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(Sun Sentinel)   Man accused of killing his cellmate with toilet paper. He sounds like a charmin individual   (sun-sentinel.com) divider line 72
    More: Florida, Pinellas County Jail, toilet paper, throat  
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5856 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Jul 2013 at 8:35 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-07-23 08:17:22 PM  
d1w7nqlfxfj094.cloudfront.net
 
2013-07-23 08:38:21 PM  
shiatty way to die.
 
2013-07-23 08:39:04 PM  
www.trbimg.com

He looks like a really shart individual.
 
2013-07-23 08:41:31 PM  
That's how he rolls
 
2013-07-23 08:41:44 PM  
Did he wipe him out?
 
2013-07-23 08:44:06 PM  
Prisoners shouldn't have cellmates. We don't NEED to have that many people locked up.

The laws of America are stagnant, convoluted, and broken. We must delve deep into the books and start repealing things, especially vice laws.
 
2013-07-23 08:44:43 PM  
Inmate records showGreenberg had been placed behind bars in 2012 on a murder charge and is awaiting trail on that charge.

That's great, but what about the guy who died? What was he in for?
 
2013-07-23 08:46:42 PM  
As someone who makes toilet paper for a living, I'm getting a kick.

Does this make me a terrorist?
 
2013-07-23 08:46:58 PM  
He'll probably get off Scott free.
 
2013-07-23 08:48:37 PM  
Mr Whipple frowns on these shenanigans.

pegoleg.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-07-23 08:49:59 PM  

AverageAmericanGuy: Inmate records showGreenberg had been placed behind bars in 2012 on a murder charge and is awaiting trail on that charge.

That's great, but what about the guy who died? What was he in for?


Littering.
 
2013-07-23 08:52:20 PM  
Well, now he has a bounty on his head.
 
2013-07-23 08:53:35 PM  
Now they'll probably go and ban toilet paper in prisons
 
2013-07-23 08:54:54 PM  

Danger Avoid Death: AverageAmericanGuy: Inmate records showGreenberg had been placed behind bars in 2012 on a murder charge and is awaiting trail on that charge.

That's great, but what about the guy who died? What was he in for?

Littering.


*slowly moves away on the bench*
 
2013-07-23 08:55:47 PM  
I guess it WAS time to get real about what happens in the bathroom
 
2013-07-23 08:57:14 PM  

AverageAmericanGuy: Danger Avoid Death: AverageAmericanGuy: Inmate records showGreenberg had been placed behind bars in 2012 on a murder charge and is awaiting trail on that charge.

That's great, but what about the guy who died? What was he in for?

Littering.

*slowly moves away on the bench*


And creating a public nuisance.
 
2013-07-23 08:59:33 PM  

AverageAmericanGuy: Inmate records showGreenberg had been placed behind bars in 2012 on a murder charge and is awaiting trail on that charge.

That's great, but what about the guy who died? What was he in for?


Stampeding cattle.
 
2013-07-23 09:01:09 PM  
Hopefully he will rehabilitate and enter back into society as a Kleenex-con.
 
2013-07-23 09:01:38 PM  

dabbletech: He looks like a really shart individual.


Nah, actually has a cocky Hollywood vibe going.
Reminds me of the Fast and Furious guy.

Also, I imagine the situation started like this:
"Dammit man! Stop throwing your TP all over the ground, things are bad here as it is. *other guy throws TP* You better pick that up before I make you eat it."
 
2013-07-23 09:02:21 PM  

AverageAmericanGuy: Inmate records showGreenberg had been placed behind bars in 2012 on a murder charge and is awaiting trail on that charge.

That's great, but what about the guy who died? What was he in for?


According to this site, "Harding, a transient, had been in the jail since Oct. 27, serving a one-year sentence on a burglary charge." That's pretty messed up by those running the jail to put a murderer in a cell with someone there for burglary.
 
2013-07-23 09:03:41 PM  
It would have been the perfect crime: Stuff toilet paper down his throat, he chokes to death, and a few hours later the TP comes out his ass.
/they can't prove it was HIS toilet paper
 
2013-07-23 09:03:43 PM  
I thought this going to be about the TP roll blowguns or something.
 
2013-07-23 09:03:58 PM  

eatin' fetus: Hopefully he will rehabilitate and enter back into society as a Kleenex-con.


You gotta lotta damned gall to wonder if he'll rehabilitate himself. I mean...I MEANNNN...I MEANNNN...
 
2013-07-23 09:06:14 PM  

Makh: Well, now he has a bounty on his head.


Great Scott, man.
 
2013-07-23 09:06:57 PM  

the_celt: As someone who makes toilet paper for a living, I'm getting a kick.

Does this make me a terrorist?


I recently saw a short piece on how toilet paper is made. Does a creepy man with gnarly fingers caress each roll or does that happen at the retail level?
 
2013-07-23 09:08:48 PM  
2 plies and you're out.

/got nothing
 
m00
2013-07-23 09:09:34 PM  
I guess the victim didn't have a guardian angel soft.
 
2013-07-23 09:15:28 PM  

UsikFark: the_celt: As someone who makes toilet paper for a living, I'm getting a kick.

Does this make me a terrorist?

I recently saw a short piece on how toilet paper is made. Does a creepy man with gnarly fingers caress each roll or does that happen at the retail level?


Didn't you see that guy singing in the old Albertson's commercial?

"It's Joe Albertson's supermarket, but the toilet paper is mine."
 
2013-07-23 09:16:38 PM  
Hip con refuses to spare a square.
 
2013-07-23 09:19:23 PM  

Wall_of_Doodoo: Ya know the old saying "Give a murderous felon a roll of TP and he'll kill his cellmate, teach a murderous felon to run a TP factory and he'll end up killing a ton of illegal Mexicans".

I pretty much consider this my mission statement in life.


Explains the Fark handle.
 
2013-07-23 09:20:43 PM  

vudukungfu: shiatty way to die.


the-meter-man: That's how he rolls


Danger Avoid Death: Did he wipe him out?


zamboni: He'll probably get off Scott free.


Makh: Well, now he has a bounty on his head.

 
2013-07-23 09:23:35 PM  
According to Befuddled's link the victim was an old bum transferred into this guy's cell late in the evening. Old man was found dead about 1 am.

The killer's being held for murdering is girlfriend in the same fashion. He claims with his ex it was a sexual asphyxiation gone too far.

My money's on both his deceased girlfriend and this old man being snorers, and this guy being a light-sleeping psycho.
 
2013-07-23 09:24:10 PM  

UsikFark: the_celt: As someone who makes toilet paper for a living, I'm getting a kick.

Does this make me a terrorist?

I recently saw a short piece on how toilet paper is made. Does a creepy man with gnarly fingers caress each roll or does that happen at the retail level?


Define "creepy"...

/fingers aren't gnarly
//hands free manufacturing
 
2013-07-23 09:28:45 PM  

the_celt: Define "creepy"...


lh3.ggpht.com
 
2013-07-23 09:29:29 PM  

doglover: Prisoners shouldn't have cellmates. We don't NEED to have that many people locked up.

The laws of America are stagnant, convoluted, and broken. We must delve deep into the books and start repealing things, especially vice laws.


You're saying we need to flush out all of these squares that are clogging our prison system?
 
2013-07-23 09:31:16 PM  

eatin' fetus: doglover: Prisoners shouldn't have cellmates. We don't NEED to have that many people locked up.

The laws of America are stagnant, convoluted, and broken. We must delve deep into the books and start repealing things, especially vice laws.

You're saying we need to flush out all of these squares that are clogging our prison system?


We have to plunge deep into the judiciary and tidy up.
 
2013-07-23 09:31:42 PM  

Befuddled: AverageAmericanGuy: Inmate records showGreenberg had been placed behind bars in 2012 on a murder charge and is awaiting trail on that charge.

That's great, but what about the guy who died? What was he in for?

According to this site, "Harding, a transient, had been in the jail since Oct. 27, serving a one-year sentence on a burglary charge." That's pretty messed up by those running the jail to put a murderer in a cell with someone there for burglary.


He shoulda burgled that toilet paper.Maybe he did and got caught.
 
2013-07-23 09:32:49 PM  
He was just dispensing some prison justice. Rough, scratchy, justice.
 
2013-07-23 09:33:47 PM  

doglover: eatin' fetus: doglover: Prisoners shouldn't have cellmates. We don't NEED to have that many people locked up.

The laws of America are stagnant, convoluted, and broken. We must delve deep into the books and start repealing things, especially vice laws.

You're saying we need to flush out all of these squares that are clogging our prison system?

We have to plunge deep into the judiciary and tidy up.


From the front all the way to the back.
 
2013-07-23 09:34:44 PM  

UsikFark: the_celt: Define "creepy"...

[lh3.ggpht.com image 512x278]


Different kind of creepy for me.   More of a... deviant creepy
 
2013-07-23 09:36:26 PM  
 
2013-07-23 09:37:03 PM  
I've seen enough evidence to convict.  He's quilty.
 
2013-07-23 09:53:04 PM  
The guy was talking shiat and he had a potty mouth.
 
2013-07-23 09:55:35 PM  

eatin' fetus: doglover: eatin' fetus: doglover: Prisoners shouldn't have cellmates. We don't NEED to have that many people locked up.

The laws of America are stagnant, convoluted, and broken. We must delve deep into the books and start repealing things, especially vice laws.

You're saying we need to flush out all of these squares that are clogging our prison system?

We have to plunge deep into the judiciary and tidy up.

From the front all the way to the back.


We need to wipe the law books clean of dumb rules that do nothing but foul up the judicial system and waste taxpayers money. The strain on our resources is pushing people to act.
 
2013-07-23 09:59:04 PM  

Befuddled: AverageAmericanGuy: Inmate records showGreenberg had been placed behind bars in 2012 on a murder charge and is awaiting trail on that charge.

That's great, but what about the guy who died? What was he in for?

According to this site, "Harding, a transient, had been in the jail since Oct. 27, serving a one-year sentence on a burglary charge." That's pretty messed up by those running the jail to put a murderer in a cell with someone there for burglary.


From the same source: he burgled an unoccupied vehicle . . . car prowling. So yeah, put him in with murdering scum. That'll teach him a lesson for being a homeless guy in somebody else's car.
 
2013-07-23 10:00:23 PM  
img21.imageshack.us
 
2013-07-23 10:02:36 PM  
Sounds like a Code Red to me! Call Lt. Daniel Caffey ASAP!
 
2013-07-23 10:03:38 PM  
if TP was outlawed, only outlaws...
 
2013-07-23 10:05:07 PM  

KrispyKritter: if TP was outlawed, only outlaws...


Who you calling 'outlaw', kemosabe?

ryanseacrest.com
 
2013-07-23 10:05:30 PM  

UsikFark: It would have been the perfect crime: Stuff toilet paper down his throat, he chokes to death, and a few hours later the TP comes out his ass.
/they can't prove it was HIS toilet paper


You can't really dust for TP.
 
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