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(Slate)   "Dear Prudence: My husband makes fun of my small eyes. I think he just now realized I'm Asian"   (slate.com) divider line 61
    More: Fail, Asian, Emily Yoffe, elective surgery  
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11652 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Jul 2013 at 9:44 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-07-23 12:17:57 PM

apt311: Holy sensitive woman!  He's trying to convince you to have it done because it is freaking AWESOME after years of wearing glasses to finally be able to wear sunglasses that actually fit and don't weigh 8 pounds, to be able to walk from cold air to warm air without instantly going blind, to be able to wear a ski mask/scuba goggles/helmet/etc without breaking your nose or fogging them up.  I could keep going, but I see your are falling asleep - ok, or not.

LASIK is the best single investment, outside of my house, that I have ever made.


I can honestly say I have never encountered any of these problems, except perhaps needing contacts with sunglasses but they're not heavy.   I like my glasses, I've worn them too long to not think of myself without them. It'd be weird. I feel weird in contacts but that's about it. I'm also near sighted though so I can see a few feet ahead of me. Still be nice to see though without corrective lenses but it doesn't seem to worth it. I mean sure it'll be great for the next ten years but is it really worth having your eyes fall out?
 
2013-07-23 12:19:05 PM

KimNorth: Like duh! That is why it is HER "best friend". He should get his own best friend the loser that is what you do.....Girls know bullshiat when we hear it we just understand the concept of letting off verbal steam and frustration and he has taken that from her, the jerk!


He talks to her best friend to get perspective on how he can improve their relationship from someone else who knows her, as the article says.  If he were calling up her best friend to biatch her out that would be one thing.  He apparently is having trouble getting along with her during their financial issues and is looking for advice from someone who has in all likelihood been with her longer, and who is almost certainly a more intimate confidante about what he's doing wrong.

Most men aren't going to see that as wrong or him being a loser, but because he's positioning himself in a place where he's potentially interfering with the, "I just want someone to listen!" echo chamber that I've learned women desire, he's treated as a problem and a target for hostility by most women.
 
2013-07-23 12:31:15 PM
Maggie_Luna

Yes, it's worth it.  I wore glasses (myopia) since I was 7 and had Lasik at 42.  It's awesome.  I can see at the beach; I don't have to walk around looking like I'm saluting to keep the raindrops off the lenses, then stop to clean them off when I get inside; as mentioned earlier, no fogging when walking in from the cold; I can see the clock from across the room while I'm still in bed.  I can do active things, like boating, swimming, even roller coastering, without worrying about the metal on my face.

It's funny, one of the most profound revelations was shortly after surgery, I was showering, and realized my feet weren't blurry when I looked down.  Last but not least, I no longer have to have sex with a blurry woman.  Being able to see during that made it 1000% better.
 
2013-07-23 12:37:53 PM

Satanic_Hamster: You think the sideways vagina would have clued him in by now...


They're married, he doesn't get to see the vagina any more.
 
2013-07-23 12:59:38 PM

Igor Jakovsky: MythDragon: MadSkillz: I wonder if the Asian eyeshape comes from an evolutionary response to high winds.

Seeing as that's how they conducted warfare back then, probably so.

There are some gems in this thread. Is the dude in the middle farting out a cat?


I believe he is launching a cat that was just sitiing there mind it's own business, with the power of fart
 
2013-07-23 02:26:37 PM

Kid Shelleen: Maggie_Luna
Last but not least, I no longer have to have sex with a blurry woman.  Being able to see during that made it 1000% better.


Or at the very least, beer goggles are now an option, rather than standard equipment.
 
2013-07-23 03:02:20 PM
Depending on the prescription of the glasses, the distortion of the lenses can make eyes look smaller (like looking through the wrong end of a pair of binoculars).  So an Asian woman with glasses like that would look...like that Will Smith photoshop (tiny facial features, you know the one).

Still, the guy should just let her be.
 
2013-07-23 04:57:18 PM
He pointed out a photo where he said I look like I was sleeping, while in fact I was smiling at the time.


lmao
 
2013-07-23 05:36:55 PM
Or maybe she's stoned all the time?
 
2013-07-23 11:37:39 PM

KimNorth: Super_pope: I love the one where she doesn't like her boyfriend talking with her best friend about her because it was nice when she didn't have an opinion before and would just listen.

What that really means is it was nice to be able to shiat all over him to someone who wasn't getting anything but the most cherry-picked parts of the story to make him look like a gigantic asshole.  Basically it was nice to have someone she could lie to about her problems who would then confirm her biases and parrot her own crap back to her.

Like duh! That is why it is HER "best friend". He should get his own best friend the loser that is what you do.....Girls know bullshiat when we hear it we just understand the concept of letting off verbal steam and frustration and he has taken that from her, the jerk!


It's quite possible he can't discuss his relationship problems with one of his friends without upsetting his girlfriend. There's more social stigma attached to a woman whose relationship is "not successful" than to a man in the same situation. His statement that his only other option is to bottle it up suggests this could be the case here. Since the best friend already knows the situation, talking to her won't embarrass or betray the girlfriend.
 
2013-07-23 11:46:18 PM

aerojockey: Dear Prudence, I believe in live and let live and my husband/friend/parent is a totally great person but with one flaw whereby they are trying to force some behavior upon me. I lack the spine to be assertive about this, did not think to seek counseling, and would never consider breaking things off with this person. What should I do?

Prudie: Be assertive about it. Think about getting some counseling. And this might be a sign the relationship is over.


Yea, my first thought at the end was "Well, the train of excuses to justify his wandering eyes has begun!"

I understand perfectly why she doesn't want Lasik yet, it screws up night vision for a shiatload of people. I'll wait until there's less chance they can fark it up/technology gets better. After all, if they really fark it up, you go blind.
 
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