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(WCVB Boston)   "This is malicious fecal distribution"   (wcvb.com) divider line 38
    More: Amusing, food distribution, security camera  
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7994 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Jul 2013 at 10:37 PM (39 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-07-18 10:55:11 PM
4 votes:

berylman: Some people have faulty intestinal peristalsis and need to bounce around to get the inner tubes moving. Perfectly sane.


Then they can bounce around in their on house to get the poop moving.
2013-07-18 11:48:37 PM
3 votes:

baorao: ReapTheChaos: Maybe she should take her morning shiat BEFORE she goes for a jog. Just a thought.

She might be like my dog, where she has this extra poop reservoir dedicated for mid-exercise evacuation.


Then she should plan her run to go by a gas station or convenience store and use their bathroom.  That way she can not schitt in public and wipe her ass.
2013-07-18 10:45:24 PM
3 votes:
He's worried about the police not taking it seriously? Fine. Don't take it to the police.

He has a web cam set up. Sub in something with a little more resolving power, zoom in, and once he has some footage that clearly identifies her, post her "in action" for all the world to see.

Send photos of her in the squat to the local papers.
2013-07-19 12:04:39 AM
2 votes:

dv-ous: ReapTheChaos: Maybe she should take her morning shiat BEFORE she goes for a jog. Just a thought.

She probably tried, but if she had the hangover shiats and the jogging loosened it up, well, she might not have had a lot of warning or options.

It happens.


That is when you stop running, pinch your cheeks, walk and find the nearest McDonald's, Denny's, Dunkin Donuts, whatever. Dropping your draws and shiatting in a neighborhood is a little too native for me.
2013-07-18 11:47:09 PM
2 votes:
Just keep a video camera by the front/back door and watch for her.  When you see her approaching grab the camera and go out and film her schitting on your house, and get a good close up of her face.  Then post it on the internet!  No expectation of privacy when schitting in public!
2013-07-18 10:57:53 PM
2 votes:

ReapTheChaos: Maybe she should take her morning shiat BEFORE she goes for a jog. Just a thought.


Sometimes it's the motion that gets things moving.  I can lay in bed reading for an hour without the slightest need to go to the bathroom.  Then I get up and walk to the kitchen.  My body says, "Time to poop.  Now!"

But this crazy chick's actions seem intentional.  I can see it happening once.  But getting caught out at the exact same place multiple times is no accident.
2013-07-18 10:49:59 PM
2 votes:

SpdrJay: He should film Poopy McJogger and put her up on YouTube for the world to laugh at.

/


Better, sell the footage to a German pron company and make a good $$$.

A live webcam would be even better. I know some people who would pay big money for it.

/I mean I don't know these people just heard about them
//OK then, what's the price?
2013-07-18 10:49:40 PM
2 votes:

ReapTheChaos: Maybe she should take her morning shiat BEFORE she goes for a jog. Just a thought.


She might be like my dog, where she has this extra poop reservoir dedicated for mid-exercise evacuation.
2013-07-18 10:45:53 PM
2 votes:
He may want to be very specific in how he "catches her" lest he end up on a sex offender list.
2013-07-18 10:45:44 PM
2 votes:

AGremlin: Remember when you used to be able to discretely shiat in your favorite alley on your weekend morning jog without wiping?  Not anymore.

Thanks Google glass.


I always do it discretely. When in an alley on a morning run, I do it discreetly, too.
2013-07-18 10:44:10 PM
2 votes:
"If it happens again, I'm going to run out there with a hose and hose her down and say, 'Bad human!'" he said,

It puts the poop in the toilet or else it gets the hose again.
2013-07-18 10:43:42 PM
2 votes:
He should film Poopy McJogger and put her up on YouTube for the world to laugh at.

/
2013-07-19 04:34:46 AM
1 votes:

Bird3149: I used to have a homeless person vomit in my yard every two or three weeks. Truly awful vomit.


As opposed to wonderful amazing vomit.
2013-07-19 01:10:51 AM
1 votes:

SpaceBison: As someone who has run in races before, this is preferable to getting stuck behind the guy that has crapped his own pants.
[wtfoodge.com image 800x537]


"I thought it was a fart!"
2013-07-19 01:08:44 AM
1 votes:

SpaceBison: As someone who has run in races before, this is preferable to getting stuck behind the guy that has crapped his own pants.
[wtfoodge.com image 800x537]


Did he win?

I bet he was running faster after he shiat his pants. By the look on his face he looks like he can't stand his own smell and is trying to run away from himself. Can't run fast enough to do that.

But I really love the looks on the spectators faces.
2013-07-19 01:01:58 AM
1 votes:
Only a woman could get away with a mid run poop.  Ass hair would ruin a man's chance of doing it properly.

Also, if they catch this woman and she's doing it because she won't poop in her boyfriend's apartment because he'll think she is gross, that's a farking win right there...
2013-07-19 01:01:30 AM
1 votes:
Another reason to hate farkin' runners
2013-07-19 12:33:55 AM
1 votes:
Jabberwookiee:
You are truly a role model. May other farkers young and old look upon this post and behold the true glory of its wisdom.

/been there
//done that
///and then some


This. I have been there and done that as well. Thankfully for me, the episodes happened in relatively unpopulated areas with a dense stand of trees nearby. I have learned from those experiences that I should not go for a walk shortly after eating a good dinner and enjoying a few beers. Only bad things can happen from that.
2013-07-19 12:01:07 AM
1 votes:
Fecal is an adjective. A distribution can be fecal only metaphorically.

/poop nazi
2013-07-18 11:56:53 PM
1 votes:

jtown: ReapTheChaos: Maybe she should take her morning shiat BEFORE she goes for a jog. Just a thought.

Sometimes it's the motion that gets things moving.  I can lay in bed reading for an hour without the slightest need to go to the bathroom.  Then I get up and walk to the kitchen.  My body says, "Time to poop.  Now!"

But this crazy chick's actions seem intentional.  I can see it happening once.  But getting caught out at the exact same place multiple times is no accident.


You're right. The first time is random. The second time is suspicious. But the turd time....
2013-07-18 11:56:34 PM
1 votes:
Amusing, subby?

That shiat ain't funny,
2013-07-18 11:29:56 PM
1 votes:

Fart_Machine: ongbok: Wait a minute. What the hell did she wipe her ass with? Or did she run home with a shiatty ass? And if she ran home with a shiatty ass, that shiat must have been itching like hell all the way home.

/These are the important questions, not who she is.

So look for the perp with smelly fingers?


Look for the perp with a disgusting vaginal infection.
2013-07-18 11:17:45 PM
1 votes:

jtown: Sometimes it's the motion that gets things moving. I can lay in bed reading for an hour without the slightest need to go to the bathroom. Then I get up and walk to the kitchen. My body says, "Time to poop. Now!"


Yep.  I was on a business trip once in a sort of wilderness area.  Decided to take advantage by going for an early morning jog and take in all of Mother Nature's glory.  Half-way through, the old bowels dropped like a two ton weight.  I left Mother Nature a gift on the side of the road and decided that early morning jogs were overrated.
2013-07-18 11:15:23 PM
1 votes:
I think there's a good chance someone will see this and go *I know who she is* and it'll be all over the internet in no time

or someone will organize one of those human search engine things, crowd source? and hunt her down just to humiliate her

There was that woman in Japan I think it was whose little dog crapped on a train or a bus and she refused to pick it up
It was filmed and she was identified in no time
2013-07-18 11:15:20 PM
1 votes:

DirtyDeadGhostofEbenezerCooke: Her name is was Nicole.

[entropy2.com image 468x308]


Just accept it. She's dead. And has been for a long time.
2013-07-18 11:09:42 PM
1 votes:

baorao: ReapTheChaos: Maybe she should take her morning shiat BEFORE she goes for a jog. Just a thought.

She might be like my dog, where she has this extra poop reservoir dedicated for mid-exercise evacuation.


"Mid-exercise evacuation" is almost as good as Malicious Fecal Distribution.
2013-07-18 11:08:22 PM
1 votes:
We had some homeless guy take a dump on the deck at work.

It was 7:30ish in the morning, no one at the casino, he dropped trou, dropped a duece and went on his way.

Of course we had it on surveillance - goofy thing is he looked back at what he had left, just to make sure it was there.

We wanted to believe it was canine feces, but after reviewing the tape. And sadly, I had to 1) Watch the tape and 2) Clean it up...

Ahhh - North Aurora Ave... The 358 brings all sorts of people by.
2013-07-18 11:01:55 PM
1 votes:

jtown: ReapTheChaos: Maybe she should take her morning shiat BEFORE she goes for a jog. Just a thought.

Sometimes it's the motion that gets things moving.  I can lay in bed reading for an hour without the slightest need to go to the bathroom.  Then I get up and walk to the kitchen.  My body says, "Time to poop.  Now!"

But this crazy chick's actions seem intentional.  I can see it happening once.  But getting caught out at the exact same place multiple times is no accident.


If you really want that feeling, drink a big glass of water. To magnify that even more, add a few punches of sea salt to the water.
2013-07-18 10:57:27 PM
1 votes:
I still don't understand why he went to the media. If she's that consistent, there are so many ways he could have dealt with it I can't even begin the list of enjoyable ways.
2013-07-18 10:54:42 PM
1 votes:
Joggers diarrhea is a real problem. You jostle back and forth enough, along with drinking lots of water, and you're going to trip some "flush system" switch.
2013-07-18 10:54:40 PM
1 votes:

buckler: Pribar: Or maybe a scoped air rifle, get in some target practice while you teach her manners

I imagine it going down like this.


Not just paintballs. Frozen paintballs.
2013-07-18 10:51:04 PM
1 votes:
Eeeeew.  She doesn't even wipe.

s3.amazonaws.com

"If it happens again, I'm going to run out there with a hose and hose her down and say, 'Bad human!'"

Please, please, please catch this on HD cameras from multiple angles.

This has to be some crazy ex thing.  Maybe that's where one of her former boyfriends used to live and she's too crazy to realize that someone else lives there now.
2013-07-18 10:48:54 PM
1 votes:
I'm sure the plants around her poop are happy for the nutrients.
2013-07-18 10:48:09 PM
1 votes:

Pribar: Or maybe a scoped air rifle, get in some target practice while you teach her manners


I imagine it going down like this.
2013-07-18 10:44:34 PM
1 votes:
I used to have a homeless person vomit in my yard every two or three weeks. Truly awful vomit.
2013-07-18 10:44:30 PM
1 votes:
Invest in some poison oak and elephant grass hedges, that or string some razor wire around the perimeter to discourage the phantom shiatter
2013-07-18 10:43:53 PM
1 votes:
Remember when you used to be able to discretely shiat in your favorite alley on your weekend morning jog without wiping?  Not anymore.

Thanks Google glass.
2013-07-18 10:42:22 PM
1 votes:
Awesome.
 
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