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(CNN)   Choking warning labels on food? Are people really that stupid? *facepalm*   (thechart.blogs.cnn.com) divider line 95
    More: Sad, child health, baby carrot, Years Ago, raising awareness, Adolescent Health  
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6910 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Jul 2013 at 3:23 AM (37 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



95 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-07-29 11:50:30 PM
Yes they are.
Also it's an attempt to not be sued if someone does choke.
 
2013-07-30 12:17:27 AM
What more do you expect from a nation that banned these...

www.cpsc.gov
 
2013-07-30 12:19:22 AM
No, but there's a sh*tload of second-rate lawyers willing to pretend their clients are

/and convince a jury of their pears
 
2013-07-30 12:51:37 AM
They should put the same thing on Atlanta Falcon playoff tickets.
 
2013-07-30 01:45:03 AM
Isn't it about time for Wonko the Sane to build us our asylum?
 
2013-07-30 01:47:31 AM
Can we please remove all labels? Pretty please?!!
The quicker we kill of the dumb people the better.

Seriously, HOW do bic pens still have little tiny plastic plugs on the end?
I still cant use one without biting the end off.
 
2013-07-30 01:48:06 AM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: No, but there's a sh*tload of second-rate lawyers willing to pretend their clients are

/and convince a jury of their pears



wrotemeamanual.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-07-30 01:51:43 AM

namatad: The quicker we kill of off the dumb people the better.


Unfortunate typo is unfortunate.
 
2013-07-30 01:53:33 AM

Bathia_Mapes: MaudlinMutantMollusk: No, but there's a sh*tload of second-rate lawyers willing to pretend their clients are

/and convince a jury of their pears


[wrotemeamanual.files.wordpress.com image 287x320]


Yep

/a jury of their pears
//and other assorted fruits and vegetables
///how else do they win some of these cases?
 
2013-07-30 02:51:28 AM
Applied Eugenics.
 
2013-07-30 03:25:43 AM
Well, its hotdogs and look like too many women be trying something they shouldnt.
 
2013-07-30 03:31:31 AM
What a choking hazard might look like.

www.jestersmc.com
 
2013-07-30 03:39:30 AM
Wait till she finds out about oral sex.
 
2013-07-30 03:41:06 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-07-30 03:43:27 AM
Okay... there are some foods parent's shouldn't give their children do to a high choke possibility. Parents learn about this either from a intro-book, being an older child and helping raise the youngers, or aren't literate enough to read the warning you put on a package.
 
2013-07-30 03:44:25 AM
Mission creep for dildoes.
 
2013-07-30 03:49:03 AM
Wasn't someone lobbying to make hotdogs a different shape a while back? You know, for the kids.
 
2013-07-30 03:50:30 AM
To be fair I can see the logic behind it but it's still stupid and ineffectual. Kids can choke on a small piece of food just as easily as a big one. So can adults. Sadly this is one of those cases where well-meaning medical professionals are trying to save children from bad luck and/or negligent parents who don't cut food up for their kids.

On the other hand, my 3yo does know how to chew his food. He eats coined hot dogs and sausages and full baby carrots and all kinds of other things and has exhibited no tendency to inhale these and choke without apparent intervention of teeth at some point.

So, shrug.
 
Skr
2013-07-30 03:52:08 AM
Can choke on pretty much anything under the right circumstances, kids and adults alike.


/Was going the do some referencing to Game of Thrones but decided against it.
 
2013-07-30 03:53:16 AM
I first misread that as "choking on warning labels on food," and was not surprised. Also, no stupid tag?
 
2013-07-30 03:53:48 AM

FlyingBacon: Well, its hotdogs and look like too many not enough women be trying something they shouldnt.


FTFY

"The hot dog is the perfect size to block the airways, in a young child, so that's why those are much more dangerous foods to give to a child."

Yeah, because you can do hard time for that.

i.imgur.com


/so very, very wrong
//aisle seat, please
///only cargo hold for that? 'Kay
 
2013-07-30 03:55:10 AM
Wait, you can choke on food? to DEATH?!!!!???? Why haven't we banned this dangerous substance which is killing our poor children? Think of the children!
 
2013-07-30 04:04:04 AM
Choking hazard warning labels on food, how the fark did we evolve to this point as a race?  I read warning labels and I realize that humanity must have gotten incredibly stupid since the 20th century because honestly, if we're a race that thinks using a hair dryer in the shower is a good idea and that folding up a stroller before you remove the baby is a decent idea and that we have to have a warning on a pack of peanuts that says "caution: may contain nuts", I have to come to the conclusion that we're getting dumber as a race because if humanity had always been this mind numbingly stupid we would have become an evolutionary dead end.

I blame our sue happy legal system which refuses to make people accountable for their own stupidity.  "I'm suing the bicycle maker because after taking off all the reflectors from my bike and riding at night I was hit by a car, there was no warning telling me that could happen if I removed all the reflectors." Instead of taking up the case, lawyers should be required to punch said person in the face and asking "How stupid are you?"  Same thing with the hair dryer and the shower.  If my wife dies in the morning because she was running late for work and tried to save time by drying her hair in the shower, I shouldn't be able to sue the hair dryer manufacturer because there wasn't a warning label.  People should just come up to me and ask "Imagine how stupid your kids would have been."

I think we should remove the warning labels and hold people accountable to their actions instead of being able to make a payday off a company because "they were never told".  Now, I don't mean every warning label, because there are some that should be there.  Like at restaurants warning that peanut oil might be used for cooking, that's a good warning label.  But if someone loses their hand because they tried to work on a lawn mower while it was running, they shouldn't be able to sue the lawn mower manufacturer, they should be slapped in the back of the head and asked "What made you think that was a good idea dumbass?"  A good warning able is not to point a laser into your eye (some lasers can instantly blind you for life), a warning label that should be removed is "Don't iron clothes while wearing them."  along with "Warning: Poptart will be hot after toasting"  If you are too dumb to realize that your thin ass shirt isn't enough of a protection between your skin and a hot iron, you've earned that iron shaped scar and the humiliation that follows with everyone asking you if you are a retard, though such an action is an insult to retards since they can figure out that hot equals bad.  And with Poptarts and the toaster, again, basic physics should teach you that if it can toast burn bread it can heat up that fruit filling.

If my death is the result of me walking across a bridge used only for trains over a lake 30 feet below, just wide enough for the train and nothing else, a half mile in length, and while I'm on the middle of this bridge, the train comes around the corner and my options are to either dive off the bridge and into the water below (I can't swim) or stand there and get hit by the train and die instantly, I want Fark to post the story with the dumbass tag and I want every farker to call my death a dumbass move and even call me a retard.  I then want the bill for cleaning my remains off the train to be sent to my parents with a letter telling them that they raised a dumbass who died in the fashion most befitting a dumbass.  I don't want anyone to blame the train company or the people who built the bridge, just have people tell the story of the dumbass who died crossing a lake via a bridge for trains and how I died as a warning to others not to do dangerous dumbass things, and post no signs about the danger that lead me to that death.  Just let others look at the situation and ask if crossing that bridge on foot would be a good idea.
 
2013-07-30 04:12:54 AM
If you do that, it's only fair to throw them on Dallas Cowboys helmets too.
 
2013-07-30 04:13:38 AM
Eye-poke warnings on all sticks now!!!! Your Cat Will Eat This And Poop Foam Which Your Dog Will Then Eat And Poop Foam Poop2 on all Nerf products!!!!
 
2013-07-30 04:23:15 AM
YES!
 
2013-07-30 04:23:26 AM
NOM NOM NOM

4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-07-30 04:51:09 AM
WARNING: chew your food.

Haven't parents been telling kids this since the beginning of time? Oh, but if Oscar Meyer tells them it'll stick.
 
2013-07-30 04:51:45 AM

lumiere: What more do you expect from a nation that banned these...

[www.cpsc.gov image 700x725]




Tiny toys hidden in candy? Wow that's asking for trouble
 
2013-07-30 04:54:51 AM

Great Janitor: Amazing words!


That was gorgeous. I laughed until I cried. I give a 10. Hell even the Russian judge is giving it a 9.
 
2013-07-30 05:05:46 AM
farm9.staticflickr.com
 
2013-07-30 05:09:58 AM

Great Janitor: Choking hazard warning labels on food, how the fark did we evolve to this point as a race?
I read warning labels and I realize that humanity must have gotten incredibly stupid since the 20th century because honestly, if we're a race that thinks using a hair dryer in the shower is a good idea and that folding up a stroller before you remove the baby is a decent idea and that we have to have a warning on a pack of peanuts that says "caution: may contain nuts", I have to come to the conclusion that we're getting dumber as a race because if humanity had always been this mind numbingly stupid we would have become an evolutionary dead end.


Take solace in the knowledge that most of the species is not American, and your warning labels aren't global. They are an expression of your local culture, not general human intelligence. Keep in mind that you're a nationality, not a race, and please stop blaming all of humanity for your country's bullshiat.
And try to get out more. There's a whole planet.
 
2013-07-30 05:14:36 AM
Never bet against a dumbass when death is on the line!
 
2013-07-30 05:16:20 AM

Great Janitor: Choking hazard warning labels on food, how the fark did we evolve to this point as a race?  I read warning labels and I realize that humanity must have gotten incredibly stupid since the 20th century because honestly, if we're a race that thinks using a hair dryer in the shower is a good idea and that folding up a stroller before you remove the baby is a decent idea and that we have to have a warning on a pack of peanuts that says "caution: may contain nuts", I have to come to the conclusion that we're getting dumber as a race because if humanity had always been this mind numbingly stupid we would have become an evolutionary dead end.

I blame our sue happy legal system which refuses to make people accountable for their own stupidity.  "I'm suing the bicycle maker because after taking off all the reflectors from my bike and riding at night I was hit by a car, there was no warning telling me that could happen if I removed all the reflectors." Instead of taking up the case, lawyers should be required to punch said person in the face and asking "How stupid are you?"  Same thing with the hair dryer and the shower.  If my wife dies in the morning because she was running late for work and tried to save time by drying her hair in the shower, I shouldn't be able to sue the hair dryer manufacturer because there wasn't a warning label.  People should just come up to me and ask "Imagine how stupid your kids would have been."

I think we should remove the warning labels and hold people accountable to their actions instead of being able to make a payday off a company because "they were never told".  Now, I don't mean every warning label, because there are some that should be there.  Like at restaurants warning that peanut oil might be used for cooking, that's a good warning label.  But if someone loses their hand because they tried to work on a lawn mower while it was running, they shouldn't be able to sue the lawn mower manufacturer, they should be slapped in the back of the he ...


This post contains words that are known to the State of California to cause cancer.
 
2013-07-30 05:19:31 AM
Great Janitor: [bloviating rant]

The choking concern is for small children, numbnuts, not you. And yes, it can be a problem. I'm not saying government mandated warnings are necessary to prevent it (or even especially helpful in that regard), but it's very easy to forget that the windpipe of a toddler is very much smaller than your own, and certain foods that you could effortlessly toss down your great big gullet are just the perfect size to lodge in the airway of a two-year-old.
 
2013-07-30 05:24:23 AM

Dansker: Keep in mind that you're a nationality, not a race, and please stop blaming all of humanity for your country's bullshiat.


At least Americans don't swallow soccer balls:
  http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2253230/Footballs-marked-w arni ng-stating-choking-hazard-according-EU-regulations.html


 
2013-07-30 05:28:11 AM
Split the younglings hotdogs lengthwise before serving. Problem solved.
 
2013-07-30 05:40:38 AM
We have done a great job in this country (of) preventing choking in children on toys

And the country couldn't be more grateful.

www.aceshowbiz.comassets.nydailynews.com
media.avclub.comrack.2.mshcdn.com
livinginatlanta.files.wordpress.comwww.belch.com
 
2013-07-30 05:42:02 AM

brainiac-dumdum: Split the younglings hotdogs lengthwise before serving. Problem solved.


media.townhall.com
 
2013-07-30 06:06:56 AM

GuidoDelConfuso: The choking concern is for small children, numbnuts, not you. And yes, it can be a problem.


And if people, upon learning that children can choke on small parts, still feed their child nuts, which are similarly small and hard, then they are stupid.

I did a clunker rally a few weeks back. Me and 3 friends bought a €500 (maximum allowed budget for the car) pontiac transport because it was cheap and roomy enough to "live" in for a week while we travelled 4000 kilometres. It had a warning label on the door that people should watch out when opening the door because it might hit someone in the head. It was placed on the side, as in the part that isn't visible from either side when the door is closed. Stupid Americans...
 
2013-07-30 06:13:59 AM

DerAppie: GuidoDelConfuso: The choking concern is for small children, numbnuts, not you. And yes, it can be a problem.

And if people, upon learning that children can choke on small parts, still feed their child nuts, which are similarly small and hard, then they are stupid.

I did a clunker rally a few weeks back. Me and 3 friends bought a €500 (maximum allowed budget for the car) pontiac transport because it was cheap and roomy enough to "live" in for a week while we travelled 4000 kilometres. It had a warning label on the door that people should watch out when opening the door because it might hit someone in the head. It was placed on the side, as in the part that isn't visible from either side when the door is closed. Stupid Americans...


While the Pontiac TranSport was indeed made in America, all the safety features were adjusted to suit ECE safety standards.  Maybe the ECE figured on Europeans being smart enough to not sue if they bump their heads while living in a busted-ass minivan.
 
2013-07-30 06:18:45 AM

untaken_name: Dansker: Keep in mind that you're a nationality, not a race, and please stop blaming all of humanity for your country's bullshiat.

At least Americans don't swallow soccer balls:
  http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2253230/Footballs-marked-w arni ng-stating-choking-hazard-according-EU-regulations.html


At least this Dane can legally buy a Kinder Overraskelse, I know that my nationality doesn't equal the entire human species, and I'm smart enough not to believe everything I read in the Daily Mail.
 
2013-07-30 06:22:32 AM
www.pciyes.com
You can choke on anything you put in your mouth.
My in depth report up next
 
2013-07-30 06:29:49 AM

Dansker: At least this Dane can legally buy a Kinder Overraskelse, I know that my nationality doesn't equal the entire human species, and I'm smart enough not to believe everything I read in the Daily Mail.


No, you just believe that what you read in the Fark comments section is indicative of an entire country.
 
2013-07-30 06:39:23 AM

lumiere: What more do you expect from a nation that banned these...


They were banned because there is no English explaining the product and if you didn't already know, you would have no clue unless you spricht Deutsch
 
2013-07-30 06:43:00 AM

thamike: We have done a great job in this country (of) preventing choking in children on toys

And the country couldn't be more grateful.


Two of those are Canadians
 
2013-07-30 06:43:30 AM

DerAppie: GuidoDelConfuso: The choking concern is for small children, numbnuts, not you. And yes, it can be a problem.

And if people, upon learning that children can choke on small parts, still feed their child nuts, which are similarly small and hard, then they are stupid.

I did a clunker rally a few weeks back. Me and 3 friends bought a €500 (maximum allowed budget for the car) pontiac transport because it was cheap and roomy enough to "live" in for a week while we travelled 4000 kilometres. It had a warning label on the door that people should watch out when opening the door because it might hit someone in the head. It was placed on the side, as in the part that isn't visible from either side when the door is closed. Stupid Americans...


Smart. As the person is closing the door on their head the warning label gets bigger.
 
2013-07-30 06:46:56 AM

untaken_name: Dansker: At least this Dane can legally buy a Kinder Overraskelse, I know that my nationality doesn't equal the entire human species, and I'm smart enough not to believe everything I read in the Daily Mail.

No, you just believe that what you read in the Fark comments section is indicative of an entire country.


Settle down, Beavis. I like Americans in general, all I did was agree with your compatriot that the warnings he mentioned in his post are stupid, and then I reminded him that he can't assume the rest of the world is like his local mall.

He is the one who suggests that your society is evidence that humans have become too stupid to live, so shouldn't you turn your rightous indignation in his direction?
 
2013-07-30 06:52:10 AM
The problem with America is stupidity. I'm not saying there should be a capital punishment for stupidity, but why don't we just take the safety labels off of everything and let the problem solve itself? -Anonymous
 
2013-07-30 06:57:54 AM

ransack.: lumiere: What more do you expect from a nation that banned these...

They were banned because there is no English explaining the product and if you didn't already know, you would have no clue unless you spricht Deutsch


They're not German, and they are banned because the US doesn't allow candy with toys inside.
 
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