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(Telegraph)   China's new weapon against crime in one of their most volatile regions is....C) Geese   (telegraph.co.uk) divider line 51
    More: Weird, armed police, ethnic violence, Uighurs, Han Chinese, Xinjiang, motorbikes  
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4388 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Jul 2013 at 2:27 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-07-24 12:32:52 AM  
24.media.tumblr.com Geese Howard is no match for the Duck King.25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-07-24 12:56:02 AM  
thank gawd this important thread was greenlighted


/by some discerning unbiased mod I'm sure
 
2013-07-24 02:29:59 AM  
Geese are pretty potent foes, I know so from nearly having an arm broken by one.

Also: Top Gun
 
2013-07-24 02:31:21 AM  
Oh, wait.  Mis-read that as "cheese."

OK, carry on.
 
2013-07-24 02:33:08 AM  

TheTurtle: Oh, wait.  Mis-read that as "cheese."

OK, carry on.


Cheese would also be a potent security system. One sniff at ranky stuff and the villains would run away from the god-awful odor. Unless they can't smell of course.
 
2013-07-24 02:33:41 AM  
I suppose In for the Goose, in for the Gander is appropriate policy now?
 
2013-07-24 02:33:42 AM  
m8.i.pbase.com
 
2013-07-24 02:35:52 AM  

gravebayne2: [m8.i.pbase.com image 739x800]


WTF does its tongue have barbs?! Which unholy God has the geese as its animal so I can avoid it like the real thing?
 
2013-07-24 02:37:04 AM  

Fano: Geese are pretty potent foes, I know so from nearly having an arm broken by one.

Also: Top Gun


i46.tinypic.com
 
2013-07-24 02:37:37 AM  
It's China. They figure the geese have less chance of being eaten by their handlers than the dogs.
 
2013-07-24 02:38:46 AM  
The geese fanned their wings and began shrieking when they saw the stranger. The duty officer woke up ...
 
2013-07-24 02:39:08 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-07-24 02:40:35 AM  

Maggie_Luna: gravebayne2: [m8.i.pbase.com image 739x800]

WTF does its tongue have barbs?! Which unholy God has the geese as its animal so I can avoid it like the real thing?


I'm guessing the answer to the first question is "fark you, that's why." and the answer to the second, apparently Geb from Egyptian Mythos:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Geb
 
2013-07-24 02:40:40 AM  
I'm still not drinking my Coke, you sons of biatches.
 
2013-07-24 02:42:04 AM  
I have to wonder what google thinks of my googling "Goose God".
 
2013-07-24 02:46:26 AM  

Alonjar: Fano: Geese are pretty potent foes, I know so from nearly having an arm broken by one.

Also: Top Gun


Wait for it
 
2013-07-24 02:52:58 AM  
I can somewhat see the utility, but if poison steak is in the arsenal to deal with dogs, poisoned bread will handle a flock of geese just as easy.  If they are using them as a poor mans alarm system, why not go to guinea hens.  Those suckers are loud and react to any disturbance.  Also, as they are smaller, you don't need to provide quite as much food.  Of course the same basic problem as geese is your alarm system may turn into a persons dinner.
 
2013-07-24 03:01:13 AM  

Daedalus27: I can somewhat see the utility, but if poison steak is in the arsenal to deal with dogs, poisoned bread will handle a flock of geese just as easy.  If they are using them as a poor mans alarm system, why not go to guinea hens.  Those suckers are loud and react to any disturbance.  Also, as they are smaller, you don't need to provide quite as much food.  Of course the same basic problem as geese is your alarm system may turn into a persons dinner.


I'm sure the dogs would end up that way as well.
 
2013-07-24 03:01:31 AM  
FTFA: In June, one gaggle of police geese reportedly managed to snare a man who had broken into the local police headquarters to take a motorbike, the People's Daily reported.

I would think that the local police headquarters would have something more effective than geese to repel criminals..... like say.... police.
 
2013-07-24 03:01:44 AM  
Every farking day for 1/2 the summer...


So.. You want to go to the park and enjoy the day..

media.tumblr.com


Oh so you want to hike the nature trail too?

3.bp.blogspot.com

/Canadian geese are the bane of my existence
/most mean spirited piece of shiat birds every invented
 
2013-07-24 03:04:51 AM  
The Romans used them.
 
2013-07-24 03:04:56 AM  

Arthur Jumbles: FTFA: In June, one gaggle of police geese reportedly managed to snare a man who had broken into the local police headquarters to take a motorbike, the People's Daily reported.

I would think that the local police headquarters would have something more effective than geese to repel criminals..... like say.... police.


I'd like to know how the gaggle of police geese cuffed the suspect.
 
2013-07-24 03:07:54 AM  

Carballo13: The Romans used them.


Yeah. They conquered France with them.
 
2013-07-24 03:07:59 AM  
Wait for it
 
2013-07-24 03:14:52 AM  

Danger Avoid Death: Carballo13: The Romans used them.

Yeah. They conquered France with them.


Those were swallows.
 
2013-07-24 03:19:39 AM  

Gyrfalcon: Danger Avoid Death: Carballo13: The Romans used them.

Yeah. They conquered France with them.

Those were swallows.


African or European?
 
2013-07-24 03:31:37 AM  
And when the guards get bored they can just juggle the geese's young.

/Tradition had to get started somewhere
 
2013-07-24 03:55:13 AM  
I AM BLOOD

I AM VENGEANCE

I RAIN PECKS UPON YOU ALLLLLLLLLLL
 
2013-07-24 03:57:02 AM  

Gyrfalcon: Danger Avoid Death: Carballo13: The Romans used them.

Yeah. They conquered France with them.

Those were swallows.


No, those came after the conqueriing.

lh3.ggpht.com


/and spanking
//and leg & armpit shaving, one hopes
///bath wouldn't hurt
////just sayin'
 
2013-07-24 04:00:12 AM  

gravebayne2: [m8.i.pbase.com image 739x800]


"Geese is the word, is the word, is the word..."
 
2013-07-24 04:01:02 AM  

Danger Avoid Death: Gyrfalcon: Danger Avoid Death: Carballo13: The Romans used them.

Yeah. They conquered France with them.

Those were swallows.

African or European?


How should I know AIIIIEEEEEEEEEEE....
 
2013-07-24 04:01:49 AM  

styckx: Every farking day for 1/2 the summer...


So.. You want to go to the park and enjoy the day..

[media.tumblr.com image 500x350]


Oh so you want to hike the nature trail too?

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 850x637]

/Canadian geese are the bane of my existence
/most mean spirited piece of shiat birds every invented


Frickin' honkies...
 
2013-07-24 04:06:39 AM  
This is not a repeat from 390 or 387 BC
 
2013-07-24 04:36:56 AM  

styckx: Every farking day for 1/2 the summer...


So.. You want to go to the park and enjoy the day..

[media.tumblr.com image 500x350]


Oh so you want to hike the nature trail too?

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 850x637]

/Canadian geese are the bane of my existence
/most mean spirited piece of shiat birds every invented


Those Loring Park geese are farking mean; evil-tempered feathery threadpath-shiatting dinosaurs. Glad they tend to collect on your side of town, frankly.

See also: Indiana Jones & The Last Crusade
 
2013-07-24 07:15:41 AM  
A farmer in a small town in my area me has guard geese. They are more intimidating than dogs for most people.
 
2013-07-24 07:49:53 AM  
hate 'em.

Poop factories, add nothing to the environment but poop.


is this thread a continuation of yesterday's Goose thread?

Cause I still hate 'em, like I did yesterday.
or should I copy/paste commentary from the last thread on Geese?//
Need instructions or directions on this//1//
like the Balls / Slat Conundrum Need advice//
 
2013-07-24 08:36:39 AM  

Marcintosh: hate 'em.

Poop factories, add nothing to the environment but poop.


Came here to say this -- the local sanitation workers are probably ready to riot.
 
2013-07-24 09:02:32 AM  
Having been to China, I always thought thier most effective tool against crime was execution... and the complete ease with which they apply it.

/only country I know that celebrates antidrug day with a mass execution.
 
2013-07-24 09:15:08 AM  
"Let my armies be the rocks and the trees and the birds in the sky."

also

"we named the dog Indiana"
 
2013-07-24 10:09:13 AM  

TrainingWheelsNeeded: "Let my armies be the rocks and the trees and the birds in the sky."

also

"we named the dog Indiana"


Mystery from that movie: when they get out of the underground tomb of the crusader in Venice, they come up through a manhole 50 feet away from the library. What the hell? I thought this tomb was supposed to be a hidden secret, not something Eduardo Norton has access to.
 
2013-07-24 10:29:54 AM  

staplermofo: [24.media.tumblr.com image 86x117] Geese Howard is no match for the Duck King.[25.media.tumblr.com image 164x97]


I'm glad I'm not the only one who instantly thought of KOF. Like before I realized it was the bird.
 
2013-07-24 10:36:43 AM  
from pigs to geese

/geese can and most likely will fark you up
 
2013-07-24 10:50:47 AM  
"The geese fanned their wings and began shrieking when they saw the stranger. The duty officer woke up and the thief was caught red handed."

Nice work Liu!


This story is all well and good, but in the end it's a farking goose and I'm not afraid of them. Flap and hiss all you want.
 
2013-07-24 11:15:43 AM  

Bung_Howdy: thank gawd this important thread was greenlighted


/by some discerning unbiased mod I'm sure


You sound greenburned
 
2013-07-24 11:31:39 AM  

Dirtybird971: "The geese fanned their wings and began shrieking when they saw the stranger. The duty officer woke up and the thief was caught red handed."

Nice work Liu!


This story is all well and good, but in the end it's a farking goose and I'm not afraid of them. Flap and hiss all you want.


I worked at a corporate IBM office building a decade or so ago that had several large fountain ponds outside the building. In the first year after they put in the ponds, two men on their lunch breaks received broken ribs from wild geese beat-downs out on the patios. The goose mafia was only broken up after the ground manager began placing poison around the ponds and they migrated to fountain ponds at other corporate buildings in the area. Fear the goose.
 
2013-07-24 11:48:44 AM  
pkellmey


Smartest
Funniest

2013-07-24 11:31:39 AM


Dirtybird971: "The geese fanned their wings and began shrieking when they saw the stranger. The duty officer woke up and the thief was caught red handed."

Nice work Liu!


This story is all well and good, but in the end it's a farking goose and I'm not afraid of them. Flap and hiss all you want.

I worked at a corporate IBM office building a decade or so ago that had several large fountain ponds outside the building. In the first year after they put in the ponds, two men on their lunch breaks received broken ribs from wild geese beat-downs out on the patios. The goose mafia was only broken up after the ground manager began placing poison around the ponds and they migrated to fountain ponds at other corporate buildings in the area. Fear the goose.


They sound like Pu**ies. When I was 8-10 yrs old I went with family to GA to visit a college roommate of my mother. They had a pond on their property with geese. I was told not to get too close as they'll attack. Well I did and they did except when he opened his wings I kicked him in the chest. I haven't feared one since.
 
2013-07-24 12:09:04 PM  

Dirtybird971: They sound like Pu**ies. When I was 8-10 yrs old I went with family to GA to visit a college roommate of my mother. They had a pond on their property with geese. I was told not to get too close as they'll attack. Well I did and they did except when he opened his wings I kicked him in the chest. I haven't feared one since.


CITGSB, but your handle tells another tale.
 
2013-07-24 12:42:36 PM  

trappedspirit

Dirtybird971: They sound like Pu**ies. When I was 8-10 yrs old I went with family to GA to visit a college roommate of my mother. They had a pond on their property with geese. I was told not to get too close as they'll attack. Well I did and they did except when he opened his wings I kicked him in the chest. I haven't feared one since.

CITGSB, but your handle tells another tale.



ha-ha-ha....Crows I fear. Especially a whole group of them.

;)
 
2013-07-24 12:50:25 PM  

Alonjar: Fano: Geese are pretty potent foes, I know so from nearly having an arm broken by one.

Also: Top Gun

[i46.tinypic.com image 500x500]


Totally believable. Ever gotten too close to a goose with its young? Try it sometime: no need to do anything cruel, just sort of vaguely saunter over in their general direction (you do have to be moving faster than the goslings can waddle, but this isn't hard). You won't get within 30 feet of the little fuzzies before being confronted with 10+ pounds of snarling, snapping, wing-beating death charging straight the fark at you. It's like they're farking channeling Donald Duck or something: sounds kind of like it too. I can totally believe something like that could break my arm.
 
2013-07-24 01:03:30 PM  
At least it wasn't a flock of moosen.

/obscure?
 
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