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(Globe and Mail)   Queen Liz tells Kate to hurry up and pump out some heir so she can go her bloody vacay already (paraphrased)   (theglobeandmail.com) divider line 65
    More: Obvious, Queen Liz, Balmoral, public engagement  
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4078 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Jul 2013 at 6:15 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-07-17 05:53:06 PM
is this the thing where the queen has to be at the birthing so she can imbibe the blood of a newborn heir and extend her life or am i thinking of something else?
 
2013-07-17 06:18:06 PM
Grumpy old queen.
 
2013-07-17 06:18:14 PM
Oh yes, I can tell she is desperately in need of a break from her exhausting life of waving at crowds and eating swans all day.
 
2013-07-17 06:18:36 PM
I read that as bloody va-jay-jay.
 
2013-07-17 06:20:22 PM

rev. dave: Grumpy old queen.


She's a good sheila, and not a bit stuck-up.
 
2013-07-17 06:21:28 PM

thomps: is this the thing where the queen has to be at the birthing so she can imbibe the blood of a newborn heir and extend her life or am i thinking of something else?


That's the Cheneys.
 
2013-07-17 06:22:31 PM
But they havent brought in the most expensive machine in the hospital yet !
 
2013-07-17 06:22:34 PM
Random Queen Elizabeth fact: She's a lizard and eats cucumbers like you and I eat sugar-snacks.
 
2013-07-17 06:27:28 PM
Royal officials have remained vague about the due date of the baby so the world media's has been camped since July 1 outside St. Mary's Hospital in London where Kate is due to give birth, growing increasingly impatient with what has been dubbed the "Great Kate Wait".

Is the birth being announced by smoke signal? Why is the media camped out at the hospital when the world can find out through a simple phone call?
 
2013-07-17 06:27:57 PM
I'm guessing the holdup is some glitch in the transportation machine on the lizard planet.
 
2013-07-17 06:28:48 PM

alienated: But they havent brought in the most expensive machine in the hospital yet !


The one that goes "PING"?
 
2013-07-17 06:30:44 PM

miss diminutive: Royal officials have remained vague about the due date of the baby so the world media's has been camped since July 1 outside St. Mary's Hospital in London where Kate is due to give birth, growing increasingly impatient with what has been dubbed the "Great Kate Wait".

Is the birth being announced by smoke signal? Why is the media camped out at the hospital when the world can find out through a simple phone call?


People are too stupid to take in information if it's not accompanied by video. This is why there's teevee news at all. They're hoping to film the Royal Steam Omnibus as the Beefeaters, escorted by Life Guard Cavalry, drive the Royal Baby Note Page to Buckingham Palace, where he will hand over the hand-written birth announcement to the queen. She will then cut off his head and lay her eggs in his corpse, in time-honored English Royal Family tradition.
 
2013-07-17 06:31:33 PM
Personally I think that she's lived as long as she has, because she's trying to outlive
her embarrassment of a son, Charles, or at least live long enough so his "reign" isn't
that long.  ;)
 
2013-07-17 06:36:09 PM

YoOjo: Random Queen Elizabeth fact: She's a lizard and eats cucumbers like you and I eat sugar-snacks.


mbillips: I'm guessing the holdup is some glitch in the transportation machine on the lizard planet.


mbillips: She will then cut off his head and lay her eggs in his corpse, in time-honored English Royal Family tradition.


The lizard trifecta made me shoot root beer out my nose. It burns.
 
2013-07-17 06:36:27 PM
Well, will Kate be MILFy or will she get that old English lady look?
/will be a sad monkey if so.
 
2013-07-17 06:37:57 PM

Kurmudgeon: Well, will Kate be MILFy or will she get that old English lady look?
/will be a sad monkey if so.


She's been doing pilates and other exercise the entire pregnancy.  Plus, she's known to be quite "sporty."  My guess is that the baby weight falls off her in record time.
 
2013-07-17 06:47:40 PM
i309.photobucket.com
 
2013-07-17 06:48:15 PM
serious question: Do Brits actually like the queen? She seems like a biatch. Plus there's the whole thing where she had Princess Di killed. Is she resented for that, or is she like royalty over there?
 
2013-07-17 06:49:39 PM

miss diminutive: YoOjo: Random Queen Elizabeth fact: She's a lizard and eats cucumbers like you and I eat sugar-snacks.

mbillips: I'm guessing the holdup is some glitch in the transportation machine on the lizard planet.

mbillips: She will then cut off his head and lay her eggs in his corpse, in time-honored English Royal Family tradition.

The lizard trifecta made me shoot root beer out my nose. It burns.


Quick, snort some milk to ease the burning. Not that 2% nonsense, some real goat milk. Then get the plastic jug and pour whatever's left over on your head, dance in the milky mess and do white stringy snot-rockets at anyone watching.
 
2013-07-17 06:51:53 PM
www.gossipcop.com
Hurry up and pop it out you wanker!
 
2013-07-17 06:53:12 PM

Four Horsemen of the Domestic Dispute: [www.gossipcop.com image 400x336]
Hurry up and pop it out you wanker!


came in here for this (or similar) pic...thanks :)
 
2013-07-17 06:54:12 PM

Kurmudgeon: Well, will Kate be MILFy or will she get that old English lady look?
/will be a sad monkey if so.


Her vagina's about to look like a run over banana peel.

llnw.wbez.org
Imagine those stretched, matted labia stuck to her thigh as William peaks under her skirt then turns sickly.
 
2013-07-17 06:57:55 PM

YoOjo: miss diminutive: YoOjo: Random Queen Elizabeth fact: She's a lizard and eats cucumbers like you and I eat sugar-snacks.

mbillips: I'm guessing the holdup is some glitch in the transportation machine on the lizard planet.

mbillips: She will then cut off his head and lay her eggs in his corpse, in time-honored English Royal Family tradition.

The lizard trifecta made me shoot root beer out my nose. It burns.

Quick, snort some milk to ease the burning. Not that 2% nonsense, some real goat milk. Then get the plastic jug and pour whatever's left over on your head, dance in the milky mess and do white stringy snot-rockets at anyone watching.




Miss is a canuckian, she drinks milk from a bag, not a plastic jug.
 
2013-07-17 06:59:44 PM

bangmaid: serious question: Do Brits actually like the queen? She seems like a biatch. Plus there's the whole thing where she had Princess Di killed. Is she resented for that, or is she like royalty over there?


Some do and some don't, like anything really. She went through a bad patch when she eliminated Diana but she has been generous with the State Holidays in the past few years, Jubilees & weddings etc have given her subjects a few extra days off work, so she's moderately popular now, plus she's older than anyone cares to admit and still goose-stepping about with her stiff brown shoes on and carrying her bag full of shrunken heads, so all-in-all she's probably more popular now than at any point since 1977.
She'll never beat her approval rating of 1977, but then who amongst us can?

/dual-citizen, kind of knows the Queen, well I've licked the back of her head a few hundred times anyway.
 
2013-07-17 07:02:16 PM
The Queen's actual statement was "Hurry up and pump out some heir so I can go on my bloody holiday already."
 
2013-07-17 07:02:51 PM
I heard a lot of people are waiting to name their kids so the kid could have the same name as the royal baby. I hope this doesn't lead to a bunch of babies named miscarriage.

/window seat please
 
2013-07-17 07:08:10 PM

dittybopper: rev. dave: Grumpy old queen.

She's a good sheila, and not a bit stuck-up.


Her Majesty's a pretty nice girl, but she hasn't a lot to say.
 
2013-07-17 07:10:39 PM

BattleFrenchie28: I heard a lot of people are waiting to name their kids so the kid could have the same name as the royal baby. I hope this doesn't lead to a bunch of babies named miscarriage.

/window seat please


This is our daughter, Anencephaly."
 
2013-07-17 07:14:00 PM
They'll never top Pierre Trudeau, who had his wife induced on Christmas Day. You know who else had a son born on that day? Yeah, Trudeau thought he was God.
 
2013-07-17 07:15:00 PM

miss diminutive: Royal officials have remained vague about the due date of the baby so the world media's has been camped since July 1 outside St. Mary's Hospital in London where Kate is due to give birth, growing increasingly impatient with what has been dubbed the "Great Kate Wait".

Is the birth being announced by smoke signal? Why is the media camped out at the hospital when the world can find out through a simple phone call?


You're really asking that in this day and age when a report on the 11:00 news starts with "You can't see it now in the dark, but RIGHT behind me, about a mile away, earlier this morning..."?
 
2013-07-17 07:21:13 PM
cdn.3news.co.nz
*SNIFF* Um, mummy...
 
2013-07-17 07:21:24 PM

Four Horsemen of the Domestic Dispute: [www.gossipcop.com image 400x336]
Hurry up and pop it out you wanker!


I want a Jon Lovitz reprise role on SNL as the Queen.

/sketch with Chris Evert was hilarious
 
2013-07-17 07:23:36 PM
Camilla is in stable condition.
 
2013-07-17 07:26:21 PM

uncleacid: Camilla is in stable condition.


Oh, quit foaling around.
 
2013-07-17 07:27:00 PM

BattleFrenchie28: I heard a lot of people are waiting to name their kids so the kid could have the same name as the royal baby.


Currently pregnant (due in November) and my fear is that the name we've already picked out will also be the royal baby's name. I don't want my kid going through his or her life explaining, "No, my parents didn't name me after Prince/Princess ____.".

I'll be especially irked if they have a little prince and use the same name that I've already picked, seeing as the name I've picked is in honor of my father who passed away several years ago.
 
2013-07-17 07:27:12 PM

bangmaid: serious question: Do Brits actually like the queen? She seems like a biatch. Plus there's the whole thing where she had Princess Di killed. Is she resented for that, or is she like royalty over there?


She has her ups and downs.

www.scraundler.com
 
2013-07-17 07:29:10 PM
Wait, naming a possible future English King James?

James I was a good monarch but generally had one of the most debauched courts in history.

James II was run out of rails in the Glorious Revolution - literally so out of touch he thought throwing the Great Seal into the Thames would stop government (They just made a new one...).
 
2013-07-17 07:32:42 PM
I thought what's her face already popped out the royal thing.
 
2013-07-17 07:38:32 PM
When you do nothing for a living, what do you do on vacation ?
 
2013-07-17 07:41:52 PM

The My Little Pony Killer: I thought what's her face already popped out the royal thing.


No, no. You are thinking of the baby Yeezus
 
2013-07-17 07:43:09 PM

stuhayes2010: When you do nothing for a living, what do you do on vacation ?


Do nothing, but on a boat.
 
2013-07-17 08:05:19 PM

bangmaid: serious question: Do Brits actually like the queen? She seems like a biatch. Plus there's the whole thing where she had Princess Di killed. Is she resented for that, or is she like royalty over there?


Maybe you're trolling, but the Queen definitely didn't have Diana killed, though she was briefly unpopular for not mourning publicly enough.
 
2013-07-17 08:10:34 PM

aevorea: BattleFrenchie28: I heard a lot of people are waiting to name their kids so the kid could have the same name as the royal baby.

Currently pregnant (due in November) and my fear is that the name we've already picked out will also be the royal baby's name. I don't want my kid going through his or her life explaining, "No, my parents didn't name me after Prince/Princess ____.".

I'll be especially irked if they have a little prince and use the same name that I've already picked, seeing as the name I've picked is in honor of my father who passed away several years ago.


I've seen you post the same inane comment in other royal baby threads. if they take "your" name and you still don't want to "share" it then CHANGE it. I do not understand people who would name their kid before they even meet him.

And yes, they will definitely ask your brat if he was named after that other brat in buckingham palace.

my brother was born same year as the prince (and William is a family name). He got asked that stupid shiat constantly.

but then again, people are stupid. Do whatever the hell you want. Honor your dad and to hell with the idiots

and stop posting about your babby and this stupid name thing already
 
2013-07-17 08:20:04 PM

Kid the Universe: aevorea: BattleFrenchie28: I heard a lot of people are waiting to name their kids so the kid could have the same name as the royal baby.

Currently pregnant (due in November) and my fear is that the name we've already picked out will also be the royal baby's name. I don't want my kid going through his or her life explaining, "No, my parents didn't name me after Prince/Princess ____.".

I'll be especially irked if they have a little prince and use the same name that I've already picked, seeing as the name I've picked is in honor of my father who passed away several years ago.

I've seen you post the same inane comment in other royal baby threads. if they take "your" name and you still don't want to "share" it then CHANGE it. I do not understand people who would name their kid before they even meet him.

And yes, they will definitely ask your brat if he was named after that other brat in buckingham palace.

my brother was born same year as the prince (and William is a family name). He got asked that stupid shiat constantly.

but then again, people are stupid. Do whatever the hell you want. Honor your dad and to hell with the idiots

and stop posting about your babby and this stupid name thing already



How is babby named?  How is babby named?  How birth certicifat get filed in?
 
2013-07-17 08:23:26 PM

saintstryfe: Wait, naming a possible future English King James?

James I was a good monarch but generally had one of the most debauched courts in history.

James II was run out of rails in the Glorious Revolution - literally so out of touch he thought throwing the Great Seal into the Thames would stop government (They just made a new one...).


You do realize that monarchs don't always take their given names when they ascend to the throne, right? There's been some bad luck with Charles as a regal name, for example, so people generally expect Prince Charles to rule as King George VII to honor his grandfather, and there's been speculation about Philip as well.

Let's look at the last few British monarchs: George VI was born as Albert, Edward VIII was born as Edward, George V was born as George, Edward VII was born as Albert (Prince Albert ring a bell?), Victoria was born as Alexandrina.
 
2013-07-17 09:12:47 PM
"Her vagina's about to look like a run over banana peel."

They always look like that when I'm done with them, what's the problem?
 
2013-07-17 09:33:41 PM
Who the hell cares?

At least in America anyway.  Seriously.  Some rich biatch in the 0.0001% who represents the oppressive regime that we fought a war to get rid of is having an heir.

These are people who are there because their ancestors could muster armies more powerful than their opponents and nothing else.   They claimed the "Divine Right of Kings".

So why the fark does anyone worship them at all?
 
2013-07-17 09:51:51 PM
I'm surprised they haven't induced whatchamacallit, labour.

Promptness is the politeness of princes. (There's a maxim you aren't likely to hear from two people today.)

Do British Royals give live birth or do they lay eggs?    ; )
 
2013-07-17 10:25:27 PM
Am I the only one that's got blacker than a panther in the skin department for the baby?

/ it would be hilarious
 
2013-07-17 10:59:45 PM
Meh.

/fin
 
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