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(BBC)   The royal water has broken. I repeat, the royal water has broken. This is not a drill. Please report to your station and freak the fark out   (bbc.co.uk) divider line 258
    More: News, Kensington Palace, Paddington, Duchess of Cambridge  
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4738 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Jul 2013 at 3:03 AM (39 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-07-22 04:43:44 AM
One the best know comedies die few days ago and that was not news to the US, but this shiat ? is
get you Farken things in order you farken farkers
 
2013-07-22 04:44:11 AM

Bathia_Mapes: And now I've got the giggles because I just realized I called Charles "Princess Charles". :-D


Now now. Only Camilla is allowed to call him that and even only when she's carrying the riding crop and he's completely decked out in his Princess Celestia COS-playing outfit.

/Good luck getting that mental image out. :>p
 
2013-07-22 04:49:44 AM

IsNoGood: One the best know comedies die few days ago and that was not news to the US, but this shiat ? is
get you Farken things in order you farken farkers


If you mean Mel Smith there was a greenlit thread regarding his death on July 20th.
 
2013-07-22 04:49:53 AM
I'm actually in London right now on vacation. Hope she waits to give birth until after I leave tomorrow. The wife on the other hand is freaking out and is begging all that is holy that the baby comes while we're here.


/Do not understand the obsession.
 
2013-07-22 04:55:34 AM
OMG it's a false flag operation!

/yawn this is news somehow..
 
2013-07-22 05:00:06 AM
meh
 
2013-07-22 05:11:05 AM
I'd like to take this moment to observe how utterly bizarre it is that much of the anglosphere has fetishized every detail of the marriage and procreation of a couple of boring upper class English people whose major selling points are that they have a cute dog and the lady is reasonably attractive and buys nice hats.

It is preposterous that this infant will be Canada's head of state in about 60 years, and even more ridiculous that this event heralds the birth of a future head of a state church.  Can we just consider why, exactly, anyone thinks a theocratic monarchy should be the basis of any political system?  And is there anything, other than sheer lack of political will to address anything constitutional, that justifies Canada of all places continuing to support this remnant of colonialism?  It's hard to find another country that combines Canada's belligerent egalitarianism, disdain of anything elitist or stuck-up, navel-gazing obsession with national identity and citizenship, widespread atheism/apatheism, and multi-ethnic origins that strongly compete with any former sense of British cultural descent.  (You sort of have Australia, but Australia doesn't even have a third of the population speaking French.)  All these things together make Canada a really odd place to continue to promote a foreign monarchy.

The Yanks and the French figured this one out in the 1700s.  Time to join the 18th century, Canada!
 
2013-07-22 05:14:51 AM

quatchi: I think in the wake of the post Diana debacle the UK press and paparazzi were pretty hands off on Harry and William


Yes, they showed great restraint when Harry got in a bit of a spot over that drunken, naked billiards party in Vegas.  The UK tabloids kept a stiff upper lip and refused to report on the story.

/gay celeb snarker at dlisted calls him Prince Hot Ginge, NTTAWWT
 
2013-07-22 05:17:13 AM
I would like to take the time out of my busy schedule to log onto a website, go onto a thread about something I don't care about, and post a large, bandwidth-eating JPEG of someone going "Who cares?" to show my uncaring for it.

/Or I could just post "meh".
//Or, y'know, not even click on the thread at all.
 
2013-07-22 05:22:57 AM
theroyalfirm.files.wordpress.com

One was not enough.

Now they're coming for hsi wife and child.
 
2013-07-22 05:27:14 AM

4tehsnowflakes: quatchi: I think in the wake of the post Diana debacle the UK press and paparazzi were pretty hands off on Harry and William

Yes, they showed great restraint when Harry got in a bit of a spot over that drunken, naked billiards party in Vegas.  The UK tabloids kept a stiff upper lip and refused to report on the story.

/gay celeb snarker at dlisted calls him Prince Hot Ginge, NTTAWWT


They were hands off to the extent that they allowed the royal family to dictate the kind of media coverage the kiddos got for a while, and it was more hands-off until they were adults and were able to manage their press.

This baby is going to be leveraged for publicity for all it's worth, just like the royal wedding was and like Diana and her kids were in the 80s.  The royal family is excellent at PR and they know that they need to sell the happy younger generation to make up for the media disasters that were Chuck, Princess Anne, Andy, etc.
 
2013-07-22 05:29:30 AM
Ok...Royal is coming out.
 
2013-07-22 05:35:54 AM
"...and now we the official shiat-remover readying the royal bedpan for the princesses inevitable labor defecation, as is tradition."
 
2013-07-22 05:36:10 AM

skinink: Hoping the baby comes out resembling Prince Harry...



Tiger Woods
 
2013-07-22 05:38:07 AM

iheartscotch: Come oooon; black baby, for the lulz!


Being the UK, I've been hoping for an East Indian baby.
 
2013-07-22 05:38:50 AM
I'm British. Pity me for my news bulletins will be about nothing else for the next month!

/Supports the French solution
 
2013-07-22 05:40:32 AM
So do they still call it labor when it comes?
Surely labor is a bit lowly for their type.

"we have people to take care of that sort of thing"
 
2013-07-22 05:50:38 AM

bobbette: I'd like to take this moment to observe how utterly bizarre it is that much of the anglosphere has fetishized every detail of the marriage and procreation of a couple of boring upper class English people whose major selling points are that they have a cute dog and the lady is reasonably attractive and buys nice hats.

It is preposterous that this infant will be Canada's head of state in about 60 years, and even more ridiculous that this event heralds the birth of a future head of a state church.  Can we just consider why, exactly, anyone thinks a theocratic monarchy should be the basis of any political system?  And is there anything, other than sheer lack of political will to address anything constitutional, that justifies Canada of all places continuing to support this remnant of colonialism?  It's hard to find another country that combines Canada's belligerent egalitarianism, disdain of anything elitist or stuck-up, navel-gazing obsession with national identity and citizenship, widespread atheism/apatheism, and multi-ethnic origins that strongly compete with any former sense of British cultural descent.  (You sort of have Australia, but Australia doesn't even have a third of the population speaking French.)  All these things together make Canada a really odd place to continue to promote a foreign monarchy.

The Yanks and the French figured this one out in the 1700s.  Time to join the 18th century, Canada!


You can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you! I mean, if I went around saying I was an Emperor because some moistened bint had lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!
 
2013-07-22 05:55:06 AM
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeee....
*runs out side screaming*
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee e eeeeee....

Wait, who the fark cares?
 
2013-07-22 05:56:38 AM

jamspoon: I'm British. Pity me for my news bulletins will be about nothing else for the next month!

/Supports the French solution


This just in, the Royal baby sneezed, is Kate the worst mother in history.  Should CPS come to the rescue?
 
2013-07-22 06:03:34 AM
I hope it is a girl. Their genes would make a pretty princess.
 
2013-07-22 06:04:56 AM
This feels like such a manufactured event. Who really cares at this point? Anyone?
 
2013-07-22 06:05:04 AM
No "SPLOOSH" reference yet?
 
2013-07-22 06:05:57 AM
Even by Fark standards, this thread is in shockingly poor taste.
 
2013-07-22 06:12:17 AM

Bathia_Mapes: IsNoGood: One the best know comedies die few days ago and that was not news to the US, but this shiat ? is
get you Farken things in order you farken farkers

If you mean Mel Smith there was a greenlit thread regarding his death on July 20th.


Ahhh, good how Im able to go to the Wc , and pressed out a new royal member !, Thnaks
 
2013-07-22 06:14:13 AM
The news just reported that Princess Kate arrived at the hospital early this morning, "quietly entering through the back." Just think, if William had done that nine months ago we'd be talking about some real news right now.
 
2013-07-22 06:17:53 AM
This will be Princess Kate's crowning achievement.
 
2013-07-22 06:18:07 AM
The really evil part of me hopes the baby ends up losing the genetic lottery and comes out with all the inbred traits that the royal family has tried to get rid of once they realized it wasn't healthy to fark your cousin, just to remind them of their past.
 
2013-07-22 06:30:17 AM
The Royal Mongoloid? Pip Pip, carry on.
 
2013-07-22 06:30:38 AM
I do have to admit, for two people stuck full on in the glare of the media's spotlight, they do seem quite happy to be together & enjoy each others company.  Here's hoping that a baby just strengthens that feeling rather than driving a wedge between them.

That said, I really don't want to see all the inevitable pictures of her grunting out the royal crotchfruit (you know that at least one of the nurses will sneak out her cell phone & take a picture or two, it would set her up for life).  Let her have a little privacy & whatever dignity she can manage in that situation.

/wouldn't mind  seeing pics of the conception though
//at least her part in it anyway
 
2013-07-22 06:32:21 AM

bobbette: I'd like to take this moment to observe how utterly bizarre it is that much of the anglosphere has fetishized every detail of the marriage and procreation of a couple of boring upper class English people whose major selling points are that they have a cute dog and the lady is reasonably attractive and buys nice hats.

It is preposterous that this infant will be Canada's head of state in about 60 years, and even more ridiculous that this event heralds the birth of a future head of a state church.  Can we just consider why, exactly, anyone thinks a theocratic monarchy should be the basis of any political system?  And is there anything, other than sheer lack of political will to address anything constitutional, that justifies Canada of all places continuing to support this remnant of colonialism?  It's hard to find another country that combines Canada's belligerent egalitarianism, disdain of anything elitist or stuck-up, navel-gazing obsession with national identity and citizenship, widespread atheism/apatheism, and multi-ethnic origins that strongly compete with any former sense of British cultural descent.  (You sort of have Australia, but Australia doesn't even have a third of the population speaking French.)  All these things together make Canada a really odd place to continue to promote a foreign monarchy.

The Yanks and the French figured this one out in the 1700s.  Time to join the 18th century, Canada!


Don't use the US as an example; democracy hasn't been working all that well here in the last few years.
 
2013-07-22 06:36:49 AM
I love how you all love to proclaim loudest how you don't care. If it wasn't for Fark I wouldn't know about this and I'm English. You guys have a fetish for the royals. Half of you love them, the other half love to hate them. Otherwise you wouldn't be here.
 
2013-07-22 06:39:32 AM
will she have the kid vaccinated? How about circumcised?
 
2013-07-22 06:42:51 AM
Oh. Good. So now all the U.S. "news" for the next week and a half will be reported from the U.K. in a truncated format so a bunch of slobbering idiots can watch this shiat. Hooray.
 
2013-07-22 06:46:04 AM

Bathia_Mapes: PsychoLaurie: I kind of doubt they will name the baby Diana, unless it's a middle name. Do all British kids come with four names like Chalres Philip Arthur George??

Just the royals it would seem. Both William & Harry have 4 names, as does Princess Charles' sister, Princess Anne.


No, I have four names. It's relatively common. Some people have an indeterminable number of names. I'd put a small wager on the possibility that Princes William and Henry both have more than 4 officially, but just keep it down for simplicities sake.
 
2013-07-22 06:50:12 AM
img96.imageshack.us
 
2013-07-22 06:52:13 AM

See You Next Tuesday: Slaxl: I love how you all love to proclaim loudest how you don't care. If it wasn't for Fark I wouldn't know about this and I'm English. You guys have a fetish for the royals. Half of you love them, the other half love to hate them. Otherwise you wouldn't be here.

"If it weren't for Fark"? Are you out of your wobbly-toothed skull? It's all every EVERY GODDAMNED NEWS OUTLET.  Are you chained to the radiator of a pederast who only looks at Fark?


Quite. I haven't watched TV or read a newspaper today, nor turned on the radio, and apparently no one else has as no one else has mentioned it. So no, I wouldn't know this was happening if it wasn't on Fark. Is that so difficult to believe?
 
2013-07-22 06:53:34 AM
I'll bet the kid's hair is perfect.
 
2013-07-22 07:00:11 AM

Cheese eating surrender monkey: [img96.imageshack.us image 368x208]


4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-07-22 07:02:43 AM
I'm happy for them. I'm looking forward to the stats.

I'm guessing 7.9lbs 21inches (omg someone do the conversion!!)

I secretly hope they name the baby George.
 
2013-07-22 07:02:58 AM
Oh great, now we won't get much real news for the next few days because all the networks will become the 24/7 royal baby channels :-P
 
2013-07-22 07:04:53 AM

feckingmorons: Yeah, another Britisher on the dole.

At least it isn't a muzzie.


mediacdn.shopatron.com

What a Muzzy might look like.
 
2013-07-22 07:07:43 AM

bobbette: I'd like to take this moment to observe how utterly bizarre it is that much of the anglosphere has fetishized every detail of the marriage and procreation of a couple of boring upper class English people whose major selling points are that they have a cute dog and the lady is reasonably attractive and buys nice hats.

It is preposterous that this infant will be Canada's head of state in about 60 years, and even more ridiculous that this event heralds the birth of a future head of a state church.  Can we just consider why, exactly, anyone thinks a theocratic monarchy should be the basis of any political system?  And is there anything, other than sheer lack of political will to address anything constitutional, that justifies Canada of all places continuing to support this remnant of colonialism?  It's hard to find another country that combines Canada's belligerent egalitarianism, disdain of anything elitist or stuck-up, navel-gazing obsession with national identity and citizenship, widespread atheism/apatheism, and multi-ethnic origins that strongly compete with any former sense of British cultural descent.  (You sort of have Australia, but Australia doesn't even have a third of the population speaking French.)  All these things together make Canada a really odd place to continue to promote a foreign monarchy.

The Yanks and the French figured this one out in the 1700s.  Time to join the 18th century, Canada!


You certainly put a lot of thought into that derp.

It's a babby for God's sake - be happy it's wanted and not "accidentally" flushed down some Chinese drain.
 
2013-07-22 07:09:17 AM
Don't really care as long as I get a holiday out of it.
/was certain I'd get one after that scottish guy won that tennis game...
 
2013-07-22 07:10:12 AM

Mrs.Sharpier: I'm happy for them. I'm looking forward to the stats.

I'm guessing 7.9lbs 21inches (omg someone do the conversion!!)

I secretly hope they name the baby George.


That's about 9/16ths stone and a bit less than 5/16ths of a fathom.
 
2013-07-22 07:10:54 AM

Triumph: Full moon.
7+2+2=11 (The master number)
Girl
Name is Mary


Yeah, Queen Mary would be a good idea.
 
2013-07-22 07:13:09 AM
Not since Farrah Abraham has so much attention been placed on someone's nether regions.
 
2013-07-22 07:19:51 AM

Slaxl: See You Next Tuesday: Slaxl: I love how you all love to proclaim loudest how you don't care. If it wasn't for Fark I wouldn't know about this and I'm English. You guys have a fetish for the royals. Half of you love them, the other half love to hate them. Otherwise you wouldn't be here.

"If it weren't for Fark"? Are you out of your wobbly-toothed skull? It's all every EVERY GODDAMNED NEWS OUTLET.  Are you chained to the radiator of a pederast who only looks at Fark?

Quite. I haven't watched TV or read a newspaper today, nor turned on the radio, and apparently no one else has as no one else has mentioned it. So no, I wouldn't know this was happening if it wasn't on Fark. Is that so difficult to believe?


Get back to work.
 
2013-07-22 07:21:23 AM
What kind of American actually cares about this whole thing? It reminds me of that Queen celebration a year or two ago that CNN was creaming themselves over, I just don't get it.
 
2013-07-22 07:22:14 AM
#1 story on BBC home page at the moment: China Earthquake.

Below it's the Dubai rape case, then below that's the Royal baby.

#1 story on CNN home page at the moment: "Royal Baby on the Way".  The Earthquake's a single sentence link stuck on the left below "5 things to start your new day".
 
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