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(CF News 13)   No matter how annoyed you get with self-righteous bicyclists, you can't just shoot and kill them   (cfnews13.com) divider line 367
    More: Florida, Orlando Regional Medical Center, daylight, Orange Blossom Trail  
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9152 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Jul 2013 at 5:16 AM (37 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-07-28 11:10:26 PM
Oh yes you can if your aim is good enough.

Maybe not legally but...
 
2013-07-28 11:16:07 PM
Why are Americans such assholes about bikes?

The people on the bike are douchey to cars and pedestrians.

The people in the cars are douchey to bikes and pedestrians.

The people on foot are douchey to cars and bikes.


We all gotta get where we're going. Be considerate and help traffic flow.
 
2013-07-28 11:24:54 PM
Oh wait, it's between MLK and 25th on guadalupe.  I was looking at a cropped map, found a better one.
 
2013-07-29 12:25:58 AM

doglover: Why are Americans such assholes about bikes?

The people on the bike are douchey to cars and pedestrians.

The people in the cars are douchey to bikes and pedestrians.

The people on foot are douchey to cars and bikes.


We all gotta get where we're going. Be considerate and help traffic flow.


Yeah your right but somehow some of them take it to a new, hipster level of douchy.
 
2013-07-29 12:28:12 AM
i977.photobucket.com
 
2013-07-29 12:31:34 AM
Of course not. Bicycle season starts in October.
 
2013-07-29 12:40:35 AM
Yet.
 
2013-07-29 12:53:41 AM
Depends on what you shoot them with. I believe that crossbows and harpoon guns are legal for that purpose. Molotov cocktails are also okay, but of course you throw those... that's not shooting.
 
2013-07-29 05:18:51 AM
Seriously. Cagers are the greatest danger to road safety.
 
2013-07-29 05:19:02 AM
Damn, I never get to have any fun.
 
2013-07-29 05:21:33 AM
That's why you string fishing line across the street at neck level.
 
2013-07-29 05:22:58 AM
I wouldn't shoot one.  But I am currently shopping for a Brush Guard.

/exemption for permitted events.
 
2013-07-29 05:23:09 AM
Har har har. Murder is so funny.

Isn't it bad enough that if you're not trying to kill us by hitting us with your vehicle that you're poisoning us with your exhaust?
 
2013-07-29 05:26:53 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: Har har har. Murder is so funny.

Isn't it bad enough that if you're not trying to kill us by hitting us with your vehicle that you're poisoning us with your exhaust?





Cry me a river.
 
2013-07-29 05:30:53 AM
Bikes are great, just make them legally equal to the bugs stuck in my radiator and traffic will be fine.  People hate them because they fark up traffic, they fark up traffic because people are deathly afraid of hurting a cyclist (this applies to bikers as well, only difference is i would feel bad about running down a cyclist) and therefore will not pass.
 
2013-07-29 05:31:27 AM
If you are riding your bike in the middle of a traffic lane on a busy city street in a 35 or 40 mph zone and you are blocking the whole city from getting around you, then yeah we're going to have to shelve this "Share the road" BS and we're going to hurl some epithets at you as we pass you.

/Douchey cyclists are a special breed in the PacNW

//Slower traffic should always stay to the right.

///amirite?
 
2013-07-29 05:31:59 AM
I wonder if the bicyclist was black?

/C'mon Florida... double down!
 
2013-07-29 05:32:53 AM

acefox1: If you are riding your bike in the middle of a traffic lane on a busy city street in a 35 or 40 mph zone and you are blocking the whole city from getting around you, then yeah we're going to have to shelve this "Share the road" BS and we're going to hurl some epithets at you as we pass you.

/Douchey cyclists are a special breed in the PacNW

//Slower traffic should always stay to the right.

///amirite?


Another enlightened cager with no concept of courteous driving nor the rules of the road.
 
2013-07-29 05:33:58 AM
Come on Florida. Are you TRYING to be the laughing stock of the U-

Wait. Nevermind. Answered my own question.

/seriously? No. You can't shoot the bike guy for being a douchebag.
 
2013-07-29 05:35:42 AM
Stand your lane.
 
2013-07-29 05:37:36 AM
I hit one with my front bumper once. Got away with it, too. It was oddly fulfilling.

Guy saw the stickers on my truck, decided he was going to save the world for Gaia and the freedom of brown people or something, cut in front of me, and squatted. Through three red lights. Refused to move. So, on the green light following red light 3, I just eased forward until I sort of came into contact with the bike. And it broke. Wow, are expensive bikes fragile.
 
2013-07-29 05:37:50 AM
good.png
 
2013-07-29 05:39:15 AM
Aw subby you misleading bastard. No spandex or fake wins were involved.
 
2013-07-29 05:40:45 AM
Investigators said that person shot the victim and fled.

Clearly, he was standing his ground. No crime has taken place here.
 
2013-07-29 05:41:13 AM
I've never met a biker that actually knew the actual laws for bicyclists and vehicle traffic and not just the ones they've made up in their heads. At this point I've just assumed they're all special needs and need to be handled with kid gloves and small words they can comprehend.
 
2013-07-29 05:41:40 AM

erewhon: So, on the green light following red light 3, I just eased forward until I sort of came into contact with the bike. And it broke. Wow, are expensive bikes fragile.


Yeah, lightweight materials are easy to break, thanks Rick.

And you saying you intentionally rear-ended a vehicle? Because that makes you a douche, not the other way around.
 
2013-07-29 05:42:46 AM

doglover: We all gotta get where we're going. Be considerate and help traffic flow.


Americans just don't like other people. They just don't. That's why they moved to America in the first place -- to get away from everybody else. It is a nation of leave-me-the-fark-alones and get-the-fark-out-of-my-ways.
 
2013-07-29 05:44:23 AM
Damn.  What color am I going to use for "cyclist douche"?
 
2013-07-29 05:44:25 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: acefox1: If you are riding your bike in the middle of a traffic lane on a busy city street in a 35 or 40 mph zone and you are blocking the whole city from getting around you, then yeah we're going to have to shelve this "Share the road" BS and we're going to hurl some epithets at you as we pass you.

/Douchey cyclists are a special breed in the PacNW

//Slower traffic should always stay to the right.

///amirite?

Another enlightened cager with no concept of courteous driving nor the rules of the road.


Yup, I'm the problem. Not the cyclists going 10-15 mph in the left lane of otherwise smoothly-flowing city traffic blocking everybody behind them.

If I drive my car 10-15 mph in the left lane of traffic you better believe I'm getting a ticket and lots of abuse. Being on a bike doesn't give you a special exemption from common sense or common road-courtesy.

/Have been a cyclist for 30 years.

//Would never ride in the middle of a traffic lane in the city.

///I'm in no hurry to suffer or inflict horrific cycling-related injuries
 
2013-07-29 05:44:32 AM

thisisarepeat: Bikes are great, just make them legally equal to the bugs stuck in my radiator and traffic will be fine.  People hate them because they fark up traffic, they fark up traffic because people are deathly afraid of hurting a cyclist (this applies to bikers as well, only difference is i would feel bad about running down a cyclist) and therefore will not pass.


fark up traffic?  Unless you are stuck in the middle of a CM ride, the roads are clogged with motorized vehicles.  Most higher speed roads have shoulders that a sane cyclist can ride on.  If it doesn't, chances are the speed limit isn't that high in the first place---- like on a residential street.
 
2013-07-29 05:46:28 AM

Person: I've never met a biker that actually knew the actual laws for bicyclists and vehicle traffic and not just the ones they've made up in their heads. At this point I've just assumed they're all special needs and need to be handled with kid gloves and small words they can comprehend.


I knew all the laws for the state, city, and campus I used to commute in using a bike. Here's the thing: the laws weren't designed with cyclists in mind.

If I'm stopped at a red light, and there's no cross-traffic, I'm going to run the red light. Because idiots in their huge SUVs texting their BFF Jill are often finishing up their text and start accelerating while still typing when they see a green light out of the corner of their eye, without regard to what's in front of them. It's better for me if I'm already at my max speed and half-way down the block.

Spend some time in the saddle, and you'll understand the difference between theory and practice.
 
2013-07-29 05:46:41 AM

Ishkur: doglover: We all gotta get where we're going. Be considerate and help traffic flow.

Americans just don't like other people. They just don't. That's why they moved to America in the first place -- to get away from everybody else. It is a nation of leave-me-the-fark-alones and get-the-fark-out-of-my-ways.


YUP
 
2013-07-29 05:46:46 AM

filter: thisisarepeat: Bikes are great, just make them legally equal to the bugs stuck in my radiator and traffic will be fine.  People hate them because they fark up traffic, they fark up traffic because people are deathly afraid of hurting a cyclist (this applies to bikers as well, only difference is i would feel bad about running down a cyclist) and therefore will not pass.

fark up traffic?  Unless you are stuck in the middle of a CM ride, the roads are clogged with motorized vehicles.  Most higher speed roads have shoulders that a sane cyclist can ride on.  If it doesn't, chances are the speed limit isn't that high in the first place---- like on a residential street.


Shoulders are deadly for cyclists. There is garbage, nails, and other debris that can mess a day up.

The road exists for all vehicles. Maybe these angry cagers can learn to leave a bit earlier instead of taking their lack of preparation out on people following the law.
 
2013-07-29 05:47:39 AM

erewhon: I hit one with my front bumper once. Got away with it, too. It was oddly fulfilling.

Guy saw the stickers on my truck, decided he was going to save the world for Gaia and the freedom of brown people or something, cut in front of me, and squatted. Through three red lights. Refused to move. So, on the green light following red light 3, I just eased forward until I sort of came into contact with the bike. And it broke. Wow, are expensive bikes fragile.


Sure. The cyclist was out to get you and you were totally justified in committing a hit and run.

/Edges away nervously
//Doesn't make eye contact
 
2013-07-29 05:48:30 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: Har har har. Murder is so funny.

Isn't it bad enough that if you're not trying to kill us by hitting us with your vehicle that you're poisoning us with your exhaust?


Your bike was delivered by ox cart?
 
2013-07-29 05:49:36 AM

filter: thisisarepeat: Bikes are great, just make them legally equal to the bugs stuck in my radiator and traffic will be fine.  People hate them because they fark up traffic, they fark up traffic because people are deathly afraid of hurting a cyclist (this applies to bikers as well, only difference is i would feel bad about running down a cyclist) and therefore will not pass.

fark up traffic?  Unless you are stuck in the middle of a CM ride, the roads are clogged with motorized vehicles.  Most higher speed roads have shoulders that a sane cyclist can ride on.  If it doesn't, chances are the speed limit isn't that high in the first place---- like on a residential street.


35 MPH   and get there in less than 6 seconds.   Otherwise, you are farking up traffic.
 
2013-07-29 05:50:20 AM
I bike to work and it amazes me what a bunch of jackasses cyclists generally are. The problem is that they just seem to think the rules don't apply to them. Stop sign? That's only for cars, just blow through that shiat. Sidewalk? More like Sidebike amirite? Those stupid pedestrians should just get out of the way!

That is my problem with most cyclists, and I think the reason many people dislike them. It isn't that they do stupid shiat, I mean everyone, cars, pedestrians, etc, does stupid shiat, it is that they seem to feel that none of the rules of the road apply to them. They just do whatever the fark they want, with no consideration for the law.
 
2013-07-29 05:50:30 AM

Sudo_Make_Me_A_Sandwich: erewhon: So, on the green light following red light 3, I just eased forward until I sort of came into contact with the bike. And it broke. Wow, are expensive bikes fragile.

Yeah, lightweight materials are easy to break, thanks Rick.

And you saying you intentionally rear-ended a vehicle? Because that makes you a douche, not the other way around.


It's possible. It was early morning, I had to be at work, he decided he was going to block me by getting in front of me and backing until he was nearly touching me. And then despite my pleas for him to get the fark out of my way, just said he wasn't going to let me move. I couldn't go forward, I couldn't go backward, because someone was behind me by then.

I guess in my head I thought I could roll him forward if I nudged him very slowly until he was in the intersection at which point he'd have to decide to get hit or stay put, but the physics of nudging a bike are quite different than I was visualizing. Instead of rolling, they sort of roll forward, but the bumper, instead of rolling them, rides up on the tire. Until you reach a point where the downward weight vector exceeds the wheel's weight limit. At which point the wheel crushes. That point happens in about half a second, sadly enough.
 
2013-07-29 05:52:19 AM

Wanebo: Oh yes you can if your aim is good enough.

Maybe not legally but...


Ahem. This was Florida. As long as it was a fatal shooting, it's legal.
 
2013-07-29 05:52:52 AM
Today I was crossing a busy Manhattan street with a walk, and a biker blew through a red light and almost hit me.

I yelled "asshole" and he flipped me off.

Needless to say, I am getting kick out of this thread.
 
2013-07-29 05:53:04 AM
'Round these parts there are signs with a picture  of a bike and car side-by-side on all the rural roads SHARE THE ROAD.

But neither the cyclists, who like to ride side-by-side on the winding 2-lane highways nor the redneck motorists who try to see how close they can pass the bikes seem to understand what this this sign means.

There's plenty of stupidity all around.
 
2013-07-29 05:53:47 AM
DesktopHippie:
Sure. The cyclist was out to get you and you were totally justified in committing a hit and run.

/Edges away nervously
//Doesn't make eye contact


No, I called a cop and waited. Once he heard the bicyclist out, he told me to go and wrote up the bicyclist. No 'run' to it. It did help a lot that the guy on the bike sort of detonated and went off on a long tirade on why he'd done it and confessed that he had intentionally blocked me. Had he just said I'd hit him while waiting for the light to change, it would have been his word against mine and the guy behind me.
 
2013-07-29 05:56:15 AM
Ah the which 'old road users are the biggest cockbags' debate

t1.gstatic.com
 
2013-07-29 05:56:16 AM

DesktopHippie: erewhon: I hit one with my front bumper once. Got away with it, too. It was oddly fulfilling.

Guy saw the stickers on my truck, decided he was going to save the world for Gaia and the freedom of brown people or something, cut in front of me, and squatted. Through three red lights. Refused to move. So, on the green light following red light 3, I just eased forward until I sort of came into contact with the bike. And it broke. Wow, are expensive bikes fragile.

Sure. The cyclist was out to get you and you were totally justified in committing a hit and run.

/Edges away nervously
//Doesn't make eye contact


Its on my bucket list.  Right between "Manufacture miniature boot for meter maid cart" and "kick over fat lady on scooter in wal-mart"
 
2013-07-29 05:57:08 AM
In before some idiot uses the word "cager".

AverageAmericanGuy: Seriously. Cagers are the greatest danger to road safety.


shiat, nevermind.
 
2013-07-29 05:58:11 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: Seriously. Cagers are the greatest danger to road safety.


AverageAmericanGuy: Har har har. Murder is so funny.

Isn't it bad enough that if you're not trying to kill us by hitting us with your vehicle that you're poisoning us with your exhaust?


AverageAmericanGuy: Another enlightened cager with no concept of courteous driving nor the rules of the road.


AverageAmericanGuy: Shoulders are deadly for cyclists. There is garbage, nails, and other debris that can mess a day up.


AverageAmericanGuy: The road exists for all vehicles. Maybe these angry cagers can learn to leave a bit earlier instead of taking their lack of preparation out on people following the law.


I'm pretty sure AverageAmericanGuy is a compilation of every bicyclist in this video.

/every day, riding the Tour de Fark You
 
2013-07-29 05:58:14 AM
Why the hatred? Car drivers usually just run over motorcyclists and avoid any penalties just by saying "I didn't see 'em" it's us against them brother.
 
2013-07-29 05:59:56 AM
As a delivery driver for Pizza Hut I've found that bicyclists will take every opportunity to interfere with motor vehicle traffic.

Shoot the lot, I say.
 
2013-07-29 06:00:38 AM

freddie freeloader: In before some idiot uses the word "cager".

AverageAmericanGuy: Seriously. Cagers are the greatest danger to road safety.

shiat, nevermind.


I assume they are referring to the faraday cage effect that the metal shell of a car or truck creates as cages typically don't have wheels, are not usually waterproof, and are rarely seen doing 70Mph down a highway with a stereo pumping out some schweet choons.
 
2013-07-29 06:01:24 AM

doglover: Why are Americans such assholes about bikes?



Fixed that for you.

When you spend time outside of the U.S., and then come back, you realize how indignant we all get over the most petty shiat imaginable.
 
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