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(Gawker)   "A middle-aged woman found naked outside her apartment with her head stuck in a staircase handrail told police she was having sex with her boyfriend in public" ... "Police noted that alcohol may have played a role in the outcome"   (gawker.com) divider line 50
    More: Amusing, boyfriend in public, staircase handrail, handrail told, handrails, apartments, flights  
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6863 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Jul 2013 at 9:48 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



50 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-07-24 09:48:43 AM
...what, he said "oops" after forgetting to pull out?
 
2013-07-24 09:50:35 AM
Mom?
 
2013-07-24 09:50:45 AM
I can't help but wonder what position they were using.
 
2013-07-24 09:51:11 AM
So he came and went?
Is that what she's trying to say?
 
2013-07-24 09:51:56 AM
She done got railed
 
2013-07-24 09:53:03 AM
He pulled out, she didn't.
 
2013-07-24 09:53:58 AM
There but for the grace of God.
 
2013-07-24 09:54:26 AM

PizzaJedi81: I can't help but wonder what position they were using.


Spindle style?
 
2013-07-24 09:54:54 AM
I'm gonna have to see pictures of her before I can intelligently comment.
 
m00
2013-07-24 09:55:10 AM
"Police noted that alcohol may have played a role in the outcome" 

So she was raped?
 
2013-07-24 09:56:21 AM
I love it when the internet gives me ideas
 
2013-07-24 09:57:04 AM

m00: "Police noted that alcohol may have played a role in the outcome" 

So she was raped?


Nice bait. I am going to see if anyone bites.
 
2013-07-24 09:57:08 AM
This takes submission position to a whole new level.
 
2013-07-24 09:57:36 AM
*scans headline*


25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-07-24 09:57:40 AM
Can't believe I am the first to say it, but...

What's her fark handle?
 
2013-07-24 09:57:48 AM
Doggy style is my guess. My best friend got her hair caught between the waterbed and headboard on a water bed while she was farking doggy style.
 
2013-07-24 09:57:56 AM
What would Amanda Marcotte say about this?
 
2013-07-24 09:58:15 AM
that's not a very nice boyfriend... i mean, he could have at least brought her some clothes before he stole off into the night.
 
2013-07-24 09:58:29 AM

PizzaJedi81: I can't help but wonder what position they were using.


Doggy Styley, I'm guessing, or as we say at my house, "en la mode des chiens". But he must have really been hammering away to drive her head through the railing. Impressive.
 
2013-07-24 09:58:59 AM
If her head was in the handrail, I'd wager some sort of super-science was also involved.
 
2013-07-24 09:59:02 AM
This is why taking the elevator is better.
 
2013-07-24 09:59:15 AM
I suspect surprise buttsecks happend just a split second before her head got stuck in the railing
 
2013-07-24 10:00:05 AM
Someone messed up the hand-off.

Knock Knock!
Who's There?
Yukon!
Yukon Who?
Yukon Jack off if you want too,
me I'm going to the Gangbang...
 
2013-07-24 10:00:47 AM

HotIgneous Intruder: What would Amanda Marcotte say about this?


The answer to that question is always the same: No one farking cares.
 
2013-07-24 10:00:50 AM
The question is though, how does she know it was him.  If her head's stuck, and the person didn't walk down the stairs past her...
 
2013-07-24 10:01:16 AM
Wtf is with the stock photo?  Looks like the headless guy is swallowing the third arm in the pic.

i.imgur.com
 
2013-07-24 10:02:36 AM
I wonder how many times she thought she was about to be rescued only to hear, "Ma'am, this just ain't your day."
 
2013-07-24 10:02:58 AM
When emergency workers arrived at the apartment complex in the western Russia city of Lipetsk last Wednesday night, they were shocked to discover the birthday-suited 46-year-old on all fours, with her head wedged firmly between two bars on the building's stairway railing,but pulled a train on her anyway.
 
PJ-
2013-07-24 10:03:25 AM
'Gah, i'm stuck, help me out here baby!'
'Well, my work is done, i'll be taking a nap, let me know if you need anything'
'I need you to help me get unstuck!'
'I'll call 911 anonymously and say i'm a concerned neighbor'
'Can you get me some clothes to cover myself up?'
'Whoa whoa, one thing at a time!'  *walks off*
 
2013-07-24 10:05:01 AM

Mister Buttons: Wtf is with the stock photo?  Looks like the headless guy is swallowing the third arm in the pic.

[i.imgur.com image 850x478]


It's actually this guy scratching his chin:
theinfosphere.org
 
2013-07-24 10:08:38 AM

pute kisses like a man: that's not a very nice boyfriend... i mean, he could have at least brought her some clothes before he stole off into the night.


I much prefer to finish with her head stuck, then wipe my dick off on her shirt before I steal off into the night
 
m00
2013-07-24 10:14:45 AM

Empty H: Nice bait. I am going to see if anyone bites.


I thought it was pretty obvious, like a meta-troll.  I was just being funny. I think if someone takes THAT bait, they're pretty gullible.
 
2013-07-24 10:17:23 AM
Anybody else think this "boyfriend" was someone she just recently picked up at a bar?  I mean, that has to be the world's shiattiest boyfriend, otherwise.
 
2013-07-24 10:17:49 AM
Could have been worse I guess...

img.metro.co.uk
 
2013-07-24 10:23:46 AM

gnosis301: If her head was in the handrail, I'd wager some sort of super-science was also involved.


Or weird science at least
encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com
Approves
 
2013-07-24 10:25:27 AM
Awww... Baby Jessica is all grown up!
 
2013-07-24 10:26:44 AM
Ive cuffed my GF to the railing in my place before. When she gets back I'll have to jam her head in it instead.
 
2013-07-24 10:31:24 AM

Brick-House: Could have been worse I guess...

[img.metro.co.uk image 636x300]


Don't give shepherds any ideas.
 
2013-07-24 10:31:37 AM

HailRobonia: Mister Buttons: Wtf is with the stock photo?  Looks like the headless guy is swallowing the third arm in the pic.

[i.imgur.com image 850x478]

It's actually this guy scratching his chin:


Have you been waiting long to use that pic?
Or do you make up reasons to?


I seriously can't imagine a person who has a bunch of Futarama pics for different occasions.


/NotSureifSerious
//100CoffeeCups
///oh, Ramadan, give me my caffeine
 
2013-07-24 10:31:47 AM

m00: Empty H: Nice bait. I am going to see if anyone bites.

I thought it was pretty obvious, like a meta-troll.  I was just being funny. I think if someone takes THAT bait, they're pretty gullible.


True. My thought was it would only attract the very angry ones and thus would be a good catch.
 
2013-07-24 10:37:09 AM

Latinwolf: gnosis301: If her head was in the handrail, I'd wager some sort of super-science was also involved.

Or weird science at least
[encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com image 184x274]
Approves



www.weirdscience.net

Mine brings pizza and beer.

/would eat her hotbox, if ya know what I mean, and I think you do.
 
2013-07-24 10:39:30 AM

pute kisses like a man: that's not a very nice boyfriend... i mean, he could have at least brought her some clothes before he stole off into the night.


I'm thinking 'boyfriend' is slang for 'john'
 
2013-07-24 10:39:43 AM
media.tumblr.com
Martin did it!
 
2013-07-24 10:41:53 AM

MutantMotherMouse: pute kisses like a man: that's not a very nice boyfriend... i mean, he could have at least brought her some clothes before he stole off into the night.

I'm thinking 'boyfriend' is slang for 'john'


According to the article it was an abbreviation for "married boyfriend"
 
2013-07-24 10:42:26 AM
"she was on all fours"

Giggity.....
 
2013-07-24 10:44:57 AM
"I don't know! It just seemed like a good idea at the time.  Line starts at the rear."


images.smh.com.au
 
2013-07-24 10:51:59 AM
www.brobible.com
 
2013-07-24 11:12:49 AM
So how many "neighbors stopped by" but didnt call or help.


knowwhatImean
 
2013-07-24 11:22:16 AM
Vodak
 
2013-07-24 01:07:30 PM
I would toe her anus.
 
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