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(Business Insider)   Want to get into a top university? You'd better be prepared to write an essay inspired by a giant warehouse-store jar of mustard, or explain just where Waldo has been all this time   (businessinsider.com) divider line 28
    More: Strange, college application, Nancy Brinker, intellectual freedom, jars  
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3277 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Jul 2013 at 9:31 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



28 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-07-30 09:11:54 AM
Because nothing better demonstrates creativity than one's ability to concoct an essay responding to some randomly off-the-wall, "ha-ha look at how wacky" topic selected by some bureaucratic drone who's far more interested in how fast he can churn through some vast pile of uniform submissions than in enjoying actual individual thought.
 
2013-07-30 09:22:22 AM

Pocket Ninja: Because nothing better demonstrates creativity than one's ability to concoct an essay responding to some randomly off-the-wall, "ha-ha look at how wacky" topic selected by some bureaucratic drone who's far more interested in how fast he can churn through some vast pile of uniform submissions than in enjoying actual individual thought.


So bitter at 9am in the morning. Better have a muffin, pal.
 
2013-07-30 09:34:46 AM
I would've liked writing an essay about the mustard one. Instead I had to invent some bullshiat about how I as a seventeen year-old kid had lived a transformative life because I was so self-aware that I knew my life as a middle-class white kid was just what colleges were looking for.
 
2013-07-30 09:35:52 AM
Jesus, this explains alot.
 
2013-07-30 09:38:22 AM
I once did 10 pages on how to make marinara sauce from the point of view of the spoon, with the subplot of an escape of the paring knife and a bunch of forks. I wonder if that would have counted. It was just for a grade for a creative writing class, but the professor thought it would have made a good kid's book.
 
2013-07-30 09:38:54 AM
i0.kym-cdn.com

/HOT
// Obligatory
 
2013-07-30 09:47:27 AM
www.spacetimestudios.com

/hotlinked
 
2013-07-30 09:47:53 AM
Tom Wopat and fisting. Extrapolate. 8 pages. Go.
 
2013-07-30 09:50:59 AM
I rather like this one: "You have just finished your three hundred page autobiography. Please submit page 217."


You could have all sorts of fun with that one.
 
2013-07-30 09:51:12 AM
Waldo and the Rusty Trombone - 12 pages, 1 hour. Go.
 
2013-07-30 09:52:22 AM

naughtyrev: I rather like this one: "You have just finished your three hundred page autobiography. Please submit page 217."


You could have all sorts of fun with that one.


...wiping off the mirror, I noticed the other blonde...
 
2013-07-30 09:52:39 AM
The jar of mustard represents your future in the increasingly small pool of big-box employers, now that everyone and their retarded stepbrother has a degree.

/good luck with those intractable loans
 
2013-07-30 10:03:47 AM
static4.businessinsider.com

The males herd the females into a shrinking ball and signal when they have selected the one to get 'airtight'.
 
2013-07-30 10:04:23 AM
Waldo hasn't been anywhere. He's not real.
 
2013-07-30 10:09:47 AM

Pocket Ninja: Because nothing better demonstrates creativity than one's ability to concoct an essay responding to some randomly off-the-wall, "ha-ha look at how wacky" topic selected by some bureaucratic drone who's far more interested in how fast he can churn through some vast pile of uniform submissions than in enjoying actual individual thought.


Yep.  It's nice to know that utterly inept and totally incompetent hiring practices are starting earlier and earlier.

Maybe they should start offering degrees in navigating USAJobs.

/Make sure to have your 30 year old transcripts.
 
2013-07-30 10:11:13 AM
www.google.com

THERE'S Waldo!  Sheesh!  Fark, you are a disappoint.
 
2013-07-30 10:28:10 AM
I'm afraid I don't understand the Waldo question. He's actually in each and every one of the pictures, isn't he? What more is there to explain?
 
2013-07-30 10:32:57 AM

naughtyrev: I rather like this one: "You have just finished your three hundred page autobiography. Please submit page 217."


You could have all sorts of fun with that one.


"At this point, I began writing my college entrance essays. I knew it would be a long and arduous task, but i was completely unprepared for what lay ahead.

'You have just finished your three hundred page autobiography. Please submit page 217.'

An odd entrance question, but potentially interesting. I started writing.

"At this point, I began writing my college entrance essays. I knew it would be a long and arduous task, but I was completely unprepared for what lay ahead..."


/RECURSION OH GOD
 
2013-07-30 10:41:03 AM
How did I know U of C was going to be featured in this article?

born_yesterday: Pocket Ninja: Because nothing better demonstrates creativity than one's ability to concoct an essay responding to some randomly off-the-wall, "ha-ha look at how wacky" topic selected by some bureaucratic drone who's far more interested in how fast he can churn through some vast pile of uniform submissions than in enjoying actual individual thought.

Yep.  It's nice to know that utterly inept and totally incompetent hiring practices are starting earlier and earlier.

Maybe they should start offering degrees in navigating USAJobs.

/Make sure to have your 30 year old transcripts.


So what if a school encourages creative and unconventional thinking and has wildly successful graduates? Boohoo. Sorry no one ever let you guys have fun and learn at the same time.

Fun
 
2013-07-30 10:43:44 AM
sidebar:

i309.photobucket.com
 
2013-07-30 11:00:27 AM

elysive: How did I know U of C was going to be featured in this article?

born_yesterday: Pocket Ninja: Because nothing better demonstrates creativity than one's ability to concoct an essay responding to some randomly off-the-wall, "ha-ha look at how wacky" topic selected by some bureaucratic drone who's far more interested in how fast he can churn through some vast pile of uniform submissions than in enjoying actual individual thought.

Yep.  It's nice to know that utterly inept and totally incompetent hiring practices are starting earlier and earlier.

Maybe they should start offering degrees in navigating USAJobs.

/Make sure to have your 30 year old transcripts.

So what if a school encourages creative and unconventional thinking and has wildly successful graduates? Boohoo. Sorry no one ever let you guys have fun and learn at the same time.

Fun


Yeah.  An event hosted for students, by students.  When it's used to determine qualification for admission, maybe it will be relevant to this thread.

/We had crab feasts and baseball nights.
//Glad "how much you can eat" wasn't a qualifier for admission
 
2013-07-30 11:06:56 AM

gopher321: Pocket Ninja: Because nothing better demonstrates creativity than one's ability to concoct an essay responding to some randomly off-the-wall, "ha-ha look at how wacky" topic selected by some bureaucratic drone who's far more interested in how fast he can churn through some vast pile of uniform submissions than in enjoying actual individual thought.

So bitter at 9am in the morning. Better have a muffin, pal.


Yea, it usually take him until 9am in the afternoon to get that worked up.
 
2013-07-30 11:31:49 AM

born_yesterday: Yeah.  An event hosted for students, by students.  When it's used to determine qualification for admission, maybe it will be relevant to this thread.

/We had crab feasts and baseball nights.
//Glad "how much you can eat" wasn't a qualifier for admission


Scav Hunt is extremely intrusive, interferes with regular class schedules (yet students often get leave to participate) and sometimes skirts on the illegal (breeder reactors in the quad? Yeaaa). It would be shut down in a heart beat without administrative support.

The College Essay is actually a source of pride at the U of C and in many respects does reflect the college's culture. If you cant fit in there or dont like the application, go apply elsewhere. I hear plenty of Ivy Leagues have boring applications right up your alley!

/I'm sure the standard essay prompts are just sooo revealing and not at all a technicality when an admissions specialist has read hundreds to thousands of iterations of the same essay every year for a decade
//tell us about an obstacle you've overcome: I read about this college admission's practice I didn't agree with on Fark and it almost ruined me! After years of therapy and Cheetohs, I was able to carry on.
 
2013-07-30 12:01:07 PM
All I knew at 17 was that I didn't want to be a farmer. I was raised on a farm. I had already raised a bull from a calf, bottle fed it, groomed it daily, showed it for 4-H, and eaten it.

Circle of life.
 
2013-07-30 01:01:52 PM

Pugdaddyk: [i0.kym-cdn.com image 378x504]

/HOT
// Obligatory


Came here to see this.

/thanks for the memories
 
kth
2013-07-30 01:08:06 PM
I recall a friend's amusing Princeton (?) application.

What two attributes are most important for success?

"Brevity, wit."

He did just fine at Stanford.
 
2013-07-30 01:44:18 PM

Pocket Ninja: Because nothing better demonstrates creativity than one's ability to concoct an essay responding to some randomly off-the-wall, "ha-ha look at how wacky" topic selected by some bureaucratic drone who's far more interested in how fast he can churn through some vast pile of uniform submissions than in enjoying actual individual thought.


Actually, that's sort of the point. Not the wackiness, but how folks treat a challenge, and can they rise to it? How you do something, is as important to accomplishing the task. Will the applicant fit into the campus culture? Are they the sort that will respond to what the faculty have in mind? You apply to see if you fit as well. You don't like the process, it's probably not going to be a fit for you either, so these are exactly the sorts of things that should be a sign both for you and admissions.
 
2013-07-30 09:42:07 PM
"University of Chicago is perhaps the most notorious college to make their applicants really get creative.
Here are a few actual, real essay prompts that students have been given there.

So where is Waldo, really?Find X"Have you ever walked through the aisles of a warehouse store like Costco or Sam's Club and wondered who would buy a jar of mustard a foot and a half tall?"
You know, maybe this is why China and India are eclipsing the US.  I'd also bet the universities in Mao's homeland have less socio-economic dogma in the classroom than in Milton Friedman's old lair at the U. of Chicago.
 
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