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(Daily Mail)   Japanese diet guru claims it's possible to lose weight by breathing heavily for just five minutes a day. You might not lose weight, but you will lose consciousness   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 48
    More: Stupid, Long Breath Diet, Diet of Japan, Japanese, physiologists  
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2740 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Jul 2013 at 4:14 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



48 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-07-31 02:52:54 PM  
Hey, you can't snack if you're unconscious
 
2013-07-31 02:58:56 PM  

SmackLT: Hey, you can't snack if you're unconscious


What if you eat sunlight?
 
2013-07-31 03:00:33 PM  

SmackLT: Hey, you can't snack if you're unconscious


EXACTLY
 
2013-07-31 03:38:22 PM  
If he's right who's the first company to start selling cans of Diet Air Lite?
 
2013-07-31 04:17:22 PM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: If he's right who's the first company to start selling cans of Diet Air Lite?


PerriAir
/mel brooks
 
2013-07-31 04:17:52 PM  
I'll stick to inhaling beers

http://youtu.be/ACgJhE2L7Ms?t=46s
 
2013-07-31 04:19:10 PM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: If he's right who's the first company to start selling cans of Diet Air Lite?


I was going to go with Spaceballs but apparently it's already been done.
 
2013-07-31 04:19:26 PM  
home.comcast.net
 
2013-07-31 04:21:02 PM  
Real pimps snort lines of Doritos dust.
 
2013-07-31 04:21:22 PM  
You can induce heavy breathing through exercise.

#TRUEFAX
 
2013-07-31 04:22:28 PM  
If you're heavy breathing clenbuterol tabs and amphetamine dust you'll be skinny in no time.

Add in some DNP (just not enough to melt your brain) and you'll have a beach body in a week*!

*Enjoy it, you will die the following day.
 
2013-07-31 04:23:37 PM  
Wise or otherwise?
 
2013-07-31 04:24:10 PM  
It's a funny thing about hyperventilation. Your body has a GREAT way of compensating and correcting your respiratory alkalosis. Namely, making your ass pass right the hell out and DFO right there.
 
2013-07-31 04:24:40 PM  
I prefer to learn English while I shed pounds
cdn.trendhunterstatic.com
 
2013-07-31 04:32:38 PM  
Some have reported a loss of up to 12 lbs on the lamaze diet.
 
2013-07-31 04:37:15 PM  
www.wearysloth.com
It's true, you won't live long as a little breather
 
2013-07-31 04:37:38 PM  
CTRL+F "constrict"

no results

// leaving thread, depressed
 
2013-07-31 04:39:12 PM  
Malarky? Or effective way?
 
2013-07-31 04:42:03 PM  
csb
My first semester in Urbana we knuckleheads experimented with hyperventilating to a Moody Blues album.  We huffed and we puffed until the fat kid passed out in the corner behind the door.  It was too much work for the mild buzz so we mooched some cash and walked to the campus pub.  For the record, despite all the heavy breathing, the fat kid was still fat at the end of freshman year.
/csb
 
2013-07-31 04:45:02 PM  
Can Kate Upton be the one that helps me breath heavy for 5 minutes?  if so, I'm in!
 
2013-07-31 04:48:40 PM  

Spyder_Monkey: Malarky? Or effective way?


High five
 
2013-07-31 04:48:45 PM  
www.sitcomsonline.com
 
2013-07-31 04:56:26 PM  
....So I wont have that going for me?.....
 
2013-07-31 04:59:23 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: SmackLT: Hey, you can't snack if you're unconscious

EXACTLRY



FTFM ^_^
 
2013-07-31 05:04:26 PM  
So that guy whose been calling me every other night was trying to help me lose weight?
 
2013-07-31 05:21:43 PM  
Well, it might not make you lose any weight in and of itself, but if it raises your blood oxygen level it might elevate your mood, giving you the drive to go and do some real exercise. The hardest part about exercise is summoning the will to do it, which is damned hard to do if you're depressed because you're fat.
 
2013-07-31 05:23:45 PM  

Psylent1: So that guy whose been calling me every other night was trying to help me lose weight?


He only had one thought on his brain.
 
2013-07-31 05:26:15 PM  
And of course, elevating people's moods reduces the amount of stress-eating that they do. There's a certain point where weight gain becomes a vicious cycle wherein being fat makes you miserable and being miserable stimulates your body to cram itself full of food because it thinks there's hard times a-comin'.
 
2013-07-31 05:39:09 PM  
Seems legit
 
2013-07-31 05:48:19 PM  
The first involves tensing the buttocks while standing with one foot in front of the body and placing most of the body's weight on the back foot.

In this position, the dieter is encouraged to inhale for three seconds while lifting their arms above their head.

They are then told to breathe out while tensing all of their muscles for seven seconds.


So, you're tricking otherwise sedentary people into getting a minimum of two minutes of physical activity a day? Sure, why not.
 
2013-07-31 05:58:41 PM  
Take a laxative and blow it out your ass.
 
2013-07-31 06:00:46 PM  
application.denofgeek.com

Beefcake!  ... BEEFCAKE!!!
 
2013-07-31 06:01:03 PM  
Damn subby, you missed an opportunity with the Japanese senate, which is named the Diet.

/me and my 0 submissions will just see ourselves out
 
2013-07-31 06:01:16 PM  
My fat ass pants that much after going up a flight of stairs, and I haven't lost an ounce.
 
2013-07-31 06:13:26 PM  
img.gawkerassets.com

Agrees.
 
2013-07-31 06:22:39 PM  
I suppose I should add the video component to that image.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PyxpXgS5deU
 
2013-07-31 06:45:11 PM  
It appears to be more about the isometric tensioning of muscles while breathing. Do it hard enough and you could rack up some exercise points.
 
2013-07-31 07:11:19 PM  
FOOBIES.COM:Your premier weight loss destination.
 
2013-07-31 07:39:59 PM  
of course it's possible. it's possible to lose weight without even doing that. just don't eat very much, and eventually you'll be thin, although possibly miserable.
 
2013-07-31 08:29:49 PM  
Lose weight by heavy breathing for five minutes a day. That's what Your Mom promised me.

Really. I am disappoint, son (or daughter).

Nobody read sexual ennuendo into that headline?

I think I might be lost. This isn't Fark.com. I must have a wandered into a parallel universe again.

I did grow a beard recently. I must be my evil twin.
 
2013-07-31 08:32:09 PM  
Oops! I see somebody did read sex into the headline. I stand corrected.

Now I must go shave.
 
2013-07-31 09:56:42 PM  
You will feel light headed.
 
2013-07-31 09:58:12 PM  
img.photobucket.com
 
2013-07-31 11:15:21 PM  

Cthulhu_is_my_homeboy: Well, it might not make you lose any weight in and of itself, but if it raises your blood oxygen level it might elevate your mood, giving you the drive to go and do some real exercise. The hardest part about exercise is summoning the will to do it, which is damned hard to do if you're depressed because you're fat.


Actually, based on things I have read and other similar yoga, and Tony Robbins videos I have seen, there might be something too this.

When you breathe, your lungs take in oxygen and put out carbon dioxide. It is one of the ways we get rid of "waste" in our bodies. We already release waste two ways every day and we sauna because we sweat out toxins that way. So would it make sense that we could augment that too? We drink tons of water and eat more fiber to flush out our intestines and the organs that function with food waste processes, so wouldn't breathing out for twice as long as breathing in do the same thing as flushing our lungs?

In yoga breathing exercises are done and I've seen videos on these techniques but never tried them.

But it is common knowledge that any aerobic exercise burns fat so why would this be that far fetched.

Also, when a person is stressed they shallow breathe and have elevated cortisol levels which hold weight. Think about how many times you have heard someone told to "take a deep breath and let it out slowly". Some of us do that instinctively anyway, and it does work if you do it enough , so why wouldn't deep breathing lead to a reduction in the stress hormone?

We should all try it. If it works we will get credited with starting the next great fad diet.

The Fark Diet

Awesome.
 
2013-07-31 11:17:26 PM  

Ceiling Moran: Agrees.


Oh yeah, seen that one too. High comedy lol
 
2013-08-01 12:26:41 AM  

ocd002: Cthulhu_is_my_homeboy: Well, it might not make you lose any weight in and of itself, but if it raises your blood oxygen level it might elevate your mood, giving you the drive to go and do some real exercise. The hardest part about exercise is summoning the will to do it, which is damned hard to do if you're depressed because you're fat.

Actually, based on things I have read and other similar yoga, and Tony Robbins videos I have seen, there might be something too this.

When you breathe, your lungs take in oxygen and put out carbon dioxide. It is one of the ways we get rid of "waste" in our bodies. We already release waste two ways every day and we sauna because we sweat out toxins that way. So would it make sense that we could augment that too? We drink tons of water and eat more fiber to flush out our intestines and the organs that function with food waste processes, so wouldn't breathing out for twice as long as breathing in do the same thing as flushing our lungs?

In yoga breathing exercises are done and I've seen videos on these techniques but never tried them.

But it is common knowledge that any aerobic exercise burns fat so why would this be that far fetched.

Also, when a person is stressed they shallow breathe and have elevated cortisol levels which hold weight. Think about how many times you have heard someone told to "take a deep breath and let it out slowly". Some of us do that instinctively anyway, and it does work if you do it enough , so why wouldn't deep breathing lead to a reduction in the stress hormone?

We should all try it. If it works we will get credited with starting the next great fad diet.

The Fark Diet

Awesome.


Yep. Yogic breathing is nothing new. This guy certainly didn't invent it.

It works. Hard for me to say to what extent, as everyone I know who is health minded enough to use it also eat right and exercise. From my own personal experience I lost more with all three than when just using diet and exercise.

Also, ocd002 has it right (from my understanding). Its more about blood oxygen level helping the body rid itself of toxins rather than isometrics from the breathing, although I'm sure that doesn't hurt.
 
2013-08-01 02:08:16 AM  

ocd002: When you breathe, your lungs take in oxygen and put out carbon dioxide. It is one of the ways we get rid of "waste" in our bodies. We already release waste two ways every day and we sauna because we sweat out toxins that way. So would it make sense that we could augment that too? We drink tons of water and eat more fiber to flush out our intestines and the organs that function with food waste processes, so wouldn't breathing out for twice as long as breathing in do the same thing as flushing our lungs?


The whole "toxins" are making you fat/sick/depressed/whatever thing is a bunch of new-age pseudoscience loosely based on Chinese folk medicine and some eastern religions.

If your body was so full of toxic substances that you could eliminate them just by breathing heavily (or putting Japanese kinoki pads on your feet), you'd be dead, not fat. The body stores fat in response to stress because evolution has primed us to pack on fat in expectation that hard times ahead means scarce food. Certain toxic substances do get stored in fat, but fat is not created in response to the presence of those substances. They just happen to be fat-soluble rather than water-soluble.
 
2013-08-01 05:42:38 AM  
Good sex, breath heavy.........what's the problem?
 
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