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(Huffington Post)   Pat Robertson Divides by Zero   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 59
    More: Strange, Pat Robertson, John Aravosis, Bryan Fischer, AMERICAblog, Hindu deities, Christian Broadcasting Network, Alternative Lifestyles, jet aircraft  
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27079 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Jul 2013 at 9:06 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-07-29 08:44:23 PM  
9 votes:
Fun fact: He makes homoerotic transgender fanfic in his spare time under the pen name of Pat Robertsdaughter.
2013-07-29 11:26:49 PM  
7 votes:

ambassador_ahab: Normally I recommend that everyone masturbate furiously.


25.media.tumblr.com
2013-07-29 10:23:15 PM  
7 votes:

tbeatty: "Farklibs apoplectic at concept of hate the sin, love the sinner.  News at 11."


ih0.redbubble.net
2013-07-29 09:10:14 PM  
5 votes:

Lionel Mandrake: Oh, well! Mysterious Way's and all that!!


God made me put that apostrophe there.

Don't you question my faith!
2013-07-29 09:34:37 PM  
4 votes:
imageshack.us
2013-07-29 09:19:37 PM  
4 votes:

Lawnchair: In other words, he sees things exactly like they do in Iran.  Ghey. Cannot abide.  One partner lives as female/male?  Okay.


I, for one, cannot wait for Hedwig and the Angry Inch 2: Trouble in Tehran.
2013-07-29 09:19:03 PM  
4 votes:
Was he in Thailand or Brazil back when Little Pat worked? Maybe he's tasted the delights of tranny tailpipe?
/I don't know about such things
//my friend made me type this
2013-07-29 09:03:04 PM  
4 votes:
"I think there are men who are in a woman's body,"

Sounds like a pretty egregious mistake for God to put a man in a woman's body.

Oh, well!  Mysterious Way's and all that!!

♪♫la-lal-la-la♪♫  Hey, Honey BooBoo's on!!
2013-07-29 08:03:47 PM  
4 votes:
Pat's been watching the pope and realizes people like you more when don't act like a giant douche. He ain't foolin' nobody.
2013-07-29 11:40:50 PM  
3 votes:

tinfoil-hat maggie: /Pansexual is such a nice term but most people don't know it.


i.chzbgr.com

/no?
2013-07-29 09:21:39 PM  
3 votes:
Maybe his Keeper finally died and fell off.

images4.wikia.nocookie.net
2013-07-29 08:49:34 PM  
3 votes:

revrendjim: Granted it gets a little complicated, but how can you be transgender without being in some sense homosexual?


You know, trolling a Sexual Orientation + Sexual Identity + Religious Fundamentalism thread has got to be around a -150,000 handicap.
2013-07-29 08:20:56 PM  
3 votes:

PainInTheASP: "Like someone of the same sex? Fine. Then change."


He's just going after the xbox crowd.
2013-07-30 12:01:17 PM  
2 votes:

codergirl42: FuryOfFirestorm: codergirl42: TheJoe03: codergirl42: Well, my husband is attracted to men and women but he prefers to identify as gay, although I'd consider him straight.

Maybe it's like how American society considers half white and half black people "black".

/is there a "one drop" (no pun intended) rule for sexuality?

Yes, You Can Be A Golden Gay If Youve Never Had Straight sex.

"Gold Star Gays" are gay guys that never had sex with a woman

"Double Gold Star Gays" never had sex with a woman and were born via C-Section.

I'm a Triple Gold Star Gay because in addition to the former and the latter, my mom became a lesbian after I was born. I infected her with my gayness.

Do you feel special?


You mean, beside my usual gay powers which let me set up straight girls with the man of their dreams, make the perfect souffle, pick out the best wine to go with it, and redecorate the most slovenly hovel into a home worthy of the cover of Architectural Digest? No, not really.

But if I mention that I'm a Triple Gold Star Gay at the movie theater, I get a free small soda!
2013-07-30 12:13:43 AM  
2 votes:

tinfoil-hat maggie: /Pansexual is such a nice term but most people don't know it.


liveforfilms.files.wordpress.com
2013-07-29 11:35:10 PM  
2 votes:

TheJoe03: 25.media.tumblr.com


That was a hilarious skit...

"I'm gonna masturbate and think about you and there's nothing you can do about it"
2013-07-29 10:45:30 PM  
2 votes:
Better watch your ass, Pat...

i1121.photobucket.com

JK!

Even God commanded His People to do some weenie whackin'.

It's all cool.
2013-07-29 10:25:09 PM  
2 votes:
When I was a little kid, I was stuck at my fundie grandmother's house, and this guy was on TV.  They were having some lively discussion about how the decline of America was totally due to minorities, when Pat fell asleep.  The lady with the poodle hair finally noticed, and nudged him awake.

He came to with a start, and hollered, "I REMEMBER WHEN ROCKS WAS MONEY."
2013-07-29 10:08:16 PM  
2 votes:
It's Pat!
2013-07-29 10:00:18 PM  
2 votes:

profplump: Now if only we were legally allowed to change our height. Oh wait, we are, because height isn't an attribute the government/society finds relevant to the way we are expected to treat people. The whole idea that there's any need to officially put people into box A or box B based on the conditions of their birth is ridiculous and essentially guarantees discrimination based on that label.


i.imgur.com
2013-07-29 09:59:59 PM  
2 votes:
www.perditionreport.com
2013-07-29 09:36:38 PM  
2 votes:
Secretly, he calls himself Patricia.
2013-07-29 09:08:57 PM  
2 votes:
In other words, he sees things exactly like they do in Iran.  Ghey. Cannot abide.  One partner lives as female/male?  Okay.
2013-07-29 08:57:57 PM  
2 votes:
Pat Robertson IS a zero.
2013-07-29 08:55:39 PM  
2 votes:
He must have a family member who's transgendered. That or he had a stroke, either can explain that shocking episode of tolerance and rationality.
2013-07-29 08:38:58 PM  
2 votes:
Well if you're one gender one minute, another gender the next, as long as there's no homo-shenanigans in between, I suppose it's all good.
2013-07-30 04:00:20 AM  
1 votes:

TheJoe03: tbeatty: Not at all.  Who you stroke to soak the floor is your business.  Nothing wrong with it.  Your parents might still love you when you come out.  Just thought you should know before the engagement and introductions.  "We met in prison" isn't going to fool many people so you should be prepared when you try to explain it's a vag that makes your needle smell funny (and not the good funny).

Again, how did you turn a conversation about female ejaculation into one about male prison sex? Stop projecting so much.

/still not even sure how a male can squirt, you must jizz like crazy.


When a male engages in prostate play, sometimes it can cause ejaculation just from prostate stimulation. Sounds like he required full penetration, not just analingius.
2013-07-30 01:34:01 AM  
1 votes:
Dear Pat Robertson,

Go into the light already you stupid fark.

Sincerely,

Me
2013-07-30 01:33:07 AM  
1 votes:

codergirl42: TheJoe03: codergirl42: Well, my husband is attracted to men and women but he prefers to identify as gay, although I'd consider him straight.

Maybe it's like how American society considers half white and half black people "black".

/is there a "one drop" (no pun intended) rule for sexuality?

Yes, You Can Be A Golden Gay If Youve Never Had Straight sex.


"Gold Star Gays" are gay guys that never had sex with a woman

"Double Gold Star Gays" never had sex with a woman and were born via C-Section.

I'm a Triple Gold Star Gay because in addition to the former and the latter, my mom became a lesbian after I was born. I infected her with my gayness.
2013-07-30 01:00:54 AM  
1 votes:

tbeatty: They are called "men".  Just so you know.


You're just mad that your needle dick never made a woman squirt.
2013-07-30 12:24:04 AM  
1 votes:
Well, he is named Pat

spunfull.files.wordpress.com
2013-07-30 12:07:05 AM  
1 votes:
Really, I'm the first with the pic? 2.bp.blogspot.com
2013-07-29 11:26:44 PM  
1 votes:

Inchoate: Pat Robertson has gone to plaid. That or he's playing an elaborate game of human-compassion chicken with Pope Francis.


This has all been a long-con so that Pat Robertson can become a woman and smoke pot legally with Pope Francis while they oversee a foundation of South American orphanages and halfway houses.

/it all makes so much sense now
2013-07-29 11:22:59 PM  
1 votes:
Pat Robertson has gone to plaid. That or he's playing an elaborate game of human-compassion chicken with Pope Francis.
2013-07-29 11:22:14 PM  
1 votes:

ambassador_ahab: Normally I recommend that everyone masturbate furiously.



Stroke 'em if ya got em'.
2013-07-29 11:09:23 PM  
1 votes:
Blind nut finds squirrel?
2013-07-29 10:38:57 PM  
1 votes:

Lionel Mandrake: "I think there are men who are in a woman's body,"

Sounds like a pretty egregious mistake for God to put a man in a woman's body.

Oh, well!  Mysterious Way's and all that!!

♪♫la-lal-la-la♪♫  Hey, Honey BooBoo's on!!


Well, this man has often been in a woman's body, if you know what I mean (and I'm pretty sure that you do.)

/bad joke
//apologies
///didn't read entire thread
////probably already been done
2013-07-29 10:28:14 PM  
1 votes:
I clicked on that thinking nothing Pat Robertson says would surprise me...and then I was surprised.

Good to know that's not a sin - not that I'll be trying it anytime soon.
2013-07-29 10:24:39 PM  
1 votes:

Marine1: not sure why he's making statements about Phil Collins' work...


www.clickorlando.com


Do you like phil collins?

Been a big Genesis fan, ever since the release of their 1980 album, Duke.

Before that I didn't really understand any of their work, it was too artsy, too intellectual...it was on Duke where Phil Collins presence became more apparent.
I think Invisible Touch is the group's undisputed masterpiece, its an epic meditation on intangibility at the same time it deepens and enriches the meaning of the preceding 3 albums...

Christy, take off the robe...

Listen to the brilliant ensemble playing of Banks, Collins and Rutherford you can practically hear every nuance of every instrument,

Sabrina...remove your dress,

In terms of lyrical craftsmanship and sheer songwriting, this album hits a new peak of professionalism,

Sabrina why don't you uh, dance a little...

Take the lyrics to "Land of Confusion", in this song, Phil Collins addresses the problems of abusive political authority. In Too Deep is the most moving pop song of the 1980's, about monogamy and commitment, the song is extremely uplifting...their lyrics are as positive and affirmative as uh, anything I've heard in rock...

Christy, get down on your knees so Sabrina can see your ass....

Phil Collins solo career, it seems to be more commercial and therefore more satisfying in a narrower way.

Especially songs like, In The Air Tonight and Against All Odds...

Sabrina, don't just stare at it, eat it!

I also think, Phil Collins works best within the confines of the group than as a solo artist, and I stress the word artist.
This is Sussudio, great, great song...personal favorite.
2013-07-29 10:23:20 PM  
1 votes:
If a god was real, Pat would've exploded in the womb.
2013-07-29 10:16:54 PM  
1 votes:
"Farklibs apoplectic at concept of hate the sin, love the sinner.  News at 11."
2013-07-29 10:11:25 PM  
1 votes:
He probably thinks the reproductive organs work in the new gender, and only XXs with a weener or XYs with a baby factory get trans-surgicaled. So *snip* now it's all the way things were meant to be and they can have all the Jesus babies that Jesus Jesused up at the time of Jesus creation.

/you all think I'm kidding
2013-07-29 10:09:39 PM  
1 votes:
1.  He's finally afraid that all the asshole things he's said during his money-grubbing asshole career are going to piss god off when he dies real soon, so Pat's trying to be more christ-like here at the end.
---or---
2.  He's exhibiting dementia/Alzheimers/stroke

After my asshole grandfather had a stroke he became an actually enjoyable person, so I'm going with number 2.
2013-07-29 10:09:37 PM  
1 votes:

TheJoe03: First weed and now this? Good shiat.


Don't forget "Genesis isn't a science book".

/not sure why he's making statements about Phil Collins' work...
2013-07-29 10:04:55 PM  
1 votes:
Pat's #1 donor juliacomedy.com  died over the weekend
so, we'll likely see the true Pat emerge

/he'll be wearing a cock-ring by Thursday
2013-07-29 10:00:28 PM  
1 votes:

Xanadone: I think Robertson's been kidnapped by aliens and replaced with a look-a-like.  The idea that Pat would say something somewhat sane and humane on this subject just doesn't compute.


And back at the alien's HQ, they have the real Pat tied to a chair viewing the results on a monitor and getting more and more pissed off while the aliens are harvesting the energy from his anger for sustenance.

/I think that was the plot of a Star Trek episode.
2013-07-29 09:59:49 PM  
1 votes:

Xanadone: I think Robertson's been kidnapped by aliens and replaced with a look-a-like.  The idea that Pat would say something somewhat sane and humane on this subject just doesn't compute.


He's been having these odd revelations for a while now. First he said Marijuana was ok and should be legalized and then someone wrote into his show asking his opinion on oral sex. His woman co-star seemed embarrassed but he seemed shocked that anyone would even bother asking. He said whatever happens in the bedroom of married adults is just fine.
2013-07-29 09:39:25 PM  
1 votes:
I was going to form an opinion on this,  but I was overcome with the absurdity of the whole thing.

A large number of people believe in an invisible man in the sky.

One sub-group of these people have a hundred versions of a book of rules that maybe 1% of them have read, and that exactly 0% of them obey.

One guy out of this one sub-group has an opinion as to whether or not something is against said rules.

I'm not sure exactly where the "Who Gives A shiat" demarcation is for y'all, but I hit it on the first bullet point there.
2013-07-29 09:36:31 PM  
1 votes:
He's playing the classic 'Duck Season/Rabbit Season' gambit. He's waiting for the LGBLTs to say ' Nuh-uh- Transgenders are totally sinful!' then he'll say 'Gotcha!' and he wins forever.
2013-07-29 09:33:33 PM  
1 votes:

Cyno01: If you want people to stop equating gender identity with sexuality, then maybe the lgbtqcbbqasdf community or whatever acronym they're using for themselves this week should split.


People who are being discriminated against stick together. Imagine that.?

It's almost as if people shouldn't be complacent with idiots who have nothing but bad intentions in mind for them.
2013-07-29 09:33:22 PM  
1 votes:
i.imgur.com
2013-07-29 09:28:41 PM  
1 votes:
thebarkingatheist.files.wordpress.com
2013-07-29 09:26:21 PM  
1 votes:
as a complete aside, i wonder why this has more "jet aircraft" as a tagline.
2013-07-29 09:18:09 PM  
1 votes:
I think the only reason why he's ok with it is because apparently, transsexuals found a loophole in the bible, so he's cool with that.
2013-07-29 09:15:48 PM  
1 votes:

bmihura: I like that line of thinking.


Even then, it would not stop the religious right in America from discriminating against people for their sexuality or gender issues, or even just being a little more masculine or feminine from the norm for their gender.  You see, the Religious Right does not believe anyone did not have a choice to do this. They CHOOSE to be transgendered. They choose to be gay/lesbian. It's a "lifestyle". That's how they justify their actions to their conscience at night.
2013-07-29 09:15:05 PM  
1 votes:
I think Robertson's been kidnapped by aliens and replaced with a look-a-like.  The idea that Pat would say something somewhat sane and humane on this subject just doesn't compute.
2013-07-29 09:14:35 PM  
1 votes:
This is just Pat Robertson becoming senile.

YOu know how your gramps becomes a raging racist in his old age, but you have no clue where it came from? This is what's going on, but the opposite for Pat
2013-07-29 09:10:09 PM  
1 votes:
Everything I don't do is a sin and worthy of judgment.

Vegetarianism?  Going to hell.

Gimme that job!
2013-07-29 08:09:53 PM  
1 votes:
I don't think there's any sin associated with that. I don't condemn somebody for doing that."


You know Pat...I don't give a flying fark at rolling doughnut what you think, as if your an arbertrator of what's sin or not. That ego you have..that even to make what you "Think" is sin or not is amazingly self-serving.
Especially when it's not your place to "Condemn somebody for doing that"...HELLO..you can't do that unless you think farken GOD---asshole.
 
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