized, is a valid, though uncommon, Latin word meaning "people".

Interesting situation. It was either a typo as you suggest or you're mocking him for knowing a hell of a lot more than you....
 
2013-08-02 02:28:43 PM  

FarkedOver: Are the conservatives trying to control women under the guise of "We're tough on rape!"? This is so anti-woman, it is sickening.


I am trying to remain just radically opposed to nose-up-my-crotch governing, but this is testing my resolve not to kill something. Is there ANY line they won't cross?

Actually, I doubt this one will stand. It would also slut-shame men -- and that's never been a part of the GOP platform.
 
2013-08-02 02:34:24 PM  

swaniefrmreddeer: Does Mississippi really want to know how inbred their population is?


Probably not, but I'm kind of curious.
 
2013-08-02 02:41:32 PM  

DarwiOdrade: [fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net image 501x418]


That middle one is incorrect.
Drug policy and teen pregnancy campaigns both consist of "Just say no."
 
2013-08-02 02:43:16 PM  
"It is to stop children from being raped," said Bryant, who started his career as a deputy sheriff in the 1970s.

Fine, when it's an adult who got the 16 year old pregnant. And I'm not talking her boyfriend who turned 18 yesterday... The problem is that a lot of the teens who turn into teens moms, got pregnant from their equally young boyfriends, so it really doesn't help much. Besides, it's only going to "stop" girls from getting pregnant if the person you bust makes a habit of it. If it's the neighbor and this girl is the only person he ever did this with is the pregnant girl, it's a little late to "stop" anything...
 
2013-08-02 02:43:36 PM  

Frozboz: FTA:  "It is to stop children from being raped," said Bryant, who started his career as a deputy sheriff in the 1970s. "One of the things that go on in this state that's always haunted me when I was a law-enforcement officer is seeing the 14- and 15-year-old girl that is raped by the neighbor next door and down the street."

Wait a minute, pregnancy from rape?  Didn't they tell us that kind of thing was impossible?  Or does a woman's ability to "shut that whole thing down" not come until later in life, like magically when they turn 18?


But this is statutory rape, not rape rape. That means they'll prosecute the offender, but not let the victim have an abortion.
 
2013-08-02 02:44:35 PM  

DarwiOdrade: [fbcdn-sphotos-a-a.akamaihd.net image 501x418]


I'm gonna have to save this graphic.I guess it at least means they've got their shiat together 2/3 of the time?
 
2013-08-02 02:56:44 PM  

HotWingConspiracy: A group of men got together and this is what they came up with. This was the best they could do, and it's all because they pretend to care about what's in a bronze age story book.


No.

Bryant's staff says the idea for the law came from public meetings conducted by the governor's teen pregnancy prevention task force - a group that focuses mostly on promoting abstinence.

The goal is to shame and intimidate young females into not having sex by exposing who their sexual partners are. In other words, the pregnancy prevention task force can't get teens to chose abstinence on their own initiative so the state will shame and humiliate them into choosing it. And the best part is that the state can do so under the color of preventing rape.

So who are the real rapists here? The state who abuses its power to shame, humiliate, and threaten teen girls to get what it wants or the infinitesimal minority of men who attempt to do the same and upon which the state attempt to justify its behavior. The worst kind of abuser is the abuser that abuses you under the color of protecting you from abuse.
 
2013-08-02 02:58:10 PM  
the derp level with is  off the friggen charts,
 
2013-08-02 03:01:57 PM  

Ashyukun: A task force put together to figure out how to reduce the number of teen preganancies... came up with THIS?!?!

(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

Free condoms and birth control pills, proper instruction on how to use them as well as basic biology sex-ed class, and access to counsellors who will answer their questions and concerns compassionately and without judgement or shaming. Teach them that yes, the only 100% way to not get pregnant is to not have sex, but if/when you DO, here's how to say safe. Kids are going to have sex- accept it, and just make sure they're doing it safely and not getting all kinds of diseases and getting pregnant by the schoolbus-full...


But that requires them to accept their kids having sex, which in turn means they aren't properly punishing sluts.  So you see the predicament we're in.
 
2013-08-02 03:03:16 PM  

Mikey1969: I'm gonna have to save this graphic.I guess it at least means they've got their shiat together 2/3 of the time?


Yea.... because if there's two problems the U.S. doesn't have in comparison to its peers it's gun violence and drugs.
 
2013-08-02 03:09:16 PM  

austerity101: But that requires them to accept their kids having sex, which in turn means they aren't properly punishing sluts. So you see the predicament we're in.


I know, they could put the girl in stocks while she gives birth! Right in the public square, to serve as a warning to the other womenfolk in the community.
 
2013-08-02 03:13:24 PM  
Doesn't go far enough. A couple of years ago, there was a fark link to an article about some state legislature considering making paternity tests mandatory for all babies. The reasoning was that once the ink is on the birth certificate, the legal father can't really be changed, and cheating whores have the power to ruin a guy's life.

I think the bill got hung up on who had to pay for the test.
 
2013-08-02 03:29:52 PM  
Never count out Mississippi to provide the stupidest thing you'll read today.
 
2013-08-02 03:30:00 PM  
Effing American taliban turning the derp up to 11
 
2013-08-02 03:39:15 PM  

Selector: rudemix: Sounds like a great use of funds in a state so broke it'd have to fart to get a scent in its pocket. Brilliant conservative thinking again to end young pregnancies. Why waste that money on education, it's Mississippi. They have an above average tolerance of an uneducated populus in every other way. Why not sex ed as well.

yeah...I know the fart joke is better heard than seen.

The guy who says "populus" when he means "populace" is calling other people uneducated. Lawl.


Damn...my whole point is eroded. Fine, let the populus of Missourrissipi carry on as is. I'm sure the GOP leaders in Mississippi  are only concerned with teenage vaginas because its the right thing to do.
 
Displayed 50 of 85 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report