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(AZ Family)   A man is found dead in the desert. He is wearing a backpack containing two reptiles. There are no other footprints near the body. How did he die?   (azfamily.com) divider line 32
    More: Dumbass, Daniel Genaro, Fish Department, Cochise County Sheriff's Office  
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18855 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Jul 2013 at 3:46 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-07-18 03:53:16 AM  
10 votes:

ecmoRandomNumbers: He died of Arizona in July.


Cause of death: Being Outside in July

In other news, we have a state reptile?

www.bloomberg.com
2013-07-18 04:09:15 AM  
5 votes:
Seen fleeing from the scene:
lh3.ggpht.com
2013-07-18 04:14:52 AM  
4 votes:
He had severe Von Recklinghausen's Neurofibromatosis. One of the internal fibroids which, over the years, had attached to his proximal aorta finally caused a weakening of the vascular wall leading to an inevitable dissecting aortic aneurysm. The pain was too much, it was as if an invisible railroad spike was stabbing him through his chest and out of his back. He thought about some reptiles. He thought about his pregnant daughter living in St. Croix. He thought he heard his wife's voice calling to him .. his wife who had died so long ago. He looked up and she was standing in front of him .. telling him, "It's not your time, yet. You have much to do here." The pain seemed to abate somewhat, and as he struggled to his feet she whispered to him, "I'm just screwing with you." The aneurysm erupted into and throughout his mediastinum. He felt like a hand grenade had gone off inside of him. His body fell limp onto the earth. He was, as they say in Texas, D.R.T.

Dead Right There.
2013-07-17 09:15:47 PM  
4 votes:
scrapetv.com
2013-07-17 09:37:05 PM  
3 votes:
Reptile Dysfunction....it's a killer.
2013-07-18 06:07:47 AM  
2 votes:
How I think he died...

img827.imageshack.us
2013-07-18 04:11:24 AM  
2 votes:
An 800lb snowman fell on him?
2013-07-17 10:42:52 PM  
2 votes:

violentsalvation: ecmoRandomNumbers: In other news, we have a state reptile?

Should be the Gila monster.


I know, right? And the state bird should be a rabid bat. All of our state symbols should be able to kill you.
2013-07-17 09:15:50 PM  
2 votes:
He died of Arizona in July.

In other news, we have a state reptile?
2013-07-17 09:07:24 PM  
2 votes:
www.newgameplusplus.net
2013-07-18 03:57:16 PM  
1 votes:
He obviously died from a-reptile disfunction.
2013-07-18 01:59:49 PM  
1 votes:

gibbon1: ecmoRandomNumbers: He died of Arizona in July.

Cause of death: Being Outside in July

In other news, we have a state reptile?

[www.bloomberg.com image 200x266]


Outstanding!
2013-07-18 12:40:56 PM  
1 votes:
I love these old-school text adventures.

L
2013-07-18 09:13:07 AM  
1 votes:
gfid: A state reptile? Hell, we have a state rock where I live. Our legislature apparently doesn't have anything better to do.

Amazingly enough, forty five of the fifty states have a state rock. Link 46 if you count crack cocaine as New Jersey's state rock.
2013-07-18 08:52:20 AM  
1 votes:

GunPlumber: Sand people. They travel single file to hide their numbers.


Can't call 'em Sand People anymore.  Too racist.  You're supposed to call 'em "Tusken-Americans" now.
2013-07-18 08:30:23 AM  
1 votes:
My guess:
www.feistees.com
2013-07-18 08:19:20 AM  
1 votes:
www.vote29.com
/realizes this was supposed to the the Mojave
2013-07-18 07:49:12 AM  
1 votes:
The Cochise County Sheriff's Office

www.indyweek.com
2013-07-18 07:19:02 AM  
1 votes:

Archie Goodwin: An 800lb snowman fell on him?


wasn't me.
2013-07-18 06:36:29 AM  
1 votes:
He was sky-diving, jumped out of an airplane, but the parachute didn't open because it had rattlesnakes in it. The pack on his back is a rattle-snake infected parachute.
2013-07-18 05:13:17 AM  
1 votes:
One set of footprints?
He died somewhere else and Jesus dumped the body there.
Put out an APB for Jesus.
Caution: If you shoot and kill him, hang around the morgue a few days, he tends to wander off.
2013-07-18 04:55:44 AM  
1 votes:

ReapTheChaos: "Arizona Game and Fish Department spokesman Mark Hart says trade in the snakes is illegal but that there is some poaching."

It's illegal to kill a rattlesnake in AZ? Are you farking kidding me? Here in TX that's a year round sport. We even make an event out of it and have Rattlesnake Roundupswith rides for the kids, cook-offs, snake skin souvenirs and all the snake jerky you can eat.


You live in a place that has made Whacking Day a reality?
2013-07-18 04:54:49 AM  
1 votes:

ReapTheChaos: "Arizona Game and Fish Department spokesman Mark Hart says trade in the snakes is illegal but that there is some poaching."

It's illegal to kill a rattlesnake in AZ? Are you farking kidding me? Here in TX that's a year round sport. We even make an event out of it and have Rattlesnake Roundupswith rides for the kids, cook-offs, snake skin souvenirs and all the snake jerky you can eat.


Whatever else people say about Texas, I think we can all agree you're smarter than Arizona. Arizona is like Desert Mississippi.
2013-07-18 04:13:14 AM  
1 votes:
i2.photobucket.com

Was there a tortoise?
2013-07-18 03:50:49 AM  
1 votes:
Ninjas got him.
2013-07-18 03:50:30 AM  
1 votes:
He probably died before being pushed through the Stargate
2013-07-18 12:58:01 AM  
1 votes:
Arizona desert in July.  I'm guessing he was poached.
2013-07-18 12:55:13 AM  
1 votes:
He stopped breathing
2013-07-17 11:08:50 PM  
1 votes:
Well you know what they say: a snake in the pack is worth two in the desert, or something like that
2013-07-17 10:22:04 PM  
1 votes:

Shostie: Is one of them Voight-Kampf questions?


You're not helping. Why is that?
2013-07-17 09:51:55 PM  
1 votes:
Is one of them Voight-Kampf questions?
2013-07-17 09:41:50 PM  
1 votes:

ecmoRandomNumbers: He died of Arizona


i.imgur.com
 
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