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(Wired)   As Wolverine's new movie opens today, a look back at his last flick that everyone has already forgotten   (wired.com ) divider line
    More: Silly, X-Men Origins, X-Men, roots, The Last Stand, pissing contests, Stryker, First Nations, mst3k  
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3948 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 26 Jul 2013 at 8:38 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-07-26 08:40:33 AM  
I haven't forgotten it subby, it was a horrific mangling of Deadpool.
 
2013-07-26 08:40:59 AM  
I didn't forget it. It is a big reason while I'll wait for home video to watch this one. Jackman has been playing Wolverine for over a decade. Move on.
 
2013-07-26 08:43:19 AM  
Nerds would have loved that movie if they had girlfriends to take to see Hugh Jackman shirtless for two hours.
 
2013-07-26 08:44:16 AM  
I thought the last movie was pretty good, but only if you ignored all previously written material.
 
2013-07-26 08:54:36 AM  
Does anyone really remember what happened in Iron Man 3?
 
2013-07-26 08:59:22 AM  
I thought there might have been another Wolverine movie. However all I remember was thinking about going, and then waking up in a hypnotist's office. What was that all about?
 
2013-07-26 09:06:40 AM  
The preview of the movie left me with the impression that this is a rehash of the third movie's plot. Should Wolverine take the chance to be normal or accept his mutant nature?

He's going to be so traumatized by recent events he'll take the cure. They'll get attacked halfway through the procedure. Weakened Wolverine gets his but kicked. After some soul searching, he will realize his powers are needed. Restored Wolverine has big end fight with big baddie. Credits.


Maybe I'm wrong, but that looked like the very stale plot line they are going with.
 
2013-07-26 09:08:53 AM  

Copperbelly watersnake: Maybe I'm wrong, but that looked like the very stale plot line they are going with.


Hell, in one of the ads they even show him blowing up the head of the big silver guy he is fighting.  Uh...I guess he wins?  Unless that's a false teaser, kinda giving it away there.
 
2013-07-26 09:12:10 AM  

devilEther: Does anyone really remember what happened in Iron Man 3?


Gwyneth Paltrow bared her midriff.
 
2013-07-26 09:13:49 AM  

CarnySaur: devilEther: Does anyone really remember what happened in Iron Man 3?

Gwyneth Paltrow bared her midriff.


I see the important points are all laid out here.
 
2013-07-26 09:14:41 AM  
If he goes no-nose feral at the end, I'll be first in line for the sequel.
 
2013-07-26 09:15:31 AM  
The movie sucked ass but I actually liked Liev Schreiber as Victor Creed.
 
2013-07-26 09:18:04 AM  
Hugh Jackman is terrible in that role. Wolverine is supposed to be an ugly Canuck with the world's worst short-man complex. If they want to make a movie about a quip-spewing, pretty-boy X-Man's tortured past, they should make one about Gambit or Angel.
 
2013-07-26 09:18:27 AM  

CarnySaur: devilEther: Does anyone really remember what happened in Iron Man 3?

Gwyneth Paltrow bared her midriff.


Dude, spoiler alert! I haven't finished watching iron man 2 yet.
 
2013-07-26 09:19:07 AM  
I sure as hell didn't.

/Gambit!
//bring him back, Bryan Singer!
 
2013-07-26 09:27:27 AM  
No matter what they do, no matter how the change the Xman movie universe, one thing they must keep constant....

Will.I.Am must stay dead
 
2013-07-26 09:28:49 AM  

Girion47: I haven't forgotten it subby, it was a horrific mangling of Deadpool.


if they ever actually get to the Deadpool movie, it has to open on his watching that abomination and yelling about how he's nothing like that guy at the end!
 
2013-07-26 09:35:08 AM  
I thought Origins was ok.   It was a pleasant surprise that it wasn't another 'one super, all normal people otherwise' movies.   The casting was adequate.   The story ok--except for the incredibly dumb amnesia hook based on a Six Million Dollar Man premise.   Supporting characters included many "sorry you can't write Wolverine, he's taken--here have a bad Wolverine inspired character instead" characters (Gambit, Deadpool, Sabretooth).

It wasn't another Spiderman or Batman reboot.   I won't sit through any more of those.
 
2013-07-26 09:40:03 AM  
The opening montage during the credits where Logan and his brother were fighting in various wars was pretty cool. I would have liked to have seen more of that than the rest of it.
 
2013-07-26 09:41:34 AM  

Teambaylagoon: The movie sucked ass but I actually liked Liev Schreiber as Victor Creed.


Mugato: The opening montage during the credits where Logan and his brother were fighting in various wars was pretty cool. I would have liked to have seen more of that than the rest of it.


I was going to add something similar.
 
2013-07-26 09:44:27 AM  

Mugato: The opening montage during the credits where Logan and his brother were fighting in various wars was pretty cool. I would have liked to have seen more of that than the rest of it.


This, would have been happier had they ditched the brother thing made it into a friends for life sorta deal because of young tragedy and then focused on their lives up to their parting as enemies.
 
2013-07-26 09:44:39 AM  
The movie was incredibly terrible.  There's almost no redeeming value to it, and it clearly no longer fits into any version of the movie continuity.

That said, the author of the article got one thing wrong - Merry the hobbit was supposed to be in Springfield, Ohio, which looks absolutely nothing like where they shot the scenes, and has no permanent circus/carnival.  It did, however, tickle me that it was basically my home town in a movie.
 
2013-07-26 09:44:45 AM  

ManateeGag: Girion47: I haven't forgotten it subby, it was a horrific mangling of Deadpool.

if they ever actually get to the Deadpool movie, it has to open on his watching that abomination and yelling about how he's nothing like that guy at the end!


And then he spends first five minutes of the movie hunting down the writer who is responsible and blowing him up. Bonus: they get the real writer to play the part.

Only Deadpool fans will see the movie, so give them what they want.
 
2013-07-26 09:55:02 AM  

Decillion: And then he spends first five minutes of the movie hunting down the writer who is responsible and blowing him up. Bonus: they get the real writer to play the part.


I like that idea. Or if you want to keep in line with the movie you can say that closing his mouth (long with the other modifications) lead to his psychotic break. This in turn forced him to create the fantasy of being a comic book character/the voices in his head as a defense mechanism. This would also be used as a reason for him being butt ugly.

But I bet they leave that last part out of the movie. No way they are going to have Ryan covered up the whole movie. The Ryan fangirls are militant.
 
2013-07-26 09:58:29 AM  

Decillion: Only Deadpool fans will see the movie, so give them what they want.


well, if it's Ryan Reynolds, they will hope for all the women moist in the panties for him to go see it too.
 
2013-07-26 10:02:16 AM  

Decillion: And then he spends first five minutes of the movie hunting down the writer who is responsible and blowing him up. Bonus: they get the real writer to play the part.


Hey, one of the writers on the horrible Wolverine movie went on to bring Game of Thrones to television.  Leave him alone, get the other guy!
 
2013-07-26 10:05:31 AM  

devilEther: Does anyone really remember what happened in Iron Man 3?


Yes.
It had a plot where A led to B led to C. And that was awesome.
It had a growth arc for every single character in the thing. That's hard to do. And that made it awesome.
They had him fight a zeitgeist and it was awesome.
They turned memes on their ears and it was awesome.
They tried to stuff Pepper in a fridge and she wouldn't go. And that too was awesome.
The film had a structure that would make a lit major go jelly-kneed. And even that was awesome.

It's kind of like the opposite of Origins:Wolverine.
 
2013-07-26 10:10:33 AM  

ManateeGag: Decillion: Only Deadpool fans will see the movie, so give them what they want.

well, if it's Ryan Reynolds, they will hope for all the women moist in the panties for him to go see it too.


That's unfair.

My panties will also be moist, even though I am not a woman.

// RR fanboi
// also want a GL2
// not gonna see RIPD, though
 
2013-07-26 10:19:38 AM  

Dr Dreidel: // also want a GL2


I enjoyed Green Lantern also. I wonder how much of the budget was spent on Blake Lively's arse? Someone spent hours 3D modeling the perfect back side, and I want to know who. If I kill him, can I have the job?!

Dr Dreidel: // not gonna see RIPD, though


I liked it. Not the greatest movie in history, but it was fun.
 
2013-07-26 10:27:01 AM  

devilEther: Does anyone really remember what happened in Iron Man 3?


His house got blown up.
He hung out with some random kid.
The Mandarin wasn't a cool villain, just a hired actor to play the part to distract people from the real bad guy.
There was a fight with all the suits on autopilot fighting mutants or something, but there was too much CGI going on to really see anything (much like the last 45 minutes of Avengers).
Pepper's bare midriff
Pepper's a mutant now.

Overall, not a great film.  Better than TDKR (but so was XMO:W, barely) or Star Trek into Dorkness, and no where near as good as the first Iron Man.
 
2013-07-26 10:31:19 AM  
The dialogue in Origins was so awful I could predict it coming.

Movie: "We're going to make you indestructible..."
Me: "...but first we have to destroy you?"
Movie: "...but first we have to destroy you."
Me: "WTF!"

/still the worst line ever spoken in any movie, ever
 
2013-07-26 10:31:35 AM  
I thought The Wolverine was awesome. I can only think of a couple of superhero movies that I've enjoyed more.
 
2013-07-26 10:33:43 AM  
So, reboot?
 
2013-07-26 10:37:55 AM  

RatMaster999: devilEther: Does anyone really remember what happened in Iron Man 3?

His house got blown up.
He hung out with some random kid.
The Mandarin wasn't a cool villain, just a hired actor to play the part to distract people from the real bad guy.
There was a fight with all the suits on autopilot fighting mutants or something, but there was too much CGI going on to really see anything (much like the last 45 minutes of Avengers).
Pepper's bare midriff
Pepper's a mutant now.

Overall, not a great film.  Better than TDKR (but so was XMO:W, barely) or Star Trek into Dorkness, and no where near as good as the first Iron Man.


img690.imageshack.us
 
2013-07-26 10:41:19 AM  
I liked X-Men Origins: Wolverine especially Lynn Collins (the older version of Jennifer Lawrence) as Silverfox.
i682.photobucket.com
/can't wait to see The Wolverine
 
2013-07-26 10:41:48 AM  
I think we are forgetting something here though. While the movie was pure shiat, it did at least birth one of the best games based on a movie ever.
 
2013-07-26 10:42:17 AM  

RatMaster999: devilEther: Does anyone really remember what happened in Iron Man 3?


The Mandarin wasn't a cool villain, just a hired actor to play the part to distract people from the real bad guy.
There was a fight with all the suits on autopilot fighting mutants or something, but there was too much CGI going on to really see anything (much like the last 45 minutes of Avengers).


That was my favorite part of IM3. The blurry cgi crap between the henchmen and the drone suits was all in the background. The scene focused on tony and pepper as characters. Way different than hawk guy shooting arrows at blurry aliens.
 
2013-07-26 10:43:21 AM  

Copperbelly watersnake: The preview of the movie left me with the impression that this is a rehash of the third movie's plot. Should Wolverine take the chance to be normal or accept his mutant nature?

He's going to be so traumatized by recent events he'll take the cure. They'll get attacked halfway through the procedure. Weakened Wolverine gets his but kicked. After some soul searching, he will realize his powers are needed. Restored Wolverine has big end fight with big baddie. Credits.


Maybe I'm wrong, but that looked like the very stale plot line they are going with.


I saw that movie - it was called Superman 2.
 
2013-07-26 10:48:43 AM  

IdBeCrazyIf: I think we are forgetting something here though. While the movie was pure shiat, it did at least birth one of the best games based on a movie ever.


I was just wondering last night if there was a modern video game based on a movie that was any good. Wolverine: Origins is (long(ish) single player/storyline? Multiplayer can suck a fark; I don't need it).

// X360
 
2013-07-26 10:49:06 AM  

IdBeCrazyIf: I think we are forgetting something here though. While the movie was pure shiat, it did at least birth one of the best games based on a movie ever.



Since when did we start talking about Spiderman 2?
img29.imageshack.us
 
2013-07-26 10:54:10 AM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Since when did we start talking about Spiderman 2?


Damn that was a fun game, I remember just taking an hour and swinging around.
 
2013-07-26 10:57:49 AM  

IdBeCrazyIf: Mugato: The opening montage during the credits where Logan and his brother were fighting in various wars was pretty cool. I would have liked to have seen more of that than the rest of it.

This, would have been happier had they ditched the brother thing made it into a friends for life sorta deal because of young tragedy and then focused on their lives up to their parting as enemies.


That was probably the best scene out of all X-Men movies. Watching it, I really thought I was in for an amazing ride with Origin. Damn, was I ever disappointed.
 
2013-07-26 11:01:13 AM  
I'm completely over comic book movies. It peaked last year with Avengers and Dark Knight Rises. Now I need about a 3-4 year break.
 
2013-07-26 11:03:43 AM  

INeedAName: I thought there might have been another Wolverine movie. However all I remember was thinking about going, and then waking up in a hypnotist's office. What was that all about?


It was much better than Cats. I am going to see it again and again and again.
 
2013-07-26 11:03:49 AM  
For the fan girls:

img69.imageshack.us

All he needs is a puppy.

IdBeCrazyIf: Damn that was a fun game, I remember just taking an hour and swinging around.


My 8 year old dusted it off and has been playing it lately. It stands up to the test of time. Graphics could use a touch up but the camera, controls and story are great.
 
2013-07-26 11:03:59 AM  

verbaltoxin: I'm completely over comic book movies. It peaked last year with Avengers and Dark Knight Rises. Now I need about a 3-4 year break.


What other kind of movies would you like the cycle to go to?    Frankly, I'm tired of summer blockbuster format movies.
 
2013-07-26 11:04:30 AM  
Magic memory wiping bullets, voiceless Deadpool, and Logan forgets how to check for a pulse. God, what a horrible movie.
 
2013-07-26 11:06:09 AM  

Dr Dreidel: IdBeCrazyIf: I think we are forgetting something here though. While the movie was pure shiat, it did at least birth one of the best games based on a movie ever.

I was just wondering last night if there was a modern video game based on a movie that was any good. Wolverine: Origins is (long(ish) single player/storyline? Multiplayer can suck a fark; I don't need it).

// X360




Someone usually pulls out one or two but I have been saying this is a fact for years and years and years.
 
2013-07-26 11:10:01 AM  

Rhypskallion: verbaltoxin: I'm completely over comic book movies. It peaked last year with Avengers and Dark Knight Rises. Now I need about a 3-4 year break.

What other kind of movies would you like the cycle to go to?    Frankly, I'm tired of summer blockbuster format movies.


In a perfect world, Pacific Rim would've slaughtered Grown Ups 2.

Anyway I miss cerebral, suspenseful films, especially in horror and sci-fi. I heard The Conjuring is like that but it's such a rare thing now. Remakes are far too prevalent in horror and sci-fi is just to comic booky these days. For every "Moon" there's twenty "Oblivions."

I also like neo-noir type stuff. I enjoyed Drive. There's not a whole lot of stuff like that either.

/Talking strictly movies here.
 
2013-07-26 11:10:36 AM  

Herr Morgenstern: Magic memory wiping bullets, voiceless Deadpool, and Logan forgets how to check for a pulse. God, what a horrible movie.


But here is the tragedy, I remember it starting really well. The guy who played Sabertooth was good, Ryan/Deadpool started well, and Jackman was going his normal (good) job with Logan. And then about half way though the movie they decided to see how fast they could crash the project.
 
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