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(Uproxx)   You might want to think twice before ordering a pizza with sausage and extra cheese from this guy   (uproxx.com) divider line 38
    More: Sick, HuffPost Weird News, 4chan  
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10589 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Jul 2013 at 11:10 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



38 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-07-19 11:12:33 AM
www.fairfaxunderground.com
Hey, I didn't order sausage on this!
 
2013-07-19 11:12:34 AM
4chan

Of course.
 
2013-07-19 11:13:31 AM
He was watching the Farrah Abraham video.
 
2013-07-19 11:14:14 AM
25.media.tumblr.com

Also this guy.

/hot
//like the pizza, despite being 2 hours late...
 
2013-07-19 11:18:22 AM
Don't order the special sauce.
 
2013-07-19 11:18:49 AM

KellyKellyKelly: [25.media.tumblr.com image 500x375]

Also this guy.

/hot
//like the pizza, despite being 2 hours late...


Breadsticks produced from your pants are the best kind.
 
2013-07-19 11:19:23 AM

KellyKellyKelly: [25.media.tumblr.com image 500x375]

Also this guy.

/hot
//like the pizza, despite being 2 hours late...


I think he keeps it in his pants.
 
2013-07-19 11:21:02 AM
Stay classy, San Diego.
 
2013-07-19 11:21:54 AM
And yet time and time again I get people who continually ignore my consultation when I tell them they need to upgrade their security, hardware, and procedures....this is what happens

You get caught jerking it at work
 
2013-07-19 11:24:49 AM
The shadow the chair makes doesn't seem to include the shadow of someone sitting in it, but maybe it's just the multiple sources of lighting.  It doesn't even look like the coat on the chair is casting a shadow.

Also, the reflection in the fridge behind the chair shows the red bag and the desk, but not a chair *and person* in between them.

Still, I find it just as likely that some dude was jerkin' it at work, and a disgruntled to-be-ex-employee knew about it and took a blurry cell phone picture of it.
 
2013-07-19 11:26:24 AM
uhhh ...
finding a hair in your pizza from this guy.....
 
2013-07-19 11:33:38 AM
San Diego?
He was "jackin' it for the Looooord..."

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-07-19 11:38:33 AM
How could you honestly be thinking... nice open kitchen, stainless steel counters... I really need to fap
 
2013-07-19 11:38:38 AM
i1.ytimg.com

Human semen on food?  That's just not how we do things here!
 
2013-07-19 11:50:25 AM

IdBeCrazyIf: And yet time and time again I get people who continually ignore my consultation when I tell them they need to upgrade their security, hardware, and procedures....this is what happens

You get caught jerking it at work


I was screwing around on 4chan when this thread happened.  Almost every night there's an "unsecured cams" thread and the stuff people find is incredible.  Right down to what must be exhibitionists hooking up cameras to follow their every movement in their own home.
 
2013-07-19 11:50:30 AM
i1.ytimg.com

hey.  We didn't order this pizza . . . . . .with SAUSAGE!
 
2013-07-19 11:52:48 AM
Ah, for the sizzle of a big glob of jizz hitting the hot grease in a fry master. Yes, I have.
 
2013-07-19 11:53:25 AM
If its not your kitchen just show the news crew yours.
 
2013-07-19 11:55:38 AM
The worst thing about it is that his white hair is so identifiable (and the image is so clear) that this guy's denial that it's him is pretty much pointless. He knows it's him. He knows he got caught. He knows this has the potential to go viral and ruin his business.

So what are his options?
1- Apologize? That's admitting he whipped out his skin flute in a kitchen. He'll lose customers and his reputation will go further down the drain.
2- Deny, deny, deny. Yeah, damage has been done, but when #1 is your only other option...
 
2013-07-19 12:01:48 PM

teenytinycornteeth: I was screwing around on 4chan when this thread happened. Almost every night there's an "unsecured cams" thread and the stuff people find is incredible. Right down to what must be exhibitionists hooking up cameras to follow their every movement in their own home.


Its amazing some of the shiat you can tap into

City wide camera networks, banks, strip clubs, etc..

You name it, there is likely an unsecured network with cameras of it out there
 
2013-07-19 12:01:50 PM
Dick in a (pizza) box.
 
2013-07-19 12:03:47 PM

IdBeCrazyIf: Its amazing some of the shiat you can tap into

City wide camera networks, banks, strip clubs, etc..

You name it, there is likely an unsecured network with cameras of it out there


I must up my computer knowledge to acquire these feeds.
 
2013-07-19 12:06:13 PM
El Morro: The worst thing about it is that his white hair is so identifiable (and the image is so clear) that this guy's denial that it's him is pretty much pointless. He knows it's him. He knows he got caught. He knows this has the potential to go viral and ruin his business.

So what are his options?
1- Apologize? That's admitting he whipped out his skin flute in a kitchen. He'll lose customers and his reputation will go further down the drain.
2- Deny, deny, deny. Yeah, damage has been done, but when #1 is your only other option...


3- step down from day to day operations and have some manager run the place for you and claim its under new management.
 
2013-07-19 12:09:48 PM

Oldiron_79: El Morro: The worst thing about it is that his white hair is so identifiable (and the image is so clear) that this guy's denial that it's him is pretty much pointless. He knows it's him. He knows he got caught. He knows this has the potential to go viral and ruin his business.

So what are his options?
1- Apologize? That's admitting he whipped out his skin flute in a kitchen. He'll lose customers and his reputation will go further down the drain.
2- Deny, deny, deny. Yeah, damage has been done, but when #1 is your only other option...

3- step down from day to day operations and have some manager run the place for you and claim its under new management.


4 - embrace it, make t-shirts and rag "napkins" with your restaurant's logo and phone number.
 
2013-07-19 12:13:31 PM
www.sonymoviechannel.com

Extra anchovies is still okay, right?
 
2013-07-19 12:20:59 PM
Today, I found out there is 'Surveillance Camera Porn' on the internet.

And I'm like 'WTF, man?! That's farked up....Let's register 'securitycameraporn.com!'
 
2013-07-19 12:21:06 PM
But did he wash his hands after?
 
2013-07-19 12:21:11 PM
Calling down for more mayo?
 
2013-07-19 12:25:30 PM
This dude must have a dong the size of Thor's hammer.  They blurred all the way up to his man-boobs in the article photo.  It's either that or his old man balls slid up that far as he was leaning back.  The answer to the next question is "No, I don't want to see the unblurred photo."
 
2013-07-19 01:29:11 PM

teenytinycornteeth: IdBeCrazyIf: And yet time and time again I get people who continually ignore my consultation when I tell them they need to upgrade their security, hardware, and procedures....this is what happens

You get caught jerking it at work

I was screwing around on 4chan when this thread happened.  Almost every night there's an "unsecured cams" thread and the stuff people find is incredible.  Right down to what must be exhibitionists hooking up cameras to follow their every movement in their own home.


I saw it, too. I think half the users on 4chan were blowing up this guy's phone asking for a pizza with "special sauce."
 
2013-07-19 01:30:08 PM
No BigSausagePizza.com references yet?  Fie for shame!

/at least Clara and Spanky made an appearance
 
2013-07-19 01:35:22 PM

MrSplifferton: But did he wash his hands after?


No. That's why we went in on him. After jerking it he went and made food.
 
2013-07-19 01:37:07 PM
Speaking of crazy, any updates on Crazy Amy?
 
2013-07-19 01:38:22 PM

fireclown: [i1.ytimg.com image 850x637]

hey.  We didn't order this pizza . . . . . .with SAUSAGE!


came here to say this.
 
2013-07-19 01:59:08 PM
I'm a SD local and a friend of mine goes there for their wings (really tasty, apparently). I showed him the article and says that is definitely Jersey Mike's, and anyone who has ever been there knows that dude and that counter. Mr Whack is always there apparently. Good times! I might hit that place up now. Give him a wink and a nod.
 
2013-07-19 03:46:41 PM

Misconduc: He was watching the Farrah Abraham video.


There's a video?
 
2013-07-19 07:13:19 PM
i.qkme.me
 
2013-07-19 08:38:46 PM
Bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
DirtyKate: K, but don't tell anybody ;-)
DirtyKate: Who are you?
Bloodninja: I've got blond hair, blue eyes, I work out a lot
Bloodninja: And I have a part time job delivering for Papa John's in my Geo Storm.
DirtyKate: You sound sexy.. I bet you want me in the back of your car..
Bloodninja: Maybe some other time. You should call up Papa John's and make an order
DirtyKate: Haha! OK
DirtyKate: Hello! I'd like an extra-EXTRA large pizza just dripping with sauce.
Bloodninja: Well, first they would say, "Hello, this is Papa John's, how may I help you", then they tell you the specials, and then you would make your order. So that's an X-Large. What toppings do you want?
DirtyKate: I want everything, baby!
Bloodninja: Is this a delivery?
DirtyKate: Umm...Yes
DirtyKate: So you're bringing the pizza to my house now? Cause I'm home alone... and I think I'll take a shower...
Bloodninja: Good. It will take about fifteen minutes to cook, and then I'll drive to your house.
**pause**
DirtyKate:I'm almost finished with my shower... Hurry up!
Bloodninja: You can't hurry good pizza.
Bloodninja: I'm on my way now though
**pause**
DirtyKate: So you're at my front door now.
Bloodninja: How did you know?
Bloodninja: I knock but you can't hear me cause you're in the shower. So I let myself in, and walk inside. I put the pizza down on your coffee table.
Bloodninja: Are you ready to get nasty, baby? I'm as hot as a pizza oven
DirtyKate: ooohh yeah. I step out of the shower and I'm all wet and cold. Warm me up baby
Bloodninja: So you're still in the bathroom?
DirtyKate: Yeah, I'm wrapping a towel around myself.
Bloodninja: I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door....
DirtyKate: What the fark?
DirtyKate: You perverted piece of s**t
DirtyKate: F**k
 
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