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(Chicago Trib)   Man charged with murder for stabbing his wife to death because she refused to have sex with him one last time before they broke up   (chicagotribune.com) divider line 45
    More: Fail, DuPage County, Illinois, Kurtis Worley, first-degree murders, stabbing, emergency surgery  
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3856 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Jul 2013 at 8:28 AM (37 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



45 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-07-30 08:32:40 AM
What a f*cked up story. Those kids are never going to be right again
 
2013-07-30 08:34:28 AM
It's a shame, she would have rediscovered her love for him after a proper penising.
 
2013-07-30 08:35:05 AM
Some things were just meant to be.
There's a reason for everything, right?
When one set of legs closes, another set opens up.
 
2013-07-30 08:35:16 AM
This behavior is not acceptable.
 
2013-07-30 08:35:29 AM
Must be some awesome pussy to want it that bad

\yeah ok, I apologize for that one
 
2013-07-30 08:36:22 AM
Breakup sex is always the best sex.
 
2013-07-30 08:37:41 AM
So did he still get some?
 
2013-07-30 08:38:16 AM
"Have sex with me?"

"No."

*stabbity stabbity stab*

"NOW say no! Ha ha ha!"


ew.
 
2013-07-30 08:39:17 AM
Where is a pic of the woman hot enough to kill for?
 
2013-07-30 08:40:36 AM
Dad?
 
2013-07-30 08:41:06 AM

HotIgneous Intruder: Some things were just meant to be.
There's a reason for everything, right?
When one set of legs closes, another set opens up.


I'm sensing that this guy wasn't really quite ready to let go yet.
 
2013-07-30 08:41:09 AM

DirtyDeadGhostofEbenezerCooke: Breakup sex is always the best sex.


This guy begs to differ.

i.imgur.com
 
2013-07-30 08:42:23 AM
Aw, dude. That kind of thing just makes you look desperate.
 
2013-07-30 08:45:37 AM

wambu: Where is a pic of the woman hot enough to kill for?


From another news story:

media.nbcchicago.com
 
2013-07-30 08:45:41 AM
I wonder if this gal died regretting that she fell for a bad boy type that she thought only she could change.
 
2013-07-30 08:47:32 AM

wambu: Where is a pic of the woman hot enough to kill for?


Right here:
 
2013-07-30 08:50:35 AM
The article doesn't mention him getting stabbed, but it looks like he has staples in his neck.

What's up wit dat?
 
2013-07-30 08:50:36 AM
Kurtis Worley, 33, was ordered held on $3 million bail in the DuPage County jail, charged with the first-degree murder of his wife, Martha Worley, 39, who was found stabbed and pummelled early Friday in the bedroom of the family home.

Looks like someone got a thesaurus for their birthday.
 
2013-07-30 08:53:51 AM

ShowhermyO-face: So did he still get some?


www.iconsoffright.com

/oblig
 
2013-07-30 08:55:46 AM
Would it have killed her to say 'yes' one last time?
 
2013-07-30 08:57:21 AM

Wolf892: I wonder if this gal died regretting that she fell for a bad boy type that she thought only she could change.


The women that stupid never learn to feel regret.
 
2013-07-30 08:58:33 AM
He should have waited a couple weeks or got a new girlfriend. Those are both sure ways to get an ex to sleep with him.
 
2013-07-30 08:59:09 AM
I never understood break-up sex in the first place.

"You took my heart in your hands, then crushed it by screwing Ted from the office. I don't ever want to see you again. But... Maybe?"
 
2013-07-30 09:00:38 AM

miss diminutive: Kurtis Worley, 33, was ordered held on $3 million bail in the DuPage County jail, charged with the first-degree murder of his wife, Martha Worley, 39, who was found stabbed and pummelled early Friday in the bedroom of the family home.

Looks like someone got a thesaurus for their birthday.


Between every word processing program made already having one built in and the countless online resources, I doubt people are buying many thesauruses these days.
 
2013-07-30 09:01:58 AM

Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: I never understood break-up sex in the first place.

"You took my heart in your hands, then crushed it by screwing Ted from the office. I don't ever want to see you again. But... Maybe?"


My ex kept showing up at my apartment for oral. I just assumed my man juice must be delicious and mildly addictive. Now you're trying to make me question the underlying psychology and you're ruining it for me.

Also:

www.trbimg.com

She should have known this was going to happen when he started growing in his Rapin'-and-Murderin' Beard.
 
2013-07-30 09:03:52 AM

Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: I never understood break-up sex in the first place.

"You took my heart in your hands, then crushed it by screwing Ted from the office. I don't ever want to see you again. But... Maybe?"


Really. The known is never as good as the strange.
 
2013-07-30 09:04:44 AM

Wolf892: I wonder if this gal died regretting that she fell for a bad boy type that she thought only she could change.


Are you projecting? There's nothing in the story to say was he was like before, just what happened.
 
2013-07-30 09:13:01 AM
I'm not saying he shoulda killed her, but I understand...

076dd0a50e0c1255009e-bd4b8aabaca29897bc751dfaf75b290c.r40.cf1.rackcdn.com
 
2013-07-30 09:13:47 AM
"Look, I'm stabbing you repeatedly with something whether you like it or not. Just think about it and make the right decision, here."
 
2013-07-30 09:26:25 AM
Was he setting her up for a 'Dirty Sanchez'?

Woulda been a good story later.
 
2013-07-30 09:28:11 AM

miss diminutive: Kurtis Worley, 33, was ordered held on $3 million bail in the DuPage County jail, charged with the first-degree murder of his wife, Martha Worley, 39, who was found stabbed and pummeled early Friday in the bedroom of the family home.

Looks like someone got a thesaurus for their birthday.


"Pummeled or cudgeled? Hmmmm...."  *flips coin*
 
2013-07-30 09:29:43 AM

freewill: Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: I never understood break-up sex in the first place.

"You took my heart in your hands, then crushed it by screwing Ted from the office. I don't ever want to see you again. But... Maybe?"

My ex kept showing up at my apartment for oral. I just assumed my man juice must be delicious and mildly addictive. Now you're trying to make me question the underlying psychology and you're ruining it for me.

Also:



She should have known this was going to happen when he started growing in his Rapin'-and-Murderin' Beard.


Going by a previous Fark link, I'm pretty sure that is an a-raping and a-murderin' beard
 
2013-07-30 09:30:33 AM

airsupport: The article doesn't mention him getting stabbed, but it looks like he has staples in his neck.

What's up wit dat?


Another story states that he slit his own throat after attacking his wife and stepson.
 
2013-07-30 09:36:27 AM

freewill: She should have known this was going to happen when he started growing in his Rapin'-and-Murderin' Beard.


Wow... is that Louis C.K.'s less successful brother?
 
2013-07-30 09:45:58 AM
Did he take her to the lake?
 
2013-07-30 10:32:37 AM

HotIgneous Intruder: Some things were just meant to be.
There's a reason for everything, right?
When one set of legs closes, another set opens up.


A woman's best friends are her legs, but all best friends must part.

/snicker
 
2013-07-30 11:05:45 AM
Worley, who said he works at a warehouse for a flooring distributor, told the judge that the family had lived in the neighborhood for 11 years.

In related news, job seekers in the Chicago area I believe we have an opening!
 
2013-07-30 11:25:52 AM

KellyKellyKelly: airsupport: The article doesn't mention him getting stabbed, but it looks like he has staples in his neck.

What's up wit dat?

Another story states that he slit his own throat after attacking his wife and stepson.


Thank you.
 
2013-07-30 11:58:41 AM

freewill: My ex kept showing up at my apartment for oral. I just assumed my man juice must be delicious and mildly addictive. Now you're trying to make me question the underlying psychology and you're ruining it for me.


It was a misguided attempt to win you back. You thought it was just for fun, she had an agenda.

Evidently it is appropriate to deny her even if she assures you that she knows you're not getting back together.

I had a similar experience and was branded the asshole because I kept taking my ex up on it after clarifying that it was strictly casual.
 
2013-07-30 12:07:02 PM

Pangea: I had a similar experience and was branded the asshole because I kept taking my ex up on it after clarifying that it was strictly casual.


She bought her tickets. She knew what she was getting into.
 
2013-07-30 04:46:23 PM

freewill: Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: I never understood break-up sex in the first place.

"You took my heart in your hands, then crushed it by screwing Ted from the office. I don't ever want to see you again. But... Maybe?"

My ex kept showing up at my apartment for oral. I just assumed my man juice must be delicious and mildly addictive. Now you're trying to make me question the underlying psychology and you're ruining it for me.

Also:

[www.trbimg.com image 420x525]

She should have known this was going to happen when he started growing in his Rapin'-and-Murderin' Beard.


that's always a dead giveaway.
 
2013-07-30 11:38:02 PM

ShowhermyO-face: So did he still get some?


Well, the article made no mention of a necrophilia charge.
 
2013-07-31 12:03:07 PM

wambu: Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: I never understood break-up sex in the first place.

"You took my heart in your hands, then crushed it by screwing Ted from the office. I don't ever want to see you again. But... Maybe?"

Really. The known is never as good as the strange.


You need some better quality known. Hooking up with someone who knows all your kinks and hot spots, and you theirs, can be a hundred times more satisfying than strange - as long as you keep your nuts intact. And so far I've been pretty lucky on that front.
 
2013-07-31 12:04:38 PM
They reportedly heard their mother's screams and tried to enter the locked master bedroom, and when they pounded on the door, Kurtis Worley opened it, "naked and looking like a psychopath," the sons told police.

People, stop teaching your kids that psychopath and psychotic are the same thing. The media has finally fixed its shiat, your turn.
 
2013-07-31 03:38:11 PM

foxyshadis: wambu: Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: I never understood break-up sex in the first place.

"You took my heart in your hands, then crushed it by screwing Ted from the office. I don't ever want to see you again. But... Maybe?"

Really. The known is never as good as the strange.

You need some better quality known. Hooking up with someone who knows all your kinks and hot spots, and you theirs, can be a hundred times more satisfying than strange - as long as you keep your nuts intact. And so far I've been pretty lucky on that front.


Awesome sex is awesome sex; bad sex is good too.
 
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